She walked through the darkness of the night, heading forward and never looking back. It was late and the only lights were coming from the streetlamps that lined the sidewalk, casting long shadows all over the ground. Jia breathed in the fresh spring air and stretched her arms out above her head as she walked through the park. She made this walk every night to clear her mind from all the psycho’s she had to deal with during the day. Something about walking in the empty night was relaxing, especially when it was a nice night out.

As she neared the end of the path that she was walking on, the bridge came into sight. At the end of her walks she would lean on the wall and stare out at the moonlight and just let her mind empty of all thoughts. Unfortunately when she neared it, Jia saw that she would not be there alone tonight. Not wanting to share her alone time, she was about to turn around and go back home when she realized the person there was sitting on the ledge, peering down below. Something set off in the back of her mind and told her not to walk away.

As she strolled over, she saw that it was a teen boy, and not only that, she recognized him as Kibum, the kid that Heechul kept coming to talk about. Psychiatrist instinct taking over, she carefully approached him, not wanting to scare him and make him fall. It was a long fall and the river below was not very deep and full of rocks; he’d die instantly.

“Hey,” Jia said casually, coming to a stop beside Kibum. When he didn’t even acknowledge her presence, Jia knew that he wasn’t sitting there staring out for the hell of it; he was going to jump. She carefully moved her hand over to touch his arm, but he jerked himself away from her.

“Go away,” He whispered.

“I can’t do that. You’re Kibum, aren’t you? I’m Jia, Heechul is my friend. I don’t think he would be too happy if he found out that you were going to kill yourself,” Jia told him. She saw his eyes well up with tears but his eyes looked angry. Now he was listening to her, which was good because if she kept talking then he was going to keep listening and not jump.

“Leave me alone,” Kibum said, wrapping his arms around his body. Jia froze when he moved suddenly, thinking he was about to jump, but he only scooted away from her. She sighed in relief but didn’t move closer to him; if she swarmed him then he was just going to get annoyed. She knew that she had to do this slow and calmly or else he wasn’t going to listen.

“You know, when I was fourteen I tried to jump off a bridge too,” Jia told him. Hearing this, Kibum slowly turned his head and stared at her curiously and she continued on. “I felt so alone at that time and no one was around for me to talk to, so I thought I would just make everything stop and take the pain away myself; so I jumped off a bridge,” She said.

“What happened?” Kibum asked quietly, wanting to know how it ended since she was obviously still there. Jia paused for a moment and thought about that time in her life. The whole thing was what made her mind up to become a psychiatrist.

“Well, the water was deep so all I did was basically cannon-ball off the side of the bridge and face plant into the water; and it hurt like hell. But my mother saw me from the kitchen window and completely flipped out thinking that I was dead. When she came running over crying her heart out I realized that I was being completely selfish. If I took my life away then I was taking part of hers, because I was her world,” Jia said, frowning slightly because she realized that Kibum couldn’t exactly relate to it probably.

Kibum lowered his head slightly and closed his eyes wondering how Heechul would feel knowing that he’d killed himself.  Or how about Donghae and Mir? They would probably live the rest of their lives wondering why he did it and ask themselves why they weren’t good enough for him. He knew at least Donghae would think that, because he’d said it at least twice to him before.  But Kibum knew that all in all, they would be sad. He loved his family so much, could he honestly jump down now knowing that they were going to be hurting? Hurting the way he’d felt when Dayeun died? Could he really put them through that?

But on the other hand…

He couldn’t take it anymore. While the love from his family made things better, Kibum couldn’t deny the amount of pain that kept following him. It was as if he had his own personal rain cloud that followed him everywhere. No matter how hard he tried to be happy, the hurt always seemed to take control. No matter what choice he made he wasn’t go