Nine: Suicidal
Blue Kiss
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-Aerin’s POV- It was a rather warm January night when my father and I decided to go driving around downtown Madrid upon my insistence. I was about to begin my first year in high school and my parents decided to go out of the country with me as a celebration. They loved to celebrate a lot. Though my father was as authoritarian as he could get, he still had that habit of spoiling me, his one and only child. We boarded the car while umma stayed behind at the hotel, complaining of headache. “So where shall we go first? I heard about that world class restaurant and the food is to die for,” he asked me. I nodded. “That would be nice. I’d like to go there,” I answered eagerly. My father laughed. He rarely saw me that happy. I guess they were used to my dull yet multi-faceted nature. They often said I was giving them whiplashes with my mood changes, but I was happy then and it couldn’t be better. We were busy talking about high school life and how it was better than anything else, including college. He and my mother usually loved talking about their experiences, hoping I’d learn from them. We were talking in a rather light mood, laughing from time to time when he touched the subject about boys. I didn’t really like it when he discussed it with me. It was annoying. “I know, appa. No need to talk about it.” “I insist. You must know,” he said stubbornly. He was like that because his mother and father married off after high school and it was a complete disaster. I guess that was his drive for striving to make a name of his own without the shadow of his past obscuring it. “I won’t marry anyone. I don’t plan to,” I said. He chuckled. “Don’t be so sure. You might fall in love with someone someday. It’s not impossible.” I shrugged. “Stop ruining my mood.” Silence followed that then we exchanged glances and dissolved into laughter. The next thing I knew, I heard the sound of screeching tires and glass shattering, spraying shards all over the place. I couldn’t see. All I knew was that my entire right side was hurting so much as if someone had been beating me for hours. I couldn’t see with the bright lights flooding my eyes, blue, red and white flashing around me like planets revolving. My head throbbed and I was disoriented, but I could definitely smell something that was making my stomach do somersaults. That odd mixture of rust, burnt rubber and smoke filled my lungs, the acrid smell threatening to rob me of all consciousness. I can hear sirens and people talking in Spanish at the same time, some were screaming while others were just crying. The noise around me gave me the feeling that I was about to die and yet I know I wasn’t. Above all the cacophony, I felt a light and warm pressure on my hand as if someone was holding it. It took me a long time to muster all the composure I could until I finally saw what was happening. Appa was holding my hand in his, whispering something. Tears began falling from eyes when I saw the state he was in. His side of the car was crushed and he was pinned between the seat and another car that collided with us. Blood was everywhere and I could feel some of mine dripping down to my eyes, blurring my vision. He smiled at me one last time then he closed his eyes, the pressure on my hand slackening. I lost consciousness after that, but I could still hear him speaking to me. “Aerin-ah…I love you and your umma…Saranghae…” he said. Those words kept repeating themselves in my mind, but each time, it would sound fainter and farther away until it just fades. I woke up in a break of sweat, catching my breath as I sat up. I felt parched like I’ve been running miles. I felt slightly disoriented. Head rush, I thought to myself as I looked around my dimly lit room. I was relieved to be safe and sound under the covers, but still, I was shaking. The scenes from almost two years ago played themselves vividly in my mind over and over again like a rerun in the theatre. I felt a slow and lingering pain surrounding my chest cavity when I realized that I was having a bad dream. I tried to remember it again, consciously trying to figure out what went wrong, but I couldn’t. Even my father’s face was blurry like I’m staring at him through a puddle of mud. Without knowing why, my attention was driven to the calendar. I chuckled bitterly as fresh tears filled my eyes. It’s been exactly two years, appa. How are you doing? -Sehun’s POV- “Oppa?” I muttered. Tsk. What was that girl thinking? She just made things worse for herself. She’s one of them now, one of the people who were after the school’s biggest playboy, Park Chan Yeol. Whatever she says, it would seem that way to eve
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