all for you.

Don’t look back, Wu Xiazi. Don’t you dare look back. Miyoon ordered herself as her hands tightened around the steering wheel.

For a brief second the image of Myungsoo flashed into her mind, causing her to, vehemently, shake her head. Her eyes slammed shut and when there was a loud honk, she regained her sight to discover she was just about to cause a collision.

She swerved to the right, avoiding the other vehicle and heaved out a sigh of relief upon reaching safety. “I almost died.” She muttered. Miyoon then pulled over to the side of the road and allowed her skull to fall back onto the head-rest. Next, she stepped out of the car and recklessly kicked the tire. “Ouch!” she yelped in scrutinizing pain.

When the unpleasantness finally resided, her expression softened. Her entire body started to tremble at the memory of his desperate plea. At the moment, Miyoon was located on a bridge with a tiny stream flowing beneath it. She walked over to the rails and cupped her hands over in order to project her voice.

“Kim Myungsoo, you bad guy! Why can’t you leave my heart alone!” Miyoon shouted. She took a break to catch her breath, “I hate you! I hate you for making me fall in love with you! I don’t want to love you! And I won’t anymore!”

Once she had made her declaration, she felt breathless. Her arms slowly fell down to her side as they stayed there lifeless. “I can’t love you anymore. It hurts me too much.” She coughed out.

A gust of wind passed by causing the beautifully leafed branches of the spring weather to rustle softly. 

Miyoon’s hands moved to grip onto the railings as she dropped her lids, hindering her vision once again. You shouldn’t do this to yourself. You know it won’t ever work out. You know it, so you have to let go. It’s the best thing to do.

“I can’t love Xia in that kind of way.” Myungsoo declared as he sat on the shoreline. He buried his toes deeper into the sand as a cold breeze came by and made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

The sun was beginning to set behind the cherry pink and peachy orange clouds. The scene was so gorgeous that if Myungsoo wasn’t stuck in such a tough and brain-cell killing situation, he would have definitely enjoyed the astonishing view before him. 

He pulled his knees into his chest as he rested his chin on top. “What am I supposed to do?” then he got a phone call. Feeling a little hope that it might be his best friend, he immediately pulled it out and answered without any reluctance. “Xia! Where are yo—”

“Myungsoo-ah, it’s me.” Maerah’s voice greeted.

“Oh,” sulked Myungsoo.

On the other end, Maerah was a bit baffled by the disappointment in his voice, yet she waved it off and carried on with her conversation. “Are you going to pick me up for dinner?” she chirped sweetly.

“U-uh, right now?”

“Geurae,” she replied.

“Noona, can we do it another time? I’m not feeling all that great.” He sighed.

“Jinjja? Did something happen? Is there anything I can do?” Maerah bombarded full of concern.

“It’s a personal matter. I hope you understand I just need to be alone and figure out what’s going on in there.” He explained.

“Going on in where?”

“Nothing. I have to go but eat well noona.” Myungsoo then ended the call and exhaled as he gazed down at his screensaver.

It was a photo of Miyoon he had managed to secretly take while she had been welcoming and greeting the guests to his party. It was a side profile of her smiling brightly and Myungsoo felt his heart leap right out of his chest. He swallowed hard before shaking his head and returning the device back into his pocket.

He attempted to slow down his obviously smitten organ before he would pass out from how fast it was beating. I can’t love her that way, it’s impossible. She’s my best friend. My little sister. That’s all we are. Besides, it wouldn’t even make sense if I did. It would be random and illogical.

As he stared out into the vast ocean dejecting the idea of him and Miyoon possibly being more than best friends, a sudden memory linked to this very beach played in his mind.

◄ Summer of 2007 ►

“Myungsoo, I don’t want to come to the beach. Why did you have to pick this place out of all places?” Miyoon, at the age of thirteen, pouted as his parents parked the van in the parking lot just before the sandy shore.

“Because I’ve never been to the beach before and I thought why not have my first time be with you?” Myungsoo grinned as he unbuckled his seatbelt.

“So why didn’t you invite Taela too?” Miyoon frowned as he leaned over and undid her safety device as well.

“Tae said she didn’t want to come because she didn’t want her skin to become dark.” He explained as they exited the car.

It was a steaming hot summer day in mid July also known as one of the hottest months of the year. But fortunately enough, because this beach was a private one owned by Myungsoo’s uncle, there weren’t much people on it. The only people allowed on it were his uncle’s close friends and family which included Myungsoo and his parents.

“Well, if I knew we’d be by the water, I wouldn’t have come either.” She grumbled.

Mr. and Mrs. Kim were unpacking the cooler, umbrellas, beach-chairs and towels while the two youngsters waited for them at the front of the car. “Aw, come on Xia. Don’t be like that.” Myungsoo huffed.

“How can I not? Oppa, you know how I feel about water.” She retorted, sticking her chin up into the air indignantly.

He bent down to meet her at eye level and pinched one of her cheeks. “That’s exactly why I wanted to bring you here. So I could help you conquer your fear.” Miyoon started nibbling on her bottom lip due to the new close proximity of their faces as she nodded her head. “Now that’s a good girl,” Myungsoo chirped.

“Kids, can you give us a hand please.” Mrs. Kim requested.

“Neh.” The two answered simultaneously.

As they reached the trunk, Miyoon took up the cooler while Myungsoo carried the towels.

The two adults were leading the way, followed by their son and then Miyoon who was having quite a difficult time keeping up with them because of how heavy the cooler was. Mr. Kim had suggested she carry something lighter but thinking she could bring it without any issues, Miyoon told him she would be perfectly fine carrying it.

How hard could holding a cooler be? She thought.

And at the moment, it proved to be harder than she had imagined.

In the beginning, Miyoon was doing alright but because the Kims decided to locate themselves on an area further down the beach, Miyoon became weaker and weaker.  

Her arms were becoming excruciatingly sore and being beat down mercilessly by the stinging and blazing rays of the sun was not helping her case. Also since they were walking on sand, her weight was being absorbed with each step she took, making it not the easiest task for her to mobilize.

“Why is it so hot?” Miyoon complained as she took a break to catch her breath. She slouched over, placed the cooler on the sand and wiped the perspiration off of her forehead. Glancing up, she saw that Mr. and Mrs. Kim were twice as far from her since they started the journey.

“Omo!” she shrieked, not wanting to get left behind. She was about to lug the cooler up when everything went black. In a flash, she yanked whatever it was covering her head off, afraid that someone was trying to kidnap her in broad daylight.

When the bright sunlight welcomed her, Miyoon’s eyes widened when she saw Myungsoo carrying the cooler she was struggling with. He had that in one hand and a few towels in the other. She then looked at what had blanketed her to discover that it was a single towel.

It looked like Myungsoo had switched with her.

At his kind act, Miyoon felt a smile infringing her face as she dazed out at his back. “Yah, Xia! Aren’t you coming? Or is that towel too heavy, too?” Myungsoo teased without turning his face to meet hers.

Miyoon, inwardly, giggled as she jogged to his side. “Komawo, Myungsoo.” She beamed.

“Tch, if you were having a hard time you could have told me.” He scoffed, looking forward.

Miyoon pursed her lips out and allowed the towel to dangle around her neck. “I didn’t want to bother you.” She mumbled.

Suddenly, Myungsoo came to an abrupt stop and looked at her with a poker-face. “You will never ever in a million years be a bother to me, Wu Xiazi. Don’t you ever say that again.” He warned.

“I w-won’t.” she stammered as he locked eyes with her.

Miyoon wanted to look away, feeling the blush creep up on her face but she couldn’t bring herself to do so. Her heart was telling her to indulge this precious moment and that’s exactly what she had done. Next, Myungsoo broke out into a wide smile as he nudged her side. “Good. Now come on before we both get left behind.”

Once they arrived at the spot his parents had finally selected, they started setting up. Mr. Kim unfolded the chairs while Mrs. Kim stuck the umbrellas into the sand to provide some shade; and Miyoon was currently laying out two towels. One for herself and the other for Myungsoo.

She had positioned them roughly three or four feet away from one another when Myungsoo came over and frowned at her. “What’s wrong?” she questioned.

“Why are we so far apart?” he answered back with his own inquiries.

“Huh?” Miyoon scratched her head as she looked at the layout. “We’re not far apart.” She protested.

“Yes, yes we are.” He argued and then he went over, picked up his towel and laid it right next to Miyoon’s. It was so close that his towel had overlapped hers by an inch.

“What are you doing?” she blinked.

“That’s better.” Myungsoo cheered. He plopped down and then pulled Miyoon by the wrist so that she could sit right next to him. “I don’t like being separated from you, Xia. So next time when you set up for us, this is the way to do it.” After he made his statement clear, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and dragged her closer so that there wasn’t any space between them left to spare.

Her body froze as her head hit his chest. His scent crawled up into her nose and her heart was going berserk. I don’t like being separated from you either.

“Now, time to go swimming!” Myungsoo declared as he stood up and pulled Miyoon to her feet.

“Aniya!” she cried, feverously shaking her head in disapproval.

“Xia, I’ll be with you the whole time. You have nothing to worry about.” He assured.

“B-but I can’t swim.” She reminded him.

He smiled, “I’ll teach you. You can’t always be afraid of water that’s why you should get over it at a young age.”

“I know but still,”

“Do you trust me?” he asked as he held her small hands in his own.

Miyoon automatically nodded without delay, causing Myungsoo to exhale. “Then trust me on this one. I won’t let anything happen to you. I’ll be there to save you if anything happens. I will always be there.”

And after he had concluded his speech, without any protest, Miyoon allowed herself to be whisked away by him. As always, Miyoon became lost in the moment as she stared at their hands until her feet was submerged into water that is.

“Eek!” she shrieked as she jumped back, breaking away from his grasp. Miyoon quickly bolted back to the dry sand which stuck onto her dampened feet.

“Xia!” Myungsoo shouted as he ran and stopped her from running away any further.

“Ani, oppa! I don’t want to go in there!” she wailed as she shook her head aggressively. “Please don’t make me go.” She pleaded.

 “Xia,” he sighed as he pulled her into his arms, hushing her. “Don’t be scared. Nothing bad happened right?”

Miyoon broke their hug and sniffled. Her fear of water was just that serious. Now, don’t get confused. She isn’t scared of taking a shower or drinking a cup of aqua; it’s only the large bodies of waters that frighten her. Like pools, lakes, oceans and such.

“It’s okay,” he soothed as he placed her head back onto his head. “I’ll be with you. How about we just go in knee high?”

“B-but,”

“I’ll hold onto your hand and never let go.” Myungsoo promised and upon hearing his sincerity and genuine tone, Miyoon found h