"What?" Jenna didn't really hear it.

 

"I did, actually.. Fall for him." You look at her and laughing by yourself. "For almost a whole day."

 

"Really?? Then what about Siwon??"

 

You smile, "No, it just a really silly of me. He friend-zoned me at the first time we meet so.. Haha nothing developed anyway.." You suddenly remember the first time you met at his concert. Nothing really stand out about him that day except that you met his parent and he was so rude, Siwon outshone everybody that day. 

 

But the Kyuhyun who take you home and talk to you comfortably like you were his old friend in the middle of the most awkward situation possible, is the Kyuhyun that you will admire forever.

 

"How did he friendzoned you?"

 

"He just.. I don't know, rude, and treat me like his old friend or something. I mean, in the moment when I still nervous being with a stranger like him or their manager, he's being totally comfortable and talk informal just in a few hours after we met. And it's really comfortable around him." You answer this while staring at the road. "It's not like I secretly have a crush on him or something.. No way. It just.." As the memory flash back to your mind you, yourself, got more amaze by your friend. "He's a genius in everything, there's nothing he can't do if he wants to. But his existence never intimidate the others. That's why he's fun to be around with."

 

Jenna laughs, "You still got that chance to be my friend and let Siwon go and be with Kyuhyun. Or you should marry Siwon for good and I'll change bias to Kyuhyun."

 

You laughing back. "I think everything is going to be so much easier if I'm with Kyuhyun oppa, but I'm not even Siwon's right now. So.."

 

"Yeah keep telling me that.. I will forever bear in mind that I'm both Siwon's and Kyuhyun's."

 

Thanks to this hardcore Siwon's stand (and maybe soon enough going to change to become Kyuhyun's stand soon) beside you that keep talking about Siwon although you've tried your hard not to think about him anymore.

 

"Weirdly.." You continue, although it seems that you're talking to yourself, "... no matter I might be in love with Siwon oppa, Kyuhyun oppa still my bias. Even in a concert, instead of Siwon, I'll be easily spotted where Kyuhyun is."

 

"Ah!! That's right!! You even watch that whole 20 episode of Moon that embracing the sun just to been able to understand the musical. You never even went through more than 3 episode of new girl or gossip girl or even CSI or Sherlock although you really love those shows." Jenna pouts and thinks about something else.

 

"Yeah.. I started to paint again because of him, I even watch his others shows. Damn.." You exhale, "I'm that such fans."

 

"Ehmm.. Welcome to the fandom." Jenna pats you like she's a grandmother or something. "So tell me what happen between you and Siwon. Where did you guys meet? How far is your relationship? We're-just-dating-far or we're-pretty-serious-but-fans-shouldn't-know-about-this-far or he-wants-to-get-married-but-his-contract-wouldn't-allowed-far?"

 

You laugh but then sigh before spread all the fact to Jenna, "None of them.. To be honest, right now both of us never really clarify in which state do we dwell in. But all of it started when our moms knew each other since I'm still in middle school, if I'm not mistaken.."

 

"Really?? And for all this time, you knew I like him, you never told me anything about this??"

 

"Well I tried to even forget that I'm Korean. If you didn't know it yet.."

 

"So you knew him eversince??"

 

"Yes but I just knew him.. We met a couple of time when I'm in high school and he just started with the Super Junior things, but nothing happend. It just after I moved here from LA, I met him again, innocently, and all was just about being in a good relation. Then things got escalated, we went on several date, at first, we just really enjoying everything that happening between us, without so much thought. And then our moms, that trying to get us dating since I'm still in high school, knew about it and interfered and they often set up our date. After that, sometime I just confused, whether he really want us to be together or is it just because his mom told him to. Like our own internal problem wasn't enough get me crazy."

 

"He's still a celebrity."

 

"Exactly.." You sigh. "Anyone from my gym, my office, they just speculate things and say mean things behind my back. That's when I haven't even formally going out with him. Some said that what am I doing playing with someone who dance and lipsync like that, like he's out of our league. But when I see the reality just like we witnessed not too long ago.. It's the other way around, who am I, think that I can casually date him. It's me who out of his leagues." You're deflated by your own thought.

 

Jenna rubs your back, comforting.

 

"The two sides will be in loss, in any other way. So I just.. I think it's better for us to being away.."

 

"Well, all of this would be a nice background story once you're married with him." Jenna is in shipping mode.

 

"Will you come to my wedding then? As his fan?" You nudge her waist.

 

"Oh I forgot I should be your anti.."

 

 

 

 **

 

 

 

"Why?" Kyuhyun laughs, seeing you pout all day.

 

You don't answer him and keep walking ahead of him to the car. Amused, Kyuhyun laughs again and hold your hand, slightly pull your hand so you stop walking.

 

"Why? What happen? Did I irritate you?" Kyuhyun gently pull your hand again so you face him.

 

"No.." You look at you shoe, avoiding his eyes.

 

"So why?" He touches your chin and bring your face so you directly look at him.

 

Seeing his bright face you couldn't help it but spill all out.

 

"Oppa, are you that happy? You finally had the chance to kiss the girl of your life, is that make you this happy? You always in good mood these few days."

 

"Eng.." Kyuhyun smiles, giving an ensure tone.

 

"Good for you then." You walk back to the cars and once you almost touch the car door, Kyuhyun holds you back again and faces you.

 

"Jealous?" He seems too amused, you hate how will every possible answers you had in your mind turn to be amused him more. So you just back up and try to reach the car door.

 

But Kyuhyun seems not in the mood for ending things up, so he reaches your hand again until you face him. He cups your face in his palm and takes his time to look at your face before he kissed your forehead.

 

Your heart beat so fast, you can actually hear it.

 

It's like the time stop, and you can feel every single detail that happen.

 

You can feel Kyuhyun pinky finger just below your jawline as he cups you in. You can see his barely visible stubble as his chin slowly get close to your eyes. His lower lip that touch your forehead first before his upper lip. And when he press them down, you can tell it slightly wet.

 

And you can feel the feeling of 'your-heart-that-dropped-to-your-belly' that you haven't felt for so long.

 

He pulls away slowly.

 

And when his eyes meet yours, you behold the sweetest smile you ever saw. Like, even if you just see it once, it probably could make your month brighter. It was so sincere.

 

Your heart flutter.

 

And you smile at him, unconsciously.

 

But when you can get back to your straight mind, you shake it off and hit his chest instead.

 

"What's that oppa?"

 

He just smiles and holds your hand, leading you to the car.

 

And when you look at him, frowning, he rubs your hair like usual. "Aish, this kid.."

 

As he takes his time to start the car, you just sat there, in silent.

 

Something that you think is forever be innocently platonic isn't the way it should be anymore.

 

For the first time in forever, you wavered.