Anyeong!!! //rui frantically waving at you//

So I think that we are all having separation anxiety with YG TRAPPED. Believe me, I do too.

I do read your comments, and it has helped me a lot. Please accept these epilogues as my way to say thanks.

The revelation of the real culprit was left for the Final Chapter before this epilogue. Yes, she was the person on the phone with SME's CEO, and even that phone call with Kush while Twosome was burning. I knew that if I reveal her gender, you will all guess that she could be Teddy's girlfriend, so I just referred to the real culprit as "a person" in the hints in previous chapters. ^^ Just to clarify for those who are asking. Hope you had a great time guessing. ^^

To my awsome banner makers, thank you!!! (*3*)

Hurray for silverlinings! Rui loves happy endings! \(^o^)/

A BIG BIG BIG HUG FOR ALL OF YOU WHO LOVED THIS STORY JUST AS I HAD FUN WRITING IT! - Rui

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EPILOGUE  HAYI POV

 

 

 

NYC

 

 

 

“Last day of school, here I come!” I cheered as I greet Mom at the breakfast table. “Morning’s so good!” I stretched my arms before sitting. Mom puts a plate of waffles in front of me. “Where’s Appa?”

 

 

 

“Your dad is still in bed.” My mom answers before going back to the breakfast she was making.

 

 

 

“Oh…”, was all I can say.

 

 

 

“Eat well but lessen the syrup, all right? You’re so energetic, you’ll be high on sugar.” I grinned at mom and she smiles at me but I know its not the same smile she used to have before.

 

 

 

“Actually, can I just eat on my way to school? I wanted to go early and have my yearbook signed!” 

 

 

 

“Are you sure?” I nodded, already putting marmalade on my waffle and wrapping it in tissue. I kissed my Mom’s cheek and gave her a light squeeze as I wrap my arms around her.

 

 

 

“Bye Omma! Love you!” I say before running out to my car.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Its been 4 years since we left Seoul and moved to America. 

 

 

 

Its been 4 years since I said goodbye to my old life.

 

 

 

Its been 4 years since I’ve been pretending that everything is all right.

 

 

 

But how can I not pretend when its so much easier to think that everything is all right than look back on the bad things that happened to us?

 

 

 

How can I not smile, even though I don’t feel like smiling, when that’s the only time I see my mom do the same?

 

 

 

How can I not laugh when my dad tells a joke when I know he’s also trying his best to make me laugh?

 

 

 

I hate my life now.

 

 

 

I wish everything was back to the way it was when I was 13.

 

 

 

I wish I never turned 14.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

At the sound of the bell, all students stood up and began screaming down the hallway like a pack of wild animals in heat. I couldn’t blame them. It was the last day of school! Its not like I want to join them though. I chose to let all the commotion die down before I went out of the room. 

 

 

 

I had to pack the things in my locker and bring it home. I’m never going to go back to this school after graduation. I look at the photos I pinned on the side of my locker door. I smiled as I got a photo of my friends back in Korea. I miss them.

 

 

 

I miss him.

 

 

 

Hanbin and I have been talking through e-mails. He tells me all about his training and how things were back home.

 

 

 

Yes, I still consider Korea as my home. I don’t think that will ever change.

 

 

 

I checked my locker again, making sure I didn’t leave anything before closing it and head to my car. I haven’t told you yet but I love to drive! Dad says I got it from my mom and partially from him. He loves cars, while mom loves to drive. So on my 16th birthday, they gave me a second hand mini coop. I wanted something bigger but my dad said that this suits me better. 

 

 

 

Yes, because I think I stopped growing when I turned 14. One of the reasons why I hate turning 14 aside from the events that drove us out of my birth country.

 

 

 

I check my watch. Its just 3 in the afternoon. I grin and head to the train station. It wasn’t that far from school so I get there in 5 minutes and park my car before buying a ticket and hopping on a train to Manhattan.

 

 

 

This is what keeps me happy. My few visits to the city where I can make music.

 

 

 

After a few stops, I’m on my way to my temporary heaven, 1115 Broadway. As I enter the building, I greet the guard who smiles back at me then run to the elevator to get to my designated floor.

 

 

 

Things are pretty much different over here. Very different, in fact. If YGE’s office in Korea is a cozy laid back place, almost like its Wonderland, this place is very much an office, boring and busy.

 

 

 

I greet Peter, the Korean rep of YGE in New York. “Aren’t you going to get in trouble? Its a school day and you shouldn’t be here.”

 

 

 

“Last day of school.” I say to him and his mouth forms an “O”. 

 

 

 

“Is Appa here?” I ask. Oh, I also forgot to mention. Appa still works for YGE. Mostly, he works at home but he’s also called to the main office here in Manhattan where meetings are held. He is still one hell of a producer and his songs still make it top.

 

 

 

“Ani, he’s not. He didn’t come here today. Though I just talked to him earlier by phone.”

 

 

 

“Did he say anything about…you know?”

 

 

 

“What?”

 

 

 

“If he’s going to Korea?” Peter shook his head and I felt like I was bricked. My longing for my country is getting out of hand. “Is there a room I can use today?” I ask him, changing the topic.

 

 

 

“Hayi, you’re still working on your demos?”

 

 

 

“Of course, I am. Have you asked the bosses to listen to it?” Peter nodded but his silence after, meant that my demos were still not good enough. I smile at him. “Doesn’t matter. I’ll just try and try!”

 

 

 

“Hayi, the people here, they aren’t after Korean pop music. They’re after something that will appeal to the Americans. Your english is good, and your lyrics are deep. Its just the melody. It doesn’t quite appeal to the general American public.”

 

 

 

“But I’m not after the American market.” I tell him honestly. “I want to go back to Seoul. I want to make music in Seoul.” Peter smiled and I knew it was a good thing.

 

 

 

“I sent your demos to Seoul.” He said and I jumped.

 

 

 

“You did?!? Oh my God, thank you!”

 

 

 

“I haven’t gotten a reply yet. I actually sent it a few months ago hoping I’d get a reply before this year ends. You know how many demo tapes are sent to YGE. Its a competition. If you would just let me tell them who you are then, it’ll be a done deal! They’ll even send you a plane ticket back to Korea! You are Kwon Jiyong’s daughter! Why would you hide it?”

 

 

 

“Because its cheating. I want to do this on my own. Appa helped me, trained me on his own but I want to prove something. I want to do this because I’m Hayi and not Kwon Jiyong’s daughter.”

 

 

 

“You are just as prideful as your mom.”

 

 

 

“I guess it runs in the blood.” I grin at him.

 

 

 

G dragon’s name is like a talisman. You just say it, it’ll grant you anything. Maybe its pride, but I don’t care. I have always been told I was good, great even at home but its not enough. By keeping myself detached from my dad’s name, I am more driven and challenged to prove something. So I hid in the pen name “Hi”. Omma always said I’m always like, high on something and I couldn’t agree more.

 

 

 

“The reps from this office liked 1 song though.” Peter breaks my train of thought.

 

 

 

“Which song?”

 

 

 

“It was unfinished.”

 

 

 

“Oh, that song.” I turned somber and he must have noticed. “If you finish it, you can hand it over to me and I’ll immediately let the bosses listen to it.”

 

 

 

“I’ll try.” I say to him.

 

 

 

“You can use the last room on the far left. Its vacant.” He tells me before turning to the person who called him. Seriously, they work in a music company and they wear suits. So tacky!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After about 3 hours of staring at the computer screen and coming up with nothing solid, I take my hard drive back and keep it in my bag, preparing to leave. I look at my notebook. The one where I jot down my compositions. I’m again on the last page. I needed a new one. Seriously, I should buy these by the bundle. I think I use up all the pages in a month.

 

 

 

On my way to the train station, I found myself wandering around until I noticed that my surroundings was becoming orange. The sun was just about to set and at the Manhattan Henge, you’ll see the setting sun aligning with the busy car-filled street. It was beautiful. It made me smile. I hear a honk of a horn and realized I was standing in the middle of the street so I run to the sidewalk. The driver was cursing at me. I said sorry and left. Really, I didn’t need to be in an accident. Not after… 

 

 

 

I shake my head to remove the bad thoughts.

 

 

 

I remembered that I needed a notebook so I entered the bookstore on my right. To my surprise, I could understand the writings on the books then realized, they were in Korean. I walk over to the magazine stand and see pictures of famous artists in Japan and Korea these days. My jaw dropped when I recognize familiar faces. My hand was even trembling when I got it.

 

 

 

The front cover was a photo of Hanbin, Bobby and Mino. The title said, “YGE Protégé”, Start of A New YG Era.

 

 

 

I wanted to scream, celebrate, howl with joy and most importantly, I was just too proud. I even wanted to buy the whole rack of magazines!

 

 

 

“Do you like that?” A sales attendant asks me and he’s Korean. I nod. “They’re cute, ne?”

 

 

 

“I actually know them. They are my friends.” He grinned and I knew he didn’t believe me. “Where can I find your notebooks?” I asked and he pointed to the far right. I take the magazine with me.

 

 

 

“You actually have to vote.”

 

 

 

“Vote?”

 

 

 

“Ne, 1 magazine, 1 vote. These 3 rookies are at each other’s neck for the next debut. Cruel, I know, but that’s showbiz.”

 

 

 

“Oh, so you mean, the 3 of them are against each other?” He nods and my eyes widen. “Can’t I vote for the 3 of them?”

 

 

 

“Buy 3 magazines.” He says with a smile.

 

 

 

Oh ! Do I even have the money? Oh to hell with it, I’ll get 3. I checked my money and it was enough. I still had to pass by the flower shop too. I can buy 1 flower. Its all good. I pay for my purchase, screw the notebook and like the guy said, I was asked to vote. There was a QR code on the magazine and I had to scan it with my phone. 1 vote for each magazine, I gave 1 vote for each of them.

 

 

 

Now its time to hurry home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Oma, Appa, I’m home!” I shout once I got inside. It seems no one was about but the lights were on. I put my bag on the couch and walk to our backyard. I stand by the statue of an angel and put my flower on the marble base.

 

 

 

“Hi!” I greet the statue. “Its graduation tomorrow. I hope that after that, Appa and Omma will let me go to back to Korea. I mean, I’m done with high school, right?” I sigh then stretch my arms out to the heavens. “I really want to debut. I want to make music!” 

 

 

 

I look back at the base of the statue and start taking out the dead flowers from yesterday. Everyday I come here to give this angel flowers. She was my angel. I find comfort when I think of her even when my life is so ed up right now. Even though she left us, and is probably the reason why my family has been sad all these years, I couldn’t dwell in that. She lives in my mind and my heart. I may have not known her but I’m never going to forget her.

 

 

 

“I wish you were here. I wish you could have lived.” I wipe a tear away as I thought of my angel. It seems as if she was with me. Always telling me to be strong, to smile, to reach for my dreams.

 

 

 

I turn back and see my parents watching me from the door. I smile and go to them, kissing them both on their cheeks.

 

 

 

While my mom was preparing food, I sat by the piano and started playing. I just randomly choose a song. My dad joins me and I can tell that he’s enjoying it.

 

 

 

“Play your favorite song.” He tells me and I nod. There was 1 song in my mind at that moment so I played it. For some reason I wanted to sing it again, my Appa’s song, Haru Haru. He sways his head at first then plays with the higher keys. Together, we were making music. I sing the lines until the chorus but I stop after that.

 

 

 

I couldn’t continue singing the bridge.

 

 

 

“Why did you stop?” Appa asks me.

 

 

 

“Its not my line.” I answer. “Its Lena’s part of the song.” Appa gathers me in his arms and kisses my head. “I miss her, Appa. I miss singing with her.”

 

 

 

“We all do.” I straighten in my seat and look at him. My dad has aged but still, he has those smile lines that make him look younger. He wears glasses now. Who would think that this guy used to run around the stage and give amazing performances?

 

 

 

“What time is your graduation tomorrow?” He asks me. “Oma and I are going to be there. We have reserved seats in a restaurant in the city after.”

 

 

 

“Thanks, Appa. Its gonna be right after lunch but the ceremonies might end at 4 or 5.”

 

 

 

“Does my Hayi want any gift?”

 

 

 

“You know what I always wanted, ne?”

 

 

 

“Dinner’s ready!” Mom calls and Appa stands up, not answering my question.

 

 

 

I never opened up the discussion of my desire to go back to Seoul again. I ate quietly while we all watch the news on TV and after that, I clean up. Appa volunteered to wash so I was sent up to my room. I got my things on the couch then get ready for bed.

 

 

 

I was looking at the magazines I bought then decided to pluck up the courage and enter my twin’s room. I knock but I know there would be no answer so I just entered then went to her study table. I put the magazine on top of it then my eyes went to my notebook. I placed this here a year ago, thinking she would help me write lyrics, thinking she could help me finish my song but it looks as if it was untouched.

 

 

 

I open it to check, and I was right. The handwriting was mine. Nothing was added. My song is still undone.

 

 

 

Without another glance around, I turn back to go out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I amble out of my room, fully energized from a good sleep last night and I see my whole family at the table. I kiss my parents and greet them good morning before I sit beside her.

 

 

 

“Good morning, Lena.” I say, but she just looks at me and gives me a small smile. “Did you see the magazine I brought in your room last night? You were already sleeping so I didn’t wake you.”

 

 

 

“I didn’t.” Lena said and I was hurt. I was genuinely hurt. Petty it may seem, but this just proves just how much she forgot what we both enjoyed! She forgot about our friends! She forgot about our dreams! And it most definitely felt like, she forgot about me.

 

 

 

Lena has become the most unfeeling I have ever had the misfortune to know and love, because I really had no choice! She’s my sister! I am obliged to love her!

 

 

 

The sound of the doorbell interrupts my momentary thoughts. I stand up. “I’m gonna go get that.” I tell them and ran to our door to get a delivery.

 

 

 

“For Miss Kwon Hayi?” The mailman says and I nod. “Can you please sign here and can I see an ID?”

 

 

 

“Sure, just wait.”

 

 

 

 

After I got the package, I closed the door and started walking slowly back to the kitchen. The box came from Peter and I wondered why he sent the mailman when I could have just went to his office to get it. I get the card and recognize his handwriting.

 

 

 

“Hayi, I know that you want to know about this as soon as possible so I sent it as soon as I received it. You know what to do. Happy graduation!” - Peter.

 

 

 

I stop to retrieve another box from inside. There was a brown manila envelop and I see the logo on the far right corner. My heart wanted to lurch out of my body. It was from South Korea. It was from YGE. Remember that time I got my YGE letter when I was 13? I’m having the exact same feeling!

 

 

 

I see my pen name, “Hi”. I read through the document inside. All that registered to me was that I was invited to audition in person at the YGE main office. It was signed by Taeyang and Yang Hyun Suk.

 

 

 

They liked my demos!

 

 

 

I was whooping and jumping and dancing my off in celebration until I see myself in the glass doors of the balcony. My reflection. 

 

 

 

Then I remember my twin sister. 

 

 

 

How will I tell my family? How can I make them agree to sending me back to Korea? What will Lena say?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

During the whole duration of our graduation ceremony, my mind was filled with thoughts about how I was going to break the news to my family. Seoul is quite a sensitive topic to them, to us. Not after we almost lost Lena.

 

 

 

I tried during dinner, but I stopped myself. We were having a quiet time and my sister even smiled a lot when Appa was trying to tell jokes. Lena rarely smiles and reacts. For people who met her now, they would think that she’s the shy and introverted type. For people like me, I know she’s not that. She was awkward but she’s one of the few people you’d immediately feel comfortable with.

 

 

 

I know because when we first met, I easily liked her and I didn’t even know she was my sister yet.

 

 

 

I should tell them when we reach home or I’ll never get the chance. We were all in a good mood anyway. When everyone was inside the house, I gather them in the living room. Omma stood beside Appa and his hands immediately brings my mom closer to him. Lena, on the other hand, stands on my opposite, and was leaning on the piano.

 

 

 

“What’s your big announcement?” Omma asks and I get the letter from my bag. I watch as they read. I look at Lena, she looked bored. She didn’t even bother to glance at the letter.

 

 

 

“How did you…” Appa started to ask.

 

 

 

“Oh, my demos? I asked help from Peter and he sent them over to YGE.” I sigh. I knew that this would be their exact reaction. “Look, I’m turning 18. Its not like I haven’t travelled by myself before. I really want to go back to Seoul.”

 

 

 

If you were with us, you would feel the tension all over the room. I only said that I wanted to go back to Seoul, but it was as if I told them I was pregnant.

 

 

 

“Hayi, we have discussed this.” Oma says and I was having a bad feeling now. “Your Appa actually needs to be in Seoul next month and we were thinking to go as a family.” 

 

 

 

I smile and hold my hands together. This is it! They were letting me go!

 

 

 

“What do you say, Lena?” Appa asks.

 

 

 

Lena, please say yes...

 

 

 

“I’ll stay here. I’ll be all right on my own.” I hear my sister’s cold and distant voice say. There goes my happy bubble. It just went poooof!

 

 

 

“Here we go again.” I say. “Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you?” I ask her. She doesn’t answer me.

 

 

 

“Hayi, don’t.” I hear my Appa’s warning tone but I don’t take heed.

 

 

 

“Lena, look at me!” I turn my sister so that we were face to face. I see those unfeeling eyes that for a moment I wanted to hug her then throttle her! Exactly, in that order. 

 

 

 

“Can you stop being selfish this once? Appa and Omma doesn’t allow me to leave this place because of you! Its been 4 years, Lena! Get over it!”

 

 

 

With a force that I didn’t know she had, Lena pushes me and I am forced to let go of her. She takes a step toward me. I took a step back.

 

 

 

“I’m selfish? Did I ever ask you to come here? Did I ever ask any of you to do things that you didn’t want to do? Did I invite you to share my misery? I’m trying not to involve you in my business but you’re the one who keeps pushing it! I never stopped any of you from leaving! Go back to Seoul for all I care! Just leave me alone!”

 

 

 

“Lena…” Oma steps between us. “Your sister is just…”

 

 

 

“No Omma! Let her talk!” My twin and I were having a staring battle. Omma was trying to defend what I was doing but I don’t want her to. I want my parents to stop treating my sister like she’s fragile China that will easily break! At first I thought it could help but as the years went by, letting her do whatever she wants, was just spoiling her. It clearly is not getting us anywhere.

 

 

 

I know our parents will be so broken hearted over this. I never fought with Lena, ever in my life, but I’ve lost patience! 

 

 

 

I’ve had enough of it!

 

 

 

“Why are we here, Lena?” I ask. “You think its because of you?” I mock. “FYI, were here because WE were affected by what happened as much as you were! How do you think did we feel when you were taken? How do you think did we feel when we thought you were going to get hurt?”

 

 

 

I notice that she cringed at my words but I couldn’t stop. All my suppressed emotions were flowing freely.

 

 

 

“You’re not the only one who almost died that day! You’re not the only one who feels so ed up because of that day! Don’t forget that we were hurt too and that was even more than what physical pain can cause! We’re here, with you, because we wanted to stay as a family, like you said! We wanted that remember?” 

 

 

 

Lena just glared at me but I wasn’t scared of her. My frustrations brought tears to my eyes. I want my sister back to her old self! I just want her back.

 

 

 

“We were never a family! We’re here, physically together but we’ve been more apart than when we got separated when we were young! You isolated yourself! You kept everything bottled inside you and you wouldn’t even talk to me anymore! I wanted to help you! I reached out so many times but you push me away over and over again!”

 

 

 

“I can’t act all happy like you do when I’m not, Hayi! I don’t have the right to be happy! I’m not even sure I should be here! I shouldn’t be alive! I… I…” Lena hesitates. 

 

 

 

I see my sister’s troubled eyes. She backs away from me and looks at my mom before she runs out to the gardens. Same spot she always stays at, by that statue of an angel, the same one I was talking to yesterday.

 

 

 

Four years ago, my sister was taken from us but by some miracle, she was alive. My parents were frantic when they thought she was dead and my mother didn’t even notice that her wedding gown was already getting soaked with blood. Omma and Lena were brought to the hospital that day. Lena was unconscious and Omma was losing so much blood. When Lena woke up and saw our mother, so pale and lifeless in her hospital room, she was screaming like crazy. Lena was never the same after that day. I couldn’t blame her. I would have been in the same state if situations were reversed.

 

 

 

But her guilt over our supposed sibling’s death was deluding her into thinking that she should have died instead! When we just got here, I understood that she needed time to get rid of the trauma. She needed our support. I wanted to help her. 

 

 

 

But its been 4 years! 4 years of trying to break through Lena’s barriers that she stubbornly put around herself, making her incapable of thinking about how we, me, Appa and Omma, feel! It was infuriating!

 

 

 

“Kwon Hayi, what was that for?” My dad was angry. I look down and support myself on the piano. “Didn’t we  agree to wait until she was ready to open up to us?”

 

 

 

“As you can see, Appa, its not working. We’ve been yielding to what she wants for so many years but she hasn’t even talked to us about what happened to her on our birthday. She doesn’t need time! She’s wasting it! She’ll regret the time she lost once she gets back to her senses.”

 

 

 

“Hayi, you should go back to your room.”

 

 

 

“Omma…”

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