Ryeowook's POV

I felt tears prick the back of my eyes.  Henry and Kyuhyun were both silent, not knowing how to respond.  Finally I managed to choke out,

"Henli... w-why did you lie to me?"

He sighed and looked at me apologetically,

"I didn't really lie, everything I said was true... I just didn't want to tell you about the accident"

"Why?" I demanded, now that I could remember, I wanted answers.

This time Kyuhyun broke in.  It seemed like he had gone back to the old Kyuhyun, his eyes were blank and his face betrayed no emotion.  His voice was monotone,

"Because, as long as you didn't remember, you were safe.  When you woke up from the coma, you only remembered your parents and you didn't know where you were.  When Seohyun's father found out, he offered to pay to send you to school to cover Seohyun's .  But we all knew that Seohyun just wanted you away so you wouldn't remember.  She would leave you alone as long as you didn't interfere, that's why you were safe when you couldn't remember anything"

"If I couldn't remember anything, then how did you guys know it was Seohyun?"

Even though Kyuhyun seemed to have put back on his cold mask, I could still see a flash of pain in his eyes.

"T-he letter... I wrote it.  I really was planning to meet you in the park that night.  I don't know how Seohyun found out, but she got there before I did... I saw her father's car driving away from the scene... seconds later I found you"

"Y-you were the one who found me?" I whispered.

He looked down at his feet and breathed,

"Yeah..."

Kyuhyun's POV

I couldn't meet his eyes.  The guilt I felt was overwhelming, and it was all I could do not to snap.  I stiffened and looked up in total shock when I felt thin arms wrap around my waist.  I looked down and saw Ryeowook hugging me tightly.

"Wha~" I started, but he cut me off, looking at me tearfully.

"I am so sorry" he whispered, squeezing me tighter.

I looked at him, completely dumbfounded.  I looked at my brother, but he seemed as mystified as I was.

"What are you apologizing for?" I asked, my utter confusion wiping away my emotionless facade.

His face was pressed against my chest so his voice was garbled, but I still managed to make out what he said,

"I'm sorry you had to be the one who found me... you were so young, you must have been so scared"

I was speechless.  No one had ever worried about how I felt about finding him.  No one seemed to care that I couldn't sleep for weeks, the image of his broken body scarring my mind.  No one had ever asked me how I felt when I thought my best friend and love was dead.  No one had ever thought about how I had been affected.

My eyes filled with tears, and I wrapped my arms around him, hugging Ryeowook back.  I laid my head on his shoulder as I began to sob, my voice coming out in broken gasps,

"T-there was s-so much b-blood... s-so m-much..."

He held me tighter, supporting my wieght as he rubbed my back and whispered soothing words.  He was the one who had been broken, yet he was more worried about me.  I breathed in his familiar smell and I was reminded about how I felt towards him.

I couldn't even remember a time when I didn't love him.  Even when he was away, and didn't know who I was, I stilll loved him.  My feelings toward him wasn't just some child's crush that I would eventually grow out of.  As a child, I didn't know that what I felt was love, all I knew was that I needed him.

When he was sent away, I cracked.  Without him, I felt like I was dying, I needed him to breathe.  That's when I became so withdrawn and cold.  I curled into myself, and made myself numb, not feeling anything in order to escape the pain that threatened to consume me.

My parents had been pleased when I returned a virtual robot.  They assumed that my transformation had been due to the cut-throat competition at boarding school, but they were sadly mistaken.  It had simply been my coping mechanism.

As I got older, it became clear to me that my feelings for Ryeowook were love.  Not the sweet puppy love that adults assumed kids were capable of, but a persistent and lasting devotion.  I never stopped missing him, and never stopped thinking about him.

I had accepted that he would never remember me, it hurt, but I had come to terms with it.  As long as he was safe and happy, then I didn't mind being the one who hurt.  I agreed to marry Seohyun mainly because I would be able to ensure that she never harmed Ryeowook again.

I hated her, and the thought of spending the rest of my life with her actually made me sick, but I told myself that I was doing it for Ryeowook.  It disgusted me to think that she had won, she had gotten what she wanted.  It hurt my pride to give in, but I would do it for him.

Now that he was here, in my arms, I didn't even know how to process it.  I had wanted this more than anything in the entire world.  But I was scared, now that he remembered, he was in danger.  If Seohyun found out... I didn't even want to think about what could happen.

My sincerest hope was that even if he remembered the promise, he wouldn't take it seriously.  Sure I wanted to think that he would love me as much as I loved him, and that he would want to be mine.  But I refused to entertain such thoughts.  It was true that him loving me could save my future and that my happiness hung in the balance, but I didn't care.

I prayed that he brushed off our past relationship as nothing more than a simple crush.  If he didn't love me, then he would still be safe.  As long as Seohyun saw he wasn't a threat, then she would have no need to go after him.  It would hurt me, and I would be stuck with someone I hated for the rest of my life, but I would live.

If he had to cross Seohyun again... Ryeowook might not...

I knew I would have to give him up, and I was okay with that.  But for this moment, I let myself pretend that everything would be okay, that I could love him without fear.  I pretended that loving him would never hurt him, and that I actually had a happy future ahead of me with Ryeowook at my side.

I memorized the feeling of holding him, and being held by him.  I soaked in the smell of his hair, and the feeling of his gentle hands my back and hair.  I cemented the wonderful, fuzzy feeling that rose in my chest in my memories, and I relished the warmth of his body against mine.

Finally, I pulled away, tears still leaking out of my eyes.  I smiled shakily, silently thanking him for his kindness, silently thanking him for letting me love him.  He smiled back at me, and although I could see he was scared, I could clearly see that he was concerned for me.  I found some comfort in that, but I hoped that his concern was only that of a friend, a brother.

He couldn't love me, and he couldn't cry for me.  If he did, it would make things so much harder, for both himself, and for me.  Because after this, I would give him up.  Tomorrow morning, I would pretend that I didn't love him, and that my heart didn't beat for him.

I smiled through my pain, knowing that everything I did was for him... only for him.

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This didn't really turn out how I wanted it to, but I hope you guys get the general idea.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you will continue to support this fic ^^

Comments = ~<3

Location: paralyzed with my horror at seeing Kyu's new haircut  *shudders*  Spock much?

Mood: despite being traumatized by the hair, pretty good.  I'm consoling myself with Suju's "Spy" teaser... hot Korean guys with guns... *screams, fangirls, sobs, thanks God for this moment, passes out*

Music: "Rockstar" by Super Junior