chapter o12

THIRD PERSON'S POV

"Making a new song again, eh?" Siwon spoke as soon as he barged in to Donghae's room.

Donghae has been spending his time writing a new song lately. Composing songs has been his passion and hobby when he doesn't have anything to do. He keeps himself busy with writing new songs that mostly are about love. Jessica has been his inspiration ever since he started liking her and now, the fact that he loves her to death just gives him another reason to be motivated in writing new songs that are actually for her.

"Like this is something new for you?" Donghae replied sarcastically as he continued strumming his guitar.

"I've never seen you play the guitar." Siwon mention as he sat on the beanbag in the corner of Donghae's room.

Donghae stopped and turned to look at his buddy. "Seriously?"

"Yes. I've already seen you playing the piano but guitar? Na-ah." Siwon replied with a nod.

Donghae shrugged and continued to strum his guitar, sometimes tuning it because it seemed like it's out of tune. Siwon, on the other hand, stood up from where he's sitting and went towards Donghae to see the lyrics that is written on a paper.

"Expressing your feelings through a song is a good idea but you know what's better?" Siwon questioned him.

"What?" Donghae asked back without looking up to him, still busy with his guitar.

"Admitting it. Saying these words you're writing right in front of her." Siwon's words hit him so hard. He knew that Siwon's right and has a point but maybe he doesn't know that there's something to lose if ever he does that and it means risking everything he and Jessica have shared all throughout the years.

"I don't see you as a coward, Donghae. So please don't see yourself as one. You're the only one who's discouraging yourself because you kept on thinking about the negative things that might happen but hey, here's one thing, if there's a negative, there's a positive one. Try to be optimistic sometimes." Siwon advised as he patted Donghae's back.

"You don't have to be nervous, you know? Just let your heart speak. Let your heart to speak to her. Don't be afraid. There's nothing wrong with trying. Confessing your feelings doesn't mean asking her to turn your friendship into a relationship. It's just a way of letting her know what you truly feel towards her. You see, once it's done, your mind would be cleared already, the questions in your head will be answered. Don't you want that?" he asked.

"Of course, I want to." Donghae replied right away. "But I-I'm afraid she'll reject me."

"Stupid, you're not asking her to be your girlfriend!" Siwon hit his head.

"Yah, what was that for?!"

Siwon rolled his eyes and sighed. "You see, you're confessing, alright? You're not asking her to be your girlfriend so why will she reject you? You'll be just telling her your true feelings and that's that! Unless she feels the same way as you so maybe you could go directly to the point wherein you'll ask her to be your girlfriend."

Then he finally realized how stupid he was for misunderstanding everything. How could he misunderstood all of it? Now he knew how stupid he really was for misunderstanding it. Thank goodness, Siwon dropped by his apartment to, wait, what was he doing there, by the way?

"Yah, what are you doing here, before I forget?" Donghae asked him.

Siwon grinned. "Nothing, just wanna bug and bother the hell out of you."

Donghae frowned at him. He knows that Siwon doesn't drop by without any reason. And his reason is way too impossible and unbelievable.

"You don't look like you're bugging me? You see, you're not good at bothering people. It's usually me who is good at it." Donghae said in a boasting tone, sounding so proud of himself in bothering people.

"Because you feel so lonely all the time that's why you like bothering people." Siwon pointed out.

Donghae just let out a chuckle and continued what is he doing.

A few minutes later, Siwon began to spoke again. "But there's this one person you don't really bother. Maybe you always bully her but when she's busy, you don't really bother her even if you're already bored to death and feeling lonely just because that person does not talks to you,"

Donghae began to be curious and put down his guitar pick. He swiveled the chair to face where Siwon was and asked him who is the person he's talking about.

"It's pretty obvious, Hae. It's Jessica." Siwon answered with a chuckle.

"How did you know?"

Siwon laughed out of a sudden while Donghae stared weirdly at him.

"We always study with her and Tiffany, right? During our free time? Have you already lost your mind? You seem... lost." Siwon commented.

"Oh? Am I?"

Siwon nodded. "What's going on with you?"

"Nothing."

"Come on, you know you can always tell me! Maybe I can help. Is there a problem?" Siwon told, urging Donghae. Siwon knows to himself that Donghae has something in his mind that bothers him. And the only thing that bothers him are his problems.

Donghae sighed.

"I talked to my brother earlier about you know, about the feelings I'm feeling towards J and asked him what should I do because even though I swore to myself already that I won't admit it to her, it keeps on hunting the hell out of me like sometimes there are thoughts about what if she dates another guy, what if there may not be another one like this and what if I should just confess so these things would come to an end already?"

"Confess, then." Siwon simply stated while listening to him, crossed arms and eyebrows raised.

"Of course, you'll say that." Donghae heaved a deep sigh and shrugged.

"I've been there before and now look, I and Tiffany are already together. You know why? Because I didn't choose to be a coward. Gain all your courage inside of you and have the guts to tell her about how you feel towards her. Unsaid feelings shouldn't be left unsaid. It's not meant to be hidden. It is meant to be said. So why hide from her? She has the right to know and if you'll just keep that to yourself then... your loss." Siwon's words are on the spot. Everything that he had said were sensible and full of meaning. Sure, he's good at this. Like he had said, he's been there before and he experienced it already. It was a good thing that Donghae has a buddy like Siwon who can help him with these stuffs aside from his older brother.

"I didn't know a girl can make you this weak, Donghae. Be brave and have the guts to tell her everything you have for her." Donghae suddenly remembered what his older brother had told him earlier before he went out with his pets.

Have the guts.

Sure, he knows he lacks courage to tell Jessica that he actually loves her more than anything. He's too shy when it comes to this stuff. Confessing isn't really his thing but since he's a guy, he's the one who should do it. It's a thing that guys should do, after all.

All he had to do is to gather all his courage and have the guts to tell Jessica that he loves her, that she is his everything, that he can't live without her, that she's the reason behind his bright and sweet smiles, that she's the reason why he cheers up everyday.

"I hope I enlightened your mind somehow, Donghae." Siwon said and patted Donghae's shoulder once again.

"But if I'm going to do it, what if she doesn't feel the same way as me?" this question really bothered Donghae the most. He keeps on asking this question to himself and it's a horror to him. He doesn't feel like knowing that answer but it really bothers him.

Siwon shrugged. "Accept the fact? After all, that's what you can only do if ever. IF EVER." he emphasized the phrase 'if ever'.

"Don't be too pessimistic, okay? Try to look at the bright side. You keep on letting yourself down. Cheer up like you always do!" Siwon tried to cheer him up but he really seemed down with the problems he's having right now to himself.

"Well you know, it's not that I'm forcing or pressuring you to confess to her but my motive is to give you some ideas and words so that you will be enlightened eventually and to make you realize and think about things. But don't overthink too much." he kept on talking and talking to Donghae but the other one seemed to be a little drowned with his thoughts.

"Oh my, seemed like Jessica really influenced this kid a lot, huh?" Siwon muttered to himself as he observed the zoning out Donghae in front of him.

"No wonder they're meant to be." he thought.

Siwon was in the midst of playing a game on his phone when Donghae spoke all of a sudden. He was zoning out for quite a while now and Siwon just let him drown himself with his own thoughts. Siwon thinks that Donghae really needs to think over things since he's quite confused as of the moment.

"I made up my mind." Donghae began to spoke.

Siwon was kinda startled but then everything registered to his mind and widened his eyes. Siwon's eyes were telling Donghae to tell him what is his decision after who knows how many minutes he took.

"I'll confess to her."

Siwon cheered, stood up from where he's sitting and shouted. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!"

He looked like he just won in the lottery.

"There's no way you can back out, dude. You gave your word already, no backing out!" Siwon told him.

Donghae only nodded his head.

"I'm going to do this." Donghae told himself

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: Finally came up with something to update! Hahaha. It took me two days just to think of something to add in the story. Well, I hope you guys like it! Seriously, I finished making this update at almost 4:30am hahaha! Is the update short? I feel like it is but, thanks for reading anyway! :) Keep on sending your comments below! Lots of love and Happy Halloween~!

Don't know why, tell me why I can't get over with This Is Love MV and Evanesce MV!!!!!

(sembreak's gonna end soon ㅠㅠ)

IF THERE ARE ANY MISSPELLED WORDS OR ANY TYPOGRAPHICAL ERRORS OR EVEN A WRONG GRAMMAR, I COMPLETELY APOLOGIZE. ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE SO PLEASE BEAR WITH ME.