Ricky heard Himchan yelling his name from his phone that was currently on the floor but he simply couldn’t bring himself to pick it up.

            It can’t be true right? Even if it is that doesn’t mean that Changjo will have HIV. He only gave him a ; Changjo never said they had . Ricky was jolted from his thoughts when he heard his phone ring. He quickly picked it up off of the floor and saw that Himchan was calling him again. After taking a deep breath to calm his nerves he picked up the call.

“Neh hyung.” Ricky said in a low tone to stop his voice from shaking.

“Ricky are you ok? I suddenly heard a crash and then you wouldn’t answer me.”

            “I’m fine but is it true?”

            “I don’t know. If only he could keep it in his pants!” Ricky heard Himchan getting worked up over the phone and realized that he wasn’t the only person worrying about his best friend.

            “It’s going to be ok hyung. I mean they make medicine and stuff. I’m sure he’ll be fine.” Ricky said, trying to convince himself as well as Himchan.

            “Yea…Do you mind if I come over? I just want to be with you right now.”

            Ricky thought about it for a moment but realized Changjo was still over and really didn’t want his friend to leave after learning this new information.

            “Uh…Changjo is still here and…”

            On the other end of the line Himchan could hear it in Ricky’s voice that he was about to say no. He didn’t want to be put second to Changjo anymore though.

            “Please Ricky?” Himchan asked again hoping Ricky would hear it in his voice just how much he needed the younger boy at the moment.

            “Hyung...I can’t. I mean…”

            “It’s ok,” Himchan cut him off, realizing that Ricky was choosing Changjo over him again. He was upset about it but he wasn’t going to take it out on the younger boy. “I understand. Just call me later, ok?”

            “Alright hyung, and remember that everything will be fine so don’t worry too much.”

            “Yea.” With that Himchan hung up the phone ending the conversation. He had pulled over to the side of the road about six blocks away from Ricky’s house to talk to him on the phone. Except the conversation didn’t go as he planned.

            Himchan threw his phone into the seat next to him and rested his head on top of the steering wheel. “Will I ever be number one in your heart Ricky?” He asked himself out loud before starting his engine and heading home.

~~~~~~~~~~~

            Ricky placed his phone back in his pocket before leaving his room and going back to Changjo. He didn’t know how he should act around his friend now. He really wanted to know if Changjo did anything that might have exposed him to the virus but he didn’t know how to ask without making Changjo mad. When Ricky saw Changjo though, he was on the phone, which he was grateful for because it gave him a little bit more time to think about how he would bring the subject up and ask Changjo.

            “Alright, I’m at Ricky’s house. You remember where he lives right? Ok! I’ll see you soon hyung!” Changjo said before hanging up the phone and turning around to see that Ricky was back.

            Changjo had the biggest smile on his face and Ricky was wondering why, he knew the best way to find out would be to ask. “I’m guessing that was a good phone conversation?”

            “You don’t even know Ricky! It was Yongguk! He said that he wanted to see me!! That he had something to talk to me about. I think we’re going to get back together Ricky!” Changjo said excitedly. Ricky knew that wasn’t the reason he called him but he was sort of happy that Yongguk was going to tell Changjo and he didn’t have to do it. It was Yongguk’s responsibility to let Changjo know.

            “Oh really, well maybe it would be for the best if you guys didn’t get back together.” Ricky said not able to keep his feelings in about the older boy.

            “Why do you say that Ricky? He’s the perfect guy for me!”

            “Well, I heard from Himchan that he’s a huge player. Who knows how many people he’s slept with?” Ricky said even though Himchan never told him that but he didn’t want his friend to keep believing in a guy that was so horrible.

            “Well he isn’t like that anymore. I’ve changed him, he only wants me now.”

            “He told you that he wanted to take a break yesterday.”     

            “And it’s over today. So that obviously means that he didn’t mean it.”

            “Changjo…”

            “Why can’t you just be happy for me Ricky?! You should be happy that Yongguk and I are back together!”

            “I can’t be happy that you’re with him though!!”     

            “Why?!”

            “Because he has HIV!!”

            Ricky quickly covered his mouth as Changjo looked at him, stunned, by what had just left his best friends mouth. It felt like ages, but turned out to only be five minutes, before either of them spoke a word to each other.

            “C-Changjo I…”

            “You’re lying…”

          “What?” Ricky looked confused but then sighed when he realized Changjo didn’t believe him. “No, I’m not.”

            “Yea you are!! Why would you even say something stupid like that?!” Changjo yelled, no longer listening to Ricky.

            “I’m not!! Himchan told me!!” Ricky screamed back.

            “Shut the up!! You’re just jealous that I have a ing amazing boyfriend while you are stuck my boyfriend’s lackey!! You’ve only ever been jealous of me and that I’ve been more popular than you!!”

            “Is that what you really think of me?! That I would say something like this because I’m jealous?!” Ricky couldn’t believe that Changjo would ever think something like that about him.

            “What other reason is there?!”

            “You…” Before Ricky could finish his sentence Changjo’s phone rang. Changjo quickly picked it up to realize that it was Yongguk calling.

            “Are you here hyung? No you don’t have to come inside. I’ll be outside in a minute."

            Ricky, even though completely pissed off at Changjo by this point, still didn’t want his friend to leave with that bastard so he tried to stop him one last time. “Changjo, please…can you just forget out him?”

            “Could you forget about Himchan?” 

            “If you really wanted me to…then yea.” Ricky said softly. He knew the older boy really liked him but deep within his own heart he couldn’t stop himself from loving Changjo. No matter how much of an Changjo was to him. 

            Changjo let out a harsh sigh before heading to Ricky’s front door, Ricky on his heels. “You simply don’t understand anything about love.” Changjo said before opening the door and walking off to Yongguk’s car.

            Ricky watched as his best friend got in and drove away, silent tears streaming down his face. “You simply don’t know that I love you.” He whispered out as he watched the car drive off until he was no longer able to see it.

            Ricky wiped away his tears, trying to tell himself to not cry over the other boy anymore. He knows now that nothing he could ever do could make Changjo see how much he loves him and he refuses to wait any longer. So he got his phone and called Himchan knowing that he was the one person that was able to stop him from thinking about Changjo. It only took a couple of seconds for Himchan to pick up.

            “Ricky-ah.”

            “Hyung, do you still want to come over?” Ricky asked, fighting to keep his tears inside.

            “Ricky your voice sounds weird. Are you ok?”

            “Neh hyung. I’m fine, so are you going to come over?”

            “I’ll be there soon.” Himchan hung up the phone and Ricky let out a sigh as he sat on his couch and waited for his boyfriend to come over and comfort him.

            Himchan kept his word and showed up soon, really soon. Ricky didn’t expect him to make it there in fifteen minutes. Nevertheless he was still happy to see Himchan and quickly let him in. They didn’t even make it out of the doorway before Himchan wrapped his arms around the younger boy tightly. Ricky slowly lifted his arms to hug Himchan back as he rested his head on his chest.

            “You’ve been crying Ricky.”

            “No I haven’t.

            “Yes you have.” Himchan pulled away but, just enough so that he could see Ricky’s face. “Your eyes are slightly puffy and red, and so is your nose. Plus your face is still stained with tears.” Himchan said as he caressed the younger boy’s cheek softly.

            Ricky pulled himself away from Himchan and walked into his bedroom, no longer wanting to be in the living since that’s where Changjo was not too long ago. Himchan of coursed followed him and soon they were both sitting on Ricky’s bed not saying a word to each other. Himchan was trying to wait for Ricky to speak up but he soon realized that he was going to have to say something first if he wanted him to speak.

            “Why were you crying Ricky? Is it because of what I told you?”

            Ricky shook his head and that left Himchan with only one other reason as to what caused Ricky to cry. “Was it Changjo?”

            “Yes, but you don’t have to worry anymore hyung because I’ve decided to really give up on Changjo now. I’m going to give my all to this relationship and not hold back anymore hyung.”

            Himchan cupped Ricky’s cheek and started to lean in closer but just as their lips were about to touch he stopped.

            “Please Ricky; please tell me that you’re not simply playing with my emotions. I would really hate to fall too deep just to have you abandon me at the bottom of this cold and dark well.”

            This was one of those moments that made Ricky feel like the older one. To see Himchan being so dependent on him, it made Ricky’s heart skip a couple of beats. Ricky simply leaned in the rest of the way and connected their lips.

            “It won’t be cold and dark because I’ll be right beside you holding a flashlight and keeping you warm.” Ricky said before leaning in to kiss him again. This one lasted longer than the last and Ricky wanted to prove to the older boy that he was serious. So he slowly pushed Himchan down on his bed before straddling him. They had made out before so Ricky sort of knew what he had to do to make Himchan feel good. However, just as he started to lightly grind his hips onto Himchan’s, the older boy stopped him.

            “Ricky, I didn’t want to come over just so we can do this. I’m not saying that it’s not great or anything,” Himchan rushed out, “but I just have something that I need to tell you, especially if you plan on being with me seriously.”

            Himchan’s voice had lowered an octave and Ricky could tell that he had something serious to talk about. So he slowly removed himself from his previous position and sat on his bed cross-legged waiting for Himchan to continue.

            “Ricky-ah, what I’m about to tell you…please don’t be mad at me,” Himchan paused trying to get his thoughts in order on the best way he would deliver this information to the other boy as well as not freak him out at the same time.

            Too bad that’s exactly what he was doing as Ricky started to become nervous, not knowing what was about to come out of Himchan’s mouth.

            “I won’t be mad at you, so please tell me hyung.”

            Himchan sighed before continuing. “Before I started dating you, Yongguk and I we would…well we were…” Himchan stopped again and Ricky was literally about to lose his mind.

            “You were what hyung? Just tell me, please!”

            Himchan figured there was no good way to say this so he simply blurted it out. “We were buddies. Friends with benefits.”

            Ricky’s eyes went wide as he slowly put two and two together. “So that means…you’ve slept with him before?”

            Himchan slowly nodded his head. He didn’t want Ricky to know about it but he felt that if they were going to have a serious relationship now that he should tell the boy everything that he felt that he needed to know.

            “So that means that you might also have…”

            “Yea…” Himchan cut him off. Not wanting to be reminded that he could be carrying a virus inside of him that could potentially kill him. “Do you hate me now?”

            “I don’t know. I mean, no, I don’t hate you but I don’t know what I should do now. Do you think I might also have it?”

            “I don’t see how. We haven’t done anything past kissing. The chances of you getting it from me are slim-to-none.”

            Ricky let out a sigh of relief after Himchan said that but then he quickly felt bad for doing so. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound relieved, it’s just…”

            “Don’t worry. If I was you I probably would be feeling the exact same way.”       

            “So, are you going to get testing hyung?”

            Himchan nodded his head and gave the boy a small smile. “Will you come with me?”

            “Of course I will. I said I wasn’t going to leave you and there’s no reason for me to abandon you now.” They shared one more quick kiss before finding comfort in each other’s arms, hoping that everything would work out fine in the end.

 ~~~~~~~~

            On the other side of town there was a couple sharing more than just a quick kiss. They were having a full out make out session clad only in their underwear. However, for one of them there was something in the back of his mind that kept him from fully enjoying the pleasure that his boyfriend was giving him. That in the end he had to end up pushing him away to address it.

            Yongguk let out a harsh sigh before looking at the boy that just pushed him away with dark, lust filled eyes. “Why are you pushing me away?”

            “I-I think we need to talk about something.”

            “We can talk later. Right now, let’s just focus on something else.” Yongguk said as he leaned in and attached his lips to Changjo neck. Changjo tried to simply enjoy Yongguk’s kisses but it was hard when all that was in his mind was what Ricky said.

            “H-Hyung…I heard something funny today.” Changjo started to try and slowly lead into it without upsetting the older male.

            “Tell me later.”

            “It was just so ridiculous. I mean I told the person it wasn’t true but they kept going.”

            Yongguk realized that this wasn’t going to go anywhere until Changjo said what he had to say so he moved off of the boy and stared at him. “Alright, continue. You obviously have something to say, so just spit it out.”

            “It’s nothing really. It’s just that I heard; it’s silly really.”    

             “Just spit it out!” Yongguk said raising his voice.

            “Someone said that you might have HIV…” Changjo all but whispered out but Yongguk heard it and he swore in his head that he was going to kill Himchan.

            “Oh really? Well I don’t.”

            Changjo face lit up as a large smile placed itself there. “Really! I knew it wasn’t true!”

            “Obviously you didn’t because you pushed me away because that was bothering you right?”

            “Not really. I just thought…”

            “Whatever. Let’s drop it.” Yongguk said as he stood up and started to put his jeans back on. Changjo became nervous that he had upset the older boy again and that he was going to break up with him.

            “Yongguk, are you mad at me?”

            “No, I just not in the mood to do this anymore. Come on, let’s go out for pizza or something.”

            “You’re not breaking up with me again?”

            “Not unless you want me to.”

            Changjo quickly shook his head before jumping out of the bed to put his clothes on as well.

            “Good, now hurry up. I’m hungry.”

            Soon they were on their way to get something to eat. Yongguk decided he wasn’t going to do anything with the younger boy until his next set of test results come back. He couldn’t bear knowing that he willing gave HIV to Changjo while knowing that he might have it. He might be a player but he’s not a murderer.

Update!! Whoo!! So now you guys know that I'm not dead just extremely busy. I should be sleeping since I have Japanese class in less than 7 hours but whatever. I want to thank all of you that voted in my poll and don't worry. I'm not going to end this story too soon. Probably chapter 40. I personally just felt it was getting a little long and simply wanted to know your opinion. For the people that said they're confused feel free to ask me anything. I will answer all of your questions that you have about the story. Hmm...what else. I think that's it. 

~Side Talk~

Me: Welcome to another segment of Side Talk. Today with us we have the Jongkey couple, ChanRick couple, and the BangHim couple!

Changjo: You ed it up again! I told you that Yongguk and I are a couple and Ricky is dating Himchan!

Key: Watch your mouth! And since when did you get back together with that ?!

Yongguk: Who are you calling an ?!

Key: Do I need to choke you again to show you your place?!

Yongguk: *Silent*

Key: That's what I thought. 

Me: Alright, back to me!

Key: This is about us though.

Me: No, it's actually all about me. So shut the up and just sit there and try to look pretty.

Key: I always look pretty!

Me: Really? I've never seen you ever looking semi-attractive.

Jjong: He's attractive to me and that's all that matters.

Me: Whatever, let me just ask these questions so I can go to sleep. The first comes from SHINee_Babyy and is for Changjo. They asked: If Ricky ever asked you out, on a proper date, would you go. NOT AS FRIENDS.

Changjo: That's not going to happen but if it did, I don't know since I'm currently taken.

Ricky: Point is though is that it's never going to happen. I'm very happy being with Himchan and don't need anyone else.

Me: Nice to see that you've finally moved on. The next question is from the same person and they asked Key: Do you forgive Jonghyun after your tryst last night? If not, what does he have to do to make it better?

Key: Jonghyun and I are pretty much cool now. So yea, I forgive him.

Jonghyun: I'm not called the master of seduction for no reason.

Key: Alright master, you're not all that. Plus I topped you.

Changjo; *fingers in ears* lalala I can't hear anything.

Me: Oh calm down you big baby, you act like you haven't done equally as nasty things with Yongguk.

Changjo: That doesn't mean I want to hear about my parents life.

Key: What does she mean you've done things with Yongguk?!

Changjo: Nothing!! I swear!!

Me: Sure...you haven't done anything. Moving on. The next question is for Yongguk. It's from Samandy79 and they asked: now that you suspect you may be HIV positive, do you wonder why was so important to you and what the root cause of all your reckless behavior is? Actually they have a bunch of questions. For Himchan: you are always running off to rescue Yongguk, why do you love him so much but won't be in a love relationship with him? Why does it have to stop at friends with occasional benefits? Their last question is for Key and Jonghyun: What have you taught Changjo about education and the need for protect during oral as well as or l ? Well that was long. Let's let Yongguk answer his first.

Key: Wait! You're HIV positive and you've been hanging around my baby?! I have every right to kill you right now!!

Me: Jonghyun restrain your .

Key: What did you call me?!

Me: Yongguk you may answer now.

Key: Did you just ignore me?!

Me: Shut the hell up! I'm tired and you're pissing me the off!! Now answer the question Yongguk! 

Yongguk: Damn, well isn't important but it is nice. I mean who doesn't like ? And the root of my reckless behavior? I guess my parents never being around and my dad touching me as a child...bull! Were you expecting me to say some sentimental ?! I act the way I do because I can. The test results are probably wrong so I have nothing to worry about. 

Me: Alright, next Himchan. 

Himchan: Well Yongguk and I have been together for as long as I can remember and he's my best friend so of course I'm going to go to him when he's in trouble. Our friends with benefits was something that made us both happy but it's over now because I have Ricky. 

Me: Last is Key and Jonghyun.

Key: We've told Changjo about ed. He knows what he should and shouldn't do. Also that I will kill him if he catches an STD or gets a girl pregnant. So I'm not too worried.  

Jonghyun: Ditto. 

Me: Kay the next question comes from jess_mmam and is for Jonghyun. They asked: Bomi is 20 years old, why do you have to have a good relation or a relation at all with Sekyung for her? She's not a baby; she came to you without her mother's help! And why are you worshiping Sekyung so much? You didn't believe your husband's words, took her side and think she can't do bad? 

Jonghyun: I simply don't want her mother to put bad ideas about me in her head and I feel like it would simply be better if we were all on good terms. I'm not worshipping Sekyung in any way and I do believe Key.  

Key: Only when it's convenient for you. 

Jonghyun: Please don't start Key. 

Me: Yes, please don't. There is only one question left and I want to be in bed by 4:30 at the latest. The last question comes from jongkey248 and they asked Jonghyun: Why won't you trust Key when he says that Sekyung said something mean about Changjo? She may be the mother of your daughter but she ain't jesus! 

Jonghyun: I just answered this. 

Me: I know. I just agree with her when she says that Sekyung isn't Jesus. 

Key: I thought you wanted to sleep. 

Me: Oh I do. Thus why this Side Talk is over! I hope all your questions were answered the way you wanted them to be. And see you all next time!!

Sorry for the rushed Side Talk but I was about to not do it at all since I'm so tired but I wanted to give it to you guys but I didn't want to put the chapter off any longer just because of this. I hope it was somewhat decent, even though some of you have admitted that you don't read it. That's cool with me. Alright I'm going to stop talking. I still have to color this and it's 3:50AM. Anyway see you all next time!

~Lolo