"Revealed"

 

 

I would wake up feeling dizzy and sore all over my body. I would usually wake up early to take morning jogs around my apartment, and have my breakfast before I get ready for my schedule. But it was unlikely, I felt so lazy and my body slightly felt warm. Maybe I was having a fever after coming home at 3 in the morning for a week straight. Probably my body couldn’t take it anymore since I was deeply sleeping in fatigue every day I came back home. I was still using the t-shirt from the day before, the one that I wore after I finished shooting for a commercial. My yoga pants somehow felt a little tight around my thighs as I stood up from my bed. And that’s when it happened.

I felt like vomiting. Despite my weak body and dizzy head, I got this urge to run to the toilet. And when I finally reached it – after accidentally kicking the edge of my bed, leaving me with a bruised leg- I threw up everything I had on my stomach. Well, I barely had anything though. I recalled, last night I just had garlic bread and drank some tea because I didn’t feel like eating. Even after the shooting I did not eat anything else. I softly touched my stomach, rubbed it several times as I leaned to the toilet’s wall. Maybe I should visit the doctor later on.

Funny thing was I was only having nausea during the morning. After that, my body would feel a lot better and I felt energized to do all of my schedules. Sometimes I felt a bit hyper, I have the urge to do a lot of things and be a little too cheerful (according to my manager). But usually, at the end of the day, I would be seen sulking on my seat at the car while closing my eyes, feeling so dead tired. And that happened almost for two weeks now, but I couldn’t explain what was wrong with my body.

Until I met Sora.

She was the reason why I sat at this bench now, waiting for the nurse to call on my name while I frantically fiddled on my fingers. Panic creeping all over my body and for a few seconds, I even thought that I stopped breathing. What Sora said earlier made me crazy.

I’m pregnant.

Of course I would be. I should have thought about it; on why I suddenly feel nauseated every day, how I suddenly hate the food I like, or when I suddenly become extremely moody and exhausted even for the slightest movement I did. And that all happened after I’d spent a night with that guy. We were stupid that night, driven by lust and just lost in each other. I knew, part of me wanted him that night, but I didn’t realize that we’re not using any protection. And the morning pill I took… I don’t know, maybe it was too late to consume it that day.

I adjusted the mask that was covering my face from my nose up to my chin. Both I and Sora agreed that my presence in the hospital should not be acknowledged by anyone. Seriously, if anyone, especially reporters, knew that I was here in the Woman and Children Area of the hospital, I’d end up in the news and it’d be a total mess; even to think about it made me already giddy. I didn’t think I was ready to pass this news to anyone.

“Jinah, relax” Sora said softly as she held my hands, slowly rubbing it. I held my fingers back to her. I knew she would never leave me; she was currently the sole support I had. The thing that’s happening to me, even though I’m already mature enough to carry a baby, still made me panic, confused, stressed, and of course, clueless.

Last night, before I came here to the OBS/GYN [1], I bought five sets of pregnancy test. I needed to make sure about the result I have here with me, so I was determined to recheck on my result. Whether it was the one from US or Europe or locally made, whether it was made with the highest sensitivity; I didn’t care, I just bought all the kits. I just want to know whether there was a possibility that Sora’s test result was wrong, which I, myself, highly doubt. I just couldn’t accept the reality. But no matter how many times I tested it, the result stayed the same.

“If you see double line formed, it means the result is positive”

I remembered what Sora said and that was exactly what I saw on those pregnancy kits. There was no doubt that I was positively pregnant. I didn’t know what made me so sure that my visit to the OBS/GYN would change anything, like it’d be a miracle if the doctor couldn’t find any sign of pregnancy in me.

“Congratulations, Ma’am. You’re five weeks pregnant.”

That’s all I could hear from the doctor who examined me and after that, I couldn’t hear anything else. I was still lying on the bed while Sora walked with Doctor Seo, her sunbae in the hospital, to the desk and discussed further about me. The nurse helped me to stand up and all I could do was follow Sora.

“Do you have any anaemia, Ma’am?” doctor Seo asked me. I shook my head slowly.

“She looked pale,” doctor Seo told Sora, and I could see Sora looked at me. I didn’t know what to say so I stayed silent.

“It’s her first pregnancy, sunbae. She had quite a bad morning sickness.” Sora answered for me. Doctor Seo nodded and wrote something on the prescription. The nurse came to Doctor Seo’s desk and put an envelope there, while Sora checked up on me and asked whether I was okay or not. I nodded to answer her, just to make her less worried about me.

“Ok, so this is the sonogram result. As you can see here,” Doctor Seo pointed to the sonogram picture in her hand, “there’s a black dot, around 2 millimetres in size. That’s your future baby, Ma’am. If they made it.”

I looked at the doctor in confusion.

“If they made it?” I responded to the doctor’s words.

“Well, the first trimester of pregnancy is one of the most important stages. You’ll feel extreme tiredness, mood changes, and morning sickness; and you still have to do your daily work. So if you’re not paying attention to your body, it will affect the baby. There’s a high chance that your pregnancy wouldn’t last long. But of course, we don’t want that to happen, right? So I prepared you some prescription you should take daily, to help you maintain your pregnancy.” doctor Seo ended her words with an encouraging smile.

“You’ll be fine,” Sora said to me, smiling as she grabbed my hand again.

“You have to take what’s written in there,” doctor Seo handed the prescription, “and this is your sonogram result, Ma’am. Once again, congratulations on your pregnancy” she smiled genuinely.

I muttered a thank you and walked out of the room. It was hard to say that I was fine or that I was thankful for being pregnant. There was nothing to celebrate on. It’s a disaster and I don’t want to talk about it, not even with Sora.

“Talk to me when you’re ready, Jinah” she said as she hugged me tight. I hugged her back. Maybe a hug was all I needed.

Out of all of my friends, Sora was the closest one and she really understood me. So when I told her that I wanted to be alone, she didn’t say much and just nodded in understanding. Sora went back to her department as I stayed on the bench at the park in the hospital.

The sonogram picture lay on my lap. I looked at the black dot that the doctor pointed earlier. That’s the baby, my baby. I didn’t know how to react though, but I found myself slowly touching my stomach. It’s still so little, so small. I couldn’t imagine that little dot would grow bigger and become a human being.

Oh my God. I’m pregnant.

Pregnant like there was something, something living inside my stomach. And I didn’t even plan it. I was screwed.

I didn’t know what I should do. Should I tell my mom first? I didn’t know exactly how she would react, but maybe she would be mad at me. Well of course, she would. Or should I tell my manager first? She would kill me also. I sighed and shook my head slowly as I leaned my back to the bench.

Sora made sure that no one would know about this in the hospital Doctor Seo earlier was her sunbae and she was not the type to spread rumours. Sora was sure that her sunbae wouldn’t leak any information regarding my pregnancy. The nurse wasn’t able to see my face. And I wore a mask when I visited Sora for the first time to check my body condition.

Well, there was another thing that was bothering but I don’t think it’s possible.

I mean the father of the baby; at least he should know that he’s actually going to have a kid, right? Ok, maybe I was watching too much drama but usually, at a time like this, the pregnant woman would just go to the man and tell him. And most of the time, it didn’t end up well, especially when both of them didn’t expect the baby. Just like me and him.

I’ve just come to realize that the night I’ve spent with him was totally not worth it. We were both reckless and here came the consequences which I would probably bear alone. I shook my head again. No matter how much I wanted to tell him that I was pregnant with his baby, there was a part of me that said I shouldn’t see him again, let this pregnancy be a secret to him; we didn’t know each other at all and he didn’t even know me.

What if someday he saw me and he just walked away because he didn’t remember me? That would be impossible for me then to tell him that I have his child. Or what if he remembered me then I said that I’m pregnant but he didn’t want the baby? Ok, I mean… I also didn’t plan to have this baby, right? But I didn’t want him to tell me to abort the baby too, although I’m not planning to keep the baby. Ok, I didn’t even know what I’m saying here. There were too many possibilities that might happen, on which I didn’t know if I would be ready to face it or not.

So I left with the final option: I was not going to tell anyone, not until I was sure on what to do with the thing inside me.

Should I keep it or remove it?

Even though from the outside I looked extremely calm for someone who’s pregnant without having a husband around, deep inside, I was trembling. I couldn’t think well knowing that the passionate night I shared with the stranger resulted in a zygote that’s growing inside me. Why did I let that thing happen? Oh God… How could both of us be so careless by not using any protection? And yeah, I was just regretting it now, not when I was drowning in the his sea of kisses nor in the morning after that night.

I was definitely screwed.

What should I do?

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“5, 6, 7, 8! Step aside, Hana! Yes, correct and show your beautiful walk, Mrs. Oh! Yes, perfect, perfect! Jinah, where’s Jinah?” Jung Minwoo, the stage director, mentioned my name and I walked to the runway. The background music stopped as soon as I stepped on the stage joining my fellow model friends who were already lined up.

“Jinah, please walk up until the edge of the stage and give your powerful stare around before you turn back and stop in the middle, ok?” he directed me and I nodded as I continued to follow his lead. The music started again and I did exactly what he said.

I walked through the long stage, paused at the edge of it and looked around at the empty hall before I turned back and walked up to the middle of the stage. That would be my ending pose until the designer, Kim Nara, and the event owner come to walk again with me back to the edge of the stage and greet the audience.

When we’re done with rehearsal, I stayed around the hall. I talked with the stage director again about my steps and we gladly discussed over several possibilities of the moves. I missed walking in the runway though. It’s been a while since I stopped being a runway model and being an exclusive model for some high end brands. So when I was offered the opportunity to represent the classical work of Kim Nara, the young designer with edgy point of view of fashion along with the mutual relationship she made with the owner of this event, I felt excited to join.

“Guys, we’re going to be visited by the hotel representative in a while. Just greet them casually” the director told us as most of us resting. Everyone nodded and back to the chat that was interrupted by the notification.

It was like a reunion for me and several of my friends. We all started in the young age as models, with me most likely to be the maknae around here. But recently, younger models participated also in this event. It was not like I was being envious to them, it was good though to mix the younger ones with the older models to walk on the runway. I was not the youngest anymore, there were several girls younger than me and they all were polite. There were also some seniors, who apparently were having a good relationship with the event owner, and were being asked to join this event.

It was just a simple event though, to celebrate the 30th birthday of the hotel, the W Hotel, where the event would be held. The owner, who was a Chinese lady, wanted to celebrate it in their hotel in Seoul, because they thought that the hotel grew up well there. And having a great connection with the fashion world, she wanted to make the celebration merrier by holding a runway show.

The room suddenly went silent and as I stopped talking, I turned my back to find several people in black suit, man and woman, walked inside the hall. They made two lines leaving an ample space in the middle. And that was when another man appeared. Standing tall in his dark blue suit, handkerchief placed in the pocket of the suit, he nodded politely to all of us. His slightly dark gold hair pulled to the back, giving him an aristocratic look.

“Good afternoon, everyone” he greeted, flashing a gentle smile. “Are you all having your break?” he asked.

“Hello, Mr. Wu,” our director came to him and greeted the guy. “Yes, we just ended our rehearsal and now we’re about to have our lunch.”

“Oh, that’s good then. Well, actually, as appreciation, I already booked you one of our best restaurants here, Florence 8, for your lunch. So, I’d be really happy if all of you could be present and enjoy your resting time there. It’s also one of my mother’s requests,” he politely said.

There were small cheers coming from the room. It’s true, we as models, usually enjoyed luxurious things like this. We could be having breakfast and lunch in two different countries and enjoying a flight twice or thrice in a week, so having a lunch or dinner in expensive restaurants would be a usual for us. But Florence 8 is different. It’s one of the most sophisticated and high end restaurants that were being talked about in Seoul. You have to book even a week before just to enjoy lunch or dinner there. So we have quite a privilege here.

“Thanks a lot, Mr. Wu. We will totally enjoy and appreciate it a lot,” the director said, nodding at the tall guy.

Unexpectedly, our eyes met, and I saw how his eyes grew bigger once he saw me. I didn’t do anything and just looked at him while he locked his eyes with mine. When one of his assistants informed us about the position of Florence 8, I looked away. I didn’t pay attention to the so-called Mr. Wu, but I knew that somehow he was still looking at me, but I tried my best to ignore him.

I didn’t know whether it was related or not, but my body felt a little warm and right at that moment, I felt my stomach contract and it hurt I had to bite my lips to hold on the pain. I clenched on my own fist and quickly sat back on the chair. Cold sweat ran on my neck and back, softly sliding down. I knew it was not due to the rehearsal we took earlier. It was my stomach.

Maybe the baby had just noticed its father’s presence.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“Jinah, are you okay?”

For the past two weeks and for the nth time I was asked whether I was okay or not. Of course I was not okay, there was no way I was going to be okay after all of the things happened to me. I went to a party, got drunk, lost my ity, and now I was pregnant. Perfect.

“Yes, I’m fine” I replied as I stirred the coffee inside the cup with a teaspoon, mindlessly looking at the view of Seoul from the window of the Chinese restaurant located at the highest floor of the W Hotel. Yoonmi unnie, one of my seniors on the runway, sat across me, openly watching me. I knew she wanted to ask me again if I was really fine or not, but I pretended to keep looking at the window.

All of us were enjoying the lunch provided by the hotel management. As expected, the restaurant lived its name. It was a spacious restaurant, with a bit of classical French style. There were a lot of roses placed in the decorations and they had a very huge wall filled with the flowers, covered with a tall and wide glass wall. It was very beautiful and pleasant to the eyes. I couldn’t stop adoring the interior of the hotel.

I ended my lunch quickly, well more to being lazy to eat though. I had no appetite to eat, blame the morning sickness that kept coming every time I woke up. If only I didn’t think of the other thing inside me, maybe I wouldn’t eat at all. But hearing what the doctor said two days before, somehow I got scared that I would make the baby suffer. So whether I liked it or not, I still ate some porridge and fruits, just to fill my empty stomach. Although I was still dazed with the fact that I was pregnant, I still had to pay attention to the little thing that’s living inside my womb.

We were done for that day. Once we had our lunch, all of us could be dismissed from the rehearsal and continue our schedules. While waiting for Minkyung to pick me up, Yoonmi unnie and I decided to chat while having coffee after the lunch. I didn’t really drink it though. Last night I came across a website about pregnancy and it said that coffee was not really good for pregnant women. Oh well, I started to get serious on this role as a mother. Yeah.

“Jinah, heard that your schedule is pretty tight lately?” she asked as she stole a glance at me.

I put the glass away from my lips. I should stop drinking coffee, I guess. It didn’t taste good in my mouth at all.

“Well, yes. I have several events to attend and I’ll be doing some promotional shoot also in LA. How’s your work, Unnie?”

“I only take the one that I want, darling. I’m not young anymore, plus my little girl needs my attention. I’m happy with just one or two events now…” Yoonmi unnie replied with a smile.

Yoonmi unnie is someone I looked up to. She has been my role model since I joined the runway stage. She’s a great sunbae. Sometimes she would scold me if I get weak, crying over the harsh comment given by our mentor. But when I would be doing well, she wouldn’t hide her approval. She’s a famous supermodel, expanding her career abroad and had been an ambassador for several high end brands. She married when she was 30, with a Korean banker who resided in New York. After her marriage, she took absence from the modelling world for two years and moved to New York. When she came back with her husband, she was pregnant. She has now two kids, a boy and a girl. And both were lovely!

“Unnie” I called him. I was a bit hesitant whether I should ask her or not, but I was curious and asking to the person who already had experienced would be much better than just wondering around. “When you know you’re pregnant, how does it feel?”

Yoonmi unnie looked at me and then she smiled as she played with the spoon of her cake.

“It’s beautiful” she answered. “I never knew I would be pregnant that time, because after two years of marriage I still showed no sign of pregnancy but once we were back here, I suddenly got pregnant without me planning it. We’ve been expecting it, so I was really excited”

I didn’t miss the happiness in her words. It was like she was pregnant again when she told me about the feeling. Somehow, I could relate to the words she was saying. Even though I could not fully understand the feeling, but I also had this mixed emotions knowing about my pregnancy. I felt scared, of course, about my parents and for my career that’s put on the line but at the same time, I felt….excited.

I knew I should not be feeling excited because… because I was facing this all by myself but somehow I felt fine. It felt like there was something that was encouraging me to do all the things, that I would be strong to face anything. Automatically, I rubbed my stomach secretly, a little afraid that Yoonmi unnie might see what I was doing

The ring on my phone awakened my wandering mind. Minkyung already arrived and was waiting at the lobby of the hotel.

“Unnie, I’m really sorry. Minkyung is already here and she’s waiting at the lobby now. I still have another schedule to attend to” I said as I replied to Minkyung.

“Really? Too bad, I still want to talk with you, darling. But okay, let’s just meet again on the next schedule, ok?”

I nodded and hugged Yoonmi unnie, before heading to the elevator to meet Minkyung. I greeted the director and my other friends, promised to see them on the next rehearsal. When I walked out from the restaurant, I saw a man in suit watching me. He nodded politely and just like he knew that I was heading for the elevator, he pressed the button and we waited together there. I saw my reflection as I waited for the elevator and I realized that I totally looked like a mess. No matter how much I wanted to make myself look at least presentable (if not beautiful), I found it impossible to cover my pale face. This pregnancy was so dangerous, it ruined my mood to dress up or even just to put some make up on my face.

As I watched my reflection, somehow I remembered him.

He changed his hair colour and cut it shorter, compared to the last time I saw him. But out of his physical appearance, he remained the same. I noticed how his looked remained the same, just like when both of us woke up in the morning after that night. It was just the same, the facial expression he made when he was surprised. But somehow I preferred to just ignore him. Our eye contact meant nothing, as seen when he stepped out just like that after we met again for the first time.

I didn’t know why but partially I felt a little disappointed. I was not hoping for him to talk to me though, it was too crowded earlier with all of the models around and several reporters came to shoot through the rehearsal. But maybe I was at least expecting we could talk, or whatsoever. Ok, that’s just too much. I didn’t know exactly what I want, but the way he ignored me earlier somehow upset me, even though I had no right to be mad at him. I didn’t know whether it was me or the pregnancy that caused me to act this way. I couldn’t stop having mood swings, which I admitted to be a little annoying.

Once the elevator arrived, I quickly slipped inside as it headed to the ground floor. The man in suit, once again, nodded to me and closed the door. There was only me inside the huge elevator, but I didn’t mind, I got used to it. But just seconds after I went inside, I didn’t know whether it was part of pregnancy or the elevator was somehow moving too fast, I felt kind of dizzy.

I tried to hold on to the metal rail for support, afraid that I was going to fall, I moved my body to the corner and stayed there at least until the lobby. I couldn’t even take my phone to call Minkyung. I really hoped someone would see me later on once the elevator opened. I didn’t know what happened, but I remembered I need to cover my stomach so I touched my belly while rubbing it softly. My body started sweat and I shivered. I couldn’t see things clearly, it seemed like there was a yellow screen blurring my vision. The more I blinked my eyes, the dizzier it gets and I couldn’t anymore afford to stand.

Right when the elevator stopped at the lobby with a loud ‘ding’ sound, I gave up.

Everything went dark and the last thing I remembered saying was a weak “Help me”.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

I looked at the list of questions that will be asked during my interview. I was going to do an interview for Seoul Business Daily, where I was the main guest for the hotel and property section. It wasn’t my first interview on the TV though. Ever since I was appointed to be the General Manager for W Hotel, I was always under the spotlight. My secretary gave me the list of the questions so I can be prepared for the interview that would be held next week. There was nothing much different on the question lists, but I found one question intriguing. 

‘What is your life changing experience?’

I’ve been looking for the question for several minutes in my office, but I still couldn’t find the answer. It ws not supposed to be a hard question, but I couldn’t answer it. I didn’t say that my life was always easy (even though a lot of people thought like that), but it wasn’t also really ‘changing’ my life.

I was born rich and I have a smooth educational years and I didn’t think my life was really changing when I was given the company on my 25th birthday. I think my life is flat. Yes, Kris Wu, the heir of W group was having a very plain life. There was nothing much that changed me. So I thought a visit to my uncle’s office on the 30th floor would help me to get a better view for this question. He was my favourite counsellor since I was young.

I was about to take the elevator when I found a body lying inside it. My eyes grew wide as I ran inside and found a very pale looking woman unconscious. I checked her pulse, she’s still alive. But as soon as I looked at her face, it hit me. It’s her.

Questions came back to my mind again. I saw her earlier at the rehearsal and I felt my heart beating faster, if not stopping. I finally saw her again, after she left me just like that weeks ago, all clueless and mindless. I only remembered one thing, her name. Im Jinah.

Without thinking much I quickly lifted her and asked my driver to come to the lobby. How come someone fainted inside my hotel? I had her hands clung onto my neck and as I brought her to the lobby, a girl, short hair and short legs, stopped my way.

“I’m sorry, but who are you?” she asked me with a furious glare, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

“I’m sorry?”

“Where do you think you’re going with the woman in your hands?” she pointed at her.

I shook my head, everyone around the lobby started to get interested, holding a woman in my arms while having another girl talked to me with such an accusing look.

“Listen, the woman here has fainted and-“

“Fainted?” the girl moved closer to me and her face showed panic. “Jinah unnie…” she called her name. She must be someone who knew her.

“Can we put the story later on? She’s unconscious and I think we should bring her to the hospital. Is it okay?” I asked her. The girl quickly nodded and she followed me outside the lobby. It seemed that she’s calling the driver, but my driver arrived faster so I quickly put her at the back seat.

“Miss” I called the girl who was still frantically calling their driver. “Miss, I have my car here. You can just go to the hospital using this car and I’ll call the hospital to quickly accept her. Ok?”

The girl looked at me with a confused look, but I just led her to get inside my car. She sat on the passenger seat. I told my driver to drive carefully and to inform me once they arrived at the hospital. I checked on Im Jinah once again before the car went off. Her body sweated a lot and I was really scared that something bad happened to her. She looked so fragile and her face looked really pale.

I could only look at the back of my limousine leaving the hotel. I was about to take my phone from my pants’ pocket, right when I felt I was holding something. It was a bracelet, with stars dangling around it. It must have been hers. I played with the bracelet, traced every part of it as I recalled her.

I thought that maybe I was still fated to see her once again.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

My schedule finished earlier today. I ended my discussion regarding the next project to expand the hotel outside Seoul with one of my staff. I felt happy and excited; at last, I could do the job I’ve been dying to do by myself. Not under my mother’s command or from some planners, but me. It was time for me to show them that I could do things they never trusted me to do. Just thinking of it made me happy. This was what I’ve been waiting for.

“Sir, are we going to visit the hospital?” the driver asked me, making me come back from my reverie. He saw my confused face, and repeated the words I’ve been forgetting the entire evening. “The lady earlier, she was admitted to the hospital”

“She’s not out yet from there?” I asked him.

“From what I heard, she should stay at least a night there. Pardon me, I didn’t know anything else”

I remembered her bracelet. Maybe I could go visit her, check up on her and just give her bracelet back. And maybe we can talk. I mean… I didn’t remember if both of us ever talked after that night. We had nothing to talk about. And wasn’t one night stands supposed to end just like that? But I thought that maybe at least I should just greet her.

Judging from the last time I saw her and how she managed to ignore me like she didn’t know me, I thought that she was not like those girls who kept bugging my cousins after they were ditched. I also had experience with a clingy woman who thought that one night stand should be continued to the day after that, but I didn’t think that this woman would do the same.

I brought a basket of fruits as I stepped inside the hospital. I gave her name to the nurse and to my surprise, instead of being lead to the general ward, I was told to go to the Woman and Child ward. That was weird, I thought, but maybe that was because she was having some, some “woman” problem. I didn’t think too much and just followed the direction the nurse gave me.

When I arrived at the ward, it was kind of quiet. I looked at the sign and realized that it was the VIP area and her room was in the secluded part of the building. I knocked at the door, but it was half opened so I just went inside. I saw a nurse standing at the edge of the bed while the doctor, a female, held her hand and talked about something. From where I stood, I could see how pale her face was. Her long brown hair was made into a bun and she looked patiently at the doctor.

“Ok so Ma’am, concerning your low blood pressure, I suggest you to take some extra vitamins. It’s low dose, so it’d be fine for your baby. You should eat more vegetables and don’t forget to rest accordingly. Heard about your schedule from your assistant and even though you’re that busy, I hope you could pay attention to your own health. Don’t get too tired and if possible, sleep early.”

I froze in the middle of the room. Whatever the doctor said after the word “baby” was blocked out. I could only think about one thing, which is impossible. No, no, no. I thought wrong. She’s not possibly…

“I’m sorry. Who are you?”

I found three pairs of eyes looking at me and I immediately cleared my throat as I looked at the doctor. She had a serious face with curious eyes.

“I-I am…”

. I don’t know what to tell to her. I looked at Im Jinah, her eyes grew wide and it seemed that she wanted me to just leave. Ok, that hurt.

“Oh. Are you perhaps-“the doctor looked at her and asked her with the words I would never forget. “The father?”

“I’m sorry?” I let out a squeak and once again, everyone in the room turned their eyes to me.

“This lady here, Miss Im Jinah, is currently 5 weeks pregnant, Sir”

She was pregnant. For five weeks. Chance was …. it was mine. Because we did it probably less than two months ago and I just knew that she was… That was her first time. I knew the doctor said other things but I just couldn’t hear her anymore, my mind was having a chaotic discussion inside. And out of everything, the word “baby” is not included. It was out of plan.

I couldn’t say anything when the doctor left the room along with the nurse, leaving me alone with her. I dragged myself closer to her bed, with difficult steps. I felt myself shattering the closer I got to her. She stayed silent and as I saw how skinny she looked under the hospital clothes, I knew she was suffering also. It sounded selfish, but I was still hoping that I heard wrong. So I need to reassure myself, just this once, just to make sure that I wasn’t wrong.

“Is that-“I paused my words, my voice came out trembling. “Is tha – true?”

She didn’t say anything and she didn’t even make any movement. She just stayed there.

I challenged myself to look at her in the eyes; she almost looked like she was going to break anytime soon. Her watery eyes showed me that she could suddenly cry once I said anything wrong. She just looked at me helplessly.

I’ve just found my answer.

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[1] OBS/GYN: two surgical-medical specialties dealing with the female reproductive organs in their pregnant and non-pregnant state

 

Hi Guys!

I'm so surprised to see the support for this story. I'm sorry I haven't had replied to any of your comments. I'll try my best to reply your comment one by one :) thank you for liking this story, reading for it, upvoting it, and of course, commenting it. I appreaciated every message, every comment that's being put on behalf of this story. Thank you also for supporting this pretty couple. 

Here we welcome chapter 2. Do you have any idea how the story would evolve? :) 

Actually, I'm not planning to create an angst story. I missed writing a romantic comedy scenes, so probably I'll try to mix the story so it wouldn't be forever angst :p I hope you like this chapter and more chapters coming up, but I still have to focus on the kaistal story. Hopefuly I can write down the stories one by one and finished it accordingly. I'm so sorry for my other subscribers who had been subscribed to my other stories that haven't been updated by me. I'm really sorry and hopefully I can do better in time. 

See you in the next chapter! 

xoxo