Myungsoo's POV:

And as if I were addicted to the heartbreak, I'm aching to see Seohyun's face again.

Her words and scent lingered on me- even if we only talked for one minute. She said that we'd see each other soon, right?

I was walking the streets of Seoul- back and forth. Just in case she came out to walk again. I was strolling down the roads and trails we walked together, trying to fill that empty void with her. I was trying to arise any memories I had with her again.

The never-ending burning and aching in my chest pulsed in my heart. Her voice rang in my ears. I wanted to run to her and take her into my arms and whisper into her shoulder that I was hers again and that everything would be okay in the end. I wanted her to smile and I wanted to feel her presence and be with her again.

I wanted everything to be perfect.

Well, doesn't everyone?

I wonder if she thought about me everyday since she left like I thought of her.

I wonder if she's thinking about me right now.

If she's missing me as much as I miss her.

I'm going crazy.

I don't know what made me hurt her- Maybe, just maybe I was thinking of Jinah.. Maybe I was trying to drown out all of the traces of pain and betrayal left over in my heart out by doing the same thing she did to me. 

Then again, I'd figure out how much Seohyun meant to me whenever she tried to leave, but then forget the second the words, "I'll stay," came out of her quivering mouth.

Her place is next to me and it seems as if with every gallon of tears that fall out of my eyes, she gets farther away from me. I've given up forgetting about her.

I just want her back.

Seohyun's POV:

I was doing fine before he appeared in my life again. I was forgetting about him and starting to move on until he showed up in front of my eyes yesterday. I was happily living along until his soft voice made my heart beat faster.

I refrained from every street that I ever walked with him to avoid any memories coming up again. I changed my job, my lifestyle, my phone number, everything.

But not even 1 minute of talking to him ruined all of this.

"Seohyun!" Someone interuppted my thoughts.

I looked up from all the papers spread across my desk to see Woohyun smiling and walking towards the office.

"Hey," I gave him a smile and a wave.

Woohyun. Nam Woohyun. He worked at the same office as me and we sometimes rode the bus to work together. He was sweet, handsome, and we had a lot of things in common. We sort of clicked when we first met each other. He was actually the only boy I talked to after Myungsoo; except for Hoya of course.

"I was wondering if -" the ringing of my phone cut him off. I looked at him and he nodded, "Take it."

I picked the phone up to hear the receptionist say that someone was looking for me. "You can send them up," I said and hung up, turning back to Woohyun, "Sorry."

"It's okay. So I was wondering if we could-" And I didn't listen to the rest of that sentence. Why? Because Myungsoo was walking up to us with a fiery, determined look in his eyes that scared me.

"Seohyun? Are you listening?" Woohyun asked slowly. I blinked and just stared behind Woohyun's shoulder at Myungsoo's figure coming closer. Woohyun followed my gaze and turned around to see Myungsoo burning a hole in the back of his head with his eyes.

"Uhh," Woohyun said.

Myungsoo raised his eyebrows, "Who are you?"

Woohyun sensed the enmity and turned to me, "You know him?" He pointed to Myungsoo who looked at his finger disgustingly.

"Myungsoo why are you here?" I broke the two boys' glaring competition and looked at Myungsoo incredulously.

"Can I not be here?" Myungsoo asked.

"It's a bit sudden, isn't it?" I chose my words carefully. 

"You didn't give me your new phone number and I wanted to see you," Myungsoo said hesitantly.

Woohyun looked back and forth between Myungsoo and I who were staring at each other deeply in the eyes.

"I'll go," Woohyun said, breaking the tension like glass, awkwardly waving "bye" to me. I opened my mouth to hold him back but then closed it again, drawing my hand back to my body, watching his retreating figure.

The pressure between Myungsoo and I was so great, the anxiousness so immense and the cursed history between us so long and vacillating. Who would know that we were connected together by a strong- yet thin string that was embedded with memories and heartbreak laced between its threads? Who knew that we had such a past, that our names were written down in each others' stories... Who knew that the paths behind us had each other intertwined in them?Myungsoo turned to me., "I-"

THe mere name Myungsoo had so much meaning to it.

"Missed you?" I finished for him, plastering an awry smile across my face.

"Yeah," Myungsoo breathed.

".... Is he your boyfriend?" Myungsoo asked- he meant Woohyun.

I didn't answer and just left the question open. He wasn't my boyfriend, but he was more than just a friend. We stared at each other some more. It was weird looking at him straight in the face. I mean, I saw him during my day off but it was dark and I couldn't see his face that well. But now that I looked, he didn't change much.

"I just wanted to know how you were doing," Myungsoo broke the silence once again.

I searched my scattered brain for other synonyms for the simple word "good", for some reason it seemed too plain.

"Managable," I finally replied.

"Are you happy?" Myungsoo looked at me with traces of suspicion written on his face.

"Yeah," I nodded.

Myungsoo sighed after another moment of silence, "Why is this so awkward?"

"Cause it's us," I responded with a small chuckle.

"..Us," Myungsoo repeated like the word was extinct, part of the past- which it was.

Yet still, that one syllable word danced off his tongue and pranced upon my ear, shaking my heart. Us.

We were greeted by silence again, "How have you been?"

"Tolerable," Myungsoo said with his usual straight expression.

"How's your photography going?" I asked.

"I got fired for not showing up," Myungsoo rubbed the back of his neck.

I opened my mouth and started to scold him but I stopped myself. I wasn't his girlfriend anymore and I definitely didn't want to start the whole I-am-a-helpless-girl-in-love-who-can't-get-over-her-cheating-boyfriend thing.

No sir not me.

So instead I just gave a sympathetic nod to Myungsoo's surprise. I wanted to ask him if I he had a girlfriend. If he was still with that girl he cheated with me on. But I decided that that would be inappropriate. And besides, I still didn't want to admit to myself that he had cheat on me.

"Are you busy later today?" Myungsoo asked.

"No, why?"

"I was wondering if you wanted to go down to Incheon with me today," he mumbled.

I titled my head. Incheon? Why Inch-

Oh yeah. I quickly searched my head. What was the date today? December 17? December 18? --No it was the 19th- Myungsoo's mom's deathday.

I quickly looked up into Myungsoo's eyes and nodded, giving him an ill smile. So THAT'S why he came to see me.

"I'll pick you up," he said.

"D'you know where I live?" I asked.

"Oh yeah," Myungsoo sheepishly shook his head "no" and I told him that I'd text him my address.

"See you soon, then," Myungsoo saluted.

_________________________

"Wait, Seohyun," Woohyun called as I was leaving the office. I heard him and turned back and gave him a wave goodbye but didn't wait for him. Myungsoo was coming to my house in about 20 minutes and I didn't want him to wait for me.

I rushed into a taxi and jittered all the way home.

"Something important going on today?" the taxi driver grinned.

"Kinda," I answered, anxiously looking out the window, cursing the traffic. When we finally got to my apartment I sprinted up the stairs instead of the elevator and changed into jeans and a huge sweatshirt, stuffing two days worth of clothes into a small suitcase and throwing in toiletries.

"Done," I huffed. Just then, the doorbell rang.

"Ready?" Myungsoo asked.

I nodded and he carried my bag for me as we went down the elevator into his car.

"Thanks for coming," Myungsoo said as he was backing his car.

"No problem," I smiled. Even if Myungsoo and I weren't together, I still felt like I had to pay my respects to his mother, even if I hadn't even seen her before. It was sort of a tradition of ours to see his mother on her deathday, ever since the first year we were together. Only a couple of Myungsoo's closest friends knew about his mother and if they did, they never got to see her.

Myungsoo was close to his mom until she passed away. He showed countless pictures of her smiling gracefully into the camera with little Myungsoo, holding him lovingly. She was like the mother I never had.

"You should sleep," Myungsoo said, keeping his eyes on the road.

"No, it's okay. I don't want you to be bored," I said, tucking my hands under my knees.

"Well, your not going to talk anyway, are you?" Myungsoo chuckled, "Don't worry, I won't get bored. You look tired and I dragged you here. You should get your sleep."

"But I wanted to come," I insisted.

Myungsoo just gave a small smile and concentrated on the black road ahead of us.

The car ride was quiet but it wasn't awkward like before but serene. The fact that we were going to commemorate Myungsoo's mom's death served as an excuse to be with each other again.

By the time we got to the quiet gravestone, it was pitch dark. There were a few eerie lamps here and there that illuminated a dull yellow streak of light through the night but didn't help in guiding us through the bumpy turf underneath our feet.

"Here," Myungsoo said as we stopped infront of his mother's gravestone.

"I know," I breathed. He looked at me as I kneeled down and smiled.

"Hi mom. How have you been? I'm sorry we haven't been visiting as much. We were busy and went our seperate ways. But don't worry. it was for the best and we're both happy now," I smiled.

Myungsoo's POV:

Seohyun talked to my mother's gravestone as if it was her own mother. She had that loving gaze in her eyes she used to give me all the time.

"Come on, pay your respects," Seohyun urged from her knees.

"Wha- Oh, okay," I said, kneeling down.

"Hi mom," I smiled. I started to "talk" to her but it oddly seemed as if she was upset at me. I know. My mom's dead. But still... I could imagine her scolding me for letting go of Seohyun. I remember when mom told me to find someone I loved and never let them go. Even if she never saw Seohyun through anything else but the glassy eyes of the gravestone, I felt as if mom would've loved Seohyun.

"You okay?" Seohyun asked as she cleaned up some of the fallen leaves off the floor around the gravestone.

"Yeah," I said. Seohyun reached over and gave me a light pat on my back.

Come on.

Come on.

I could hear my mom tell me.

Go get her back.

----------------------------------------------

i think i'm going to pat myself on the back for updating instead of study for my last midterm.. LOL.
thank you guys so much. I REACHED 103 SUBSCRIBERS :O
i would never have imagined! (': thank all 103 of you very much. its the first time i've reached 100 subscribers before!
i'm sorry i didn't update sooner but if you guys read my blog post;; i had midterms to study for. if i post a blog, it's probably something semi- important so please try to read it. thanks (:

<3 한나.