"________-ah." There is an urgent knock on my door. "I need your help."

"Sunbae," I stand up from my desk to greet one of my many seniors. "What is it?"

"Yoojin, she is sick, will probably be for a few days." With a troubled look, he walks closer. "I need you to step in if you have the time."

"But I don't even know what you've been working on, I won't be any good."

"I'll have her send them in since she has the only detailed one. I'm really sorry to ask you in such a rush but the show is next week."

I smile in understanding. "Well, I'm a Hoobae, I'll have to listen to my Sunbae."

Sighting in relief, he relaxes. "Thank you so much, I owe you."

I shake my head no. "When will it start?"

"One hour."

"What?" I look at him like he had lost his mind. "You're telling me now? I don't have any preparation time at all. Ah, Sunbae."

"Don't worry, I know you got this." Somehow he seemed to doubt that suddenly.

That makes me nervous. "Alright, I'll go grab a coffee first, I'll meet you there."

I spend the next half hour preparing my mind having to perform in front of other people, people that I consider much more talented than myself.
Before I can step in the direction of my office after getting out of the lift, my senior calls for me from the opposite side.

He waves me over in a rush. "I've got the music sheets, you can practice before everyone arrives."

Following him, I hear some voices from the classroom. "Didn't you say that is doesn't start until another 20 minutes?"

"You know how idols are, they're early to everything." He's whispering, making me snicker. "Well, it's true."

"Which is a good thing, right? Sets an example."

I see him regarding me from the side. "Are you implying that I'm not?"

He's always late, everyone knows that. "No, I wouldn't dare, Sunbae."

Unamused, he lets me go in first but someone jumps in my way. "Boo!"

I jump but am able to hold back the shriek, my heart racing. When I see the culprit I have no choice but to hit them. "Ya, why?"

"You're still as jumpy, I see." I glare at Seungkwan.

"You're lucky I didn't spill my coffee on you." I think about that for a second. "Actually, can you scare me again?"

Without a response, except his laugh, he pulls me in for a hug. "How have you been, ________?"

I pat his back, glad to see a familiar face. "Great, a little lonely, but great nonetheless." We pull away. "Ya, I heard you won, congratulations."

"Thank you." Somehow these wins still mean a lot to artists, unfortunately not everyone who deserves it wins. "Chanie cried again."

"Cutie." The youngest one had gained a fond place in my heart, all of them. "It's really been a long time."

Squinting at me with an accusing look, he slaps my arm lightly. "Ya, we thought you forgot about us already."

"Ya, I think you forgot about me." I jokingly glare back at him and walk over to the grand piano. "You were the one busy not me. You didn't even tell me that you are in a musical."

Seungkwan watches me set up the piano and only when Sunbae hands me the sheets does he remember that I shouldn't be here. "What are you doing here by the way?"

I glance up at him briefly. ''You don't know? How did you know to scare me then?''

''I heard your voice.''

''Ah,'' He really has got good hearing. "Your pianist will be sick for a few days, I'm stepping in for her."

"Do you even know what musical we are preparing?" I skim through the papers and shake my head. "You're in trouble then."

"Why?" I'm worried now but before he can answer, another set of familiar faces enter the room, I bow. "Hello."

Jungkook, taken a back, stops mid stride as he hears my voice, only to get nudged by someone behind him.

A girl, pretty girl. But aren't all idols pretty? "Oppa, you're spacing out again."

I blink and look away. I focus back on Seungkwan. "Anyway, why am I in trouble?"

Taking the sheets from me, he flips though the parts I hadn't gotten to yet.
"Here, here and here," the papers were scribbled to the point where I think I might have hire a cryptanalyst. "Do you see this? We kept changing it a bit to fit the artists and what not, but look at this... mess"

"Oh," . I don't say. "Maybe I should just leave, I don't think anyone will notice that I'm gone."

Absentmindedly, I sip on my coffee feeling him pat my back reassuringly. "Vocal-coach is already staring you down, I don't think you can leave."

I fight the urge to look. "Maybe you can distract him."

Seungkwan gives me a doubtful look. "I'm good but not that good." He motions towards the stool. "Come, I'll coach you."

My shoulders slump as I realize that I wouldn't be getting out of this at all. So, I take a seat, with much reluctance. "Why did I come to work today?"

A hand pats my head and maybe because Seungkwan usually never does it or because I've been taking a dip into the past, I can't contain the memories of Jungkook doing it. "It's because you're a good girl."

Again, nostalgia. He always called me a good girl. I humph in response. "Go get a chair and help me."

"________-ah, everything alright?"

I look up at my senior with a slight frown. "No, this is a mess."

"Yes, I know." He rubs the back of his neck. "She does work messily but up until now it didn't bother anyone."

Up until now. I sigh. "Don't worry, I'll get it down." When I turn back to the keys, I lay my fingers on them softly and get warmed up and accustomed to the tone of this piano.

"Alright," Seungkwan rubs his hands together. "This is going to be fun."

"You like this, don't you?"

"What?" I give him a look making him chuckle. "It's just funny to see you struggle, you're usually so composed." I fake laugh at the fun he is having.

Sighing, I start playing the intro, timid at first as it's been a long time since I played in front of an audience. Children are different. The artists here are people that have worked harder than I and even though they might not even be paying attention, still the sound of a piano is hard to ignore. Not to mention, he is here, too.

"Seungkwan-ah," I frown at the sheets. "This... am I supposed to play it differently?"

"Huh?" He had pulled his phone out and instead of coaching me, he was busy texting.

"Here..." I point at the scribbles. "I'm not sure what Yoojin— ya, if you can't help me then go find me someone that can."

He ignores me making me scowl at him.

Taking a deep breath, I stretch my back and search for Sunbae who had left the room. My gaze moves across Jungkook though and a few others, the girl never leaving his side. She is a beautiful dancer. Yein. "Girlfriend?"

"If you consider Vernon to be a girl then sure." I'm shocked to realize that I said my thoughts out loud.

I scratch my head. "Idiot."

"I hear you almost hit him last time." Finally, Seungkwan does look up at me. "What did he do?"

"You don't know?" I gather my hair up in a ponytail but remember that I hadn't brought my hair tie. "He tried to kiss me."

"What? Hansol kissed you?" He jumps up from his seat, almost shouting.

"Shhh!" My eyes widen alarmed. "Will you listen properly? Don't start rumors." I pull on his sleeve to get him to sit back down.

"Hansol tried to kiss you?" He's whispering now.

"No, I was joking. We were just playing a game and when it was my turn to hit him, he chased me away with a fake spider, saying it wants to kiss me." I reach for coffee and take gulp.

Next to me, I hear Seungkwan cracking up, his shoulders shaking and then he points at me. ''You ran away from a fake spider. Did anyone film that?''

I glare at him. ''No.''

Still smiling brightly, he pats my back while nodding. ''You need more fun in your life.''

"What I need is your help, Kwanie." I whine towards the sheets. "I'm trying to figure out what that means."

"I'm incapable of reading notes, isn't that what you said, ______-ie?" Now he's using the nickname for me. I glare again. "What? You started it first." I give up. It's too late now, anyways.

A few minutes later, I see Sunbae finally returning. He claps his hands once and I know it's too late to ask him for help now. Rehearsal is starting.

"________, everything set?"

I shake my head honestly and point at Seungkwan. "This one wasn't much help."

"Hey, I never said I could help."

"You said you would 'coach me'." I counter exasperated. "But I guess I should've known better."

"Yes, shame on you, you should have known better."

I'm about to hit him when Sunbae laughs amused. "You should have asked Jungkookie for help." His name makes me stiffen. "He'd be a better coach."

"Ah..." I trail off and flicker my gaze towards said person, finding him looking at me already. "Well, too late for that now."

"It's alright, I listened and it sounds really good for someone who only had 20 minutes to prepare."

Bowing my head sheepishly, I see some of the artist nod their head in agreement. I feel Seungkwan pat my back. "I agree."

"Did you even listen?" I murmur. "I thought you were too busy with your 'girlfriend'."

"Well, I'm not the one Hansol tried to kiss." My eyes widen and if it wasn't for everyone else I really would have hit him, and he knew that, which is why he laughs, patting my head.

"Stop bickering, kids." I don't think I've ever been called 'kid' at work. "Alright, as you all might have noticed, we've got someone new here. Yoojin will be absent for a few days, she hasn't been feeling well, but we've got a wonderful substitute here." I smile at him weirdly at the comment.
"Everyone, let's give ________ a warm welcome."

Everyone starts clapping making me feel warm from all the attention. I bow thankfully and wait till they have stopped to introduce myself.
"Hello, I'm ________, nice to meet you, I'll work hard." Seungkwan next to me gives a cheer. I narrow my eyes at him. Weirdo. ''Please, treat me well.''

"How about you each introduce yourself and maybe tell her what role you play." I felt bad not not knowing about their musical, never mind their roles. I make it a goal to research later.

Most of them, if from idol groups, I knew or have heard of. Even the girl that I keep seeing with Jungkook. I actually really enjoy their music from time to time.
When she says the name of her role, it rings a bell but I'm not a hundred percent sure.

"Hello, I'm Bangtansonyeondan's Jungkook ." Just like with anyone else I smile and clap quietly, bowing when they bow. With Jungkook though, I can't seem to look away. It isn't until his lips quirk up, his gaze coasted downwards, that I know to look away. He caught me.

I'm successful in avoiding any more eye contact with him until they all gather around the grand piano.
I feel Seungkwan lingering around me so I nod for him to join them which he seems reluctant to but I smile in reassurance. I know he was being protective and it's more than appreciated but duty calls.

"Jungkook-ah, let's start with your part." Well, great. Hearing his voice was one thing, but hearing him sing is a total different feeling.

"Which part is that?" I look at the mess that is the music sheets trying to decode anything that might look like Jungkook. "I really need to sort this out for next time."

"Here." Glancing up at his voice, I suddenly feel nervous when he offers me his sheets. "I've written done everyone's part."

"Oh, thank you." I lower my head in thanks and take them from him but then I stop. What about him?

"I'll just share with someone else for today." Jungkook explains as if reading my mind.

"I told you Jungkook is a good student."

I laugh quietly, remembering how he particularly had not been a good student in high school. For a moment silence fills the room and it isn't until I peer up that I realize that everyone was waiting for me to start. "Oh, sorry, do I just start... playing?"

"______-ie, just play Jungkook-Hyung's part and then he'll do his thing." Seungkwan tells me and I do what I'm told.

Having those 20 minutes definitely was not enough, but it was better than nothing at all. Luckily I've been accustomed to piano notes for the last few years, making it easy for me to pick up the melody. 
Dramatic stuff right here, I wonder how Jungkook's voice—

My thoughts are cut off when he starts singing, his voice lower than I remember it to be. There were rarely ever moments when he had to sing in his lower vocal range. He sounds so beautiful, right now.

Goosebumps break out on my arms and luckily the sleeves of my blouse hid them. I concentrate hardly on the sheet not wanting to mess anything up while also trying not to look at him.
I wonder how everyone else was surviving this. Then again, they're probably used to his voice by now.
Weirdly enough, I never got to that point and still don't think I ever will, his voice is too unique for me to ever get used to.

* * * * * *

"Are you getting old or what?" Jungkook watched her stretch her arms and yawn cutely. Seungkwan's never ending teasing making her scowl at him.

"You try sitting for an hour while playing piano." Rotating her wrists, she smiles at him mockingly. "Oh, wait, you can't." But he actually can. So, this must be an inside joke.

He just chuckles at her. "I'm so hungry.''

"Yeah, me too. But I have a course in a bit." She checks her watch and sighs. "I only had that coffee."

Jungkook felt like such a creep for watching her, but he couldn't help it. She looks more stressed and he really didn't like hearing how she doesn't have time for proper meals. Wasn't she the one worrying for him back then?

"Oppa, let's go have lunch." Yein's quiet voice comes from next to him pulling his attention away from her, but not before he sees her looking at them from the corner of her eyes. She'd done that a lot throughout the rehearsal but that's only because it's still awkward for her. Right?
"Hm, let's go." He says, following behind everyone else.

"Hyung," Jungkook turns at Seungkwan's voice. "Your music sheets."

The more he thought about it, the more he noticed how protective Seungkwan is of her. He probably offered her to do the job of returning the paper and seeing how she must have agreed, it only told him how much of a distance she wanted to keep.

"Thank you, see you later." They do one of those brotherly handshakes and before leaving he glances at her one last time, but she wasn't even looking in his direction remotely.

Guess she really doesn't want to have anything to do with him anymore.

~ ~ ~

Jungkook was about to join the rest of their group for a quick drink when he notices the light still being on in the room where he had seen her come out of one day. 
A frown replaces his tired expression. It was late already, why was she still here?

After lunch they had gone on stage to rehearse and as it was a dry rehearsal she wasn't present. At lunch, he hadn't seen her, too. Has she been working all this time? 
He can't help but worry for her, which is why he finds himself taking the few steps over to her office.

When he peers in he finds her head braced on her hand, looking exhausted, her eyes closed, with a bunch of papers on the table in front of her. Knocking against the door frame, gently as not to startle her, he waits until she opens her eyes.

It takes a moment longer. She must have dozed off. "Oh, Jungkook-ssi."

There it is again, the distance put between them. "________." He made it a point not to add any honorifics.

"Yes?" Sleepily, she pushes to her feet and presses her fingers against her lids. Jungkook walks over to her slowly. A smile tugs at his lips when she yawns while apologizing. "Sorry, I'm just really tired."

His eyes land on the papers on her desk. "What have you been doing here this long?"

"Me? Hm..." She runs her fingers though her long hair, looking really exhausted. "It's the musical."

"Ours?" She nods touching the abandoned sheets. "What's so difficult to figure out?"

"Have you seen this?" She says defensively, almost glaring at him. "This, what does that even mean?"

"I'll help you."

"What?" She shakes her head. "No, go home. You've had a long day."

Always caring for others before herself. "How much longer do you plan to stay here, ________?"

"Hm..." She presses her lips together, knowing that he wouldn't like her answer. "Don't you have to go?"

Now, it's his turn to be evaded. She used to be very open with him. "Are you asking me to go?"

"Hm, no..." She starts gathering up her papers. "It's just I heard from Kwanie that you're having a gathering tonight."

"We are." Jungkook confirms and when he realizes that she was getting ready to go, he takes her jacket to help her slip in.

"Thank you." She says quietly, not holding his gaze. "Do you think people would mind if I go, too?"

When she pushes her hair behind her ear, her rings flashes against the light and once again he is reminded of the elephant in the room. What is he doing? She was clearly taken.

"Jungkook-ssi?" His vision clears, her face appearing in front of his in concern. "Do you feel... alright?"

Her hand touches his forehead and he is reminded of that one time he got sick and she took care of him with so much love. 
Reaching up, Jungkook takes her hand from his head. "Aren't you the one sick? Your hand is cold." And then he releases it.

She looks at him, blinking slowly. "My hands are always cold, you know that."

Yeah, he knew and he had liked warming them up for her in the past. Now, someone else would do that. He's in no position to do that. "Let's go."

"Huh?" She too seems to snap out of her own memories and Jungkook wonders if she might have been thinking about the same thing. "I'm actually not sure if I should go.” She laughs nervously. “I don't know anyone.”

“You know me,” Jungkook wishes he could leave it at that but that's not the case anymore. “And everyone else seemed to like you a lot today.”

“That's what you call like?” She wasn't really asking him, he knew that, but he nods anyway. She still doesn't see the effect she has on strangers. “Still, sleep sounds a lot better.”

He wonders why she even brought it up then.

“I know what you are thinking.” He glances her way. “You're thinking why I even asked in the first place, right?”

Her smile is laced with exhaustion, making his wish for her to go vanish in an instant. “Am I that easy to read?”

He starts walking towards the door, waiting for her to exit first. “It's just, that is what I was thinking.”

“And why did you ask then?” Jungkook was curious, she usually never brought up anything that she didn't want to do.

Locking the door, she turns to peer up at him with something in her eyes, something he couldn't read. After a second it's gone.

Then she forces a smile, her adverting gaze saddening him . “I'm not sure myself.”

Not being a good liar hasn't changed it seems, but he doesn't call her out on it. Things are not as they used to be anymore, still it bothered him that she felt the need to lie.

''I need to go to the office before I leave.” Did she really have to or does she just want to avoid him. Somehow, thinking of the possibility alone tightened his chest. “Have a great night... and don't get too drunk this time.''

This time her smile is warm and genuine, brightening up her expression. It makes him feel better at once. “Alright, you rest up well.”

She inclines her head once and waves her hand awkwardly but cutely. “Bye.”

He returns the smile and mimics her movements, making her smile widen. “Bye.”

Her phone rings making her jump. Taking it out, she frowns and purses her lips seeing the screen.
“Oppa?” He sobers up. She sounds worried as well as surprised to get this call. “Is everything alright, you usually don't call this late.”

Her worried expression drops hearing the response from 'Oppa'. “Ya, I'm not 18 anymore you don't need to check up on me all the time.”

Jungkook shoves his hands into his pockets, watching her in amusement. He could hear a familiar voice on the other line. Her brother.
Jungkook feels relieved but he questions himself why he would because that doesn't change the fact that she has someone beside her already.

He feels a light tap on his arm. His gaze connects with hers, she motions that she will leave first and waves. Smiling, Jungkook nods and waves, watching her back as she enters the elevator.

Yeah, he should really ask himself why he is feeling like this.



— — —
this was so hard to edit oh my goooooood, so many characterssss what was I thinkinggggg? ugh, I feel a slight headache forming orz TT I almost thought of not posting today because I didn't have the time to edit until 10pm and it's past mightnight righ now zZzzZ buuuut I can't go to sleep yet, still to up this on tumblr and also maybe find a gif.... I hate how I am a perfectionist... I also don't want to disappoint anyone... I also like to keep a system with the way I do thing... basically digging my own grave....

on another note, I miss bangtan, during promotions its always so stressfull but also so exciting as a fan, like yay finally I can do sth for them.... but then I'm also like wow too much, chill.... now that they are chilling lol I miss them... btw I THOUGHT ISAC GOT CANCELLED???? when will they get rid of this dangerous show???? ugggghhhh, ok I'm clearly very tired I wrote 'reserved' at first hahah :P