If I Fall [36]
If I Fall
Myungsoo.. I need to follow Myungsoo. :( I need to tell him the truth.
That I like him. Ugh. -__-
Even though I know it will be very hard. And I'm very sure that he doesn't feel the same way. Why?
Because he keeps on thinking of Yoona..
And that makes me think, what does Yoona have that I don't? But ofcourse, I don't have the choice. It is Yoona that makes Myungsoo happy and contented.
I'm just nothing..
I was able to get in our bus because I can't chase Myungsoo. He's too fast even though he just walks.
As I walk inside the bus..
"Oh. Jiyeonnie. Good thing you're here. Myungsoo went out to look for you awhile ago." Eunjung said as she sat beside me who supposedly Myungsoo's chair.
"Yes. Eunjung is right. Where have you been and it took you too long to return?" Hyomin asked as she looked at me.
As of now, I don't care about thos questions..
"Yeah. Did you ate your lunch already?"
I looked around the bus to see that Myungsoo is already sitting beside....
Woohyun. They're laughing with each other. :(
That means he's really mad.
>"Ya. And Myungsoo asked if Hoya can sit beside you since Myungsoo suddenly wants to hangout with Woohyun." Eunjung said.
:(
T___T
"Jiyeon-ah?"
I looked down and smiled bitterly. Did I do something wrong that he hates me this much? Maybe that playing with Kai was a bad move but... I just wanna know what he feel towards me.
I just wanna know if he also feels the same.
But the hell, what happened? I'm just assuming that he likes me back yet I know that inside his heart is a carved Yoona's name.
:(
"Hey! Are you listening?" Hyomin said.
"Earth to Jiyeon." Eunjung shouted but I don't care. I just want to see if Myungsoo will look at me or he'll just ignore me even though he know that I'm already here.
*TOINKS*
Ouch.
I can feel Eunjunggie poked me in my cheeks abit hard. -___-
Tsk.
"Ya! Jiyeon-ah. Sit down. The bus is about to move now." Eunjung warned me. So I looked at my seat and saw Hoya looking at me.
He patted my chair, signalling me to sit beside me. I nodded, he smiled and, "Take a sit now." So I did.
"You're looking at him, again." Hoya said as I sat beside him. I looked at him weirdly. Uhh. Maybe he knew that I like Myungsoo?
T____T NOOOOOO! :(
"Uh. What do you mean?" I asked as I rub my finger through the back of my head, playing innocent. Denying the fact that I know what he is talking about.
Laaaah. T-T
"Tsk. Yeonnie, stop denying it."
Is it really obvious? Kai noticed it. Wonnie noticed it. Maybe Eunjung, Hyomin and Woohyun noticed it too..
And the worst it, Myungsoo might know it too that's why he's acting like that. Maybe he hates me for liking him..
Tsk. I shouldn't have let it show. :(
No Jiyeon. If you tell Wonnie the thruth, the next thing you know is that the whole school or even Yoona would know it..
"Naaah..." I looked at him and tried to smiled abit playfully, "I don't like Myungsoo. I'm just concerned with him because he is like my older brother."
Yeah.. Older brother. Just like what I've told Kai. Hahaha. I'm a good liar. -____- :(
"Tsk." Wonnie hissed as he looked at me and ruffled my hair, "Yeonnie-ah, we're still bestfriends, right?"
Is Wonnie still my bestfriend?
Yes! Of course. He would always be. :)
"Of course." I looked at him and smiled. He looked back straight to my eyes and nodded..
"Then can I tell you something?"
._______.
I suddenly feel nervous. -.- I don't know why. Ugh.
"Of course." I said as I smiled awkwardly.
"Sure?" Wonnie asked nervously..
=_______=
"Yes."
He cleared his throat before looking at me, "Actually.. Yeonnie. I like someone."
Ohhhhh. *-* My bestfriend is inlove. :ooo Who could that lucky girl b-------
".....And it's you who I like."
WHAAAAAAT.
"U-uh----"
"I like you, Yeonnie-ah."
I like you, Yeonnie-ah.
I like you, Yeonnie-ah.
I like you, Yeonnie-ah.
I like you, Yeonnie-ah.
I like you, Yeonnie-ah.
No. That's impossible. O__O
"That's freakin impossible.."
"No. I've waited for the day that the two of us will meet again." Wonnie said as he looked at me and tried to smile.. I know he is hurted, but I can't let him be hurted more if I didn't tell him the thruth.. That I don't feel something special towards him.
"I'm sorry.." I said.
I looked at the window and rested my head there. Yeah, I sat beside the window.
It would have been better if I'm sitting beside Myungsoo. Not that I hate Wonnie but I feel awkward and I feel like I just lost a friend because I'm sure he wants to be something like lovers. :(
T__T
And if I'm sitting beside Myungsoo, I could have apologized now. :(
Ugh. What a life. It's so hard. -_-
I just confessed my feelings towards her. But it seems like it's not enough.
I know Jiyeon is shocked.
But I really can't help it. I think it's the best time to confess, to tell her that she's very special to me. That I want to take care of her..
Because everytime I try to confess, Myungsoo will always see us and take Jiyeon's attention away.
Jiyeon obviously likes him. I can see it in her eyes..
And I think, Myungsoo likes her too. It's just that he thinks that he still likes Yoona that's why he thinks that he doesn't like Jiyeon.
I looked at Jiyeon who is currently sleeping while her head is resting on the glass window beside her.
I want to take care of her..
She's too precious to be hurted..
She's fragile..
I know it would be her first time to fall inlove with someone.. That's why she should be treated carefully.
T_T
Maybe Jiyeon and I are really destined to be friends. Only to be friends.
I know someday, this feeling will be gone and that is if we are really not meant to be. I just need to go through the flow.
And yet, I can still take good care of her even if we're just friends! :D
Yes. Maybe I should accept the fact that Jiyeon doesn't like me.. She's happy with Myungsoo. And if ever Jiyeon run to me crying, I'll be the one to revenge for her..
Yeahh. That's the way it should be. :)
I grabbed a blanket and covered Jiyeon's arms with it. She must be freezing.. The aircon above her is at the highest power. I know I'm a weakling for giving up on Jiyeon too early even if there is a possibility that she would like me back.. But I can't force someone to like me back, right?
It is the heart who decides..
Jiyeon will always be special even if time passes be. She will always have this special part in my life that no one can ever replace. Hahaha! It makes me remember put childhood days. When she always teased me because I can't write small letter 'e' perfectly.
I remember when she puts make up on my face because I need to pretend as a girl. Hahaha.
I also remember that she always saves money so that we can buy icecream once a week. Yeah. Ever since she was a kid, she already loves Icecream. That's why when she's sad, you'll find her on the nearest icecream store. XD
Those memories are really priceless. :)
***
That night..
Phew. Just got home from the fieldtrip. That was so fun yet so dissappointing because of Hoya and Myungsoo..
Aish. :(
I looked at my phone and saw Kai's number.
Maybe I should call him? Maybe I should ask what happened between him and Myungsoo? Why does Myungsoo acted that way?
Hmm. Yeah. Maybe I really should, so that I would know how should I say sorry to Myungsoo the next time I saw him.
I was about to press the call button when...
The screen of my phone went black.
I tried pressing the power button but it doesn't power on. Okay. That means my phone is already low battery. Tsk. Wrong timing, huh?
-____-
I looked around for my charger and saw it on my cabinet. I reached for it and plugged it on the outlet near my bed.
I left it there and went on the kitchen and fixed the things that I brought on our fieldtrip awhile ago.
I suddenly remembered what Hoya said. Aish. :( What a day, so stressful.
After fixing my things, I returned to my room and rested on my bed.. "What to do?" I talked to myself as I looked around my room.
I feel sleppy already.
I looked at the clock beside my bed and saw that it is only 8pm. It's still early to sleep. And our house might be on fire if I left my phone charging while I'm sleeping. Tsk.
Maybe I should alarm? :D Yes. Ofcourse, I should. =___=
I sat on my bed and reached my clock, and alarmed it at 11pm. :>
Weeeh. Maybe I should start sleeping now. :)
After 3 hours...
*RING RING RING.*
Ugh. I'm still sleepy. I thought there is no classes but why do I alarmed my clock?
Oh. My phone. I suddenly remembered my phone.
I looked at my phone and unplugged it. Yeay! Fullcharged! :>
I turned it on and saw 5 new messages.
The others were group messages..
While the other one is from.. Myungsoo. I click it and started reading the message..
From; Myungie. :">
sms: Call me when you are already in your house please.
Huh? That means it was sent 3 hours ago? I looked at the time that it was sent and I'm right, it was sent three hours ago. D;
Should I call him even though it's late? Ofcourse, yes.
Calling Myungsoo..
"Uhm. Hey." I murmured.
[Psh... You called.] Myungsoo said as he sighed. :( He still sound mad. T__T
"Uhh. Sorry, my phone went---"
[Why so late? Tsk.]
He still mad. I wanna cry. :(
His voice is so priceless. T__T
His face, his cold attitude.. His eyes, his nose, his hugs, his breaths... I miss those. We've been fighting alot this days. And I feel dumb for that. I'm too childish.
T___T
Lord, can I have Myungsoo? I promised I'll be a good girl. :( I promise I won't leave him just like what Yoona did.
It's just that I love him..
Dugdug dugdug..
[Jiyeon-ah, are you crying?]
"Eh?" I said as I rub my eyes, yeah. I've been crying while wishing he was mine. T__T "I'm not crying."
[You are. Tsk. Is everything okay------]
"Myungsoo-ah, Do you hate me?" I suddenly blurted out. Yes, I just want to know if he hates me. :(
I've been so childish this past few days and they said that guys hate it when they are with a childish girl..
[No. Not at all.] He answered, I heared him chuckled, [Yah. Jiyeon-ah. I'm sorry.]
"Huh? For what?" Yes. He's saying sorry even if it is my fault. Tsk.
[Nevermind. I just feel like saying sorry.] He said in a low voice..
"Oh...---"
[Sometimes I wish she was you..]
"Huh? Who?"
[Yoona. Hmm.]
"Why?"
[Because I don't have to hide my feelings towards her.. I'm free to show that I love her.]
Sometimes he wish that I am Yoona so he doesn't need to hide her feelings towards her?
What's the meaning of that? I don't get it. -__-
"You still love her, don't you?"
[Hmm. I guess? But not as much as before. Psh.]
:""">
That means he's starting to put out Yoona away from his system. :)
But, lol. Ofcourse, that doesn't mean he doesn't love her anymore. He still feels something for her..
[Jiyeon-ah, do you like--- uh.. I mean love Kai?"]
HAHAHAHAHAAH. XDDD It makes me remember the dorkiness of Kai. :)
"Hmm. I don't know." Yeah. I think that's the safest answer I could ever thinked of..
[The two of you doesn't look good with each other. Tsk. I'm more handsome than that guy.] He suddenly said.
Yeah. He's right. For me, Myungsoo is the most handsome creature that God ever made. :')
"Tch. Whatever you say, Myungsoo." I said, trying to sound that I don't like him..
[It's really good to hear you saying my name.] He suddenly said.
:''>
Uh. It's weird. Why does Myungsoo talking this way? Is he drunk? Is he taking dangerous drugs? -___-t
"You're so weird."
[Psh. Aren't you sleepy?] He suddenly asked.
He was mad. He was sweet, and now.. He is forcing me to sleep? Weird mood swings. -___-
"Actually, I am." I said as I smiled because I imagined him sleeping beside me. :))
[Ohh. Then sleep now, princess. *laughs*]
*o* Waaaah. He called me princess. :"""""">
"O-okay. G-goo-goodnight." I said, I kept on stuttering because I'm too hyper.
Weeeee! I wanna jump. I wanna smile. :DDDD
[Okay. Sweet dreams. I'll end the call now. Okay?]
"Yeah. Goodnight. Sleep well, and I'm sorry."
[It's okay. Yah! :D Remember that I'll always be more handsome than Kai, okay?]
Psh. Why won't Myungsoo admit that he's jealous of Kai? Hahaha. He keeps on saying that he's more handsome, but yeah. Kai is handsome too. :)
"Tsk." I said as I laugh, "Okay, okay."
[Bye.]
"Bye."
WAAAAAAH. Best night ever. :')
-
Two days later..
She's back.
You know who I'm talking about?
Yes. It's Yoona. Im Yoona. :(
She just returned and I'm kinda scared. Myungsoo and I are okay the past few days, but I guess, it'll end soon. :(
"Ya~!"
She's gonna take Myungsoo away. And I'm sure.. Myungsoo would like it. :(
How about us----I mean, me?
Tsk. All of it will be gone in a blink of an eye. T-T
"Yeonnie~!" Hoya said, that brought me back to my senses.
"Yes?"
"Tsk. I said Yoona is back and she's looking for Myungsoo." Hoya said as he smiled at me. I smiled back at him, but yeah, a faint one.
"Ohh. Haha, I know where Myungsoo is. Maybe I should help Yoona." I said as I walk away from Hoya.. Uhm. Wonnie. Uh. Actually, I don't know where Myungsoo is..
Why does Hoya seems so happy now that Yoona is back? Am I the only one who isn't happy about her return? Is Hyomin and Eunjung happy too? :(
I think I'm the only one who's not happy about Yoona's return. Why? She turned Myungsoo down, and now she's looking for him. Wow. -___-
Don't get me wrong, I'm not mad at her. It's just that.. I'm a bit bitter and jealous.
T___T
I'm pretty sure that Myungsoo is super happy with this. Aish.. And not for being a negative thinker but I think our good uhm-relationship will now end. Our closeness will be put in one side and will be forgotten for the rest of our lives.
Nooo. I don't want that to happen. :( Never.
"Jiyeonnie~!" I heared a familliar voice call me. I turned around and saw Yoona running towards me.
Yoona. T-T Why did you come back. We're already happy. And I guess.. Myungsoo isn't missing you anymore. (?)
Ugh.
"Oh. Hi~! Glad to see you again." I said as I fake smiled and hugged her. Well, I don't hate her. She's still my friend. It's just that... I like Myungsoo.. And Myungsoo likes her, not me. :(
"Yeah. I just returned last sunday." She said as she smiled before hugging me back. She chuckled, "I missed you Jiyeonnie.."
"Me too." I said. Wow. She's so happy. It was like nothing happened when we're on Paris. Uggh.
"Anyway, did you saw Myungsoo?"
//3
"Uhh."
"I want to say sorry for what I did in Paris. Uhm, Jiyeonnie~ Do you think Myungsoo still love me---"
"Yoona? Jiyeon?" I heared it. It was Myungsoo's voice. :(
Yoona looked at him and smiled. "Hey."
I don't want to turn around. I don't want to see how Myungsoo smiles because Yoona is here with us again. I don't want to see how happy he is. Because it hurts.
It really hurts that even though I'm the one who's always beside Myungsoo when he is sad. But still, he chose Yoona, the girl who keeps on hurting him.
TT___TT
"Y-you're back." I heared Myungsoo said to Yoona as I hear his footsteps towards Yoona and I.
I need to stay away from the both of them if I don't want to get hurt.
"Yeah. I came back here last Sunday. And I came back to do what I promised." Yoona said as she walk near Myungsoo.
Yoona came back to do what she promised? Didn't she broke up with Myungsoo? That happened in real life, right? I know I'm not dreaming. :(
I don't want to turn around and look at them. I don't want to see how the two of them look together. Aish. :( They're a match made in heaven. T___T
"But---" Myungsoo was cutted by Yoona, "Ah. Myungsoo~! I missed your hugs."
Sht.
TT__TT
I can't take this anymore. :(
I started walking away when Myungsoo called me, "Jiyeon, wait!"
Turn around or not? :(
-
A/N: Heyyo. Sorry for the slow updates. Been very busy. :( Just want to let you know that I want to know your opinions about the story. :( I know I'm a slow-paced author, and I'm feeling very sorry for that. Comment what you think about this guys. <3 If you have time, please comment longer. :) I enjoy reading them and they give me inspirations. :) Thankies. Have a great day. :D
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