The next morning, I woke up and saw tons of text and miscalls from him, and I ignored it, before taking my bath and going to the class. Overall, for the rest of the class, I was agitated, Mad, to be precise. I can’t focus on my study and lectures and I didn’t even realize he called again and again.

“Belle, aren’t you going to answer that? Mia asked, irritated by the buzzing sound. I looked at the caller and rolled my eyes before putting it in my bag.

“You seem distracted. You got probs?” She asked again and I shook my head.

“No, no.. Just the usual daily stress.” I replied and faked a smile. She nodded and continued with her study. I wonder will he get bored and stopped contacting me anymore. With that single thought, my heart suddenly beats faster and it’s aching badly.

If I am no matter for him, it's better I know it sooner that later. I nodded absently and flipped through the books. It is sure going to be hard to resist answering it.

Today marks one week since our quarrel. Part of me wanted to forgive him, but my ego says no. He should have told me everything. I thought he was serious with the commitment just like I do, but evidently, he wasn’t.

Ego. That’s such a small word that meant a lot.

“Do you love me?” He asked and my eyebrows knitted.

“Hyun? What’s wrong?” I replied.

“You know that I really adore you, right?” He continued.

“And no matter what, please don’t turn back at me. “ He whispered.

“What? Hyun….” I tried to laugh.

“Please. Don’t leave. For I am who I am, and this is me.” He said and my laugh hanged.

Another day, another text. He has been trying to contact me since the fight, texting tons of message, emails, and calls. I just read and ignored it. I am still mad at him, but after a while, I didn’t anymore. It is not that important if he is a superstar or what so ever. He is still in my heart, no matter what the hurdles are. Now, that I think of it.

And to top it off, I’m still madly in love with him.

I decided to take a day off from the university life and returned back to my house, moping and shuffling like a living dead. I placed the phone on the dressing table in my room, set it to the loudest tone and waited around, hoping for a call or a text to come in. I stayed in my room, sneering and gritting my teeth if anyone dares to talk to me.

When the grandfather clock in the living room down stair strikes 7, I was half worried, half mad. No text since morning, or calls (not that I will pick them up). Is this means that he gave up on me? I thought for a while and shivered for the fact if I lose him. I sighed and went down stairs for my dinner, eating  alone and climbed back to my room, still refusing to talk to anyone. 

This goes one for the whole weekend, and suddenly, it's Sunday evening. 

Tomorrow, I will have to go back to the University. It's Monday. I can't skip my classes anymore. I decided that, maybe, it was not meant to be. I closed my eyes and stopped thinking for a while.

My hand shook terribly and I made one last attempt to look at my phone, before crying and I pushed the phone away.

It's over. I lay under the covers and I lost track of time. I didn’t know whether I had fallen asleep or not, but I wake up late at night, almost 3.

After sitting on the bed, thinking. I guess, maybe it’s the best for us to take a break for a while. I guess he might need it. I took my phone and create a new message to him. But not knowing what to say, I cancelled the thought.

I my laptop and check on my Facebook, trying to push him away out of my head. After a browsing and stalking through the pages, a notification finally popped out and it is from Mia. She shared an article from AllKpop. I read it through and through and I clicked on the title.

T.O.P faced an accident during filming.

I read the article over and over again before it came to my senses.

Hundreds of comment spammed the end of the page, wishing him well and the picture of him being escorted out of a building made my heart stopped.

 He was doing a combat scene this morning when he hit a glass window, injured. It was said to be a pretty bad one, since he was hospitalized and will only achieve full recovery after 2-3 weeks.

“Please, don’t run away from me.”

After I finished reading it, I realized that I was holding my breath and my heart beat fast. I shoved the laptop away and took my phone, before pushing the call button. I tried a few times but there was no answer. I gave up and left the phone on the table before curling in the bed, thinking.

No calls, no texts, he ought to tell me. He should tell me that I should stop the anger and he is in pain. Or maybe he can’t. Because he knew, I would not answer the calls.

I tried to call him again, this time, it entered the voice mail. I hung up and put my hands on my forehead. I’m sweating, even though the aircon was on. My sister was not next to me. Maybe she went out having a sleepover at her friend's house. Tumbling in the bed, I couldn’t continue my sleep and I kept staring at the ceiling. Finally, I gave up on trying to sleep.

I sat  up, and I realized outside is still dark, and  I looked at the alarm clock. It’s already 7 am. But the cloud looked dark and heavy. It will be raining soon. I pushed the cover away, walking to the bathroom and washed my face.

As I was staring at my own reflection, half awake, the eye bag was vivid. Anyone who sees me will definitely knew I was up all night, and my eyes were faint red. For a while, I looked at my face, more to dreaming, reminiscing about our moments together.

I won't let him go. I won't leave him. But, is it wise? Once he cheated on me, he will do it again next time. But, why did he lie? What will be different, if I knew that he was an artist from the beginning? He saved my life.

Publicity. Fame. Good deeds in the eyes of the public. That will be the thing that I will assume if he had told me that he is an artist. Maybe, it’s unavoidable. Because he knew that I will distance myself, for the sake of his reputation of an artist.

 I heard the ringtone on my phone, and I didn’t remember setting up any alarm. I walked dazedly out of my room,  and took the phone, and pushed some random button.

“Hey.” A hoarse voice greeted me. I almost fell to the floor, but I held myself, trying to stand straight. Finally, after 3 days of arguing and missing him, he’s here.

I sobbed and waited for him to talk.

“How dare you.” I gave up, after moments of waiting for his words.

“How dare you gave up on me” I cried and the line was silent.

“I haven’t. “ He replied and I felt like I was showered down with cold water.

“I tried to call you, but I can’t. People just wanted me to stay in bed, having a rest, and took away my phone.” He continued.

“Still, I’m mad at you.” I said and he scoffed. “You know how many times I tried to call you? To check on you? Much after the news I read, and I’m worried sick. Gosh. I hate you.”

“I’m sorry.” He replied. “For everything. For lying to you, for making you concerned, for everything. “ It's my turn to be silent.

“I just… I wanted someone who sees me, as who I really am. Who treated me like a normal man. Not a celebrity. Who is in love with me, not for the image on the screen, but the real me. “ He added.

“I’m sorry if you felt offended, you know, not knowing of what I really am, but really, I can't let you go. You can hate me, and leave me, but I won't. ”

"Hyun..."