Track 136 | NO GOING BACK by Yuno

Five months of living with Haoran plus learning the parts of the truth resulted in improvements in Rara's friendship with him. It remained platonic, and they weren’t close like siblings, but they managed to get along. Despite these positive changes, there were a lot of walls between them—Haoran was right when he said he saw himself in Rara. She had layers and layers of skin that hid her truest form, just like he did.

It was Saturday, and Rara was at home with her family. Ahyoung, her grandmother, had visited. However, devastation greeted her when she arrived and at the same time, she brought with her bad news. She wasn’t informed of Rara’s abrupt separation from Baekhyun. Five months ago, she could have seen it all coming, and all of this could have been prevented or at least done in a less painful way, however, even the council had her in the palm of their hands.

She stirred the tea in front of her. “Remember when I couldn’t come with you to Italy because I was occupied with reading?” She asked. “Well, Byul sent me a package. Books. Lots of it. She asked me to read them all because there was important information embedded in them, and she thought that, while reading, I could have future visions of finding out what was hidden in between those pages. So I paid attention to every sentence and put my 100% concentration in it.” Ahyoung looked up at Rara. “I kept reading and reading until Byul showed up at the door just recently. She warned me that some of the forbidden books in Aima Lamia’s library were missing.” She sighed deeply. “Byul specifically wanted these books to be kept away because she knew it could be used against me. It turns out those books were the very ones sent to me, the one she warned me about, and those books were designed to take me away from reality, through unconscious hypnosis, in the form of reading religiously, thus preventing me from seeing visions. It ate up my attention and will. It was actually a collection of spells enticing you to absolutely nothing but leading you to believe there was something, achieving its sole purpose of grabbing your attention with zero distractions, and then, when it had you in the deep, it slowly deactivates your ability, like putting it in a hibernating mode. Apparently, I was bewitching myself. And it wasn’t Byul who sent me the package—Bora had used Byul’s name so that I would believe it. And I painstakingly fell for it. Right now, I can't use my ability to see the future. And I don't know how long they'll remain inactive.” Ahyoung reached for Rara’s hand and squeezed it. She smiled at her sympathetically. “I’m sorry, dear. I’ve been careless. When you first met Byul, her purpose was to warn me about the council. I thought they wanted me to join the council and will try to force me; I didn’t know they were after you. If I had known it wasn’t Byul, I would have seen all this coming, and maybe you’d still be with Baekhyun.”

Rara smiled back with the same melancholy. “It’s okay, grandma. If your abilities failed you, it seems that fate didn’t want you interfering this time. Maybe this is what’s supposed to happen.”

“Does Haoran treat you right, though?”

“Haoran and I...” Rara pondered for a while, looking for the right words. What Haoran shared with her about his partner was a secret and she didn’t want to be the one to break their newly cemented relationship, so she chose to be careful with her words. “It’s kind of complicated. But we’re good. Haoran is, you know, intimidating. But he’s pretty cool.” Rara said. “We’re friends. But we don’t...we don’t like each other the way Baekhyun and I do.”

Ahyoung raised an eyebrow at her with a small smile. “Of course, I know that. Why, that chemistry between you and Baekhyun might as well be a separate branch of science.”

Rara laughed. “Yeah? Well, we’ve been dormant for a while now. I underestimated him.” She said. “I haven’t seen him since I wrote him that letter. I said a lot of stuff and I threatened him not to appear before me or I won’t speak to him ever again.”

“Baekhyun was one to follow you, Rara.” Ahyoung commented. “If you told him to jump off a cliff, I bet he’d do it even before you finish the sentence.”

Rara nodded slightly. “It’s incredible, the things he does for me.” She said. “But right now, I need time to figure out this whole thing. I need him out of the hazardous lane. I want him where there’s zero possibility of him getting hurt, and that’s why we’re not together.”

“I know you’ll oppose to this but it isn’t a matter of avoiding getting hurt, this was a matter of how much pain you were willing to endure.” Ahyoung stated. “But I understand why you play it safe.”

“Even if Baekhyun was willing to get hurt for me, I wouldn’t let that idiot do it.” Rara said silently. “I’ll make sure of that.”

“What are you guys talking about?” Chanyeol asked as he approached the dining table. “What’s up, Rara? I haven’t seen you in a while.” Rara was always staying with Haoran, sometimes, even on weekends. She barely hung out with the wolf pack for obvious reasons.

“Nothing in particular.” Rara replied. “What are you up to?”

“Drove Appa to Elle’s.” Elle’s was a high-end convention c