Changmin's P.O.V.


Once I got dressed I went downstairs. Only to find Junsu finishing dinner. I walked into the kitchen and leaned against the wall watching him.

"So, you're the one who rules the kitchen here, or something?" I asked after a couple of moments of silence. I must've startled him, since he quickly turned around, jumping a bit in the process.

"You did it again." He laughed and then nodded. "Yeah, usually I'm the one that cooks. Yoochun is not much of a cooking type although he can make some basic stuff. Like really basic." He said smiling. "Besides, he doesn't need to learn with me around."

I nodded not really knowing what else to say. I've never been known for my social abilities, actually, people always put me into nerds, people in love with books, the ones with brain and awesome grades. People that had a brilliant future, but miserable high school days, loners and outcasts. Unpopular people. It was probably my fault, I should've fought for better status and friends. In the end it didn't bother me. The label 'nerd' didn't mean a thing to me. But the fact that I didn't have many friends, and by 'many' I mean none, that was just sad. No, I wasn't drowning in self pity. I always had my ways to compensate all those things people my age used to do while I... well, didn't. Let's just say that I worked on myself. I worked to become better then everyone else. At one thing. Using my brain.

The day I decided to come back to Korea was the day I started to completely change my life. Turn it upside down and forget everything I used to be. I wasn't sure how I'm gonna do it, but I was firm in my decision. My parents were surprised, but pleased. They wanted me to learn my native language better and get to know Korean culture along the way. Talking about returning to my roots or something along those lines. It didn't take much to persuade them into sending me here. Especially since their best friends' sons were here, I got myself a place to live. Now the only thing that worried me were those guys. I had no idea what to expect and I was extremely nervous on the way here, for the first time wondering if I'm doing the right thing. The moment I saw Junsu I knew I wasn't wrong. The moment I saw my new house I knew I came home.


Junsu's P.O.V.


Changmin surprised me again. That guy moves so smoothly, like a cat. No one can hear him or sense his presence. It's actually kind of scary. But as I turned around he greeted me with his famous warm smile. And to think that girls will go crazy because of it. I guess Yoochunnie got himself a competition. I just couldn't help but smile back.

I finished our meal in a bit and put it on the table, then sat down and motioned for Changmin to join me.

"This is your house too now. Just do whatever you feel like doing." I said smiling. In his movements and actions I recognized a hint of that well education his parents must've given to him, just like our parents did. And as soon as our parents went to USA we forgot all about it and started acting like pigs. I mean, look at Yoochun's room. At least I'm trying to look and act decent. Yeah, yeah, of course I'm joking. I have to mock my hyung a little bit. Good thing he's not here.

We started eating and silence filled the kitchen all over again. However I didn't feel a bit awkward. I felt like Changmin and I grew up together, spending every evening eating our dinner just like this. In silence and quick glances from time to time. Suddenly I stopped eating and looked at my new friend.

"Hey, you won't mind if I ask you a question?" I said.

"Um, of course not. What is it?" he asked back clearly surprised and probably curious. I know I would be if someone asked me the same thing.

"Well... don't get me wrong... but umm... can I change your looks? I mean, little stuff... like your hair, your glasses, your clothes... you know, nothing big." I said giving him a goofy grin and hoping he won't feel offended or something. Afterall, we just met.

He blinked a few times like he was processing what I just said. He didn't look mad nor offended. At least not yet. I hoped it'll stay that way.

"You mean like... makeover?" he asked. Wow, and here I thought he's the smart one. It took him a while to get that.

"Yeah, I didn't mean to call it that way, but okay, I guess that's the right word." I nodded. I still waited for his answer. I actually became quite anxious as moments passed. Is it that hard to trust me? I mean, look at me, I look... innocent. Right? I won't ruin his precious appearance, I can only make it better. I noticed him checking me out like he was looking for some kind of flaw on me. Something he didn't want to see on himself. "Trust me, I won't make you look like a freak." I couldn't help but say.

He chuckled. "Okay." He simply said and shrugged, then continued to eat.

Okay? He agreed just like that? Wow, this is gonna be easier then I thought.

"But I'll have to like be in control of everything, I can back away any time I want and I have to see everything that's going on with my hair, clothes... what are you going to do with my glasses?"

Ha, just when I thought it'll be easy. Well, what did I expect? He's not dumb. Actually, he's probably everything but dumb. He's a geek afterall.

"Of course, just trust me. I think we have to get rid of that nerdy image you have. As for glasses, I'll buy you lenses." I started to ramble. I always did that when I got excited. And it's been a while since something made me this excited. Come on, I'm gonna transform this geek into a hot guy. What's better then that?


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


The music in this place is intoxicating. Or maybe it's just me. I can't drink anymore, I actually think I might be sick. I finished another bottle of soju as I turned around to look for Yunho. Of course, he rules that dance floor. I can clearly see him in the center of it, showing off his amazing dance moves. All the girls around are gasping looking at him lovingly. Makes me even more sick. He finally moved, grabbing one of them and started dancing with her. She's gonna pass out any time now. Happiness. God, can she be more shallow? They all are. It looks like their only goal in life is getting one of us. Yunho, me... even those Park jerks. I mean, who would want to get them? Oh yeah, stupid girls. They're not even hot.

I finally got up. Happiness is one thing I won't get in this life. Not after she left me. The whole world collapsed with her saying good bye to me and leaving without an explanation. She didn't deserve me. Everyone kept saying that to me ever since. But I know that's not true. She was the one. Shut up, Jae, you don't know what you're saying. Drunk bastard. That's what I am. That's what I became – what left out of me. I used to be happy. I won't experience it again. I know it's impossible.

I walked to the dance floor. Surprisingly, I could still walk. Am I drunk enough? Oh who cares. Hyung will kill me when I get home. He's always so protective. Well, he couldn't protect me from getting hurt, could he? Stupid hyung. He doesn't deserve to be called that. Lee Jun Ki. You should've kept your eye on me, you should've known she's just another bit.ch. I'm your dongsaeng, why couldn't you protect me from her? Why couldn't you stop me from falling so hard. Damn you. That's what you get tonight, a drunk @sshole for brother. You'll still tuck me into bed, right? Of course you will, just like you used to when we were kids.

I looked at Yunho and flashed him a smile. He looked at me weirdly, but quickly turned to his next victim. Lucky girl. Ha, yeah right. He'll use you sl.ut. That's what you're here for, right? And tomorrow you'll be able to say that you slept with Jung Yunho. Your friends will be so proud of you. I swear we're surrounded with retarded people.

I started dancing. Have you noticed how I'm using word I all the time? Yes, I'm conceited jerk, call me that and nothing else. Bitter conceited jerk. Does that make me different? I hope so. Or not. I shouldn't be different. Maybe even those Park boys are better then me. After what had happened I bet they are.

There's a girl looking at me. What do you want bit.ch? A piece of me? Come on, you can have it. Just for tonight. I pulled her closer and continued to dance. She seems happy. Well, as long as you are, I am too. Yeah, right. I moved my hand down her back and pulled her even closer. I inhaled deeply as my chest crashed against her s. Wait. What kind of girl is this? She's so flat. And she doesn't smell like a girl. She smells like a guy. I looked up. God, I am dancing with a guy. And the next thing I knew... the guy kissed me. On the lips. And I kissed him back. Scr.ew this all...


Yunho's P.O.V.


Finally someone who knows how to dance. This girl is not bad at all. I watched her swaying her hips to the rhythm of the music. That was hot. I pulled her closer, but then she gasped. I looked down, but she wasn't even looking at me. Instead she's looking at something behind me. Then I noticed she wasn't the only one. The whole club was staring at something behind me. What's going on, what am I missing?

I turned around finally. Only to see JaeJoong making out with... another guy?


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


I don't really know what's going on, but I'm actually enjoying this. This guy's lips are so soft and he's such a good kisser, I just don't want to stop. I could feel his hands exploring my body and I moaned softly. I haven't felt such satisfaction in a long time. Moving my hand up his back I deepend the kiss and just then it hit me. We're in club, in the middle of the dance floor and it's abnormally quiet. I quickly pushed the guy off me and looked around. Everyone, and I mean every single soul in the club, was staring at me. Including my best friend. Yunho.


Yunho's P.O.V.


Unbelievable. I just can't believe what I'm seeing. Is that really JaeJoong? In the arms of a man? God, that is disgusting. Okay, I wouldn't exactly refer to my best friend as disgusting, but that sight was just disturbing. I won't be able to live normally with that picture permanently memorized in my head. Oh well, I guess I'll do my best to erase it from my memory.

JaeJoong finally broke it off. What happened to him? Was he too drunk to make a difference between a girl and a guy? No way, no one can be that drunk. Great, now we're staring at each other. What? Do you want me to do something? I don't know. I don't know what to do to help you now Jae. Well, look at it this way, now you'll be able to get rid of all those annoying girls running after you. That's what you wanted right?


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


Jae, do something. Just don't stand there.

So, I ran out of the club. I ran as fast as I could. I wasn't drunk anymore, I got completely sober all of the sudden. Must be the shock. And this sick mixture of feelings. What the hell is going on with me?

I ran until I reached my house, then walked in, trying to calm myself. I didn't want hyung to ask any questions. I came home pretty early anyway. I walked into the living room and saw Jun Ki watching tv. I smiled, then went to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water.


JunKi's P.O.V.


"Jae?" I called as he disappeared into the kitchen. I saw him coming back almost instantly.

"Did something happen?" I asked concerned. I haven't seen him this upset ever since he saw our dog dying. And that was like, eight years ago.

I knew something was wrong. He was trying to hide it, but I know him too well. I also knew he'll tell me. I just needed to wait patiently for it to happen.

"Nothing." He replied too quickly, but I could see he was swallowing hard and slightly sweating.

"Are you okay? Are you sick?" I asked suddenly. He really looked sick. "How much did you drink?"

"A lot. But I'm not sick. I'm sober." He replied looking straight ahead of him.

I reached out for him, but as soon as I touched his shoulder he shivered. He looked scared. Me on the other hand, I was getting extremely worried. I pulled away and just stared at him.

"God, don't stare. I'm sick of people staring at me." He yelled suddenly and got up, then stormed out of the room and upstairs, probably into his room. I turned off tv and followed him slowly.


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


How could I tell him? I didn't want him to think I'm gay. I can't be. I mean, I love girls. I loved her. But then, why was I so attracted to that guy the moment he touched me? No, no, I just needed someone at the moment and the guy appeared to be there. Stop talking nonsense Jae, of course you loved making out with a guy. Oh god, what's happening to me?

I heard JunKi walking up to my room and knocking on the door. The next thing I knew he was standing in front of me. He never waits for me to tell him to come in. That's so annoying. Especially in moments like this.

"Tell me what happened." He said sitting down next to me. I moved away a little bit. I felt like I'll suddenly feel attracted to him, which was sick. Even for a gay guy. Which I'm not.

"I... I..." I knew I had to tell him. He wouldn't judge me, right? He's stuck with me, since he's my hyung. Yeah, I can tell him. But I'm still not so sure. Besides, what's there to tell? Oh yes, what happened. "I got drunk and I kind of made out with a guy." I let it all out at once, then closed my eyes. I don't know what I expected from him to do. I just didn't want to see him at this moment. I was too embarrassed and afraid of his reaction.

He didn't say a thing. Instead he pulled me into a hug.


JunKi's P.O.V.


I held him. I knew that was the only thing that I could do to make him feel better. Well, maybe not exactly better, but I just wanted to let him know that I'm there for him no matter what. He didn't pull away and that was a good sign. I felt him relax a bit. After a couple of moments I pulled away and looked at him.

"You're afraid you're gay?" I asked looking into his eyes. I already knew the answer. He didn't have to speak, it was normal. I went through that too. He just didn't know. Maybe it was time for him to find out.


JaeJoong's P.O.V.


I looked at him like he was dumb. Of course I'm afraid I'm gay. Wait, how come he's so calm about this? I'm freaking out here. Didn't he hear me? I kissed a guy! And he's already asking me if I'm gay. No, wait, that's not what he asked.

"Yeah." I replied quietly. The next thing he did shocked me. He laughed.

"Umma and appa will be proud when they find out." He said sarcastically. I understood that laugh was actually full of bitterness. It reminds me of myself actually. It's not something hyung would do.It sounded like me.

"Thanks a lot Jun Ki." I said annoyed and scooted away from him again. Of course I was offended. The last thing I needed now is for my brother to mock me. It wasn't funny at all.

"No, that's not what I meant." Hyung started again and I looked at him.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm gay too."