"Unfortunate"

 

 

I frowned at the news broadcasted on the TV, there were several new stuffs in this world happened while the value of my company’s stocks priced up. Chen gathered some information for me and based on his presentation regarding the increase of my stocks value; it’s somehow related with the news of my marriage and the stability of it.  Funny, how something that I thought was disaster for me turned to be something that helped me survive. And I heard that Jinah was actually doing the same with her career. All of the brands she’s been promoting during her pregnancy, including the baby meal set and even the feed tools, reached its highest selling since it’s launching, which was just merely two months. And for that, Jinah kept being contacted for more promotions.  The bad news turned into good news.

Moving from the table, I walked to the island in the kitchen to prepare my own morning coffee. All the maids who served breakfast for me knew already that I didn’t order coffee from them. It’s always whole grain bread along with the jam or some cereal with milk, all paired with a glass of water, but never tea or coffee; because I ordered it that way.

Different from Jinah’s breakfast set that could at least feed three people, I remained simple with some salad and bread or simply anything boiled. But for the coffee, I have some specially ordered coffee for my health; it’s like organic coffee to help my blood circulation. And I always love to prepare it on my own. Maybe it’s used to be my habit when I was living alone that I could do anything on my own, so preparing a coffee by myself was not something new for me; even though people out there always thought that me, Kris Wu, never done anything in my life except for giving order and being served by the maids. People love to create things on their own and somehow, spread it as rumor.

I was brewing the coffee when I noticed her presence. It’s been always like this, me waking up earlier than her while she’s still on the bed, enjoying the sleep she’s hardly gets. We got adjusted to sleep on the same bed and even though we’re never talked about the night we spent together, when the hot make out session involved, we pretty much enjoyed each other’s company. And for some reasons, I just want to keep it that way. I like waking up with her by my side, and I’m happy that she ran to me whenever she couldn’t sleep because the baby kept kicking on her. He’s somehow always being active at night, the time when his parents need to rest the most. Now I understand what people said about making love, not a baby.

As usual, Jinah looked flawless even though she’s not yet taking a bath and she basically just woke up and walked directly to the kitchen before she could really open her eyes fully while holding on Mr. Teddy, a small brown bear doll, the tiny version of the one on the baby’s room. She loved the big one, but since it’s not feasible to be taken when she wanted to sleep with a doll in her hand, I decided to just buy the small one for her company. She got used to the doll and somehow brought it everywhere she goes.

She wandered around the kitchen with my shirt on her. She still couldn’t let the habit of using my shirt, just to smell me. That’s sounded so , seriously, but the way she pleaded to get my shirt every time I went back from the office always successfully made me agree to give the shirt to her. It’s dirty, since I’ve been using it all day, but Jinah wouldn’t listen and just wore it on the top of her short and tank top. She’s really looked like a ball currently, with her belly stood up more than any part of her body. And it’s nice to about that, a good laugh once in a day keep the doctor away.

“What are you looking for?” I asked her when Jinah, with her eyes half opened, walked to the fridge. She opened it and hugged the door of the fridge, sleepy.

“Kyungsoo… He gave something, right?” she asked with her hoarse voice. I recalled last night Kyungsoo sent a pack of his homemade vegetable sushi for Jinah but since she felt full already, I told the maid to put it on the fridge.

“Why? Do you want it now?”

She nodded as she rubbed her eyes. “I’m hungry” she shortly said before she found the package Kyungsoo left for her, the sushi she had been craving for. It’s all cold, but she still looked excited to eat the sushi when she dipped it deeply to the soy sauce and ate with a huge appetite. I took a glass of water for her, watching her eating as she sat on the stool next to me. I sipped my coffee while waiting for her to finish her packed sushi, checking on my schedule.

“This is really good” she said when she’s done with the food, giving her satisfied smile.

“Just call Kyungsoo and order it again”

“Definitely… You’re up so early anyway” she said, checking on my attire. I’m already ready for my work, except for my suit that’s still hanging on the chair.

“Let me see, Ma’am” I looked at my watch and stared at her. “Well, 8.30 doesn’t sound like early for me, it’s considered a little late”

“I never work at 8.30, it’s my time to sleep, but surely I’ve been worked up to 8.30 in the morning” she commented, shrugging as she gulped the water. I chuckled as I placed my palm above her head and played with her loose hair. She just smiled to herself, gulping more water on her own.

“Can I smell you?” she asked me suddenly, looking at the fold between my chest and my upper arms. I walked closer to her and faced her. It seemed like even though she wore my clothes, she still couldn’t get over my scent. It’s really amazing for me, since this is the first time I knew someone who’s having a weird craving during her pregnancy. It wasn’t like I’m being proud of that; but if what people said was true, that what the mother did reflect what the baby wanted then I’m happy to say that my baby indeed wanted me, his father, to be around him.

Jinah softly clutched her hand on my shoulder and on my waist as she drowned her face around the armpit area, sniffing it. It’s so funny to see her like that, she always looks like she wanted to hold on her feeling but whenever she sniffed me, she immediately becoming a little out of control. It happened for several days now, the fact that she always half hugging me while sniffing on my scent and somehow, we both got used to it. And in the middle of this “sniffing” activity, we usually have a chat about our day. What a way of communication we had here….

“Do you have any plan today?” I asked her, caressing the back of her hair again. I love the feeling of her hair, it’s so soft and the rose shampoo she used always left some nice scent there. Secretly, I’ve smelled her hair when she’s sleeping with Mr. Teddy on her arm. 

She nodded, pulling herself closer to my chest. “I have to attend the lunch event, held by your mother’s friends, and after that I’ll visit the hospital, checkup”

“Do you want me to accompany you to the hospital?” I asked her. Aside from the fact that she’s keen on getting close to me, I think I have this habit to accompany her everywhere. Even when we’re at home, we usually stick together so I basically just want to stay near her.    

“No, I’ll be going with your mother…” she answered as she took a step back from me, looking at me with her pretty eyes. She played with the part of shirt that’s tuck into my pants. She adjusted it and tucked more of the shirt inside, since it’s been pulled by her earlier.  

“Everything is good?”

“Yes, it’s fine. I’m just having my checkup, no need to worry about anything” she replied, smiling.

“I should be going” I said as I checked on the time. I have a morning meeting and I’m already prepared for it, so I have to be on time for the meeting even though a minute or two talking with her was somehow more interesting than talking about investment. “Let me know your health progress and the baby condition, hmm?”

She nodded. “I will…”

Jinah watched me as I finished my coffee and when I’m done with it, I wiped my lips with the napkins before I softly caressed her hair and kissed her forehead. I knew this is not the first time I kissed her forehead, but again, I felt a little hilarious feeling on my chest. It’s like an excited feeling of doing something that I like… It’s like when I heard about the stock raised higher, or like when the hotel got more recognition year by year, but this feeling, it felt better than anything else. And this morning, I felt like kissing her a little longer. So as I planted a kiss on her forehead, I pulled her closer to me as she automatically hugged my waist. It was serene and calm until I heard a very familiar voice calling on my name.

“Did I interrupt something here?”

My mother stood up at the entrance of our dining room along with her assistant who just smile shyly as I looked at them. Jinah and I quickly pulled away from each other; her, gulping on the water while me, I cleared my throat several times. It wasn’t like I got caught on doing something improper with my girlfriend, but somehow, being a little close to Jinah and got seen like that was intrigued me.

“You’re so early here” I commented, leaving Jinah on her seat while I took my suit and wore it.

“I thought that it’d be nice to pick up my daughter in law for a lunch invitation, rather than just meet at the place… Had a great night?” she replied while she sat on the chair. I came to her, giving her a hug and got her kissed my cheek.

“I passed out last night” I responded. It’s true though; I was working on my project and fell asleep on my desk as I tried to finish it. When I was awakened with my laptop on and piles of paper spread out on the carpet, I moved to the bed, joining Jinah who’s already sleeping. To be honest, I didn’t know what my mother intention on asking how my night was; but as I saw her gave a glance to Jinah who was somehow looked blushed; I knew what she meant now.

“Aren’t you supposed to come before lunch? It’s too early”

“I haven’t come to your house lately; I just want to spend more time with Jinah. We have few things to be talked” my mom said as she glanced to Jinah who’s walking towards her seat 

“It’s true what people said about you” my mother said as she softly caressed Jinah’s hair. “I kept listening to people telling me that you looked beautiful, despite your growing belly. Are you okay?” my mother asked her, patted her bump with care.

“I’m fine, Mother” she replied.

“I brought you some supplement and herbs, to help you strengthen your pregnancy. How’s my future grandson doing? Is he behaves well?”

To be honest, this is the first time I saw my mom got excited about something. Anything business related, as expected, must be excited her; but other than that, she’s never looked interesting towards anything. So to see her excitedly asked Jinah about her pregnancy and talked comfortably about the baby’s growth, I felt kind of surprised but relieved at the same time. Jinah usually always have her mother to talk about her pregnancy but seeing her responded well to my mother, I have to say that I’m happy about that. I noticed that from the very first time, Jinah and my mother didn’t have a good relationship; with the pregnancy and marriage news, both of them seemed to be after each other, so having them chatted closely about her condition and what to do when she couldn’t sleep at night due to her pregnancy truly made me feel like at last, these two have something in common.

“Not going to interrupt you two, but I have a meeting to attend so I have to go” I said as I waved to both of them.

“No goodbye kiss?” my mother asked.

I sighed and walked to my mother’s side, but all she did was moving away from me.

“Your child’s mother first, Son” she said as she patted my shoulder and left me awkwardly bend my body towards Jinah. She looked surprised also with what my mother said and just glanced at me in confused. I cupped her right face and kissed her forehead quickly before I kissed my mother’s cheeks and left the house.

I didn’t know why I felt so nervous after leaving the room.

And I still could feel my heart beat so fast whenever I recalled Jinah’s expression.

 

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“Sleep, Su Ah”

Woobin oppa sternly said as he read his newspaper, maintain a straight look to all the news there. I clutched my pillow tighter and moved to my side, still looking at him, ignoring the fact that the IV fluid that’s connected to my right arm was kind of pulled. Woobin oppa noticed it, leaving his newspaper, and corrected the position of it, checking on my arm.

“Doctor said you should stop moving too much” he said before sitting next to me again.

“But it’s boring to lie down just like that”

“That’s why sick is annoying” he commented shortly and checked on his phone.

For the first time in my experience being admitted to the hospital, I felt happy that I have to be hospitalized. This was happened a day before when I visited Woobin oppa in his office and he got me waited for more than five hours since he’s having his meeting instead of going for a lunch like he promised me. I kept waiting for him until I fainted, for I haven’t eaten anything.

He’s been patiently waiting for me, even spent a night here in the hospital and took a day off. I didn’t know that he felt that guilty towards my condition that he gave up his working day just to look for me. And this was somehow made me a little grateful that I was faint that day. Who knew the guy who always ignored me would spend his time taking care of me?

“Oppa”

“Hmm”

“Is it okay for you to take a day off? Your father… Isn’t he going to look for you?” I asked him.

“He knew that I’m here with you”

“Will you spend one more night here?”

“Don’t push your luck”

And I just grinned over his reply. I knew he’s going to spend another night here, my mother just texted me that he asked her permission to watch over me. But I just want to hear it from him that he’s going to spend another night waiting for me, that he’s indeed worry about my condition, and that he wouldn’t let me staying alone. I wanted to hear those things right from his mouth, but I know, it would take a little time before that really happened. Having him beside me was already enough, I couldn’t stop thanking God for sending him into my life.

We’ve been good lately. He still ignores me, but at least, we never fought again and he’s somehow spent more time with me. He always took me to every party or exhibition he’s invited and although sometimes we met with Im Jinah and her husband, Kris Wu, I just knew that Woobin oppa didn’t pay attention to her anymore. I couldn’t blame them to be present at those parties since Kris Wu and Woobin oppa’s company worked together for a new project and according to Woobin oppa’s mom, it’s an important work for their company, so even though it’s kind of annoying for me to keep seeing Im Jinah, if it’s for Woobin oppa’s succeed, I could bear it. And the fact that Im Jinah married and pregnant was enough to keep Woobin oppa away from her.

I knew how precious she was for Woobin oppa, but I couldn’t let go the man that I wished to have. Time will heal everything, I believe. Just like me patiently waiting for Woobin oppa to come to me, I just have this feeling that he’s slowly forgetting his ex-girlfriend he loved the most. I was once spotted him accidentally flipped on my magazine and found an article about Im Jinah and her husband, when they’re taking a photo-shoot together. I could say that Im Jinah indeed loves her husband on that photo-shoot. It was like she never had Woobin oppa before she met Kris Wu. And I bet that was one of things that made Woobin oppa realized that the love of his life was not that in love with him.

I didn’t care about Im Jinah though. Whether she’s happy or not, I don’t care. But if her condition mattered to Woobin oppa, then she better be in a well condition. And her current life showed that. I didn’t really know about Kris Wu, but I remembered he used to date one of my friends back in university and if I’m not mistaken, he also dated Choi Sooyoung, the philanthropist, as well. It seemed like his type was just a tall skinny girl. Why guy loves that kind of woman? No curve to hug.

But anyway, he’s popular to be a very caring husband for Im Jinah. There’re tons of articles published about them whenever the cameras caught them together. And the media couldn’t stop appraising them, like they’re the Brangelina couple. Please, they’re nowhere near that. But I should at least thanked the media for kept publishing their togetherness, Woobin oppa could clearly see how Im Jinah lived her life and how she forgot whatever they used to have together. Means, it’s time for Woobin oppa to accept the reality and move on. And I’ll be there, waiting for him, arms opened.

“Is there anything on my face that makes you couldn’t stop looking at me?” he put away his phone and finally looked at me, the thing that I’ve been waiting for.

“It feels like dream” I said, half giggling.

“What?”

“Seeing you here. Right next to me” I shyly replied. We rarely had a close discussion or anything near “discuss” if it’s not “argue” or “fight”. But to have him here, asking me whether I feel like eating something or not, or just simply asking what I feel, I’m so grateful to finally experience the things that I used to imagine.

“You really should stop watching drama when you’re supposed to sleep” he commented as he stood up and stretched his body, facing to the window next to my bed.

Again, I looked at his back view and it’s just…perfect. Woobin oppa is indeed the man of my dream, and I’m sure that I was born to be his other half. He’s the first man I’ve ever love in my life and I don’t think that’d change. I love him, his good side and his bad side, all of it. And there’s nothing he should worry about me, because my feeling for him would always be the same; for now or forever. I’ve always been loyal to him, I never had my feeling swayed so I hope he’d see that and realized that it’s me in the end who will always be for him.

“I need to go out” he said suddenly, right when he turned around.

“Where?” I asked him, but in second, I quickly stammered, afraid that he found me annoying for asking him those kinds of things. I don’t want to be labelled as the annoying girlfriend who always wants to know where her man goes. I don’t want that kind of relationship with Woobin oppa; I want both of us to trust each other. “I m-m-mean, it’s okay if you want to go, you don’t have to tell me, you just-“

“Su Ah” he called my name and I automatically stopped talking and just looked at him.

He smiled. Woobin oppa smiled at me and walked closer to my bed, my eyes kept following him.

“I’ll be back here, but now, I have to go for a meeting. The company still needs me” he said in a reassuring tone. Unknowingly, I just nodded at his words. He affected me a lot; I could only listen to him.

“Don’t forget to take your meals and medicine on time, ok?” he said as he patted on my shoulder softly.

“Mmm. Oppa” I called him as he wore his suit.

“Hmm?”

“Could you please take me to the park?  I want to breathe the fresh air” I asked him.

He looked outside and after considering for a while, he nodded and helped me to sit on the wheelchair. I’m allowed to leave my room once in a day, just to take the air outside. For once, I wanted to feel him pushing on my wheelchair and accompanied me there. But even though today he only could push the wheelchair for me, it’s fine as long as it’s him who did it.

“Ask the nurse to take you back to your room. I’ll be back around dinner time. But this time, Su Ah, if you feel like eating, just eat first and don’t wait for me. Okay? I don’t want you to get sick again…” Woobin oppa said before he left me in the middle of the park.

I smiled to him and nodded, waving at him when he left. Oh so this is the feeling, when you say goodbye to the person whom you love and waiting patiently for his comeback. It felt so beautiful and I couldn’t wait to feel it again. I smiled to myself as I watched his back slowly disappearing as he walked to the building.

“Did you see her? Oh, she is so beautiful!”

“She’s one lucky woman. She got a handsome husband and it’s the rich one! She’s so lucky”

I turned to my left when I heard two nurses on their free time enjoying their afternoon snacks while gossiping. I’m not interested with what they’re talking about, until the word “Im Jinah” slipped between them.

“I swore she just looked effortlessly beautiful on her pregnancy dress and she’s so kind, she kept smiling to people who greet her” the nurse with bun in her hand said.

“You know what? It’s the pregnancy glow that made her looked like that, I’m sure” said the other nurse, munching on her taco.

“Agree. With a husband like Kris Wu, why wouldn’t Mrs. Wu glowing in her pregnancy? They must have been experiencing a good life, I bet. I mean, Kris Wu! He’s basically on legs!” she said excitedly and the two giggles as they might imagine something. 

“The baby must have been adorable, the mix of Kris Wu and Im Jinah. I couldn’t wait to see it” the nurse said again. And they continued to chat about other celebrity’s couple who’s waiting their baby born. That’s enough to ruin my afternoon mood.

Suddenly I felt worry all over again.

I have so much bad thought right now about the reason why Woobin oppa left. I felt that it’s somehow related with Im Jinah. What if he left because he knew that she’s here? What if he left because he wanted to see her? How it’d be coincidence that her presence here is the same day when Woobin oppa left for the meeting? I felt so suffocated.

I could only impulsively bite my nail while looking around. I really wish my body is strong enough to stand up and look for him getting into his car and left the hospital without meeting Im Jinah. I just need to be sure that they’re not together right now…

I really could only pray that Woobin oppa didn’t see Im Jinah.

 

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“Hyung”

I sighed when I heard the voice across the phone. “What is it now, Sung Joon?” I answered as I walked out from the elevator, right to the main gate of the hospital.

“Where are you now?”

“In the hospital”

I could hear a gasp coming out from Sung Joon. He’s the one who always made weird voices or expression, if he didn’t remain stoic as a stone.

“No way. You waited for her?”

“Yes, Sung Joon. I waited for her” I confirmed him. Sung Joon let out a chuckle and I bet he shook his head now.

“Are you finally in love with Hwang Su Ah or what? The last time I recalled, you hate her” he said.

“Feeling guilty” I corrected his words.

“Don’t you think you’re being cruel here? You’re being nice to her while in the end you just want to propose to end your stupid marriage arrangement. You will only hurt her in the end” he commented.

“Ok, said the cold-blooded playboy here…”

“Don’t put your situation the same with me, Hyung” Sung Joon said. “I was never good with relationship, with women. But you’re not, and I know you must be feeling a little guilty towards her for doing this”

“Because even if I kept pushing her away from me, she still didn’t want to end this engagement, so I think the best way probably is just by dropping the bomb right on time” I said to him, stopping my steps.

“Are you sure? It was just because you don’t like her and not because you’re still not over Im Jinah right, Hyung?”

I left Sung Joon hanging on the line since I suddenly saw Jinah right in front of the hospital, waiting for the car to pick her up, I guess. She looked pretty on her blue dress and cardigan, warm enough to protect her from the wind outside. Winter is just getting colder lately. I noticed her big bump appeared from behind the dress, showing her growing pregnancy.

“Hyung?” I noticed Sung Joon was calling me again. “Hyung, are you still there?”

“Let’s talk again later, ok? I need to drive. Just meet later tonight?” I suggested to him.

“Ok. I’ll let Soohyuk hyung knows”

“Ok, sure. Bye”

I put back my phone on my pocket and walked pass the main glass sliding door of the hospital; in seconds, I was in the same open space with Jinah. It’s been awhile since I meet her and even though I promised not to meddle in her way anymore, just to greet her was not prohibited in our current relationship. So I made my way to her side and softly greeted her. As expected, she looked surprised and a bit jumpy once she heard me calling her name.

“Oh, Oppa… You’re in the hospital also?” she asked when she learned that I came from inside the hospital.

“Well, yes. Visiting a friend”

For some reason I felt comfortable not mentioning Su Ah here. It’s for both of our good.

“Are you alone? Isn’t it a little dangerous for pregnant woman to walk on her own?”

She shook her head. “I came with my mother in law earlier, but since she needs to go first so she left and I waited for my driver to pick me up”

And I guess that’s the end of our conversation. I couldn’t say anything and she didn’t ask me anything also, and in the end the conversation was stopped just like that. She glanced at me while I stole a glance at her also, but we didn’t say anything. Ex-lovers were never really meant to be a good friend in the end, I guess.

“Well, okay then. I need to go for a meeting. See you around, Jinah” I said, nodding at her.

“Take care, Oppa” she said, nodding back at me.

I continued to walk to the parking lot. Since I came quiet early yesterday, I left my car right in front of the hospital. It’s for easy access too, of course. I sat on my car, turned the engine as I waited to heat it up. The weather lately was as cold as early winter; it’s been hard for people as well as for cars. Once I think the car was ready, I started to drive it around the parking lot and just before I go straight to the exit gate, I turned around and stopped right in front of Jinah, making her looked confused upon seeing my black E class.

I walked out from the car and came closer to her, she gave me her ‘what-are-you-doing’ look but I didn’t care. I couldn’t let her stand up like that waiting for the car to pick her up. Kris Wu needs to train his personal chauffer to be on time to pick up the lady of the family, I bet.

“Tell me where you’re heading to, I’ll drive you there” I told her as I opened the front door. Jinah stayed still on her position, kept looking at me in confused.

“Oppa, what are you doing?”

“Just cancel your car and told the chauffer to see you at the place you’re going to visit”

“Oppa”

“Just for this one time, Jinah. Let me help you” I looked at her and I knew right when she sighed and took her phone, she’s considering to take my offer. I have no bad intention; I just want to help her, really.

She made a quick call before in the end agreed to get in to my car. Once I closed the door and ready to drive, I smiled to her. I didn’t even know why I did that, maybe just to make her sure that I’m no harm for her. I knew I acted like idiot, but I couldn’t help to smile when I saw her so close to me. I never went angst over her marriage anymore, but it’s just… I truly felt happy for having her here.

It’s been awhile since she sat next to me while we drove around the city. I usually picked her up a little late after her schedule where we would go for a quick wine or maybe a late night snack, before in the end sending her to her own apartment. We usually talk about our day or simply just catching up with whatever we’re doing or kissing and cuddling. I missed having her around me, to get her hugging my back or me hugging her before she slept and I would silently left her apartment. I really could go crazy with these memories about her in me.

“Where are you going?” I asked her.

“To Kris’ place” she shortly answered, remained her look straight to the road.

“His hotel?”

She nodded quickly.

“We have the same destination” I said, making her looked at me. “I know what you’re worrying about. I’ll drop you first, after that I’ll park the car on the parking lot. We’re not going to be seen coming together, I promise you”

“It wasn’t like we’re doing something illegal though” she commented, leaning to the window. I chuckled and nodded.

“Did you just having your checkup?” I asked her.   

“Hmm”

“How is it?”

“Good”

And we fell into the silence again. I found that it’s harder to build a conversation with her now that she’s married and getting pregnant, it was really felt that we never existed before, that she met Kris from the very first time and fell in love and the rest is history.

“Does he feeling excite to have a baby?” I asked out of the blue. Once I realized my weird question, Jinah was found looking at me like she couldn’t believe I asked about that.

“Don’t try to ask a question you don’t want to listen to the answer, Oppa” she said.

“I’m curious. That’s all”

“Don’t be”

And we really ended our conversation. The rest of the trip heading to the W Hotel only filled with the classical music that’s being played inside the car and somehow I couldn’t say anything towards her; Jinah herself just plainly looking to the road outside, when the Seoul roads weren’t that busy. I think this was just really the end of us, there’s nothing to be saved anymore. But at least I still enjoyed the moment she sat still on her seat during the trip to her husband’s place.

Right when we saw the W Hotel logo, it’s the sign for her to get ready. I noticed how her cheeks, arms, and legs looked swollen due to the pregnancy, but for me, she’s still the most beautiful woman I ever met in my life. I stopped the car right on the main gate and she said her thanks before leaving my car. I just smiled and nodded to her before I continued to drive to the parking lot; I still have to meet her husband though for a project meeting.

I still sat on the car though, relaxing myself for half hour since the meeting would be held in another fifteen minutes. I loved her scent that’s still left inside my car and I didn’t wish for it to vanish yet. Years not seeing her, she maintained to have the same scent. And I couldn’t really tell whether I have move on or not. Every time I took four steps away from her, she’s three steps closer to me than ever. And I thought that I was already over her.

I just really wish that everything was just a dream.

 

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“What do you want to eat?”

“Anything” I mindlessly answered.

“What do you want to drink?”

“Anything”

My second answers successfully gained Kris attention and he looked straightly at me while I tried to read the menu that’s offered in the restaurant.

“Are you okay?”

I gasped a little when I felt his palm against my forehead. It wasn’t as surprising as his kiss there, but still, everything he did around me made me a little jumpy today. And that made him curious, for sure.

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m fine”

“You don’t look fine to me” he responded while kept looking at me, but since I didn’t say anything he just sighed and made the order before looking at me again.

“Jinah, seriously, please tell me. Is there anything wrong? Is there anything you don’t like?” he asked me again.

“No, Kris. It’s just… I’m not in the mood”

Yeah, the mood. I could blame on that and no one would try to mess with me.

Kris gave up and sat back on his seat again, checking on his phone. Without me knowing, he just called my doctor and right in front of me, he asked about my condition.

“Is she okay? Is there anything wrong with her mood?” he asked the doctor. I just could roll my eyes and folded my arms when he asked those things. He didn’t take my words seriously.

“Ok, I see. Anyway, is it okay for her current condition to go abroad?”

I looked at him in surprised. We’re going abroad? When? Where?

“Ok, sure. Yes, I’ll make sure about it. Ok, thanks for you information, Doc. Have a good day” he ended the call and put his phone back to his pocket, now that he changed his attention to his iPad, intentionally making me curious about the trip he’s talking about.

“We’re going to Guangzhou in three days” he said suddenly, without looking at me.

“Why?”

“It’s the commemoration of my father’s death, all family members must have been there. And now that you’re registered as my wife, you should be coming” he explained coldly.

I sighed and couldn’t say anything. This is my fault from the very start that I tried to ignore him but to think about it again… I didn’t mean it. I mean… I lied to him! I lied right in front of his face and for that lie I couldn’t say anything but being ignorant.

Kris Wu, this man, he had done so many things to protect me and the baby. But all I could do to him was… lying. 

Earlier when I’ve just arrived at the hotel, I saw him in the lobby and he greeted me nicely. Everything went fine until he asked me how I get there because as supposedly arranged, I should be coming along my mother in law. Somehow I couldn’t tell the truth that Woobin oppa took me there instead of the driver and after that, I didn’t feel okay. I felt like I’ve been betrayed him by lying and that I was so cruel over a man who’s being nice to me, who care for me. So in the end, I started to create a space between me and him again, while I thought we’re already close. But now that he started to speak coldly towards me, I felt guilty and I…. I really have no idea on what to do…

When the food came, we just had the dinner without exchanging any words and went back home. He didn’t say anything on the trip from the restaurant to our house; he went to his bathroom to take a bath while I went to my own and started to clean up. I thought that once I took a bath everything would be okay, but when I started to clean my face from the makeup, I somehow started to sob and felt so hurt inside my heart. It felt like no matter I’d do, Kris wouldn’t be nice to me anymore. It felt like I pushed him away and he followed the game, while truthfully, I didn’t want him to be far from me.

Oh my God, I really hate myself right now!

I kept running back and fro, it felt like I want to be near with him but I want to push him away but I want to keep him too. It’s really crazy and tiring and I just…

“Jinah?”

I quickly wiped my tears when Kris suddenly appeared in my room. He already changed his clothes into his comfortable shirt and pants for sleep.

“Hey, tell me what’s wrong?” he asked me while kneeling in front my seat on the vanity table. “Why are you crying?”

I shook my head, trying to tell a short ‘I’m fine’ but my voice was trembling and in the end, I cried again. And Kris tried to stop the tears by kept wiping it with his thumbs, but I really couldn’t stop crying. It’s just… I couldn’t say anything I just want to cry, I just hope he understood that I felt guilty towards him, that this tears was caused by the guilt I have for lying to him.

“It’s okay, Jinah. It’s okay, it’s fine” he said as he softly patted my shoulder and brought me to his arms and all I did was crying harder. My big bump prevented me from hugging him tighter, so I just clung to his shoulder while he softly caressed my back and whispered words to calm me down. I didn’t know what I’ve down previously in my life to get this kind of guy to handle me. My y moody characters were somehow made my parents fed up on me and I even fought with some of my close friends because of it too, but Kris…   

“Don’t cry, okay? I understand if you’re not feeling okay or you’re feeling wronged, or maybe I said something that made you feeling bad? I’m sorry. But please, please, calm down and relax and stop crying, okay?”

I couldn’t believe I listened these words from a guy who was previously fighting with me months ago asking whether the baby inside me was his or not. And even though what happened to me was caused by my inability to be honest to him, I still felt thankful for his presence and his understanding. He matured upon our togetherness and even though it’s hard for me to say, I should admit that I pretty much depend on him. It’s like I couldn’t say a single yes or no without looking at him. But I didn’t regret it, I’m grateful to have a partner like him.  

I started to stop crying while he kept caressing my back and sometimes kissed the side of my head and it just felt calm and peaceful, like there’s nothing could ruin it. I drown my face at the crook of his neck and I made a promise to myself.

I would never lie to you again, Kris. I promise.

 

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Hello.

Long time no see, eh? How are you doing, Guys? I hope you’re all fine because I’m currently was having a bad flu and cough due to fatigue. I went to the hospital and told to get a bed rest. This is the fourth day I spent my day on the bed, but since I felt a little better than the previous three days, I decided to write (my headache gone for long once I started to write. Aha!). And this is the result.

We reached chapter 25 already… I think this is the time to make someone being a couple with someone? Or not? Or… Hehehe.

I tried my best to grow every characters in this story because this is clearly not a Krina-centric story, since the characters in the story helped to explained what happened between these two. I hope this chapter made it for your awaiting upon my new update. I’ve been receiving a lot of walls, messages, and comments just to ask when I will update this story. I won’t forget to update, of course. I tried my best to upload the next chapter as soon as possible. And yes, we’re travelling again… to Guangzhou this time. I hope for people who living there won’t complained me about whatever I wrote about that place later on ;)      

Left me feedback on the comment section, will you? I’d love to know your thought about this chapter and hopefully I could fix anything that you think is lacking from this story. Looking forward to your feedback.

See you!

 

xoxo,

yuriyaa  

 

disclaimer: image is not mine