Kang Raena

The next day, I went to work and entered the lounge for a cup of morning coffee. However, the sachets were high up, jumping would be useless. I stood there deciding if I should give up the idea on having a cup of morning coffee. But before I could return the Styrofoam cup, a figure stood behind me, his chest was pressed against mine as he reached up for two packets of coffee sachet, dropping one in front of me.

I turned around and it was the usual doctor.

“Good morning, Ice Doctor.” He had developed that nickname for me after the first week.

I grew used to seeing him around as we were one of the few main doctors working in the Critical Care department. I thanked him for the sachet and made my coffee. He started his own as I examined his white gown, it was clean and it left no marks of the bloodstains from the previous day.

“Did you clean off the blood stains?”

“Nope, I just changed for a new gown with the department in charge of our gowns.”

Before we could continue our conversation, two nurses invaded the pantry and conversed, I recognized one of them as the nurse that I conversed with at the empty ward yesterday.

“Did you hear, the baby didn’t survive?”

“The mother was begging the internship doctor to save her baby.”

My throat started closing in on me, no, please tell me they aren’t talking about the same patient that begged me yesterday.

“The baby died, when it came out of her stomach, it was a stillborn. She wailed and locked herself up, not speaking to anybody after.”

My coffee fell from my grip.

“W-what?” I whispered.

I went forward, ignoring Doctor Go’s calls.

“The mother that came in yesterday, bleeding, her baby, died?” I whispered the last word.

The nurses were startled to see me there but still answered me,” Yes, the baby died, many cases of accidents usually leave the babies dead.”

I pushed past both of them and ran towards the ward which I was lingering around yesterday. I slammed past the shoulders of nurses and doctors, ignoring their dirty looks that were being thrown to me. I only had one destination in mind. I reached the ward that I had wanted to go to.

The doors were closed and the binds were pulled down. But another person in white was there as well.

“S-Saemin…”

She looked up and tears were b her eyes.

“Tell me it’s not true, tell me the baby’s alive.”

“I-I can’t, I was the assisting doctor and I saw the s-stillborn myself.”

My hand that was grabbing onto hers limply dropped off. I glanced in the ward through the little glass panel that was on the door, the mother was huddled in the corner of the room, crying as the cot beside her was empty.

Saemin told me,” The nurses just took the stillborn away from her after letting her sleep with him for one night.”

I gently opened the door as Saemin stayed outside, she couldn’t face the mother. The mother looked up and a look of recognition went past her eyes.

“You!” She screamed and trash, throwing things around her towards me.

Her piercing scream was enclosed in the ward as she yelled all her hatred out.

“I begged you to save my baby! I told you I can’t leave without it! Why call yourselves doctors when you can’t save my baby?” She threw her plate of food towards me as the contents spilled around me and the soup splashed straight onto my hands, scalding me.

She continued wailing as I walked closer, she threw more and more things. Yes, indeed, her baby just died in the hands of our doctors. I assured her that everything was going to be fine before she entered the labor room, I gave her hand a squeeze to comfort yesterday. Just yesterday, her blood was all over my hands.

And today, her child was gone.

“Give me my child back! Give me my child back!” She screamed towards me.

Her hand gripped onto the Styrofoam cup beside her as she splashed the contents at me before throwing the cup at me.

“I’m sorry” I whispered at her, looking down, I couldn’t face her.

She took a hold of the vase beside her and lifted it up. Before she could throw it, I was pulled out of the room. My eyes were blurred with tears as I was pulled into a hug. The person made white noises and caressed my hair as he attempted to sooth me.

“It’s okay…”

“N-no, it’s not, how can we have the rights t-to