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Sapporo, Japan

After my competition in China last week, we flew straight to Japan to compete again. My scores in China was again astonishing, making me the 1st placer when I used an upbeat background song titled Digital Witness by St. Vincent choreographed by Luna. It was a good decision from the ISU (International Skating Union) to already allow the use of background music with lyrics after the 2014 Sochi Olympics, a welcome change from the usual and recycled classical songs being used by figure skaters every year.

And now, we're here in Japan for my last tournament before we go back in Seoul. My piece today was also choreographed by Luna and we used Daft Punks' single Get Lucky as my background music. I landed all my jumps perfectly to the delight of the crowd and of course my number 1 fan, Amber.

She was the one who pushed me to train hard and not be afraid to do what I want. I remember the past days when we arrived here in Japan before the event. On the first day, we just rested for an hour then went on to the rink to do an exclusive practice. She drilled me like Unnie does since Jess can't be with us now due to her responsibilities with the team, especially that they already entered the Finals.

Yuri unnie also has to stay in Seoul with the same reason, so all responsibilities for my training and practice is in Amber's hands now on this competition. Of course, the episodes again of bickering and some silly fights while in practice, being the slave driver that she is, making me exhausted and tired every practice ends.

I showered her with threats on her life and curses when I feel so frustrated whenever she will say 'That's Okay.. again!' making me repeat the jumps and spins I did until she says 'Perfect!'. There's nothing I can do about it, she's on her trainer mode the whole time we're practicing. Even my cutie-pie-puppy-eyes-look and pouts are no effects on her while in practice. Even Seductive Jung is no effect on her! Come on!

We've been practicing abstinence for 2 weeks, mutually agreed by us since my training for China started. Well she was the one who came up with that very bright idea and I said okay but after 3 days, the monkey can't keep her hands to herself dying to have me. But because I'm always exhausted from training, there's nothing she can do but meditate and it's her fault too. I Iaughed at her and made a promise that once the competition is over, she can do whatever she wants on me no questions ask.

Now we're here waiting for the last skater to finish her piece, our eyes glued to the score board. The skater performing is Dad's ward and she's really good, she landed all her jumps clean. Amber was holding my hand, more nervous than I am because it's her goal to make me win this competition.

"Babe~..." I whispered to her ears and kissed her cheeks discreetly.

"Y-yes babe?" I can feel the tension on her grip. She turned to me and I giggled at her nervous face.

Tell me, why wouldn't I love this monkey?

"I love you Amber~..." I smiled at her lovingly, our hands intertwined making her calm as we wait for the result.

The winner was announced and of course, it was me. On second place was Dad's ward Suzy Bae, a fellow Korean skater who has trained in the US before. I noticed Suzy rolling her eyes on me when the winner was announced making me chuckle. Sorry girl, whatever you do you'll always be second or third.

After the awarding ceremony, Amber and I are already walking back to the lockers when I heard a voice calling my name. It was a voice I've known all my life.

"Soojung..."

I turned around and it was Dad standing just a few meters away from me with a proud smile on his face. The one he always gives me when I win on my competitions back when I was young. Amber squeezed my hands and urged me to acknowledge my father.

"Dad... How are you?" He started to walk to where we are and stopped in front of me with both hands inside his pocket.

"I'm fine... I just want to say Congratulations to you Soojung. You did well..." He smiled at me and awkwardly patted my head like a kid. "I.. I was particularly worried when you did that hard jumps but you nailed it.... I'm so proud of you!" I somehow felt an immense joy when Dad said it because I know he means what he said.

He embraced me and patted my back "You take care and your partner..." He took a glance at Amber and my girlfriend bowed at him as respect. Dad released me and held out his right hand to Amber for a hand shake which she took.

"Congratulations Amber Liu, I can see that the program you run for Soojung is effective. Keep up the good work."

"Thank you Mr. Jung.. your daughter is a good skater, you trained her well. I'm just merely following your daughter Jessica's program." Amber answered scratching her neck.

Dad nodded and patted Amber's back like he did to me, a small smile visible on his face. Dad loves hearing it from people, that kind of words because it means he did a good job. "Please take good care of my daughters Ms. Liu... Soojung, always listen to your sister and your partner. And say hi for me to your sisters." He tucked a loose strand of my hair behind my ear and gave me a doting smile. Say Hi to my sisters.

My Sisters...

Does it mean he's already acknowledging Dani as his daughter?

"Dad... Don't you want to meet Dani?" He shook his head and caressed my face.

"I'm not worthy enough to meet her. She might be thinking that I'm a bad person for doing it to her mother. I already paid for all the sins I did... we will meet when she's ready to forgive me. For the mean time, take care of your sisters. Give Dani everything that she needs and the love she deserves, I'm just here if you need me. And I want to say sorry to you too Soojung on what I did before, when I went to your apartment. I was just really desperate for Suzy to win in the competition, and I was afraid your knee hasn't healed properly. But you proved them wrong and I'm so proud of you."

I chuckled at him when I heard him say take care of my sisters "Dad... I'm the middle child but you talk to me like I'm the oldest of us three! You can tell it to Unnie.."

Dad laughed softly and smiled at me "Because you're more matured than your Sooyeon unnie in some aspects of life but she raised you well. I know you will take care of them."

He gave me another powerful hug making me remember moments like this when I was young and all I do is train with him. "Happy Holidays Dad..."

"Happy Holidays Soojung... Say Happy birthday for me to Dani on Christmas Eve... Good bye.." he kissed my cheek and gave me another squeeze before releasing me. How I wish he's really a change man now... It's not too late Dad..

He went on to Amber and they shook hands again "Thank you Amber, take care of my Soojung. I'll see you two in Helsinki." Amber bowed to him and he nodded at us and turned his back walking away to the other side.

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Jessica's POV

I've been taking care of these 4 teens for almost two weeks and I already ran out of ideas on what to cook for them tonight. Soojung called me excitedly yesterday from their hotel room the night after her competition telling me she won again and they will be home soon. I'm so proud of her and what she has achieved, and I'm grateful to Amber for not leaving my sister alone while competing.

And it seems like they had their own after party judging from the looks of Soojung while talking to me via FaceTime. Her hair looks like she just got up from bed all disheveled wearing just a bathrobe and her lips all red and swelling maybe from all the biting. She was sitting on their bed and she showed me a sleeping Amber all bundled up in the sheets with mouth hanging, only her face showing.

"Is that rice on your neck?!"

"We had sushi for dinner..." She winked at me and I got what she said.

I reminded her to put on her face mask if she goes out, and wear a turtleneck because it's all obvious. She just smirked evily and meronged at me.

She's all grown up now and capable of making decisions for herself and our family. And someday, for her own family with Amber. Oh my God... And now I have Dani to guide too. She's still a teen, so many things to experience and accomplish.

I gave her and Jackson the permission to date exclusively but with conditions. Since she's still grounded for 40 days (I was serious when I said I added 10 days) she can't go out of the house or go anywhere. It just university and house for her, she will either go home with me or with Soojung and Amber. They cannot go on dates and if ever I permit them, they will need a chaperone. I won't take a chance to leave them alone again! They are teenagers with raging hormones! I know the feeling... Been there, done that.

If Jackson will visit her in the house, they can only stay in the living area or at the backyard always surrounded by people. They cannot be left alone and they can't go at the 2nd floor where the rooms are located.

So now we're here in the Sports bar having dinner with my friends. I'm with Sooyoung, Yoona, and Tiffany on a separate table while the four of them are two tables away from us with Jackson as additional sitting beside my sister having a good time. Their hands intertwined under the table while Dani is laughing to whatever Do-yeon was saying.

I noticed Jackson was looking at her, and if I'm not mistaken - it was the same look Amber gives to Soojung whenever my sister is busy being her weirdo self. Kids.. tsk tsk tsk...

"I can't believe it... Dani and Jackson." Soo blurted out absentmindedly while looking at the table where my wards are.

"Me too.. Jackson the noisy kid before is now that guy sitting beside your sister Jessica. Tsk tsk tsk..." Fany threw a piece of brocolli to Yoona when she heard it.

I just smiled and shook my head also looking at the two youngsters, I saw how Jackson served food to my sister even shoving fries to my sisters mouth earning an elbow on his chest. The three other girls laughing at him. Yep, definitely a Jung.

"Yah! That's my brother you're talking about! He's not the same kid anymore... He's already grown up and mature in his age. I'm just thankful he didn't grew up to be a pain in the and he studies well." Fany smiled wistfully while looking at her brother. "If Mom and Dad are just here, they will be proud of him."

I reached for Fany's arm and gave it a light squeeze. She was always like this when she remembers their parents, they died when Fany was still in High School due to a plane crash. They were heading to the US aboard their private plane when it crashed in the sea. That left Fany and her still young brother Jackson orphans at such a young age.

Their parents left them a fortune, making Fany a heiress but instead of taking over their company she went on and studied medicine to become a doctor. She still seats on the board and I learned from Soo that when Jackson turned 18, he was given the opportunity to seat on the board and show his potential. It seems that the young Hwang got his business thinking skills from their father because after finishing college there's a possibility that he will be the next CEO of their company but Fany said he declined it too.

She said her brother opted to remain in the board and pursue his dreams of becoming a professional hockey player in the future. That's why he was training and practicing so hard on the rink.

"I almost killed him that morning when I saw them together in the bed. Your brother is lucky we didn't destroy his face. If Soojung didn't intervene, he's already bald now." I glared at Fany giving me her famous eyesmile.

I heard Yoona chuckled mumbling "Bald from your wrath or bald from Dani's hair pulling when they did it..."

"Im Yoona!!! You alligator pig!"

"Zipped!" She made a zipping motion in smiling at me.

"And now the Jung's and the Hwang's are already one! How sweet!" I smacked Sooyoung's head spilling her Diet Coke on her button down shirt.

"That's what you get for being silly. They're just dating, not getting married! You walking stick!"

"But your sister is so pretty Jessica.." Fany paused and her eyes became small while biting her lips, probably a bad idea popping out of her mind. "Why don't we arrange them to be married? I won't mind, I've known you for so long and meeting your sister and knowing her that morning she's very nice and polite. What do you say Jung Sooyeon?"

"Yeah! Just marry them off to each other! Remember Jackson already scored the goal.. what if she gets pregnant?! " I kicked Sooyoung under the table making her crumble on her seat.

"She's not pregnant!" I hissed at them at my lowest voice but loud enough for Dani to hear it because she glared at me and covered her face with her hair embarassed. I flicked Fany's forehead earning a slap on my arms from her "Ouch!"

"Fany are you really sure?? You want your brother to die in Jessica and Soojung's hands?"

"You can hurt him but you can't kill him Sooyeon. Do we have a deal?" Fany raised her pinky on me jokingly and I accepted it wrapping my pinky on hers.

"If it already came from you Hwang Miyoung, then we have a deal." We sealed our promise and laughed at our childishness. "But about the marriage part, it's all up to them. All we can do is support and guide them... My Dani is still young, Jackson said he'll wait until she finish her studies."

"You two sounds like 2 ahjummas striking a deal.." Sooyoung snorted at us. I poked her sides trying to shut her up. She just grinned at me tilting her head like a kid.

We chatted a bit more then Taeyeon came rushing because she's late again. I told them what happened with my lunch date with Donghae's wife Dara, and how the made a lie again even if he's already busted. Sooyoung said she didn't​ knew about the doctor Donghae told me but whoever that doctor is she's unlucky.

Tae and Fany announced to us that they already did the procedure and Taeyeon's fertilized egg is already planted inside her. She's 3 weeks pregnant now! I can see how happy they are by the way Tae embrace Fany with lots of love and protection. They deserve this, my friends will be good parents I know it. I leaned my head on Sooyoung's shoulder like I always do while looking at how excited my friends are and how Yoona tells us that she's going to propose on Christmas day to Seohyun.

I noticed the stain on Sooyoung's white shirt, I don't know why but I took a side glance at my best friend looking at her side profile. Even though she's a bit stressed in the hospital, she still looks... beautiful.

Her brown hair tied in a low pony tail showing her long smooth neck, I don't know why but I suddenly swallowed an invisible lump on my throat that made me straightened on my seat surprising Sooyoung. She spilled her soda again on her shirt flicking my huge forehead.

"Sorry Dr. Choi! Here, let me help you.." I took the tissue Yoona gave me trying to wipe the stain on her shirt. Eh... Why is her bra black? I shook my head trying to shake away the negative erted thoughts on my head.

Oh my God!

Jessica Jung!

You have erted thoughts towards your best friend?!?

"Yah! Duckface! Are you feeling me up?! You're wiping the wrong spot." I looked at her and to the spot i'm wiping. Oh... Yeah the area around her stomach is dry.

Why did my hand travelled unconsciously on top of her stomach?!

I threw the tissue at her face faking annoyance "I'm not filling you up! Walking stick! I thought it's also wet..."

Yoona cleared tapping Sooyoung and me "Soo... Let's go to the bathroom, do you have any spare clothes?"

"Yes I have... I'll just go to my car and get my spare clothes because the Ice Queen spilled soda on my favorite shirt!" I laughed at Sooyoung's mad glare at me. I wrapped my arms on her sides and I felt her body stiffened a bit, then returned to her normal self. "Get your arms away from me duckface!"

She stood up swatting my arms lightly and held my hands, crossing it and tucking below my armpit. "Keep that hands to yourself and be a good girl Jessica, okay~?" When she turned her back on me, I realized the shirt she's wearing was the one I gave her when I went back from the States.

Tae was telling some story about one of her cases when I had the urge to go to the bathroom. Soo and Yoona hasn't come back from outside. I excused myself and went to the bathroom, passing through on the teens table and smacking Jackson's head on the way when I saw his hands sliding on my sister's waist.

Ugh. Menstrual cramps really makes me weak. I thought to myself while sitting in the bowl. I wanna snuggle in my bed with my pillow and just curl to sleep.

I heard someone opening the door of the bathroom and it was Soo and Yoona hissing at each other. Looks like Soo is being nagged by Yoona about something. I was going to stand up when I heard Yoona ask Sooyoung in a questioning way that I remain seated. Because if I stand up, the bowl will flush automatically.

"When are you going to tell her about your feelings? It's been what, almost half of our lives Soo!" It was Yoona and it made me curious on what they are talking about.

I heard Soo sighed and went inside the cubicle beside mine "Yoon, even if I tell her what I feel it's no use. It's better this way, we don't have any awkward moments when we're together."

"So what happened earlier--"

"Just forget it Yoon~... Don't push me to make myself look stupid."

Who are they talking about?

Maybe Soo has a special someone now. But she's not saying anything to me about who it is. A fellow doctor? A former classmate in Med school?

"Dr. Choi Sooyoung! Why are you doing this to yourself?! Just say it, tell her!" The door beside me opened, maybe Soo already finished changing her clothes.

"Tell Jessica what?" I froze in the bowl hearing my name being uttered by Soo.

"Hahaha... Tell her that I've been in love with her since we were 15? That I cried myself to sleep when she and Donghae became an item back in our Junior year? Tell her that I was so sad when she went overseas to study? Tell her that I'm still hopelessly in love with her after all these years..." I bit my lips suppressing myself not to stand up, and closed my eyes.

Choi Sooyoung.... What is this craziness?!

"Yes, why the hell not!"

"Yoon... It's better like this. Jessica needs me as her best friend, and that's how she sees me. Nothing more, nothing else."

"Aisssh! I can't understand you Soo!"

Sooyoung chuckled and laughed softly, but from the way her voice sound there's a tinge of sadness on it.
"I love her, I love Jessica Jung. But that's it, I'm not asking for anything else. All I want for her is to be happy."

Something wet dropped on my hands and when I opened my eyes, I felt my cheeks are also wet.

I'm crying?!

"Even if your own happiness is at stake?"

There was a pause, my heart anticipating her answer.

Soo... All these years? Why? Why didn't you tell me before?

"She is my happiness, and if I tell her what I feel that's the time I lose my happiness."