my love is hurt.

“How long is she going to stay like this?” Luhan grimaced as they all sat down in Miyoon’s living room.

The host of the house was currently stuck in her room, rolled up into a ball on her bed. She had been in that position for the last week, doing nothing but crying to her heart’s content while her mind repeated Hoya’s finals words over and over again like a song on repeat.

After the whole Hoya and Kyungmi fiasco, all six of her geges and her new official sister-in-law decided it was best to return to the city with Miyoon. They didn’t think she would try anything insane like suicide because of it but they knew she was going to need shoulders to lean on and support to keep her on her feet.

They were all stagnant at how heartbroken she was for they had never seen her in such a state. Hoya must have meant more to her than any of them could have imagined and that worried them a great deal. They didn’t really know how to handle this delicate topic since Miyoon had never acted this way before but that didn’t stop them from trying.

“I don’t even know. I mean that guy was a complete douchebag. Why doesn’t she just get over him? We can set her up with guys a hundred times better than him.” Chen spat angrily.

“Seriously, though. How did we even approve of scum like him?” Lay added, which was a surprise since he was one of the nicer ones.

“Duizhang, you should have allowed me to beat the crap out of him. He deserves it.” Tao sniggered as he crossed his arms against his chest and sunk into his seat, fuming.

“If you did, mei would have probably stopped you and scolded you instead of him.” Kris pointed out bluntly. “Even after he treated her the way he did, even after he broke her heart cruelly and confessed to the world that they were nothing more than a play, she’s still crying over him. What can we do?”

“But I don’t like seeing Xiamei this sad. Why can’t she always be happy like when she was younger?” Xiumin pouted.

“You men are always so clueless.” Yunhee sighed as she got up, shaking her head. “When it comes to the man a woman loves, no matter how much pain he puts her through, she will continue to love him and that is what’s happening with Xiazi. By this point, she probably isn’t even crying and sulking over Hoya anymore. She’s most likely still in this state because even though he broke her heart, she still loves him and that’s what's scaring her.”

None of them spoke up and Yunhee exhaled again. “I think it’s safe now if I go and talk to her. If she’s hurting, she should let it out instead of crying like this. Talking could be the best solution for times of adversity like this. But don’t you guys dare eavesdrop or I’ll kill you with my own two hands and I mean it.” She warned.

Kris wanted to protest and join his wife as well but the stern and pointed look she sent him rendered him useless as he remained in his seat. He was aware Yunhee knew what she was talking about because she had gone through just as many heart-wrenching events as Miyoon, perhaps even more harsh, and he could only pray that she would be the one who could talk some sense back into his baby sister.

Because it was clear as hell that the six men couldn’t do anything other than wanting to physically abuse and harm the source of her pain. 

“Xiaxia,” Yunhee spoke out softly as she knocked on the bedroom door. When there was nothing but sniffles coming through, she turned the knob and granted herself entrance.

The room was dim but not completely pitched black. From the curtains draping over the windows, sunlight had breached the area and thankfully enough Yunhee was able to see and make her way safely to the bed.

She had closed the door behind her and her insides felt as though it was being eaten as Miyoon continued to sniffle and whimper quietly. How could such a strong woman become such a weak girl all because of a man? Lee Howon, we trusted you with her. How could you do such a thing?

Although, Yunhee had remained level-headed and reserved about everything, internally speaking she was experiencing the same emotions as the rest of the guys. She just decided to be the calm and mature one about it. But now that she was standing right besides Miyoon, she couldn’t help but become angry. Her hands clutched onto the sides of her shorts as she clenched her jaw.

The weeping did not stop though and presently, Yunhee’s tensed body relaxed and eased up. She couldn’t get angry at the moment. Her main objective was to get Miyoon to vent.

Get her to express her emotions and thoughts verbally so that burdensome pain could be put to rest.

Wearily, she sat on the bed and placed a gentle hand on Miyoon’s back. She rubbed soothing circles but that did not put an end to the sobbing. For a minute or two, Yunhee just sat there repeating her actions until Miyoon croaked out, “Go away, gege. I don’t want to eat.” Then she shifted and moved out and away from her touch.

“Xiaxia, it’s me.” she announced as she held onto her shoulder and turned her over. Yunhee found swollen red eyes and looked at Miyoon with a sorrowful gaze.

“Unnie,” she muttered tiredly. “Did it hurt a lot when Yifan broke your heart?”

Yunhee flinched at the memory but nonetheless nodded. “Geurae, it did hurt me dearly. It hurt me so much that I had changed myself into a cold and distant monster. I held the pain in for so long that I had become someone whom I didn’t even recognize in the mirror. Someone who disrespected the people she loved and I don’t want the same thing to happen to you, Xiazi. Because to tell you the truth, I had never felt more lonely than I did when I was hurt.”

Miyoon didn’t utter a word as she laid there, immobilized.

Yunhee brushed Miyoon’s hair down with her hand and stared at her amicably. “I know it hurts but holding it in and crying by yourself like this isn’t going to make it any better. If you’re mad at him say it out loud. Punch a pillow, break a plate but don’t stay silent. You have all of us here for you.”

“But what would doing those things do for me? Will it take away this scar on my heart? Will it reverse time? Will it bring him back to me? At the end of the day, I would only have a flattened pillow and broken plate.” She argued, sitting up.

“Xia, if we could rewind back time for you, you know your geges and I would do it within a heartbeat. Because seeing you like this, it hurts us too. We all love you and we really want to see you smile again. Your geges might not know how to deal with this since it’s quite emotional and sensitive but they’re trying.” Yunhee assured as she grabbed Miyoon’s hand and held it.

“Everyone is worried about you, even Myungsoo and—” she paused, unsure if she should continue and eventually she chose to. “Mr. and Mrs. Lee as well with Mrs. Park. They are concerned about your well-being, Xiazi. They wanted to visit but Yifan told them it wasn’t such a good idea for now especially with all the reporters still lurking about.”

“Abeonim, omonim, halmeoni.” Miyoon moped dully. “Why would they care about me if the girl he’s in love with is her? Why should they worry about me? I don’t want them to.”

“Don’t say things like that, Xiazi. They want you to get better too; if you want, you can go and see them if you’d like.” She suggested. Yunhee figured out that Miyoon had grown attached to Hoya’s family after all the time she had spent with them and seeing a few more friendly and loving faces wouldn’t cause harm.

Well, that’s what she was hoping. She knew there might be a risk of Miyoon falling deeper into the hole of despair and sadness created by Hoya if she saw them but she was willing to take it. It was better than nothing. She needed to do something, anything. And if Miyoon could stand to face the family of the man who crucified her heart, she could handle almost anything.

Miyoon really did miss them. “B-but what if I run into them there? What would happen to me then and all the reporters?”

“I’ll make sure they aren’t around. You’ll be okay, I promise. And Xia?”

“Hm?” she muffled in response.

“He isn’t in love with her. Words can be deceiving but one’s gaze can never lie.” Because the way he looked at you at Daejeon when you came with him that night… I could tell he had feelings for you. That he had loved you for a long time. Longer than you think and the hurt in his eyes when he showed up to the reception. There must be a misunderstanding. With relationships there always are.

“Abeonim, what are you watching? Don’t you get bored of watching old soccer games? They’re so lame unless of course, sunbae is playing.” Kyungmi nagged as she sat across from where Mr. Lee was stationed. She wasn’t even looking at the television screen as she stared at her phone, doing whatever it was that she had been doing for the last hour.

Mr. Lee turned to scowl at her as his nails clawed into the handles of his wheelchair. News of the newfound relationship was discovered a couple of days in the Lee household and let’s just say the unhappiest member in the house was not female. Is my idiotic son serious about this child? She’s supposed to be his biggest fan but she thinks soccer is lame? What in the name of hell has my son gotten himself into? And why is she calling me like that? I don’t think I granted you permission, little missy. Were the words running amuck in Mr. Lee’s mind.

“Why don’t we watch some dramas! They’re so much more interesting! They’ll leave you speechless!” she chimed and without waiting for a nod of approval, she switched the channel.

Mr. Lee’s face hardened at her word choice. Was she trying to mock him of his current dumb state?

Kyungmi was oblivious to his change of attitude as he spun around to leave. He was wheeling his way toward the exit when Hoya returned with three glasses of lemonade. “Oh, appa, where are you going?” he inquired.

Mr. Lee glared at him. Away from you and that thing. Aigoo, my Miyoon. Where is she now? She must be hurting because of you, you ungrateful child. How could you do this? I thought you weren’t going to let her go? How—how could you throw away your happiness in exchange for a girl who doesn’t even love the things you do? You really disappointed me, Howon. Not even giving him a nod, Mr. Lee left the vicinity and now it was Hoya’s face that darkened. His grasp on the tray carrying the refreshments grew firmer as he turned to find his father vanishing around a corner. He knew what this was about.

It was about Miyoon and at the thought of her, he was infuriated.

No one else was home at the moment since the women decided to go out grocery shopping and with no restraint left, Hoya threw the tray to the floor. The glass cups slammed into the hard floor and cracked into pieces. The liquid spilled out and Kyungmi jumped up from her seat. She skied to his side and gasped. “Omo, sunbae, gwenchaniyo? You’re not hurt, are you?” she started examining him and he grew only more agitated.

“Why are you doing this?” he questioned.

“W-wae?” Kyungmi stuttered, drawing back. “You dropped the tray and I just wanted to check if you were alright.” She answered.

“No,” he replied coldly. “I meant why were you willing to pretend to be my fake girlfriend? You know I don’t feel that way towards you but you still chose to help me. Why? Aren’t you worried about what other people will think of you?”

Kyungmi shook her head, “As long as I can be with you, nothing matters. Sunbae, you might not like me now but I really think you will grow to love me just as I love you in the future. I will make you forget about that wretched wench and the pain she caused you.” Her hand moved to graze his cheek but he abruptly looked away and stepped back.

“Did you say something to my father? Just now, he looked upset.”

“Ani, I didn’t say anything. I told him we should watch some dramas because it would definitely leave him speech—” her eyes widened in recognition of her mistake. She whirled around and was stunned to discover Mr. Lee was nowhere in sight. She hadn’t even noticed his absence until now.

“Please tell me you did not say speechless,” Hoya gritted, losing his tolerance all of a sudden.

“I-I didn’t mean it like that,” she defended.

Hoya ran his hand over his face and groaned. “I think it’s better if you leave. You’ve been here long enough.” He led her to the door and as she walked out, he caught sight of a few photographers. He mentally cursed them before leaning in and giving Kyungmi a quick hug.

Once he shut the door, Hoya slid down to the ground. His face was buried in his hands as he tried hard to control his emotions. Next, his head started banging lightly against the barrier separating him from the outside world. He closed his eyes but that did not last long because the first image that popped into his mind was a crestfallen photo of Miyoon.

His phone beeped and as he slowly took it out, he saw that it was a text message from Dongwoo.

[Received at 2:30pm]  Meet at the café Woohyun works for in thirty minutes. It’s important.

He thought about it and then replied with an ok. He didn’t know what was going on but as long as he was out of the house where everyone seemed to have despised him because of his rash actions, he was going to take it. As he got to his feet, he swayed to the side but luckily got his balance back by pressing a palm to the wall. Hoya glanced at the mess he had created before he sauntered to the kitchen. He grabbed the broom and some napkins.

It was the mess he had created and so he was going to be the one to clean it.

After tidying up after himself, Hoya heard the door open. He made his way over and found his mother and grandmother each with their arms full of grocery bags. His eyes rounded and he rushed over to assist them. “Here, let me get that for you, omma.” He extended his hands out to help her but Mrs. Lee pulled away.

She narrowed his eyes at him, “I’ve got it.” Then she pushed past him and into the kitchen. Mrs. Lee was struggling a bit but she refused to treat Hoya any kinder. He was wrong and she wasn’t going to condone the behaviors he had displayed to Miyoon. Ruthless and completely faultfinding. She didn’t know what happened but she was aware that the victim was Miyoon and the villain, her own son.

Hoya’s face fell as he hung his head low.

A mixture of emotions stirred up inside of him as he turned to look at his grandmother. She looked at him and then placed a couple of bags down. “Get that would you?” she requested softly before sighing and following her daughter’s footsteps.

The person who was the least ticked off by everything that happened was Mrs. Park. Sure, she wasn’t happy at what had occurred but it was not her problem. It was Hoya’s and Miyoon’s. If anyone should treat him icily it should be Miyoon. There wasn’t anything the elder could do but hope that everything would work out for everyone. She didn’t like the new awkward and brisk atmosphere in the house but again there was nothing she could do about it.

Hoya was grateful that at least somebody he loved wasn’t treating him like a criminal as he scooped up the bags and walked to the kitchen. His mother had already begun unpacking and stocking up the fridge. When he entered, he saw the stoic expression on her face, and knew he was not welcomed.

It wasn’t like she ignored him only because of his attitude towards Miyoon. It was also because when they first found out about Kyungmi and him, Mrs. Lee had tried to talk to him. Ask him what in the world was going on but he snapped and ignored her. It was rude of him to act that way especially towards his mother but he hadn’t been in his right mind and now he was regretting his stupidity.

“I’m going out to meet with some friends and after I think I’ll head to the stadium. You guys won’t have to wait for me during dinner. Enjoy,” Because I’m sure you all would prefer it if I wasn’t here. It would be easier for you guys to digest properly before you lose your appetite from looking at me.

Usually, Mrs. Lee would tell him to be safe and give him a hug but this time around, she didn’t do any of that. She just carried on with storing the items away and Hoya exhaled, dejectedly. He gathered his things and as he dragged himself to the front door, he could hear feet paddling against the floor behind him. He peered back and saw his grandmother scurrying over to him. “Don’t forget your water-bottle and eat something if you’re going to stay out late.” She handed him the bottle and Hoya cracked a tiny smile.

Then he enveloped his grand