"Wuah, this is amazing. So much has changed but at the same time everything is still the same." My father looks around the theater in amazement. ''The memories and feelings are all coming back.''

Employees and artists have their own private entryway while the one for public use is on the other side. It's been a long time since I've last come in through this way but my father had wanted to.

I know that this is where he met my mother. My father has had more than a century to come to terms with my mother's actions while not even a full week has passed until I found out. The memories and feelings that my father is reminiscing about are something I can't relate to. To the contrary, I'm starting to dread them. They just make me remember how false everything had been.

"Which one do you usually work in?" My father looks back at me in his wheelchair, gesturing towards the many numbered auditoriums.

"Number 1." I turn us around. "Should we go through the VIP entrance now?"

"Ah, my daughter is a VIP. That's amazing." I smile and steer us back out of the glass doors and take a detour to the other more familiar side of the building.

I had been anxious to take him here. I don't want anything to upset him but when he got the permission from the doctor and smiled at me with such bright eyes, I had caved in.
It's his wish and since I was leaving later tonight for the trip I should put my selfish reasoning behind and do what I can for him.

Someone who was about to exit holds the door open for me and I push my father in thanking them after.

"I've never been in this wing before." I stop once we are inside to let him have a look. "Do you know that I met your mother here?"

"Yeah, one of you has told us before. But I don't remember what exactly happened.''

"It's very cliche to be honest. It was raining and we knew each other from school." I smile because it does sound very cliche. "Long story short, we ended up under the same umbrella."

"Ah," I can't help but to giggle at his tone. "Sounds romantic."

"It wasn't. We were clumsy and children." I don't know where to take him next so I move to the nearest bench. "You never told me how you met Jungkook."

My heart aches at the mention of him. More than the thing with my mother, I've been trying unsuccessfully to push aside that I missed him terribly. "Jungkook-Oppa and I, hmm... It's a little bit more complicated than your story, Appa"

He takes my hand into his once I am sitting down as well. "Tell me, we have a lot of time."

"Oh... I guess you could say the story starts with him. He told me that he first saw me at the Han River. You know because you always used to take us there we continued going there after school." I can't believe our story started more than seven years ago.
"Oppa kept seeing me there and then he saw me again at a cafe. That was the day Mom got into the accident." I take a deep breath. Talking about my mother left a bitter taste now. "And then through coincidence we met again in high school."

"Have you been together for four years now?" He looks at me, astonished. " You know back then for us that would have been the perfect time for a proposal."

"Not quite... and Appa, it's not like it used to be anymore. People keep getting married later and later in their lives."

My father nods his head, patting my hand. "Continue, continue."

I think of what to tell him next but then just decide to spit it out. "We broke up a few months later... We had just passed our 100 days celebration."

"And now?" My father was regarding me with a watchful expression.

"Now... we are taking a break because of me." I look down. Always because of me. "I told you it's long and complicated."

"But it's a very beautiful story."

"Is it?" I look at him funnily. We keep being apart. How is that beautiful?

But before he can answer, I hear a door being opening, the familiar click of the auditorium exit. I shift my head to hide my face behind my hair. I know it's them, and among them must be Jungkook. What is it with me and bad timing?

"Oih, Jungkook-goon," I turn to stare at my father, shocked. What is he doing?

"Appa, what are you doing?" My voice is panicky and he sees it on my face, too. He pats my hand as if to reassure me.

"Jungkook-goon." When I peek around my mane of hair I see Jungkook walking over to us. I grimace.

Keeping my calm, I stand up once he arrives and move to stand behind my father's wheelchair.

"Hello, Mr ______." I incline my head slightly when Jungkook's eyes land on me. "Did you come to visit?"

"Yes, today will be my last day with my daughter, I thought an outing would be suitable."

Eyes widening, Jungkook looks at me. "Appa, you're scaring people. I'm only gone for three weeks, what do you mean, last day."

"It feels like the last day."

"I told you I could've not gone." I look at Jungkook apologetically. "If you have anything to do, go ahead, don't mind him."

He smiles faintly but doesn't say anything else and also doesn't leave.

"Jungkook-goon," I really am scared of the words about to come out of my father's mouth. "Could you please push me? My daughter is really slow."

"What do you mean I'm slow?" I look at him in bewilderment. "I'm being careful. I'm not slow."

But my father ignores me and only looks at Jungkook who was watching all of this with something like fondness in his eyes. I look away before I can take too much comfort in it.

"I'm asking as a favor."

Jungkook nods and moves to take over but I shake my head at him. Why is my father being like this?
"It's ok." He puts his hands on the handles all the while nudging me away.

I sigh and shift around so my father can see the glare I had directed at him.

"Where to, Sir?"

"Where to, Daughter?"

Puffing out a breath of air, I glower, crossing my arms. "Why are you even asking me? It's not like anyone will listen to me."

"Jungkook-ssi, do you think we could go in there?" He's pointing at the auditorium.

"I guess so, everyone is having lunch right now."

"Ah, now that you mention it, let's have lunch together." I close my eyes at his suggestion.

"Ok." I look at Jungkook. How come he is so comfortable with this?

"Good, now, let's go, this old man here is getting bored."

Jungkook begins to push my father in the direction of the elevator but they stop when they notice that I was unmoving. They both give me the same questioning look. "Go ahead, you two. I think you're going to have a lot of fun without me."

"Don't be like that." My father gives me one of those parental smiles. I feel bad for acting up until I hear the words he directs at Jungkook. "Is she like that with you, too? How can you stand it?"

"No, she's much cuter." I stare at him, thrown off by his reply. Looking away from my father, Jungkook gives me a meaningful stare of his own before he concentrates on my father again. "Let's go."

Taking another deep breath, I gulp at the heaviness weighting down in my chest. Everything could be different right now, if only I wasn't me.

~ ~ ~

''You should take ________-ie bowling, I'm sure she will enjoy it.'' My father has been eagerly talking with Jungkook about their hobbies during lunch which I have to keep reminding him of eating because he hangs onto every word Jungkook says. It's only now that I found out that Jungkook had also gotten into swimming over the years. There is a lot I still don't know about him. I really don't try hard enough in this relationship.

''Yeah, I should...'' Jungkook says pensively probably remembering one of our previous conversations.

''You said, you started because your father used to be a professional?''
Jungkook nods.
My father turns to me. I've been keeping quiet most of the time. ''Have you met Jungkook's father, yet?''

I glance at Jungkook briefly. He is already looking at me. ''Mhm, yes, I did in high-school.''

''Do you think he would walk you down the isle, if I can't?''

''Appa.'' I call, perplexed. How can he say that right in front of Jungkook? What is he doing? This is too much. ''Can you stop insinuating how you're going die? Do you know how burdensome that makes people feel? Don't you feel bad using your health to get your way?''

I don't care about him joking like that when we are alone but not when other people are present, especially Jungkook. He's been doing this here and there the last hour. I don't want Jungkook to feel pressured to keep up any promises only because he feels obligated to.

Something nudges my leg. I look at Jungkook, his warm eyes meet mine as he quietly shakes his head once.

I take a breath and sigh. Dropping my head, I run my hand down my face.

''You're not wearing the ring anymore.'' My father notes.

I stop and glance at the bare finger where my mother's ring used to be. I hadn't taken it off ever since I turned eighteen when my brother had given it to me. ''Yeah, I took it off.''

''Did you get it when you became an adult?'' I nod, facing my father. He did not look at all upset about my words before. I feel bad at once. I went too far. ''Your grandmother gave me it to when I turned eighteen, too.''

I blink. ''It's yours? Not Mom's?''

''It was my family's.'' He corrects. ''Your mother must have still given it to you even after I left. It's an heirloom.''

That revelation somehow makes me feel lighter. ''I will remember that for my future children.''

''Contrary to how it usually is, it's supposed to go to the youngest child.'' For some reason, my father had turned to Jungkook while giving that information.

I can't help but smile. I get it, stubborn Dad. Your message is loud and clear.

I look back up when I see him taking one of Jungkook's hands and then one of mine in a fatherly way. He doesn't join them togetjer but he doesn't have to. The intention is clear.

''It makes me really happy to know that your generation is filled with such genuine and kindhearted children. You have to take care of each other, life will only get easier if you have someone who is able to create a world with you, understood?''

My heart swells with emotions. Why is my father making everything he says today sound like it will be his last?

* * * * * *

"Jungkook-ssi."

"Yes?" Jungkook looks away from his phone.

"You have to go back soon, right?" Her father asks.

"Ah, yes. We have to start preparing soon." They were currently waiting for her to bring the car around.

"Will you sit down in front of me for a moment?"

"Yes, of course." Putting his phone away, Jungkook moves and takes a seat on the bench in front of the wheelchair her father was in.

Once more he grabs Jungkook's hand into his. "Thank you for tolerating this old man's demands. I know you two aren't on good terms, but I just wanted to see for myself. I'm sorry if I caused an inconvenience."

"No, it's ok, it wasn't an inconvenience." Jungkook glances towards the entrance. "It's not that we're on bad terms, we're just..."

"It's ok. You don't need to explain to me, as long as everything works out right. That's all that matters."

"I just wish she would lean on me." Jungkook looks down at the ground.

He feels a pat on his hand. "She's a little stubborn sometimes and wants to persist on being independent but she will work it out in her head." Jungkook smiles because this sounds just like her. "She is dealing with something personal right now, and it must have affected greatly. Don't let it bother you too much, it's not you."

What her father doesn't know, that it is partially because of him. "She's not hurt or anything... right?"

"Her heart... is hurting." His hand was still held in her father's. "One day when she is ready she will tell you. Until then please be patient."

Jungkook nods but the worry is overflowing again. Just what happened? "I understand."

"That's it. You are a smart young man, of course, you understand." Again, a few pats on his hand. "One last thing before she returns. Our ________-ie, she likes to think that she can take on the world on her own because she has succeeded in doing so from a young age. I want to ask you, Jungkook, that when I leave, that you take care of her if life permits it. Of course, I understand that when the two of you don't hold such feelings for each other anymore, that it's different. I'm not going to make you promise but for as long as it will last, please, take care of my daughter. She's been alone for too long. Make her feel like she can be the person with you she never was able to be because she had to grow up too fast."

Jungkook blinks, the wheels in his head spinning as he digests his words. "You're alright, right? Are you in pain anywhere?" Why did it sound like he was saying his last words?

"Life is very short, Jungkook. I just don't want to waste any time." Her father's head turns to look at something. "She's coming. Do you have anything to ask or say? Just in case we don't get to see each other for a while."

Jungkook's eyes move in the direction of the entrance. She is indeed on her way back. With her hair in a ponytail and her casual clothes, she looked especially gentle in comparison to her usual work outfit.

"After spending a few hours together, do I have... your consent?" To marry your daughter in the future. Jungkook doesn't say but he doesn't have to.

"Jungkook-goon," her father saying his name like that was unsettling. What if he was mistaken and he doesn't like him at all? "My words earlier, weren't they consent enough?"

"Huh?" Jungkook . Did he just... An explosion goes off in his head when he realizes what her father had just gives him. He suddenly feels like he can withstand anything.

"Take care of her well, Son." Her father releases his hand with one last pat and smiles at his daughter. "Are you alright? Took you long."

"A lot of people seem to be getting off work. If we're stuck in traffic and I miss my flight I'll blame it all on you." She says jokingly. Her eyes shift to Jungkook with curiosity but she doesn't ask what they had been talking about. "We have to go now. Oppa, you need to go in now, too, right?"

"Eoh." Jungkook pushes to his feet. He clenches his hands into fists. He wants to hold her now more than ever.

"You can leave now, you must be busy." Her last word is strained but he only caught the change because he was looking at her.

"Are you—" Jungkook halts mid sentence when she put her index finger over while shaking her head.

"Appa, say bye to Oppa." She was concentrating very hard on not showing her discomfort and when he spots her pressing a hand to her stomach, he frowns.

Then he remembers her mentioning a doctor's appointment before. Is she sick? His worry immediately spikes.

"I already did earlier." Jungkook glances at her father and smiles briefly before moving back to watch her.

She starts to leave but Jungkook catches her arm before she can. Since she asked him not to say anything he won't but she can read his eyes easily. Her eyes are round and then moves in silence. I'm ok.
Observing her face for a moment longer, he nods carefully and releases her arm.

She nods too and turns but he surprises himself in stopping her again, this time holding her hand. Her eyes wide and he can see her gulp. He stares at her no words forming. It's been too long. He tightens his fingers around her and pulls her ever so slightly closer.

Her eyes move from his right to his left and back again. ''Oppa, I have to go.''
Compared to how she has been speaking to him before in a careful, wary way not wanting to give anything way, this time her tone conveyed her emotions. In that moment, she doesn't want to go.

Jungkook steps closer. ''________-ie...'' She just keeps staring up at him with those eyes. The eyes that he fell for because they were always so genuine towards him. He wanted to talk about it now, their relationship but the way she acted and chose her words carefully around her father today, told him that she didn't want him to know the details. So, for her, Jungkook keeps it back and along lets go of her hand.
''Is there someone that will take care of your father, while you are gone?''

She blinks up at him and then at her hand for a moment. ''Ehm, yeah, I privately hired someone...''

These few hours, through his humor and light way of speaking, her father had grown close to Jungkook's heart. For her but also for the thought that he didn't want the world lose one more great hearted person who learned from his mistakes, Jungkook felt relieved to hear that someone will be there for her father at all times and hoped that just this one time some miracle will happen.

She had been staring at him, awaiting his next words but when he just looks back, she nods again and turns and this time he lets her.

She leaves today. All this time he had been dreading this day. It feels like she will never come back.

Jungkook feels something tightening in him as he like many times before watches her retreating back.

No wonder she always walks away from him, he always lets her.



— — —
I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack! How long has it been? One week? More... I think... anyway thanks to everyone that me warm messages wishing for a safe journey and told me not to stress about anything here... I did stress but it was just because I was dreading the long flight and transition in London but everything went smoothly... I just had close to no sleep *cries a bit at the memory* 
The night I landed, we had gone out for dinner and I am not exaggerating when I say I felt lightheaded while walking back. I didn't even have the energy to eat, I only did because I knew I needed to. I crashed in 5 seconds after washing up, I had been on my phone catching up on twitter but I swear I felt my head spinning even in bed, so I was like nope sorry bangtan gotta sleep haha

I napped a few hours earlier which means I won't be sleeping tonight I guess I'll be editing some more :P

ehm..... anyone here in hong kong and planning or hoping to get tickets to bts' concert or maybe had some experience? I feel so clueless tbh, I don't know anything TT help... it doesn't help that I can't read chinese T^T... I need to follow some bts hk fanbases

(I really don't know why I thought it was a good idea to stay here for the summer, me and heat don't do well together at all orz)

oh yeah NAMJOON AND WALE COLLAB can you believe they had the nerve to drop it right when I boarded the first flight -.- I was like really? now? really???? when I have to turn off my phone??? COME ON!!! but yeah hehe I love it!