I laid in bed that night full of worries and thoughts about Himchan. --But worrying about Eunhae even more. Just how much did she have to go through? What is Youngjae's dad even doing? He can't possibly be doing the “i'm-going-to-hurt-the-ones-you-love-and-then-kill-you” plan. Because if he is, –

I turn myself onto my side and block away my thoughts irritated. It's two in the morning and I do not want to think about this annoying anymore. I can just that in a few hours later when the day is bright.

My door clicks and opens in the darkness. I listen carefully and try to sense who was coming I, only to glimpse over my bed and see an outline of a small boy, hearing small sniffs coming from his nose.

“Hanwul?” I whisper, “What's wrong?”

He walks towards my bed and helps himself go under my over, leaning his body over to mine. Soon enough I start feeling his wet tears soak into my sleeve.

“You were throuwing a fit today saying that you hated me, what's the matter?”

“I-I'm scared.” he manages to say though his tears.

“Nightmare?”

I feel his head rub up and down against my arm. I remove my arm from his head so he can comfortably lay his head on it. I turn my body to him and start calming him down by gently patting and his hair, letting the next set of tears soak my shoulder.

“It's alright, it was only a dream.”

His sniffs start to go away but his tears don't stop flooding my shoulder. I could fell him scoot to breathe for air, and I slightly pull away and look into his eyes.

“If it makes you feel any better, my mom died when I was in high school.”

“How?”

I wrap my arm around his waist and his tears start to lessen, “By someone.”

By your dad.

I continue, “I understand how lonely and sad you might feel. My point is, I'm not going to kill you –ever. Not tomorrow, not when you're fifty years old. You're an important kid to me and Youngjae and I are going to let you grow up to be happy, alright?”

He happily nods his head with the last set of tears flowing out of his eyes.

The thought finally comes to me, “Where is Youngjae? He's not in his room?”

Hanwul shakes his head, “I don't know where he is.”

He'll probably be back by the morning, right?

It was probably minutes after Hanwul answered my questions and soon both of our eyes were beginning to close –or so I thought.

“Noona, do you and hyung love each other?”

Do I love Youngjae?

His question repeats in my head probably for about twenty times. Do I love Youngjae? If I had to say the answer out loud I would definitely decline, but.... Do I love Youngjae?What exactly does Hanwul mean by love? Love as in an intimate relationship or the kind of relationship Youngjae and I had back in high school? I guess Youngjae and I did have an intimate relationship because we were generally close with one another ever since we were young, but complications happened and such, so do I love Youngjae?

-- it. I don't want to worry about this when I have a lot of other stuff to worry about.

“Just go to sleep kiddo,” I pat his head to sleep.

Just like how my mom used to –just like how Youngjae used to.

He probably doesn't even like me anymore. He wouldn't even like me after having to deal with my attitude and how I do my best to ignore him. It's not like I mean to ignore him, I feel scared whenever I'm with him. As if maybe I might get somehow hurt. I don't know how, but I fear the future.

++

I feel a vibration running through my head, only to finally gain conscious and realize that it's my phone getting a call from someone. I lazily but carefully reach for my phone over Hanwul's head and answer the call.

“Hello?” my hoarse morning voice speaks.

“Saehee, this is Youngjae. Can you send Hanwul off to daycare today? I'm busy.”

My eyes squint from the sudden bright light from my phone screen and look at the new number, “Did you get a phone?”

“The maids will help him get ready and he has a ride as well. Can you just go and see him off?”

Thanks for not answering my question.

“And make sure to pick him up as well.”

“How long are you going to be gone for? What are you doing?”

“I heard about Eunhae, so I'm seeing if I can find anything about my dad.”

“I'll make sure to send Hanwul off very well.”

I hang up the phone right when the “th” of “thank” comes out, staring at the new number. My fingers lead to the “add to contacts” area and I save it as “Yoo Youngjae.”

My eyes widen, he didn't possibly tell Himchan, did he? To be honest I was planning on Himchan myself, just not this instant. It's bad for me as being Eunhae's friend and all, but I feel like Himchan needs to know that truth instead of being lied to behind his back. The later he finds out the more furious he'll turn to be.

Hanwul's morning stretch ends up punching my nose, but he continues to sit himself up, not realizing that he just attacked me.

“Good morning Hanwul,” I grumble.

He lets out a groan in return and yawns, flopping his body back down on the bed.

“Read to go to daycare?”

“I don't want to go,” he whines.

“Why?”

He just sits up again and runs away, eventually getting caught and get forced by the maids to wash up and change his clothes for daycare.

I literally had to push Hanwul out of the car and ended up carrying him to his class. When we make it to the classroom I try putting him down, but he only clings onto me as if he's some kind of koala and I'm the branch of a tree. Does Youngjae have to go through this every day?

I make eye contact with Somi who soon gallops over to me, happy that we get the chance to see each other after all this time –even though we met up last week.

“Saehee! How are you?”

“Good, just here to drop off Hanwul.”

Finding a daycare for Hanwul was actually simple. We knew someone who was a daycare teacher, sje was willing to get a new student and then you have a daycare for Hanwul to attend.

“Where's Youngjae?”

“He had some Guinness to take care of.”

“That's very nice, dropping Hanwul for Youngjae.”

“Well, not for Youngjae. For Hanwul.”

Somi giggles and jokingly hits my arm, “You know what I'm talking about.”

“No, I actually don't.” I roll my eyes, “Somi, I worry for you. You're gradually turning into Daehyun.”

“Is that suppose to be a compliment? Well, thanks!”

Somi bends down to make eye contact with the Hanwul who was clinging onto my leg, “Hello Hanwul! How are you?”

“I want to go home,” he mumbles.

Somi gently puts an arm on his back, “And why is that?”

He doesn't reply and instead shoves his face into my leg. Somi sighs and stands back up.

“Are there any problems with Hanwul?” I ask.

Her guilty expression reveals her answer, and she whispers into my ear “To be honest, Hanwul isn't exactly fitting in with the other kids. They call him names and make fun of him because he doesn't have a mom or dad. I'm doing my best to discipline the kids, but it's tough.”

My eyes widen, “Does Youngjae know about this?”

She nods her head, “It started ever since the second day when Hanwul announced that his mom died and he doesn't know where his dad went to the kids. I told Youngjae, and he made sure Hanwul came to school ever since then. He wanted Hanwul to fight through this and prove to the kids that he's better than what they think he is.”

A sudden mix of anger, sadness, and guilt flood through me. How come I was didn't know about Hanwul's suffering? I always thought daycare was going fine for Hanwul and that nothing was going wrong, because he was hiding all of that. What if he has a lot more things that he's hiding, and is just to reserved to share?

++

I continue lost in my own thoughts as I sit on the couch in the living room. Why must so many things be going on at this instant? First I find out that Eunhae is sleeping with other men and that Hanwul is being the outcast of his class.

Just then the door opens and Youngjae comes in, dragging Eunhae in a short, tight dress with really high heels on. Her full-on makeup almost made her seem like a different person. She was trying her best to make Youngjae let go of her wrists, but that only made him grab them harder.

“What are you two doing?” I ask, my voice a little louder from seeing this shocking sight.

Eunhae looks at me and desperately begs, “Please, Saehee. Make him let go of me.”

“I dragged her here because this thinks she's doing nothing wrong! At this rate she'll never ask Himchan for forgiveness,” Youngjae furiously fights back.

I let out a serveral amount of blinks, “Whoa, whoa. Both of you calm down. Youngje let go of Eunahe, and both of you sit here so we can have a calm and mature conversation... or at least try to.”

Youngjae throws Eunhae's wrists away from his hand and makes his way first to sit down, Eunhae timidly but angrily following after. After giving them a few moments of calming down and not making any eye contact with each another I sigh, and we begin our conversation.

“So, ladies first. Eunhae, please explain what happened that led you into this spot right now.”

“I was working until Youngjae barged in and threw a fit, yelling at me to apologize to Himchan or some kind of . I don't see any reason to do it so I opposed, of course. But he just had to be a bastard and drag me to this ing place.”

ing place? I blink. Well alright then.

“Youngjae? Your side of the story please?”

“You were making out with a totally random guy, Eunhae. You have a boyfriend, if you're really that stupid to not know. Either you end things with him this instant and never see him ever again or beg every single second for his forgiveness for the rest of your life.”

“Don't tell me what to do! You don't even know what I'm going through. And what were you doing in my workplace in the first place?”

“I was there because I know what you are going through! I know you work there because the person that gave you the ing job is my dad!”

Eunhae opens the fight back, but no words came out, too shocked about the information Youngjae just spat at her, “and you couldn't ask your dad for a better job for me?” she asks in disbelief.

“He's been abusing me for the past three years, do you think I even keep contact with him now?”

I jump in, “It seems that we have taken things too far. Let's just calm down again and –”

Eunhae gets up from her seat, “No. My job is the only way to support my family. End things with Himchan? Fine, tell him that we're over for me.”

“That's it?”

All three of our eyes widen and turn to Himchan who overheard our whole conversation.

“H-Himchan,” Eunhae gulps.

“Eunhae,” I whipser, “Leave before Himchan kills you.”

She makes eye contact with me with her tear eyes, “Please tell Himchan I don't mean to. But don't tell him about my job.”

I shake my head, “I'm sorry, Eunhae. I'm going to have to tell him.”

She finally lets out her tears as she runs towards the door and away from this mansion.

“Saehee .. what exactly just happened?” Himchan asks, his blank stare glued onto Eunhae's previous spot.

I let out a deep breath before explaining, “Eunhae didn't mean it like that. Her family is financially struggling and she desperately needed a job, so she works at a pub as an item. She knows that if she told you that her family was fincially struggling, you'd just basically give all your money to her, and she didn't want that burden. She just has too much going on right now, Himchan. I'm sure you'll give her some slack, right?”

Himchan's expression after my explanation clearly showed that he did not want to give Eunhae any sort of 'slack.'

 daehyun is an idiot (like me)