(almost like) The Real Thing {Written by AleatoryThinker}| Review by Scarlett

The title was unique but questionable. Why is 'almost like' bracket up? Well, it leaves me with doubts, why can't you write out the title as 'Almost Like The Real Thing' instead of bracketing the words up. There wasn't a tingle in my heart when I read your title, it wasn't attractive to me when I read it thus if I was a reader that spotted your story, I wouldn't click it. For me, an attractive title is a title which have adjectives and the titles leaves the readers with many questions in their head. However, I couldn't find this in your fanfic's title, thus I do not think that the title is the best choice that you can think of.

The next thing I am going to talk about is the description and foreword. The description didn't reveal any important parts of the plot which was good but it was rather vague. I couldn't understand what you were trying to mean in the story. You talked about this thing that needs a lot of special attention and Kyuhyun could spend the entire night crying and screaming for an entire weekend but he has Ryeowook? So, it might sound like a mystery that you have gave to the readers but it was quite frustrated and I felt annoyed when you kept avoiding talking about that thing. It made me unhappy when you tried to address that object as a 'thing'. Seriously, it would have been better if you thought of a small nickname or a hint, without giving away that object, rather than addressing it as a 'thing'. This is my opinion when I read your story, so I would appreciate it if you could try my suggestion out.

There were some mistakes that I spotted while I was reading your story. 

(Original)"You’ll find grades two through twelve in one of these boxes."

(Edited)" You'll find grade two to twelve in one of these boxes."

Please Subscribe to read the full chapter