Epik High’s “Fan”

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Kai’s POV~

It was only first period and I was already bored to tears. I can’t even begin to count how many times I’ve already yawned at Mr. Lee’s lectures. I hated having World History for first period, it never appealed to me. I checked my phone underneath the table, to see what time it was.

I still had half an hour left for this class. .

I lazily stared outside the window, looking at the neighboring cherry blossom tree. It was empty, bare of its usual pretty pink flowers and buds.

Noona would’ve said something about the ugly tree.

It was going to be my 10^th birthday tomorrow, and I couldn’t help but lie in anticipation as I stared at my alarm clock, waiting for midnight to hit.

“Only ten more minutes.” I whispered to myself. Everyone was well asleep by now, and father was out with noona to talk about something.

I wonder if they went out to go get me a present. Maybe I’ll wish for that new race car I saw yesterday with father. I couldn’t help but roll over side to side, excited by the idea.

I saw the lights turn on in the halls and heard my mother’s delicate footsteps approach the front door. I took this time to quickly turn away from the door so my face wouldn’t be shown. I realized that I can never pretend to sleep; my eyelids always twitch even though I’m sure I close them tight.

There were hushed murmurs before I heard my mother yelling,

“You did what?!” After that yell I heard my other noona get up from the room next to mines. My parent’s tried to tell her to go back to sleep, but she was never one to obey their rules.

“How could you do that to unnie?!” My noona was yelling as well. What was going on? I wanted to get up out of bed and ask why they were yelling, but something told me to stay still. After several shouts my noona marched back to her room and slammed her door shut.

“How dare you do that?! What gave you the right mind to sell our daughter to another company like that?!” My mother yelled, her voice cracking. I knew she was already crying, after a few seconds her sobs were well heard. My father replied,

“Shhh, you’ll wake up Kai. I had to, our company was in a lot of debt and this was the only way.” My mother hissed back at him,

“There is always a way, one that is better than selling off your own daughter to another company! How could you do this to her against her own will?” My mother walked away and I heard her slam their bedroom door shut, followed by its locking.

My father went down to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and after a few minutes I saw all the lights turn off and all was still once again.

Noona, they’re just lying right? You’re not actually gone and sold off, right? You’ll come back … right?

I looked at the clock and it was midnight. I rolled into a ball and held both my hands towards my chest.

“Please make sure noona will be back tomorrow morning.”

“Mr. Kim!” I snapped my head back up, trying to get back into reality as the teacher bore his menacing glare down at me. The student’s all looked at me, and I had no idea what was going on.

“Care to tell us your opinion on the matter?” Mr. Lee snapped, already fed up with my lack of interest.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” I answered in a monotone voice. He sighed and shook his head, continuing with the lesson.

I really need to pay attention, yet how can I when I’m running on 5 hours of sleep?

My eyes snapped open when I heard the floor creek. I got up out of bed, hopes already high thinking noona would be here.

“Noona?” I whispered. My mouth was covered and, for a second, I really thought it was noona. But I turned around and, sure enough it was noona … just not the one I was wishing for.

“Kai, go back to bed.” She whispered to me. I figured that after the door slamming, she’d just go to bed and ignore our parents the rest of the week. But this was different. After my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I saw past her that she was holding a suitcase.

She met my eyes and I knew that she was aware of what I realized.

“Noona, please don’t leave me…” My voice trailed off as I was threatening to cry. She hushed me and said,

“I’m sorry Kai, I can’t stand this household anymore. Father selling off unnie was the last straw, I can’t stay here any longer.” I clung onto her arms and said,

“Take me with you.” But she only shook her head. She told me quietly with the softness our mother used,

“I can’t do that Kai. You’re still so young and small, I can’t take you away. I think that with you as the only child, it’ll be much easier.” She kissed my forehead and handed me a box.

I know what you’re thinking. I could’ve easily shouted and woken up the entire house, making sure my last noona would never leave me. But my feet were glued to the floor, and my mouth refused to make any sound.

My hands clenched at the box and I heard the ruffling of paper. I looked down and realized it was a wrapped gift; my last birthday present from noona.

“Mr. Kim, unless you want a week’s worth of detention, I advise you to take your test and leave this classroom now.” I hadn’t even realized the bell had rung. The classroom was nearly empty and Mr. Lee was standing beside me, holding out a paper.

I stood up and took it from his hands, walking out of the room; lost in my memories.

Believe it or not, my father didn’t even bother sending the police to look for my noona. I never heard from either one of them ever again. And after that? My family’s business boomed and we were soon brought up to the top. We went from a life of near bankruptcy to a life of luxury, surrounding ourselves with jewels and bathing in money.

I rounded the corner and went to my locker, shoving my books in and taking out a notebook for my next class.

“Looks like someone’s having a bad day.” The queenka teased as she leaned against a nearby locker. She snatched my test from my hands and shook her head disapprovingly.

“Kai, take my advice and go play with the little genius.

Speaking of her…” She handed me back the paper and walked off. I looked behind me and there she was. Eunjae holding her pile of books closely to her chest, as if someone might steal them away from her.

I stared down at the page, crumpled it up, and threw it into a trash can after seeing the pathetic score:

45/100.

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