“You drive a Kia Sol?” I asked her. Ri and I started laughing.

“Yeah, I know. It’s a Korean car.”

“No,” I breathe in, “Sol is my other stage name.” I reached for her hand on the shifter. “You drive stick?”

She nodded. “It saves a lot on gas. I have an older car that’s automatic. My mom drives that one.” She looked at the rearview mirror. “Want to eat at In-N-Out? Or at my place?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Ash replied. “As long as I’m with Vic.” She cuddled next to him.

“Yeah, I live on the bottom floor.” She smiled while unlocking the door. “My moms knees are weak, so it’s easier for her to get around.” I smiled. I don’t care. As long as it’s safe. “I know this isn’t something you guys are accustomed to, but I hope you guys can feel comfortable.”

“Babe, it’s okay.” I reassured her. “Trust me, if I had a choice, I wouldn’t live in my place it's too much.”

Looking into the apartment, it’s very simple. I noticed everything matches. All her furniture is black – couch, TV, TV stand, dining table, chairs, lights, even her curtains. Ash and Vic already ran into a room leaving their stuff in the living room.

“We’re staying in here,” she directed me into a room. “The bed is kind of small for 2, but we’ll manage, right?” She smiled. Her room is neat and organized. Posters on her walls of movies, bands, and I noticed she has a poster of me. When I saw that, she walked over to it and tried covering it. “Yeah, my friend bought it for me.” She blushed.

I took off my shoes and sat on her bed. Her bed is so comfortable compared to mine. “What kind of bed is this?” I started pushing myself up and down on it. “It’s so comfortable.”

She shrugged. “My mom picked it out.” She laid on the bed. “So, I know you’re probably wondering what I wanted to tell you last night.”

That’s right. I’ve been thinking about it all day. I laid next to her. “Yeah, we should talk.” We’re both looking at the ceiling. “I know I told you this ..”

“Wait,” she cut me off, “let me go first.” She lifted herself up and was slouched on one hand. She took a deep breath and started laughing. “My life changed when I went to Korea, you know.” She looked at me. “In a good way, I hope.” She started picking at her blanket. “I.. You’ve had education, right?”

education? “Um, yeah. I don’t know. Why?” I started feeling hot.

“We never used a ,” she said firmly. I shook my head. What is she saying?

“Are you pregnant?” I snapped. I sat up and faced her. “Are you?” My voice was a little louder.

She froze. “I’m late.” She whispered. “I took like 3 tests and 2 of them said I was.” She lips started trembling. She closed her eyes. “I threw up this morning, but it could all be because of stress. The test can be inaccurate. I wann…”

She kept talking and talking. I was watching her talk. Her hands were moving everywhere. Her eyes were watery. Is she going to cry? Her voice started getting deeper. Her breathing changed. She kept talking.

And during that time, I was speechless. Speechless. She’s pregnant? With my kid? I’m only 23. I don’t even think I blinked. I just froze watching her.

“What are we going to do?” she finished talking. She grabbed my hand.

I just looked at her. My mouth started moving, but nothing came out. “What?” I finally mumbled.

She let go of me and stood up.. pacing around the room. “This was a mistake.” She leaned against her desk and looked at the door. “This was a mistake.”

A mistake? How else were you suppose to tell me you are pregnant? Or maybe be pregnant? I rubbed my eyes. “What do you want to do?”

She didn’t reply. She didn’t even look at me when I talked. She just faced the door. “Why did you come here?” She scoffed. “Why did you have to come here?”

“Mag,” I stood up and walked to her. “I miss you so much. I mean, I didn’t expect this, but I,” I hugged her but she pushed me off. “Baby,” I begged and forced myself around here. “Baby,” I her hair. “Look, I know this is happening too fast.” I felt her heart racing and she let her guard down. “But we’ll figure it out.”

She nodded and started crying. “I can’t be pregnant now.” She sobbed. “I’m still taking care of my mom.”

Her mom. I sighed. “We’ll figure it out.”

She kept crying for awhile and I finally put her in bed. She fell asleep. She’s probably been so stressed out the past few weeks. It finally all made sense. This is why she has been dodging me. I just looked at her laying there. This girl who means everything to me is so fragile and scared. I rubbed her shoulder and gave her a kiss on the cheek. I put a blanket over her.

She gripped it tighter and pouted. She’s so cute. “I love you so much,” I whispered in her ear. “I really do.” I put my arm on her stomach. “And you too.”

I’ve always wanted to be a dad. Especially since my father has been absent most of my life. I dream of being there for my kids from their first cry, first step, and finally when they leave the house. I just never thought it’d be this soon. I laid down next to her wrapping my arm around her.

I’m going to be a dad.

A father.

She has to come back with me to Korea. There’s no way she’s going through this pregnancy alone.