In the training ground of Nakayama castle, Haruna sheathed her sword after doing her regular self-training. She ambled down her way back to her shared chamber. After taking a bath, she sat herself on her vanity chair, drying her hair with a towel. From the circle mirror before her, she could see the reflection of the huge four post bed on the other side of the chamber. She and Yuma were indeed sharing a bed, yet never did anything but sleep with their backs faced each other….. excluding their wedding night, of course. She shook her head to shove the memory aside.

She realized it had been three days Yuma did not come home due to the return of the Heiwa’s contingent from the capital. As the Governor of Far-East Province, Yuma had to make sure the contingent would reach the border safely. This morning, Hana had started throwing tantrum, missing her father.

She sighed inwardly.

She had not been able to face Yuma properly since the day he declared that he would make her fall for him. It had been three months, but he did not show any change in behavior. He was still him: quiet, calculative, but very kind. Yes, Yuma was very kind. He knew about her feeling for Ryosuke, but he did not mind it. Is he? She wondered. Yuma did not say that he minded it, but he also did not say that he did not mind it. He just said that he understood. And she knew why. Yuma might not tell her, but she knew about his past with that lady who after doing some investigation, she knew the lady was Okamoto Suzuka. What she did not know was whether Yuma still harbored a feeling towards Suzuka. But then she thought the most important now was that Yuma was willing to make their marriage work.

Do I want it work, too?

Of course she did want this marriage work. Ever since she decided to involve herself in this matter, she had no intention to make herself suffer. She deserved to be happy. Just like what Yuya said… and just like what Ryosuke said…

“Give yourself a chance with Yuma. You deserve to be happy, Haruna. Don’t dwell in the past… of yours or him. Think about your future.”

Ryosuke…

What she saw in him that she fell for him in the first place? Since when? She knew from the start that it would be only Mirai in his heart, but before her realizing, she had fallen in love with him. It was only admiration and respect at the beginning but with the course of time she fell deeper and deeper. But, now she was Yuma’s wife. She should not dwell in her unrequited love. She should have moved on, building her own family.

“My lady, Nakayama-sama has arrived,” one of her maids bellowed from outside.

“Alright,” she said.

Immediately she changed into her casual attire, a soft green blouse and dark loose pants. She rarely wore a dress because that was so unlike her. At this she just realized, Yuma never complained about her appearance all this time. Not only that, but he also never forbad her from practicing her sword. He also did not mention anything about her boyish style. Those were so unlike a Nakayama, too. As long as she knew, ladies in Nakayama family should perform a perfect etiquette, and that meant wearing a proper dress, no sword or any weapon, and acted elegantly. Yet, Yuma never demanded her to be like that, not even when his father was still alive back then. She wondered what Yuma did to make his father let her be herself.

As she walked down the hallway, she saw Yuma had been in the middle yard of the house building, carrying Hana in his arms. He smiled and Hana laughed. They seemed sincerely happy.

Hana… she was… a fruit of a deal… the child they needed to secure the alliance with Nakayama. But… she cherished her.

“Mother!” Hana waved her hand enthusiastically and Yuma walked towards her.

Yuma cherished her, too.

“…for Hana… and for our own happiness, give me a chance to win your heart…” Yuma said.

She mustered a smile, jogging towards them while Yuya’s words rang in her ears.

“The only one prevent happiness come to you is yourself, Haru-chan. Let your feeling for Ryosuke go. Open your heart for the man who really wishes for it. Yuma will do you good if you let him.”

Once she arrived at their place, Hana held out her arms to her and she took her daughter from Yuma.

“I’m home, Haruna,” Yuma said, smiling subtly at her, as he used to do.

She had promised to give Yuma a chance. This time she promised to give herself a chance… to learn to accept Yuma, and let go of her old love. As she subtly observed her husband, she admitted, Yuma was indeed a good man. And he had promised to give her the love she could never get from Ryosuke.

“Welcome home,” she returned it with her sincere smile.

And she was looking forward to the day Yuma would fulfill his promise.

**********

Daiki knew once the visit of Kingdoms Alliance Court finished he would have to face the unyielding glare of Yuto, demanding an explanation about Ryosuke. In fact, after Yuri departed to North Province two weeks ago, Yuto had persistently visited him just to ask about it. He had used the contingents’ visit as an excuse back then, but now that it had been over, he should prepare the answer.

True be told, the moment he stepped out his office, Yuto had been waiting.

“Let’s go to somewhere else,” he said before Yuto could speak.

They walked in silence to exit the building. He saw Yuto’s horse had been ready, and he waited for the stable boy to bring his. After his stallion arrived, they rode in medium speed towards his house.

“Give me the explanation, Daiki,” Yuto demanded once the door to his study chamber closed.

“What kind of explanation do you need?”

“All you know about what he has been doing all this time.”

“I can’t tell you all of it,” he quickly answered. “I have promised him not to tell anyone.”

“Why? At least give me a reason. You knew all along where he was while I was desperately looking for him. Do you ever think how worried I was?!”

He let out a mild sigh, “I know, Yuto. But, you’re wrong. I didn’t know where he was all this time.”

Yuto frowned, “What do you mean you didn’t know?”

“See, I indeed communicated with him, but it was always through Yuya. Yuya is the one who knew where he was, what he had been doing, and all you want to know.”

Yuto threw him a disbelieving look, “How could you don’t know? And why should he choose Yuya?”

“The only thing I can explain is that he has been my advisor all this time, but he never showed up before me. And why he chose Yuya, I don’t know, Yuto.” He admitted honestly.

Yuto’s shoulders slumped a bit and the lad took a seat on his couch. “Why should he hide from me in the first place? What did he tell you that you can’t tell me, Daiki?”

“Even though I know, it’s not my right to tell you, Yuto. He’ll tell you by himself when the time comes. You as his best friend should know him better, don’t you?”

Yuto perked up when hearing this, “Yes, I know him. He always shoulders the burdens alone, thinking he is strong to protect his loved ones. He never allows me to really protect him. That is why I’m so worried, Daiki. Because I understand him… He must have been in pain alone… Usually he would just mask it and stand before me as though he didn’t feel any pain, but now he went to the extent of hiding himself… the pain must be unbearable that he couldn’t mask it to face me. ”

He gulped subtly as he heard Yuto ranted. What Yuto said was true. Ryosuke was in pain alone all this time… His mind flew to a distant past.

The memory from that certain night would never leave his mind. That was the first and the only time in his life he saw Ryosuke in his weakness. In the certain chamber of Inner Palace, a month before Ryosuke left and disappeared, Ryosuke buried his face in his own palms. He could not bear seeing Ryosuke like that… drowned in the silent tears, alone. He did only the first thing came into his mind. So he sat down beside the younger and pulled him to his arms. Ryosuke did not resist him and that was when he knew that he had done the right thing. Ryosuke needed someone to lean on.

“Turn out I’m not as strong as I thought…” Ryosuke muttered, his voice was calm, but he knew Ryosuke was cracking inside.

“You’re still a human, Ryosuke. You can get hurt, too.”

“But it shouldn’t hurt this much, Daiki… I have prepared for anything… I’m not supposed to feel this way…” Ryosuke’s head rested on his shoulder while he spoke with barely heard voice.

He did not know how to respond to that. He could not relate to the pain Ryosuke had to bear in that particular time, but he knew that he never hated the fate more than that time.

“At least tell me whether he is fine, Daiki…” Yuto’s plead cut his wandering mind off.

He understood how Yuto felt, but there was no way he would tell Yuto about that moment, because Ryosuke had strictly demanded him not to, and he understood well why Ryosuke did so. One of the reasons Ryosuke left was involving Yuto, after all.

“Yuya told me that he is fine now, just… I think he needs time before he is ready to return to us, Yuto.”

Yuto rubbed a hand to his own face, looked distress that he could not help to say, “You should have known that he just wants to protect us from being hurt, no?” He said, looking at the younger with a tender gaze. “Now the only thing we should do is praying for him, Yuto… May he get his own share of happiness after all he has been through for us.”

Yuto looked back at him, hopeless, and eventually nodded.

**********

Yuri was observing his friend stood at the end of the deck, looking so serene enjoying the view of the sea. It had been a week since he departed from North Province harbor. While he perked up under the rails of the deck, he recalled the moment in the harbor.

“Chii… is that you?”

He turned to the direction, but froze as soon as his eyes landed on the figure. He doubted his eyes, but his heart told him that it was real. The one called him just now was a young man, almost like a stranger, but when he looked more carefully, he recognized him. He as though got a new source of power that he leapt to his feet and dashed to where his caller stood at.

He lurched forward and tackled the man. They sprawled on the sand from the impact.

“Owh! It hurts, Chii.”

“Ryosuke!” He could not help but cry.

“Oi, oi! Don’t start crying now. People will misunderstand us.”

“Baka! Baka! Baka!” He wailed but did not let go of Ryosuke.

Ryosuke chuckled lightly. “If you want to scold me, at least do it properly, Chii. Anyway, you’re getting heavy. Please, get off me.”

He pulled himself up. Ryosuke did the same. For a moment they only sat and stared at each other. He noticed the smile on Ryosuke’s face. It reminded him about their childhood.

“Staring is rude, you know. Am I that charming?” The teasing side of Ryosuke he had not seen for so long.

He frowned as he noticed Ryosuke’s appearance, “What are you wearing?”

“What? It’s my new style. Isn’t this cool?”

“You cut and dyed your hair, and pierced your ear, too,” he stated.

Ryosuke only chuckled, and after a moment it turned into a smile. “Welcome home, Chii.”

At this, he remembered the reason he was there. “I thought you will go to Ryuusei…”

“You’ve met Daiki then I assume.”

“Yes.”

Ryosuke rose to his feet and held a hand out to him which he took to help himself up his feet.

“It’s true. We will depart in an hour.” Ryosuke said while gesturing him to follow. “You come?” Ryosuke tilted his head at him.

“Can I?”

“Since you’ve succeeded infiltrating Ryuusei’s contingent, it won’t be difficult to sneak into our squad.”

“You knew?”

“Just assumption,” Ryosuke shrugged his shoulder. Once they reached a more deserted dock, Ryosuke raised a hand and shouted, “Oi, Yuya!”

A tall man turned to look at them from above the ship, narrowing his eyes to see him. He assumed the man was Takaki Yuya. It was the first time he met Yuya.

Once they got on the ship and reached Yuya’s spot, Ryosuke asked, “