“Oh, Baekhyun hyung.” Kai hands his phone to Baekhyun after reading the first line of the text message. Baekhyun shot his dongsaeng a confused look before getting the phone and reading the message.

From: unknown

Kim Jongin give this is Baekhyun or die.

Oii Baekhyun, get your here. I’m awake now.

S O O J I

“Sooji?” Baekhyun knits his eyebrows together. He suddenly gets giddy and the stylist spanks his shoulder. “Yah! Noona!”

“Stay still.” She hisses and continues dying his hair. “Are you sure that’s her?”

“Why would she even text you?” Sehun guffaws and peeks at Kai’s phone. “Unknown number? Tss…”

“Let’s ask the others to check and see.” Suho suggests. “Since we have an event tonight.”

“But I want to be the first perso—” Baekhyun whines, receiving another spank from the stylist. “Oww.”

“Alright, I’ll call Luhan ge.”Sehun fishes his phone out and calls Luhan, ”Ge, can you come and visit Sooji at the hospital… yes… uhuh… good… bye. ”

“Wooo… oh yeah… rarara… wooo…” You bob your head to the loud music coming from the television. MCountdown was being aired on television and you were enjoying some group-you-didn’t-know’s performance. “OH YEAAAAH..”

“Oh, it’s done?” You scratch your head and waited for the next performer. “Oh… Infinite!”

When you were in Japan, you always saw them on television. You also saw SHINee, KARA and Girls’ Generation. Those were the only Korean groups you recognized.

“Tun… tun tun utntun…” You pretend hitting a drum and swinging your head here and there. “Namjaga saranghalttaen.. woosoo ramen.. saranghae… oh yeah toilet! Poop poop oh yeah yeah rock on yeah! Awo awo awooo~”

Chen and Luhan enter the room, shock written all over their faces. They watched you singing and dancing along Infinite’s performance like an idiot. Imagine a mummy looking creature dancing and singing and pretending to be a drummer of a rock band.

You were biting on your lips for realistic effect and bobbing your bandaged wrapped head with eyes closed. “Oh yeah.. wooo aha aha aha!”

“YAH LEE SOOJI!” Chen calls your attention. You stopped what you were doing and shot him a glare. You were expecting him to be Baekhyun but he wasn’t. A deep heavy sigh escaped from your lips. “So, you’re awake.”

“Yep. Since eight hours ago.” You retort, lowering the television’s volume. “Where’s Baekhyun?”

“Exo-K’s going to perform right now.” Luhan says, “Are you okay?”

“Of course.” You smirk and sigh, “I look really ugly, don’t I? These bandages make me look like a mummy.”

“A pretty mummy.” He gives you a pat on the head. “Don’t do that again next time.”

“It was fun, though.” You pout, “I thought I was dead and I thought I met the ghost council. Pshh… I almost thought it didn’t to be dead. But, who knows?”

“Eeeeeesh!” Chen grits his teeth. “We’re going back, since you’re okay here.”

“Wait!!! Can you get the nurse? And tell her if I can borrow her makeup and phone?” You order them. An idea just popped inside your head. “And don’t tell Baekhyun! Tell him… I died! Tell him, you didn’t see me. Uh… tell him I’m at the morgue!”

“Hm…?” Chen’s lips form a small smirk, “Why would I do that?”

“Please!!!” You plead, clasping your hands together.

“What are you planning to do?” Luhan raises an eyebrow.

“Secret.” You stick your tongue out. “Just do it, tell Baekhyun I died and tell the nurse to come here with her phone and make up.”

“Do we get anything from this?”

“Yah, Che—”

“I’ll treat you bubble tea for a month. Or whatever food you like.” You bargain, “A whole month.”

“Deal.” Chen closes the deal and drags Luhan out. A few minutes after they left, the nurse came in with her makeup kit and phone.

 “Why do you need this?” The nurse asks, giving you her makeup kit.

“You’ll see.” You chuckle and apply dark makeup under your eyes and cheek bones. You smudge blood red lipstick on the side of your lips and pat face powder on your lips to make it look white. “Do I look scary now?”

The nurse nods and gives you her phone. You position the phone and took a selca with a smiling face.

“Send that to 96743870643, okay?” You order her and give her back her phone, “Now take a picture of me.”

“Ok..ayy..” the nurse agrees and shakily take a picture of you after you pretended to be dead. “To whom will I send this?”

“The one we sent the message earlier. Hurry!!!” You excitedly squeal, returning your attention to the television.

“Another message from that number?” Kai scratches his nape, giving Baekhyun his phone. “This has to be for you.”

“Hmm…” Baekhyun opens the message and screams, “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!” He kicks his legs and almost throws Jongin’s phone towards the mirror.

“Yah, Byun Baekhyun! Stay still.” The stylist facepalms herself.

“What is this??!?!” Baekhyun growls and cringes at the picture of a dead person. It looks awfully familiar because of the facial features and the bandage wrapped around the head but the heavy makeup disguised the face well. “Ugh… scary!”

“Hyungs…” Sehun’s lips shakes after receiving a phone call from Chen, “So..ooji… she’s dead.”

“What?” They all stand up in surprise.

Baekhyun badly wanted to go to the hospital. But they couldn’t right now. They have to perform for Seoul Girls Collection. If he had a choice, he’d rather run to the hospital to see you before they put you to the morgue.

He couldn’t hide the sadness and pain that it affected his performance. His facial expressions weren’t as lively as before. While singing to What Is Love with D. O., he can’t help but frown. He wanted to cry.

D. O. can’t help but be worried about their performance. Baekhyun’s voice faltered. He couldn’t reach the high note. He knows what Baekhyun is going through right now, so he kept the smile on his face. He made funny adlibs to divert the audience’s attention to him.

And what’s even funnier is because Sehun told them, sans Baekhyun, that Sooji isn’t dead.

‘Poor Baekkie.’ D. O. thinks and sings the last line.

“Thank you.” They say in unison and bow. As they walk to the backstage, D. O. patted Baekhyun’s back in sympathy. Baekhyun frowned at him and locked himself in the dressing room.

“I hate you.” He sobs, burying his face in his hands. “How could you! You left me.”

“ARGHHHHHHHH… how am I supposed to live now?” He cries. “She can’t be dead, right? The doctor didn’t say anything about that. She even sent me a text messa—”

And then it hit him. The next text message was a picture of a dead girl. Could it be Sooji?

Is Sooji a paranormal being now?

“Is she at the morgue?” Baekhyun worriedly asks, running along the hallways, looking for the morgue. He was crying hard. Tears were overflowing his eyes. He can’t believe she died. “Argh... why did she.. HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME!!!”

“Poor Baekhyun.” Chanyeol chuckles, watching his hyung run to the morgue. “This is interesting.”

“Right.” Kai shakes his head. “Sooji’s bound to be dead meat later.”

“Even though I’m against this whole prank thing, Baekhyun really amuses me.” Suho admits, inserting his hands in his pockets. “Oh look he’s coming.

“Get ready.” Sehun says and gets his pokerface on.

“WHY ARE YOU NOT WORRIED?!?? SHE’S NOT IN THE MORGUE!” Baekhyun screams, wiping the tears that covered his whole face, “Someone took her body. She got kidnapped. She isn’t dead!”

“Hyung…” D. O. places a hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder. Baekhyun shoves it away and grumbles.

“NO! You’re not even worried about her. She’s dead she’s missing! Wha—”

“Calm down.” Kai holds Baekhyun, “We’ll show you.”

“Hello hello moshi moshi ciao ciao busy busy, every time I need a beep beep beep beep.” You sing, “Beep beep beep beep like a jeep on a trip to the cliff with a clip. Join the hip, win a tip, kiss her lip, cut the nip and you’ll keep. Oh yeah beep beep beep beep. I‘m a rapper!”

“Miss, don’t you want to remove the makeup?” The nurse frowns at your face, “You might get pimples. That’s too heavy.”

“I’m still enjoying my zombie look, okay!!” You stick your tongue out, “Hello hello moshi moshi ciao ciao annyeong annyeong bonjour bonjour nihao nihao hoy hoy~”

“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” A loud yell emanates from the door, coming from a wild bacon. He charges towards you, holding your arms. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? LOOK AT YOU!”

Unknowingly, you smile brightly at him. “B-baekhyun-ah…” You squeal and wrap your arms around his neck, crying. You were longing to see him and now that you are, you couldn’t help but engulf him in a big hug. “Baekhyun!!!”

“Look at you!” Baekhyun pulls away, feigning annoyance. “What did you do to your face?”

You didn’t answer but smiled at him creepily.

“Aigoo, what if you get pimple, huh?” He snickers and takes the baby wipes from the nurse. He wipes it across your face and cleans your face. “Why did you eve... Sooji, can you be mature for once?”

You were still smiling at him.

“Seems like she missed him a lot.” Kai shakes his head, elbowing D. O. “Look at her creepy smile.”

“This is priceless.” Chanyeol snaps a picture of you and Baekhyun. “They look so cute.”

“Waaah… can I get a wife too?” Sehun dreamily says, “A wife like her would be delightful.”

“Agreed.” Suho stares at the couple.

“She’s troublesome…” D. O. trails off, receiving glares from the four boys. “…but adorable.”

 “She’s my ideal type now.” Chanyeol creepily says, “But she’s rare. Really rare. Ill-mannered but adorable. Ahhh, where would I find that?”

“I should have called dibs on her before.” Kai chuckles, “But I already like someone else.”

“Don’t blame me if you get pimples, okay?” Baekhyun does one last wipe on your face. “There all clean.”

Still smiling.

“Stop smiling!!!” Baekhyun complains, “It’s getting creepy.”

“Awww.” You pout and glare at him, “I’m sorry.”

“Not forgiven. Bye.” Baekhyun walks away but you stop him, wrapping your fingers around his.

“Baekhyun, don’t leave… please.” You beg him. You didn’t want to be separated from him. No matter how annoying you two can get, you feel happy with him. “Please… Baekhyun, I’ll do whatever. Just don’t leave me again.”

“Whatever?” Baekhyun raises his eyebrow, “Hmm…”

“Whatever you want except for letting go of you. I won’t ever do that.” You interlock your fingers with his and plea, “Baekhyun, please, I know I’m a bad person who doesn’t deserve you. But I really like you. You’re the only one I really like. I know I sound cheesy and yucky right now but please Baek.”

“Okay. Sing Oh!” Baekhyun nonchalantly shrugs but deep inside his insides were burning. He felt like he drank muriatic acid and now everything inside him is turning hot.

“Oh!? Why would I do t—urgh fine…” You frown and started singing in monotone voice, “Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oppareul saranghae. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Man manihae. Sujubeun itjebal uljimay—”

“Arghh… sing it like Girls’ Generation!” Baekhyun snorts, “Dance! I want you to dance to it too.”

“WHYYY!!! This is too much.” You complain. Baekhyun grins at you and you sigh, rolling your eyes. You lift you right hand and dance while singing, “Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! BAEKHYUN SARANGHAE! AH AH AH AH BAEKHYUN UGLY!!!”

Baekhyun covered his eyes, “Aish.”

“SUJUBEUN ITJEBAL UTJIMAYO! JINSHIMINEULL BLABLA BLA MARAYO!! BABO BAEKHYUN BABAO SOOJII!! OH OH OH OH BAEKHYUN SARANGHAE! AH AH AH AH! BAEKHYUN POO—”

“Stooooooop!” Baekhyun covers your mouth with his hand. “Fine. Fine, you’re forgiven.”

“We’re not needed here. Let’s go.” Suho grabs s and the nurse outside.

“OH OH OH OH BAEKHYUN SARANGHAE AH AH AH AH BAEKHYUN SARAN—“ You continue singing whle jabbing his forehead.

“Stop it or I’ll kiss you!” Baekhyun threatens.

“EWWWWWW!!!” You cringe, earning a slap from him. You widened your eyes and slap him back. You continued slapping each other’s faces until they turned numb and red. “Awww.”

“Look at you! Tomato!”

“HA! RED BEET!”

“Ugly!”

“Poop!”

“Stupid.”

“PEE PEE POO POO YAKA YAKA!” You holler, rolling your eyes. “You’re not going to tell me anything?”

“Hmm… you’re ugly?”

“But you’re uglier!” You pinch his cheeks. “Baekhyun, even if you’re ugly and your hair is uglier and your soul is burning in hell, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I hate you.”

“You too.” Baekhyun pouts, “I hate that I love you so much.”

“I hate you too because I love myself so much, too!”

The manifestations of love aren’t always romantic. Love isn’t about sweetness and romance. Sometimes it comes with hatred and humor. If all lovers say good things about each other, then they beg to differ. They expressed theirs by insulting each other without being offended. It’s unique in a way but still cliché, because it’s love.

A/N: don't you think this story is getting longer than expected?

@hanlus: see his wife in heavy zombie makeup!

@mary_210: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA omg but the number is the nurse's number they'll need confirmation!

@lostbluebunny: she's crazy lol djfbdaslehfgiehigheqg ghost council

@jetidal: let's go down with our yacht. yes yacht because we aren't peasants!!!! lol

@MsTrollolol: Well now she did!!!

@choihaneul22: HAHAHHA /slaps sooji

@kaerlana: YAY!!! CLSDFODSNGOADSG CRACK FIC

@junhyngloveforever: he's still blonde but it looks better!!!! kngklfdsghklfdlk T__T BAEKKUUUU HAHAHHAHA i replied already bc i love you guys <3

@AkaruiHoshi: sorry about that >< WELL BAEKJI MOMENT!!!

@parkgail: HAHAHAHA ok good boy gusto mo ng alpo? pedigree?

@Fikyungsoo: oh well!!! dbdishglfdhg ok dont hate me agin i made baekji moment <333

@joy_lovekpop: im so sorry T__T sooji is such a retard everthing became crack >< jdbdkjgdkjdhdl i initially planned a fluff fic with a twist but it became a crack fic sorry

@soohans20: THEY MET AGAIN TODAY YAY! :DDDD 

@Chuchudie: i dont really know why you ppl find it funny i am going to cry :((( jbvfjsgadkfdsafg lol

@an0nymous: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!!! dknfidsahgdsr i cant >< i'm going to cry i tried every genre but it all ended up as crack. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME ABBIE??

@JungSeulRin: HEHEHEHEHEHHEE 

@pandagirl753: say omo ulijimeoragu blablba idk the lyrics

@EXO_luver: dont bow on the floor it's dirty!!! bow down before me loljk ,dvjdksgvfjdsgfds but it's 53 chaps alr ;;