"Is it cold, Appa?" My father's hands have been feeling cold all the time but he still insists on taking the morning strolls.

"No, it's all good." Still, wrap him into the blanket a little bit tighter. "It's not that cold because my heart is warm."

I can't help but smile at his cheesiness. "That reminds me of someone."

"Your boyfriend?" I look down. "Is this ok? You're spending all your time with me."

"Of course." Especially now. "Spending time with my father is on the top of my priorities."

"That's a lot of time though." Not a lot of days have past but it feels like it has been weeks already. "Is this ok with work?"

"All is good, Appa." I mimic what he said. We have been walking around the hospital park for the last thirty minutes just enjoying the sun.

Whenever I get the free time I would drive over to be with him. Time might be limited and as I have wasted it already, I felt obligated to be there for him.
Even the work trip was something I wanted to cancel but people depended on me. Everything is just too much lately.

"________-ie." I turn to look at my father. "I hope you won't blame your mother. I never wanted you to know." This is the first time for any of us to speak up about the matter.

"It's hard to blame someone who is already gone." I try for a smile. "Don't worry, all that matters now is you, everything else shall stay in the past."

"I still left and while your mother might have been the reason, I shouldn't have left you behind." I squeeze his arm not really wanting this to affect his condition. "You and your brother."

"We all have our own faults in this, let's not focus on that now." I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket and when I check it, I see it's Hongbin. "Are you tired, Appa? Do you want to go back up?"

"Do you need to go?"

"No," I shake my head. "Later."

I won't admit it to anyone or say it out loud but I was scared of facing the world. Scared of facing myself.
No one else will ever find out about this but as tears suddenly pool in my eyes, I realize that my biggest worry is that I will end up being just like my mother.

There is a reason why people say that an apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

A hand cups mine. "Don't let any of this affect your own relationship, ________. Only because it was like that for us doesn't mean that it will be for you and Jungkook."

"How did you know that I was worrying about this?" I try to smile. "Am I that transparent?"

"You are my daughter, and believe it or not, I'm very good at reading people." He pats my hand again. "And I can see that you love him and I don't think I need to tell you how much he loves you."

"But you too loved Mom and she loved you. Still... things ended like that."

We stop and I realize that he had led us back to the entrance. "People change and that's inevitable. Feelings can change but for me and your mother it was only because we never tried hard enough." My father looks up at the sky, reminiscing. "That's where the faults were."

"Then where is the point?" I know I was pushing it but I really wanted to know. "I don't want to hurt him."

"But you already are." Despite his words, my father was smiling at me. "As long as you love him there is nothing to be scared about. Why are you trying to cross a bridge that isn't even anywhere near your horizon, yet? I held onto my love for your mother for as long as possible and that's all we can do to not have any regrets. Life is too short for that."
Something drips onto my cheek and only then do I realize that I was crying. "Remember to love wholly and beautifully. I'm hoping to witness you walk down the aisle just like now, side by side."

That would be a dream come true but we both knew that there most likely wouldn't be enough time for that to happen.

If only miracles were real...

~ ~ ~

Arriving at work, I quickly walk into the building, seeking shelter from the cold.

"Noona!" Why is there always someone greeting me as soon as I arrive?

"Eoh, Minhyuk-ah." I walk back down the three steps I had taken. "This is early even for you."

"Hurry," he skips to a halt and without prevail pulls me by my elbow. "You have to see this."

"What? Ya, my coffee." But he doesn't stop even when I try to jerk my arm away. What has got him so excited? "Ya, you rascal."
Minhyuk doesn't stop until he has opened the door and pushed me into the auditorium. I hiss and raise my fists at him. "Only because you're taller doesn't mean you can—"

"Noona, look." I ponder if I should scold him for interrupting me but just grabs me by my shoulders and turns me around.

"What... is this?" Instead of the usual stage settings we had for the kids' musical, the background was now filled with more realistic fairy tale inspired props.

"Go, take a look." I don't move because I still couldn't grasp what was happening. Some staff were still setting up a few things and I didn't want to disturb them.

"Do you like it?" The new voice startles me. "I can't read your expression well."

"Hongbin-ssi," my head switches from looking at him to looking at the stage. "Why is it like this?"

"This," he takes my elbow and urges me to walk in further. "Is for your project. Don't you recognize it? It fits your musical."

"But..." I look over my shoulder and wave for Minhyuk to follow. "This is... more."

"That's my doing." I raise an eyebrow at his smug tone. "I decided to put some investment into this project and to help with the stage decoration."

"And you didn't think of asking our team beforehand?"

"You were busy." He gives me a meaningful look and I press my lips together. "It's also an apology for the first time we met. I'm trying to give you a new impression of me."

"There is a reason why it's called a first impression." I begin walking and inspecting the setup with a critical eye. "Minhyuk-ah, I assume you're going to write an article about this?" He joined the editorial team, the reason why he is back.

"You're right," Minhyuk's head pops up in front of me with a smile. "My first assignment since coming back and I get to work with Noona."

"Aigoo, so childish." I press my index finger against his forehead and push. "You know what to do, right? Keep me out of the article."

"Why?" He raises the camera which I hadn't even noticed was around his neck. "I came prepared and your hair fits so well, you look like an fairy yourself. I can already see the spread in front of me."

"Forget it. I'm not doing it. Interview Hongbin-ssi instead."

"What if I don't want to?" Hongbin throws in.

"Then don't do it." Why is he still like that? I peer at him. "You know, I would like you much more if you were more genuine with your actions and motives."

With that I turn and exit the auditorium as the pressure in my side acts up again. For some reason, I have been getting sharp pain randomly and unannounced. It's probably because of the stress.

"Noona!" Will he ever stop screaming? "Have you had breakfast yet?"

"No, but I'm not hungry. You?" I sip from my coffee and try not to show that the stabbing pain was beginning to intensify.

"Not yet, I wanted to wait for you." It doesn't matter how much we've grown, his smile always reminds me of a child's.

"Let's have lunch together." I smile when his excitement shows. "And I'm sorry about earlier, I'm stressed out but I shouldn't have been so harsh."

"It's alright, I'm used to it already."

He was joking and teasing. "Ya, you make me sound terrible."

"No, Noona is awesome."

"Alright, alright, I already said I'm having lunch with you, you can stop now." I pat his shoulder. "See you later."

For some reason seeing him again and being around his cheerful, innocent self made me feel lighter even if it's only for a little bit.

~ ~ ~

"No, let's go together."

"I don't want to. As long as I don't get an invitation I will believe nothing."

"She probably thought that you don't need one because you are her maid of honor."

I pfft at that. "She never even asked me to be her maid of honor."

"Noona..."

"What?"

Minhyuk blinks twice and then grins. "You're being really cute right now."

I grunt and raise my fist at him again. "You want to die?"

"I want to die." Soojung appears out of nowhere and plops down on a chair at our lunch table. "I really want to die right now."

I give her a strange look. "Why? What happened?"

"Nothing, I just want to die." And then she hits my arm. "Why do you never take my calls? I'm worried."

"Ow..." Is it the time of the month for her or what? "You know that I'm busy."

"Aish." She pouts.

"You're cute." Both Soojung and I freeze at Minhyuk's words. Oh, oh.

I watch as she direct her glare at him for a change and gives him a once over. "Who are you?" By the way how she instantly uses informal language, it seems like she knows or can tell that he is younger.

"Eonni this is Minhyuk, my neighborhood dongsaeng. Minhyukie this is my good friend and also your distant senior co-worker, Soojung-Eonni."

"Nice to meet you." Minhyuk holds his hand out and Soojung looks at it with a displeased look.

"Anyway," she ignores him completely and I wonder if that's how I appear to some. "Did you hear about the new stage set up? It's really stunning. It's going to make the musical so much more 'boom in your face'."

"Ya, you're really cute." Does he have a death wish? Soojung isn't like me, she will say exactly what's on her mind.

I give Minhyuk a warning look. Soojung hates it when people call her cute. She will hit you.

"Ya." She mocks him. "If you say this one more time I am going to hit you. So stop."

Minhyuk either doesn't believe her or he was about to say she's cute again because he actually has the nerve to smile.
"You're..." Oh, no. "Really pretty when you're mad."

I gape at him. Is he flirting? Is that even flirting? Is that how people flirt these days?

"Oh, really? It's the first time I've heard this. Thank you." Now, I gape at her? She liked that? "But... what age are you?"

"Old enough," he did not just. Oh, lord. "To drink."

"Ah, you're 22." What? How did she figure that out? She must have known about him already. The chairwoman's son coming back from living abroad became a big gossiping topic.

"And you are really smart."

Ok, nope, I'm out. "Ah, for God's sake. I'm going now. I had no idea that you were such a flirt."

"Bye, Noona." His eyes were focused on Soojung only, that smile still intact.

Soojung on the other hand peaks at me with a smirk like smile and my skin crawls. Even though I had joked with Lee about introducing Minhyuk to some of our friends, I never believed it would actually work out. I didn't even have to do anything.

Taking my tray, I make a run for it. Did this just really happen?

Before leaving for my doctor's appointment for my side pains, I go check up on the musical one last time. Technically, I wasn't part of the team anymore, as my classes had been moved to someone else and my main duties had been put on the appending work trip.

"Ahjumma." I rush over to her when I see her about to open the door.

"________-ie," she glances around me. "Where is Minhyukie? He told me he is having lunch with you."

"Ah, yes. We just finished." I smile and lean in to whisper in her ear. "I think he is working on getting you a daughter-in-law."

"But aren't you already my daughter-in-law?" Even though she knows she still... I sigh while she laughs and pull on the handle. "How is your father?"

"He's doing alright. Thank you for giving me so much time to look after him." I walk in after her and this time without having anyone else around I could finally openly admire the artwork that the staff had been working on all day.
It's quiet now and the atmosphere makes it more mystical in a beautiful way. Maybe it's a bit much for a children's play but the parents will surely appreciate the effort.

"It's pretty, right?"

"Yes."

"It's rehearsal time right now." My heart halts for a split second. "For the little ones."

"Ah." It sounds more like a sigh of relief. "It's been so long since I've seen the kids. I hope they aren't upset."

"They miss you." She looks down at her watch. "They should be coming any time now. The big ones coached them earlier but I heard it turned into a breakfast date."

"Big ones? Who—" I hear the door opening and turn to look. I smile at the loving sight in front of me. Hand in hand, each child was led in by an artist from the main musical.

It's a cute sight. Very innocent. Very heart warming.

"Eonni!" I step to the side so I could see the back of the line better.

"Sohyun-ah." Smiling at her cute, happy expression. I blink taken aback when I see that the hand she was holding belonged to Jungkook.
It feels like it has been weeks since I last told him I needed time to gather my thoughts. It felt like a dream. But my heart knows. We are apart right now.

"Eonni!"

I smile, pushing my personal problems aside and crouch down as she stops in front of me. "Aigoo, you look especially pretty today."

"Thank you." The kids were all wearing their costumes for the musical. "I heard you created this dress."

"I didn't create it, I just chose it." It's the first time to see it myself. The university nearby really had done a beautiful job. "Who did your hair? It's pretty."

"Jungkook-Uncle." I take a closer look at her braided hair. It's not the best and neatest but it's not bad.

"Uncle? Why do you call him uncle now?" My shift to where he had been before and spot him talking to some other cast members while the children had run to the main stage already.

"While he was doing my hair, it reminded me of Father so I said he's my uncle more."

"Ah." I her hair. "The other kids are already having fun up there. You want to go, too?" I stand up and hold my hand out to her, which she happily grabs.

Ahjumma was lightly scolding some of them to be careful. While everything looked to be quite sturdy, kids can be a force to be reckoned with. So, better to be safe than sorry.

"Are you excited, Sohyun?"

"So, so much. Eonni, will you be watching?"

"I'm sorry but I can't, I won't be in Korea at the time." Even though they were only my students twice a week, being apart from them had made me realize how much I consider them 'my' kids.
At her pouting, I ruffle her head softly. "But I'm watching now. Go play, I'll be staying here for a while."

"Ok!" With that she runs off and joins her fellows excited friends and adventurers and plays with the stage props.

Taking my phone out of my pocket, I take a photo of the stage and send it to my father. But as he doesn't reply, he must be sleeping or away from his phone. Since I had promised, I sit down on the stage floor, watching the kids play.

Being around children and seeing them having fun, so carefree, so happy, makes you feel young again. Not that I am old but somehow it reminded me that once there was a time when there were no worries, no restless thinking, just simple being.

Donghyuk, one of my quieter but very diligent students, walks over to me and sits down. I wait for him to say something but he doesn't, so I start. "Aren't you having fun?"

"No, I am." I lean forward so I can hear him better. "We missed you a lot, 'Ssam."

I'm more than just taken aback to hear the sudden confession of a 7-year-old. I was only their teacher and mentor but they had missed me and spared their thoughts on me. "I'll be back very soon."

"That Hyung told us that someone you love is very hurt." It take me a while to figure out who Hyung was for him. "He asked us to be very nice and to be good students from now on."

"Hyung? Do you mean Jungkook-Hyung?"

Donghyuk nods. "Is your loved on still in a lot of pain?"

"He is getting better. I'm hoping the more time I spent with him the more he will." I playfully bump his arm. "I didn't know you liked me that much. You're always so quiet."

"I don't want to cause trouble. Everyone is always so loud." He glances up at me. "I don't want you to not like us."

"Never. Believe me. I would never not like you. I think of you as my little bothers and sisters, you know." I put a hand on his head. "Talk to me more. I'll listen, always."

Finally, the little boy smiles and nods. "Can I call you Noona, too?"

"Mhm... You can but shh, don't tell anyone or everyone will call me Noona from now on, ok?"

"Ok, I promise." I'm surprised yet amused when he holds out his small pinky finger for me to shake.

Snap.

Even though people were talking and children were laughing, I hear it loud and clear and I know who it is before looking.
"If you use this photo, I will—." I stop myself because Donghyuk was looking at me with his innocent eyes. I look over my shoulder instead, my deadly stare meets Minhyuk's sheepish one.

"I thought you wouldn't hear, Noona."

"Ahjussi, I'm the only one allowed to call her Noona." I laugh in surprise and reach over to pinch Donghyuk's cheek.

"Donghyuk-ah, I had no idea you liked Noona so much." I see how Ahjumma is trying to gather the children and also spot Soojung walking to the her. "Come, I think it's starting."

"Noona, you aren't going, are you?" He asks me after I push myself back up.

I bend down and smile. "Don't worry, I'll watch you for a little bit." A smile brightens his face. "Fighting."

"Fighting, Noona." He waves then runs over to join the rest of his friends but not before screaming something over his shoulder. "I'll be a manly fairy."

Laughing, I descend the stairs to take a seat and check my phone again. Still nothing. It's probably nothing but nonetheless I was getting worried.

Snap.

Looking up slowly, I shoot Minhyuk a glare. "What do you think you're doing here right now?"

"Eh?"

"I said, what do you think you're doing here right now? You should be interviewing Hongbin-ssi, since he is already here somewhere." I turn him around and push him towards the door. "That's why you were hired, don't make him have to come back again."

"I was hired because of my mother."

"Wuah, so shameless." I give him a look and nod towards the door. "Go, do your job and stop taking photos of people without permission. It will get you into legal issues."

"Yes, ma'am." He salutes me. Why is he acting like this?

"He's cute." A feel a poke at my side. I jerk away.

I hold back a groan. "Please, if you two end up dating, I beg you, do not tell me the details. Do not tell me anything. I do not want to know."

"I only said he is cute." Soojung smiles at me knowingly.

I shudder. "Please, I beg you—" I was about to repeat when I feel my phone vibrating. I excuse myself for a moment and walk to the other side of the auditorium where there were no people.
''Appa, is everything alright?''

"Yes, I was playing with the kid next room and didn't take my phone with me."

The invisible weight drops from my shoulders. "Was it fun? What did you do?" I sit down and relax against the seat.

"We did some Maths together." I grimace at that. "Very easy, even I could do it."

He laughs and it makes me smile. "Do you want me to come back later? There is not much left I have to do."

"No, no, you stay away from the hospital." I can imagine him waving his finger in a scolding way. "Spend some time with your boyfriend or go buy yourself a new pair of shoes. Anything else but the hospital."

"I can still spend time with my boyfriend while at the hosp—" Suddenly, there is a sharp pain in my side. I in a breath of air.

"Hello? Hello? ________-ie?" I hear some weird noise. Was he whacking the phone? "The connection, aish."

"Appa?" I ease the pressure against my side. "I'm inside the auditorium."

"Ah, that's why..." For some reason he gets all quiet. "It's been very long since I've been in there."

A sound resembling a forced laugh escapes my mouth. "It's nothing special, believe me. Nothing has changed."

"You are on that stage now, of course it's special."

I take a deep breath and look at said stage. "I don't actually do much on stage just preparation and stuff." I hope that I won't regret my next words. "If you feel better one day, I'll give you a tour."

"I feel better right now." I laugh at his wit.

"Appa, what you need now is rest. I promise I'll show you everything one day." I stand up and begin walking to the exit, bending down while doing so as the female cast was sitting at the very front. "So be a good patient and concentrate on getting better, I'll visit again tomorrow."

"Ya, I'm alright." I have to smile because he keeps saying that whenever I tell him I'll be back. "All your life you've had to take care of us sick. We keep holding you back."

"Ah, what are you saying?" I start to open the door when I remember my promise. "That's not true at all. I should be doing this as your daughter anyway."

"Usually, that is the case but we haven't given you anything back." He sighs and I do too as I lean against the wall next to the exit.

"Appa, please don't think like that. Everything is in the past now and you're giving me memories that will last. So, don't think about it so much."

Two waving kids get my attention. Sohyun and Donghyuk were hand in hand trying their best to get my attention. Children are so cute and innocent. I wave back and wonder why my father hasn't said a thing yet.

"I'm very proud of you, ________." I blink because I hadn't expected that. "I'm glad that despite everything you were able to grow up into a beautiful and wise young women. And I am certain that I have to thank your mother for that. I'm also glad that I was able to witness that." He doesn't say it but I know what he means.

I'm glad I was able to witness that before I die.

My throat tightens and I feel the back of me eyes tingling. "Appa..."

"Ah, I'm very happy." He says and if I'm not wrong I could hear him sniffling. Was he crying?

Tears gather in my eyes at the thought of my father crying from happiness. "I'm also happy."

"That's good. That's very good. If one of us weren't happy we'd have to break up, you know."

I burst out laughing but at the same time a tear falls from the movement. "Ah, really, Appa..."

"There it is, my favorite laugh." I could hear his smile. I wipe the tear away. "I'll let you go back now. Remember don't come tomorrow. I won't speak a word with you."

"That's ok, we can watch a movie. No one speaks during movies anyway."

He mutters something under his breath. "Promise me that you won't come tomorrow."

"Aigoo, ok. I won't come tomorrow but best believe I'm going to be there the day after." I look at my watch. "Don't forget to take your medicine."

"Yes, yes. Your word is my command." Smiling, I hang up after he warns me not to visit again.

* * * * * *

Jungkook never thought that it would be so eye opening to watch children doing the same thing that he usually does on stage.
The difference is that while he always worries and stresses about doing his best the main concern for the children was to have fun. Both the Chairwoman and Soojung repeated countless times to have fun and enjoy the experience.
He was glad that they weren't putting pressure on them to do well, because he had no doubt that they will. He knows too well what it does to a child and how it changes them.

The exit door opens again, shedding some light into the darker auditorium.

________ had walked out a while ago and now she is back this time with someone else in tow.

If he wasn't wrong then it's Hongbin. She beckons him to walk first but he gestures her to do. She does and then Jungkook watches as the Chairwoman and Hongbin hug in familiarity.

Now that the attention wasn't on her anymore, she slowly scoots back away from his sight and walks to the door again, leaning against the wall.

He had kept an eye on her sitting in the middle of the stage watching her students playing around. What must she have been thinking about? She looked solemn and pensive. If only she would share her worries with him.

I'm going to hurt you.

And as soon as he saw in her eyes that even though she was hurting the most after whatever happened, she hurt even more knowing that she might cause damage to their love, he had backed off even though all he wanted to was beg her not to leave.

He had been hurt by her lack of trust in that moment but he had also realized that she didn't truly believe in her own words. So, instead of insisting he had agreed on giving her time. Jungkook had assured her that he would wait but...

He missed her terribly.

Today was the first time they saw each other after that night. She had looked so taken aback to see him, almost scared to look at him for too long.

Jungkook looks at her now. He could see that she doesn't know where to go. All the front seats in direct line of the stage were taken by the girls and behind them were more artists and then him and Seungkwan.

"Mhm?" Seungkwan's eyes stay glued to the bright screen of his phone even when Jungkook keeps nudging his leg.

"________ is there."

"Go talk to her then." Jungkook puts more pressure into his nudge this time. "Ah, Hyung."

"I'm asking you as a favor." He pulls his eyes away from her. "Please."

"Aish," Seungkwan stands up and scoots out between the seats and walks down the wide steps to greet her how he usually does.

But she doesn't jump like she usually does instead she just turns to glare at him, moving to say something.
Jungkook closes his eyes and leans his head back against the seat. Seeing her face made him yearn for her more, but even without today her image was clear and vibrant in his head.

"... Lay of on her for a while, she's been sick for a week or so and—" The same moment she pauses is also the same moment Jungkook opens his eyes upon hearing her voice getting closer and closer.

She seems surprised to see him which tells him that she didn't know he was still here. She must have not been paying attention. He can see it in her eyes. She missed him, too.

Jungkook inclines his head in silent greeting and she smiles weakly.

"But she doesn't seem to mind, she isn't complaining."

"That's probably because she doesn't want to get fired." They sit down next to Jungkook with Seungkwan in between. "I'm sure she is complaining plenty to Joon."

"Ah, right, him... Are you going to the engagement dinner?"

"I know of no such thing." She sits up and looks at Seungkwan, eyes flickering to Jungkook for a split second before focusing back on her friend. "Did you get an invitation?"

"Yes, of course."

"Wuah, I can't believe it." Jungkook had gotten an invitation, too. He wouldn't be able to make it, though.

Seungkwan laughs. "Didn't you?"

"No..." She gives him a look for laughing and falls back against the seat, crossing her arms.

"That guy there," Seungkwan nods towards the stage. "I think I know him. He dated an actress, right?"

No one says anything. Jungkook wasn't sure if he was talking to him or her.

"Right?"

"Are you talking to me?" Jungkook and her both say at the same time. Their eyes meet.

"Ya, is this the couple sense people talk about?" She drops her gaze. "Earlier, I heard the girls talking."
Jungkook can't believe that Seungkwan was going to tell her. "They were gushing about how handsome and rich he is. He is an heir, right?''

She nods quietly.

"Isn't he dating the actress?"

She leans forward to look at Seungkwan weirdly. Again, her eyes brush over Jungkook briefly. He isn't looking at her directly, but he can feel it. "What's with the sudden interest?"

"He's good looking. I'm pretty sure he used to be dating an actress." Seungkwan doesn't sound like he was listening to her, he appears to be connecting the dots in his head.

"Do you want his number? I have it. I can give it to you if you want."

Seungkwan snaps out of it and begins to push her jokingly but he halts mid move. He peeks at Jungkook meeting his warning eyes and then clears his throat, dropping his hand. "Anyway, I'm just curious because it hasn't been that long."

"You mean in the news?" She faces the stage. "I don't know, he told me before that he used to date an actress but I don't know how long ago that was."

"Ah, so you do know." They were close enough for her to know that? Jungkook starts feeling something boiling up inside him.

"I only know because he told me, it's not like I asked." She stands up and looks at Seungkwan. "Because unlike you I'm not noisy."

"Where are you going?" Something Jungkook wanted to ask her himself.

"I have a doctor's appointment to get to." She looks at her watch. "I should probably avoid the happy hour."

"It's always happy hour here."

"Right..." She purses her lips cutely and frowns. "I'm going, then."

"Eoh."

"Good luck on your show tonight." It looks like she is about to turn away without regarding Jungkook even once but then her eyes move to him and she smiles softly, it just doesn't completely reach her eyes.

There are only two more shows until the musical is officially over, before she leaves for Japan. Three weeks. He will have to wait three weeks until she comes back. They're going to feel like months and even then it won't mean that she will come back to him. There is always a chance that she won't.

Jungkook feels an unbearable tightness in his chest. He doesn't want to lose her again.



— — —
so... your reactions weren't as bad as I had expected them to be... tbh I always expect the worst, and ever since I got that not so nice anon on tumblr I've been even more worried about doing something that would displease any of you. But I also had to stay loyal to the me who wrote the rough draft over a year ago and it's part of their journey so the more I thought about it the more at ease I felt about posting something so heavy.

.... jungkook's backpack still makes me giggle but anyway... ehm I will be in Hong Kong by the start of next week, it's sooner than I had expected and sooner than I'm prepared for and I will be staying there for 6 months almost *heavy breathing* I'm starting to get so stressed right now 5 DAYS IS NOT ENOUGH FOR ME TO PREPARE OMGGGG but one thing I can look forward to is the tour yeees! I just hope I'll be able to get a ticket orz and that the ticketing won't be when I'm in air unable to connect to the rest of the world bc I will be flying for almost 13h... orz
I also just thought about the possibility of them coming to Europe maybe after they have come back in July or August and started to stress about how I might miss them here and now I want to change my ticket aaaaaaah I hate this, why am I always overthinking ;;;;;;; so since I'll be hecticly packing and getting everything I need I might not be able to post again this week (I'm just saying that but I'm pretty sure I'll just stay up again) buuuut unlike last time I'll take my laptop with me yaaaaay it was a big mistake not to, not going to make it again. That way, I get to continue posting the story ^^ (I just wish it wasn't so heavy)