ii. Fourteen
Lifeline.Watching Ricky bolt out of the hospital after Byunghun, Wooshin turns to his brother with his eyes flaming, unable to digest Chanhee’s cruel words he had killed Byunghun with.
“Lee Chanhee!” The redhead grabs Chanhee roughly by his arm, his eyes held a deadness, a stillness. Chanhee has never seen the boy look this way and to be honest it scared him a little. Wooshin’s gaze was lethal like he was going to murder his brother.
Commanding his brother to follow him, Wooshin wheels himself to an empty corridor and faces the window. Chanhee follows suit and stands beside him in silence, he knew he has gone too far but what was he supposed to say? The truth was shoved in his face too quickly he lost all his rationality. It was true that Chanhee never wanted to be reminded of the night he spent with Byunghun. Admittedly he knows he has unsettling feelings for the younger but that didn’t mean he wanted to be bonded with Byunghun through much less have a child with him. To Chanhee Chanhun was a mistake and wasn’t supposed to exist, that was that.
Beside him, Wooshin took a deep breath. He knew Byunghun never wanted Chanhee to know about Chanhun or what he went through simply because he didn’t want to come in between Jonghyun and Chanhee. After knowing that Chanhee and Jonghyun had broken up, Wooshin has once suggested for Byunghun to reveal the truth to Chanhee because afterall, Chanhee did deserve to know. But now he was regretting his mere suggestion to the core seeing how his brother had hurt Byunghun so deeply with his words. And the reason Byunghun insisted on keeping Chanhee in the dark even after learning about his break up was that Byunghun felt Chanhee deserved a second shot at happiness. He didn’t want to tie Chanhee down with a child, he didn’t want to burden the elder. He didn’t want to be a trouble to the elder. All Byunghun ever wanted was for Chanhee to be happy because he loved Chanhee, so deeply that he was willing to sacrifice his own happiness for the boy.
“Hyung. Do you kow that Byunghun kept the child a secret from you because he didn’t want the child or himself to come between you and Jonghyun back then. He genuinely wanted you to be happy with Jonghyun. But he still kept Chanhun and brought him into this world because he loved you. He loved you so much he thought he could at least keep a piece of you with him since he knows he can never have you. He brought up your child so well, he slogged his guts out for your child because Chanhun is your child. Chanhun has your blood flowing inside of him, he is your lifeline and Byunghun would do anything to protect your lifeline. How could you be so heartless hyung?”
Chanhee stuffs his hands in his pockets and pretended to not hear a word Wooshin said. It all sounded like excuses to him. In Chanhee’s point of view, he felt that if Byunghun truly loved him he wouldn’t have done such a selfish thing, keeping the child. Chanhun only serves as a reminder of their mistake.
“Chanhun shouldn’t have been born Wooshin. He shouldn’t even have existed that night was a mistake! It wasn’t supposed to happen I was dead drunk and Lee Byunghun gave his consent! And you Lee Wooshin how could you not tell me? How could you not tell me that Byunghun was pregnant with my child when I left?”
“Tell you? So you could force Byunghun to abort Chanhun?” Wooshin scoffed as he banged his fist on the armrest of his wheelchair creating a soft thud from the hard impact.
“Honestly do you know how much he suffered over the years, just to bring your child up? In return for what? For you to yell at him telling him he should have aborted your child? For you to assume that Chanhun is Myungsoo’s child? For you to think that he would sleep around with someone else even though all of us can clearly see that he likes you. No in fact he loves you!”
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