This is My Confessions

The Heartbreaker's Game 2: What is Love?

Lu Han’s POV

“Do you like it?” Tao wanted to know as I put the paper down. “We made another one.” He handed me another piece of paper.

I read the title. Angel (Into Your World).

Again, my thoughts went to Eun Hae as I read the lyrics.

 

This moment feels like I was born as a child who knew nothing

I closed my eyes again in case it would be a dream

You were standing in front of my desperate self and praying

Just once, I want to walk side by side with you

 

Taken by the soft wind to your world

You asked me brightly where I came from to your side

And I told you that it was a secret

Wherever we walk together

Will be paradise

 

You are an eye-blinding entity compared to Michael

Who would remember you, I will not forgive it

Like the beginning when stepping into Eden

Believing you every day from the bottom of my heart

 

I always want to protect you

So that even the small things won’t tire you out, I’m eternally in love

 

As your guardian, I will block the stiff wind

Even though people turn their backs to you

If I could become the person

Who can wipe your tears on a tiring day

It will be paradise

 

I, who has fallen in love with no other place to

Go back, my wings have been taken away (oh no)

Even though I lost my everlasting life, the reason to my happiness

You are my eternity Eternally Love

 

I handed it back to Chen but my mind was still on Eun Hae — something that I did not really get. “The two songs are nice . . .” I said slowly. I honestly did like it. They . . . made a lot of sense. I grinned at Exo-M and Exo-K. “Who knows, you guys might even start your own band here or something. The new band in town!”

That got all of them buzzing.

“Not a bad idea,” Baekhyun mused, looking at Chanyeol, D.O, Sehun, XiuMin, Lay, Chen and Tao. “We could sing the same songs but in different languages.” He smiled, liking that idea.

“What should we call ourselves?” Lay wondered, scratching his nose. “We need to think of a very unique name that people will remember us by.”

“How about Exo?” Chanyeol suggested, clasping his hands together, smiling brightly at all of us, his curly hair flying as he moved his head. “I mean, no one knows about Exo except for Eun Hae and Daeseul.”

“Since we’re going to be in two different groups, it’s only fair if we split ourselves in Exo-K and Exo-M,” D.O went on, nodding his head.

“Whoa, aren’t you getting a bit too ahead of yourselves?” I spoke up and they all looked at me. “I mean, before you guys start thinking about being famous and all, you guys really need to find an entertainment building and such.”

“SM Building!” Sehun piped up. “Apparently, there’s actually a building called SM Building, just like how the building where we live in back home in Exo is also called SM. I think that this must be fate.”

I just shrugged even though I was somewhat amazed that there was even a building called SM Entertainment, except ours was called SM Building. It does sound weirdly fated in a twisted, alien away.

I checked the time. It was almost noon. Eun Hae wasn’t expecting me to be back by noon so that was okay. But I still needed to do whatever I needed to do it quickly and I needed to do it now. I cannot afford to waste time, especially since my deadline is coming up.

I can’t believe I was so last-minute, that I was careless enough to not bother to check the time. How could I have been so forgetful? What made me be so forgetful? All I remembered was that all this while I’ve been hanging around with Eun Hae and that I was . . . happy . . . to be near to her.

Aish, why does my heart perform a little skip-a-beat tap dance every time I either think, see, kiss, hold, or talk to Eun Hae?

“Heyyy . . . can I ask you something, Lu Han gege?” Lay asked me, breaking me away from my train of thoughts and I snapped out of it.

“Huh?” I asked blankly.

XiuMin and Tao giggled childishly while Baekhyun and Chen just gave them a stern look each and they just shrugged. Chanyeol just smirked, sitting on the sofa while Sehun turned back to the television. D.O just closed his eyes as if he wanted to sleep.

“Are you in love with Eun Hae?” he asked.

Everyone stopped what they were doing and all eyes turned to me, waiting for me to answer that question.

I frowned, shifting in my position, feeling really awkward and uncomfortable. “Why do you ask such question?” I asked him back.

Why does everyone always ask me that question?

He shrugged. “No reasons.”

The others all listened attentively, waiting eagerly for my answer. “Do you love her?” they asked me as well. “It’s actually kind of obvious that you do,” they said before I even had a chance to say anything.

“Just admit that you do,” XiuMin urged.

Tao nodded earnestly. “Yeah, Lu Han gege, so that you can be happy and we’ll leave you alone,” he chimed in and I glowered at him.

“Are you sure about that, Tao? Will you really leave him alone?” Chen laughed. “I think I’ll continue making fun of Lu Han gege about it.”

Chanyeol laughed as well. “Yeah, just like how we sometimes make fun of Kai about Daeseul because it’s fun to make him blush,” he said.

Sehun cracked up. “Ah, fun times.”

“You’re blushing,” D.O murmured softly in the midst of their laughter so only Baekhyun and I heard it.

I realized I was blushing and quickly stopped before anyone saw that. I just shrugged. I looked at Baekhyun who had a smile on his face. “I don’t have to tell you anything,” I mumbled, feeling my face grow hot again. Seriously, this is so awkward. I’m not even close to Exo-K and they’re making fun of me as well.

“You’re not denying anything!” Sehun exclaimed gleefully, pointing excitedly at me, and the others cracked up even more. “Does this mean that you’ve finally realized and admit the fact that you are, indeed, in love with Eun Hae?” he wanted to know.

I shrugged again, trying to desperately think of something to distract them. I looked down and gasped. “Cockroach!” I cried out.

“Aaahhh!!! Cockroach? Where? Where? I hate cockroaches!!” XiuMin and Sehun cried, jumping onto Tao, who collapsed on the floor due to their weight. They quickly scrambled up to their feet and jumped on the kitchen table, with Tao following suit.

Chanyeol and D.O began stomping on the floor like mad and Chen was zapping lightning at all random places.

“Don’t hurt it!” Lay exclaimed, the big animal lover. He wanted to save it. He looked at me. “Where did it go?” he wanted to know.

I pointed to under the sofa. “Under there, I think.”

Chanyeol and D.O immediately joined XiuMin, Tao and Sehun on the kitchen table while Baekhyun bent over to check for the non-existence cockroach. While they were all distracted, I made a way out of the door.

I quickly walked out of that place before they realized I’d just pranked them before I began walking back to Eun Hae’s apartment. I needed to see Kai. I needed to talk to someone who probably had more experience than me and I didn’t know anyone else.

I was pretty sure Eun Hae wouldn’t go up there any time soon. She hasn’t been up there for ages, ever since she found out that Kai was an alien from Exo too, which was almost three months ago.

I walked out and went up to the rooftop. While waiting for Kai, I was nervously pacing back and forth. Why do I feel this way? Why can’t I stop smiling every time I think about Eun Hae? Darn, I have that goofy smile on my face again like I always do with Eun Hae.

Aaarrgggh, wipe it off! Wipe it off!

Kai appeared in front of me, looking sleepy. It looked like I’d disturbed his sleep. “What do you want that made me get out of my precious bed when I could be sleeping and having the time of my life dreaming about chocolate?” he grumbled darkly.

“It’s about Eun Hae and The Heartbreaker’s Game,” I blurted out.

He raised an eyebrow. “And exactly what is that?” he asked, rubbing his eyes. He frowned, thinking thoughtfully. “Isn’t her birthday, the deadline, next week?”

I nodded. “I slept with her already.”

His eyebrows shot up, fully awake. “Oh really? You did? Last night? And how was that?” he smirked, folding his arms across his chest.

“Unbelievably good,” I admitted. “Better than any others I’ve ever had in my life and you know I had a lot.”

He does. “So, what about it?”

I sighed heavily, wondering what to begin. So I began telling him my feelings. I told him about how strange I was feeling when I was with Eun Hae earlier just now. I told him about how she looked so different and that everything about her was so new and strange in a good way now these days.

I shook my head and sighed. “I am sometimes a disappointment to myself. I mean, I set goals for my benefit and this time instead of following through each rule through and through, I seemed to have broken the most important one.”

“What do you mean?”

“This was just a Game, after all, remember? The Heartbreaker’s Game. I was supposed to come down to Earth from Exo, meet Eun Hae, and then get her to fall in love with me. It was an easy challenge, and I managed to do it. Even when I had to fight for her heart with you, it was still easy because she was already falling hard for me. Then we got together and I made her think that I loved her, that I was seriously in love with her.” He gave a dry laugh. “She was so gullible that she fell for it. And now I’ve slept with her. The only thing for me to do to win the Game is to break her heart.”

He nodded.

“That was my Game plan,” I explained to him. “I planned it out, step-by-step, of what to do to get her to sleep with me and then break her heart.” I looked down. “I planned it all, and almost everything went according to plan.”

Almost?” He caught the key word.

I looked up, realizing why I felt that way about Eun Hae this morning. It hit me hard and I can’t believe that was the reason why. “Yeah, almost.”

He folded his arms across his chest. “What do you mean by that?” he wanted to know.

“I  . . . didn’t plan on falling in love with Eun Hae.”

 

No One’s POV

Those words rang in Kai’s head until he was sure that that was exactly what Lu Han had said to him just now. He stared at Lu Han. “You – You fell in love with Eun Hae?” he asked him. He really admitted it now?

Lu Han nodded and looked up to the sky. “I’ve always had . . .” he replied softly. “I’ve been in love with her for a very long time.”

“Since when . . .?”

He chuckled softly. “A few days after I met her, when I annoyed her too much until she told me to get lost. I pretended that I really left. But then, because Yongguk and Himchan were still bullying her, somehow I had to make sure she was okay so I turned invisible and followed her around. It was then I realized I was falling for her.” [The Heartbreaker’s Game, chapter 20]

Kai gasped. “That long?”

Lu Han nodded and sighed.

“But when I asked you, you said you didn’t love her!”

“Aren’t you forgetting that one rule of The Heartbreaker’s is that you’re not allowed to fall in love?” Lu Han shot back.

Kai winced. Obviously he would know.

“I tried to tell myself that if I keep denying it, eventually the feelings would die off, but it never did,” he went on. “I thought if I denied it, I would realize it was just some stupid infatuation or whatever. It only grew stronger every time I see her face the first thing in the morning. It grew stronger when she opened up her heart to me to tell me about B.A.P and about her parents. And it grew even stronger when she became mine. I just couldn’t stand denying it after last night. It was so annoying when everyone kept asking me.”

“Yeah, everyone but Kris suspected it.”

“No, I think dui zhang suspected that I was in love with her too,” Lu Han replied, frowning. “But it’s just that he’s in love with her, too, so that’s why he didn’t say anything.”

Kai’s eyes grew large with stunned astonishment. “Your leader? Kris, the dragon? He fell in love? With Eun Hae, of all people?!”

He nodded.

“I don’t believe this. That’s . . . unusual.”

“I know right. . . .” Lu Han heaved a sigh and looked at Kai. He was troubled. “Is it wrong for me to not want to break her heart?” he asked. “I don’t want to break her heart. Even though I had planned to just tell her that I needed to go back to Exo and leave her for about two hours before going back to her, the idea that I have to break her heart — the idea that I have to bring pain into her heart — just kills me.” He ran a hand over his hair in frustration, his eyebrows pulled together with worry and annoyance. “I don’t ever want to bring pain to her heart after all that she’s been through. In fact, I want to make her smile.”

“But you’ve no choice.”

“Exactly!” Lu Han burst out and felt like he wanted to punch himself for being so weak, for not knowing what to do to make it simpler and to not hurt Eun Hae. He sighed. “I don’t know. I just . . . I really love her. If I leave her, Kris will come and take her. I don’t want him to take her away.”

“But you’re not going to be harsh or be a with her; you’re just leaving. Surely she’ll take you back since it’s not like she hates you, right?” Kai argued and he has to admit, that actually made sense.

Lu Han nodded, feeling a lot better. “You’re right,” I said. “I have no choice but to break her heart but as long as I know she’ll take me back, that’s all the matters.”

Kris and Suho suddenly appeared next to the both of them and they jumped in surprise. Suho looked grim and Kris looked even worse than him.

“Congratulations,” Suho said flatly and reluctantly extended a hand toward Lu Han.

“Her heart is broken. You’ve won the Game,” Kris said softly.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Her heart is broken.

The Game is Over.

Just when Lu Han finally admits he's in love with her too D:<

Gosh, I am evil ._. Will explain more in the next chapter.

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Comments

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bollocksblake
#1
Chapter 32: OMG. This chapter made me said "what" a million times. Who could've guessed that Daehyun was her brother? And Kris! Gosh this too much hahahahaha xD
Mybeau #2
Chapter 20: i love the part when Eun Hae got Kris out of his dragon mode!!!
Exotic788
#3
Chapter 33: Oh my gosh I ship Kris and Eun Hae so much!
elfexoticbabyshawol #4
Chapter 53: Totally.... flippin..... mind blown. I have no words, other than to say keep making fanfics!! Author-nim hwaiting!!
jonginsworld
#5
Chapter 53: FINISHED THE WHOLE THING!!! I like how this was somehow similar to the hunger games but with a different concept. thank you for writing up such an awesome fic, I enjoyed it heaps haha.
JungJeWon #6
Chapter 29: krisssss...when zico said he scary i can imagine that it is kris...so now its more complicated...why he take revenge for her???
JungJeWon #7
Chapter 27: ahhhh...ive thought sooo...hate it...although i love zico...so what is kris related to eunhae if the brother is youngjae???why eunhae can make him calm???
JungJeWon #8
Chapter 18: yayyyyyy...exom to the adventure...
CallMeN
#9
Chapter 53: Finally I finished n I am amazed!
JungJeWon #10
Chapter 9: omo kris...dont be mad...cant you fight against suho only???