Autumn Affection| temporarybliss

Review by exoticbabylove

Notice: This review will not be detailed as there are quite a fair bit of criteria which I left out due to the length of the story. However, I will try my best nonetheless. The characterization part will be shorter than usual.

Title

As for the title, I really like the title as it sounds so comfortable and unqiue. It really caught my attention and I was looking forward to reading it. The word 'autumn' made me very interested as it is my favorite season of the year and it did want me to start clicking on the story to find out what the story is about. You didn't reveal anything regarding the plot or characters so it was a mystery to find out. 

For the word 'affection', I found the word a great pick as it made the title have an amazing personification. I can amazing the cool autumn breeze blowing onto a small tree; the breeze wasn't cool. In fact, it gave warmth and love to the tree's hard. So, I have to admit that this is one of the best titles I have ever seen. One of the best, seriously, because it did give off a lasting image in my head.

If I start looking at your title personally word by word, I loved it even more as it wasn't too long and it gave off a twinkle in the title that attracted readers. So, the length of the title was great and the two words were defintely useful and 'immense', simply saying, it left a lasting impression on me, so good job in creating such a extraordinary title!

Language & Writing Style

As for your language, I do think that you have to look at your sentence structures in closer detail. Let's take your description on the story for an example. I will do some necessary changes if I need to.

Autumn would forever be(will always be) Minra's favorite season.

It was then She found love under the(a) maple tree.

She loved him as much as he loved her.

But he would only be there during autumn,(However, he only appears on autumn days)

leaving Minra to wait for the three other seasons until he comes back.(him for the rest of the year.)

The dried orange leaves of the trees are all falling,

and they’re falling like they’re falling in love

with the ground,(refer to 1 below)

exactly like how Minra is falling in love....

But he did not return one(for a) year.

She never gave up waiting but he never showed up.

Minra still stayed strong, never giving up.

She loved him too much to let him go.(but she couldn't forget him.)

She knew loving him was her destiny.

1) That part of the sentence which I cancelled has a poor sentence structure; affecting the whole sentence to sound weird and awkward. I will not suggest using the phrase 'exactly like how' as it sounds funny and disrupts the sentence flow. I did sound amazing if you had a correct sentence structure as the simile used sounded great. I would recommend re-structuring the sentence again. Try it out!

As for other sentences, there are still hints of sentence structure errors which did irked me. It did upset me as your describing skills are incredible; however, it did spoil the mood when those sentence structure appears. Let's take another example from the story.

-It reminds one of the cold season that is coming and winter is one season not many enjoy.

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