EPILOGUE (MY LITTLE SECRET)
One Night Stand with T.O.P
EPILOGUE (MY LITTLE SECRET)
I kiss baby love's forehead one more time before heading out of her room, then do the same thing with Marty when I enter her room to check if she's asleep or not and to check if her baby monitor is but before I can go to my room I need to check on our youngest. A year and a half ago I gave birth... again to a healthy baby boy, Maru. He's been the apple of the eyes of everyone especially to Soju and Marty they always want to be with him and to take care of him. Maru is the guy version of Marty and yes I hate to admit it but jagiya's genes is so strong, his umma said that as if I gave birth to another Sueng hyun in the world. What happen to my genes?
After checking on them I went to our bedroom and take a shower, jagiya is still in YGE with the boys doing some stuffs, well that was he told me earlier. They're still busy as ever, nothing's change even though a lot of new groups debut they're still the best group and active even though all of them are in their 30's. They just finished doing a 3 day concert here in Seoul, of course the tickets are sold out in just 2 minutes, just like that YGE earned a lot of money in just a snap of a finger.
I'm in the walk in closet grabbing some clothes to wear then my brow furrows when I saw something. My box, full of memories, good memories, memories of me and jagiya. I smile and drag it, I sit on the floor and opened it. Everything is still here, the pictures, the torn resignation letter, the diary I kept while i'm pregnant with Soju and the small bear brick jagiya gave me. I grab the bear brick and put it on my side of the vanity table then went back again and close the box when i'm about to put it back I saw a piece of paper at the corner of the cabinet where I found the box, I grab and open it. I smile as I see a xerox copy of my little secret and I suddenly remember something, my old USB, I rummaged again through the box and found it.
I excitedly crawl on the bed and open my laptop then put the USB, I think I blush and my face is about to split into two when I saw the pictures that I saved before. I want to laugh so hard and roll on the floor, this pictures remind me of my old days, ME AS A FAN.....
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FLASHBACK
I whine and stomp my feet while looking at the item I purchased on the internet a few weeks ago. I angrily grab the phone and dial the number of the company, I really don't care right now if this is an international call or not.
"This is not what I purchased." I said when I talk to one of the employees over the phone.
"I'm sorry mam, we made a mistake. If you want ship that back to us then we will ship the item that you really ordered." She said apologetically. "I'm really sorry mam."
"If I send it back to you, when will I received the item I purchased?" I ask.
"I think it's 2 to 3 weeks mam." She replied. 2-3 weeks? What the hell! "Mam you don't like that bracelet?" She sound hopeful. "It's one of our bestsellers and has the same price with the one you originally choose." I scoff quietly. I know what she's doing, she doesn't want me to return this stupid thing to them. I take a deep sigh and think, I can't wait for another 2-3 weeks, I want to curse and shout but I restrained myself.
"Fine" I said in defeat. "I'll just take this one. Thank you."
"Thank you mam and i'm really sorry, we messed up the order slip." She said.
"Do I have a choice? Anyway thank you for the help. Bye"
I put down the phone and look again at the small box on top of my office desk. I rest my chin on the edge of the table and look at it, I don't have any choice though I really like the other design, it's much more sophisticated and I really think it will suit him well. That's right I bought that bracelet for a guy, a very special guy in my life right now and he's driving me nuts. I grab the bracelet and examine it for the first time but then I immediately got mad, i'm so tempted to throw this damn bracelet in the trash can, there's a tiny red dot on one of the lace, it's not visible to the eye unless you examine it really well. I want to call the company again but I really can't wait for another 2 weeks.
Okay Carla focus, just focus. I said, talking to myself. You don't have any choice, so just deal with it. Jeez! I look like a crazy talking to myself inside my office. So I put the bracelet back to the box and grab the card and write something on it. For sure he will freak out, once he read this card. I said again to myself then went to the HR Department and xerox it. Yes, I xerox that tiny card, when I get back to my office I take a picture of the blue and silver bracelet together with the card that says
To: T.O.P
I hope you like it
From:
Your future wife.
I giggle. I want to bang my head with all this crazy things i'm doing, actually i'm going to pound Glaiza's head this is all her fault. Now I found myself a hardcore VIP, I really don't like this kind of stuffs but because of her I suddenly found myself searching the internet about the five members. All of them are handsome but one of them really stood out and it was none other than T.O.P
I just found myself one day that i'm staring at his picture on the computer screen, if I can that damn screen I would. I even accept Glaiza's invitation to come to Seoul for a 3 day vacation, hoping that I get a tiny glimpse of him but too bad he and the rest of the members are staying in Japan for some promotional tours but none of my friends didn't know all about this gift. I sigh again and stare at the bracelet.
Well, I hope he will receive you. I talk to the bracelet before putting it back to the box and check if the card is still their. But I really like the other one. I pout and look at my surroundings checking if someone saw me talking to myself. I check for the last time the address of YGE on the courier slip before giving it to the girl behind the glass window and say a silent prayer that he will receive and appreciate my simple gift.
END OF FLASHBACK
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I grab the USB and put it back to the box then turn the laptop off, I check first if the baby monitors are that is place on top of the bed side table before turning off the lights. I lie in the bed trying to get some sleep while Maru is in dreamland, I don't want jagiya to take care of him since he's been busy now a days. When he's here in the house I want him to just relax and sleep but it's the opposite of want I want he just goof around with Marty and Soju when they come home from school and take care of Maru.
My mind suddenly drift back to the bracelet, that blue and silver bracelet. What happen to that bracelet? Did he threw it or did it broke? I don't want to ask him about it because he might get suspicious and I really don't want him to know that i'm the one who gave that to him, he might think that i'm a fan of his. Actually I'M NOT A FAN but I'M A HUGE FAN. I laugh loudly, Yes! I admit it now i'm a huge fan of Bigbang and i'm a proud charmer.
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FLASHBACK
I've got a new boyfriend and I love him dearly, the fan within me vanishes because of him. I momentarily forgot about the other man in my life including T.O.P because of him, I love him and he love me back, I can even see myself marrying him, having children with him and growing old with him, in short my world evolves around him.
"Why the hell he keeps wearing that damn bracelet." I heard Glaiza whines, she's staring at her computer screen and I think she's about to cry. "So the rumors are true about him and that actress."
"What's wrong with you?"
"Look." She points at the screen and pout. "He keeps wearing it, I started to notice it in Se7en's promotion for Digital Bounce." She said. "That damn blue bracelet." She blurted out. He and Se7en have a song together? Why didn't I know about that? He and Se7en in one freaking stage? OMFG! I need to see.
"Are you done whining?" I said and look at her. "Read these documents then summarized it, I need that this afternoon." I said and leave her.
I went back to my office and start to search some fancams or whatever I can find on the net where I can watch T.O.P and Se7en collaborating in one song. Damn it! having a boyfriend had some disadvantages, the fangirl inside me is slowly dying. I pause then squint my eyes on the computer screen.
. I blurted out loudly. No! That can't be. I squint again my eyes and play the video, my eyes are focusing on T.O.P's right wrist. Is that the blue and silver bracelet I bought for him? I can't really see it since he's wearing a suit plus he keeps moving. I try to squint my eyes again but I really can't tell. I'm sure that's not the bracelet I bought for him. I said to myself and I wonder if that bracelet arrive in Seoul safe and sound.
END OF FLASHBACK
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I jerk when I hear the bedroom door open, I smile when I see my husband carefully closing the door not wanting to wake me up but he failed, he pout when he see me awake and smiling to him but eventually he smile back and put his bag on the couch and walk towards me, crawl on top of me and kiss my lips.
"Why are you still awake?" He brushes his nose against mine. "I told you not to wait for me because i'm going home late." He kiss my lips and force his tongue inside my mouth and of course who am I to turn him down, I gladly open my mouth a little bit and his tongue explore my mouth, inch by inch.
"Is there something wrong if I wait for you?" I pout but still panting.
"I know you're tired just by taking care of Maru so as much as possible I don't want you to wait for me in the middle of the night jagiya." He said and stare at me, he still has that power to hypnotized me, I still have butterflies in my stomach every time he stares at me just like now. I smile and caress his cheeks with my hands.
"Have you eaten dinner?" I asks and he nods.
"I eat dinner in the cafeteria with the boys." He kiss me once more and lie on his side of the bed. "Miss me?" He smiles then slip his hands under my head. I nod in response and I buried my face in his neck. "Jagiya, let's use the Mommy and Daddy day off tomorrow. Let's go to Jeju. I have something to show you." He hold my chin and tilt my head to meet his eyes.
"Why?"
"Don't asks why okay? And besides you can't say no because I already booked our flight." He wink at me and kiss my forehead. "The nannies and umma will watch the kids."
"Okay." I said with a nod. He smiles again, his dropper smile.
"Good, I thought you're going to protest again." He said. "Go to sleep I'll just take a shower okay." He devour my mouth once again and lie on top of me, consuming me, and nibbling my neck, massaging my peaks and playing with my .
"Stop playing around." I hiss
"i'm not playing around jagiya, i'm just giving you a warm up. I want you." He said in a hoarse voice, that sweet spot in my neck. "I've change my mind, don't go to sleep wait for me." He kiss me one more time and head towards the bathroom. I stare at the close bathroom door, I wonder what will be his reaction when he found out about my little secret.
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FLASHBACK
Seoul
Its that really him? I ask myself for the 100th time. ! It's T.O.P, it's freaking Choi Seung hyun and is that the other members? Where's Daesung? Even though i'm a huge fan from the start of their career this is the first time I saw them in person. Damn it! He's really handsome. OH ! he's looking at my direction. Wait, where the hell am I anyway? I look at the glass of apple martini in my table to clear my thoughts, suddenly the ex boyfriend thing that looms around my head vanishes because of him.
Yes that boyfriend of mine just cheated on me, how dare him get pregnant another woman? Damn him! He's not contented with me I just hope that karma will strike him hard, so hard to the point that he will go crazy and do some stupid stuff to himself. I give him everything but he just didn't appreciate what I've done for him, that damn bastard!
I inhale and exhale one more time to calm myself, I told earlier that I will not think of him but here I am again fuming in anger, plotting something bad to him, I can get even with him he just have to wait. I gulp my apple martini and sigh. Okay Carla stop thinking about that stupid guy, move on! Focus! T.O.P is somewhere in this bar. I sigh again and look at the direction the last time I saw him and BOOM our eyes met and I instantly stop breathing and look at something else as if I didn't see or recognize him. Damn! I think i'm pregnant, he got me pregnant just by staring at me and to think of it we're both breathing the same air.
"Hi" Someone said behind me, I turn around and my jaw literally drop on the floor. Is this my night? It's Lee Seungri.
"Hi" I said weakly not because i'm shy or what but i'm freaking out right now.
"Can I sit?" He said. "Are you alone?" I nod meekly. "By the way i'm Seungri." He said and place the bottle of champagne in the table
"Glad to meet you Carla." He says.
"Nice to meet you too Suengri." I said and raise my glass, he keeps asking me questions and I don't know how the hell I answered it, my heart is pounding I can see T.O.P at the corner of my eyes walking... walking towards us.
"Hi i'm Choi Seung hyun but you can call me T.O.P or Tabi." He said offering his hand to me. I stare at it for a few seconds before snapping back to my consciousness. We shake hands and I smile at him. Damn! He's so handsome. My heart literally stops, then the other members came also and introduce them selves to me, YES THIS IS MY NIGHT! THIS IS MY ING NIGHT!!!!!
WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS THAT THE BRACELET?
I can't see it clearly, it seems like the same style with the one I bought but I think that's not it. I mean of course i'm hoping for him to use it even just once but I know to myself that it's not going to happen, I didn't even know if that bracelet reached it's destination or not. I sigh again, the four of them are talking but i'm still spacing out right now, I want to take pictures of them and post on my SNS accounts but I refrain myself, I don't want to be get kick out by their body guards.
They left and according to T.O.P they're having an MV shoot going on, I frown. MV shoot? Here? I just shrugged my shoulder and continue to drink the champagne Suengri left in my table, i'm still reeling everything that's been happening for the last couple of hours, good thing I didn't went out with Paolo and Chel because this opportunity will not happen.
“Need help?” He said and hold my elbow. Electricity run through my body.
“No thank you! I’m fine, you can let me go now.” I replied.
“I’ll just drop you off to your hotel.”
“I can manage, don’t worry.”
“It’s late and I bet you’re not familiar with the place.” I can't concentrate, he's holding my elbow and staring at me, not to mention he wants to drop me off in the hotel where I stay.
He looks at me and he fire his mega watt, dropper smile that no one can resist it.
“Fine!” I give up and smirk. “Don’t use that cuteness to me, it won’t work.”
“Really?" He said in a deep y voice and I almost fainted. He open the car door for me and motion me to go inside.
Then the next thing I know he's in my hotel room kissing my face, staring at me with those eyes asking for my permission if he can claim me.
END OF FLASHBACK
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I jerk awake with a loud squeal and scream, I almost ran toward baby love's room but my body is aching, worn out and over use because of last nights event, covering every inch of the bedroom doing all sorts of position with my husband. I realized jagiya is not beside me, I heard another squeal this time it came from Marty, both of them laughing. I can hear them stopping jagiya from tickling them, last night he didn't have the chance to bond with them because he came home late and the kids are asleep.
"Daddy stop." Baby love said in between laughing. "Daddy"
"I miss my baby love so much." I heard jagiya from the baby monitor. "The three of you are asleep when I arrive last night."
"Stop tickling me daddy." Baby love said again.
"You too." Jagiya said.
"Daddy!" It's Marty, I smile it's always chaotic every time the three of them are together always playing, running around the house but that's what I love about jagiya, even though he's busy from work he never fail to do his daddy duties.
"Daddy, i'm going to tell mommy that you're tickling us again." Baby love said.
"Mommy is still asleep." Jagiya chuckles and another round of giggles erupt.
"Daddy stop! I'm hungry, I want to eat breakfast."
"Me too daddy." Marty butted in, still laughing.
Suddenly the three of them stop when they heard Maru cried, there are footsteps everywhere, running here and there. Our baby Maru cries non-stop probably he's hungry or his diaper need to be changed.
"Baby Maru." I heard Marty say. She's in Maru's room right now, I can hear her from the baby monitor.
"Are you hungry? Good morning Maru." It's baby love.
"Daddy, put him in the bed." It's Marty again.
"Daddy give him milk and change his diaper." Baby love said.
"One order at a time, please." Jagiya said. "By the way me and mommy will go to Jeju so the three of you will stay at grandma's villa with the nannies."
"We can't come?" Baby love said sadly.
"We will go their next week but for now me and mommy will go alone." He explains and I scoff. "Mommy and Daddy day off."
"Daddy put Maru in the bed right now." Marty demands.
I went to the bathroom to freshen up, I don't need to rush things since jagiya is with the kids, I can still hear them talking, demanding their dad to make a milk for Maru at the same time cook breakfast for them. My poor husand, for sure he's going crazy right now, just by the voice and demand of Soju and Marty is so stressful. I went to the kitchen and prepare breakfast for us, Rice, tofu stew and some side dishes.
"Breakfast is ready."
"Mommy!" Marty squeals, bouncing up and down in the bed. Baby love retired from that habit but Marty replace her. Jagiya buy a king size bed and put it in Maru's room since most of the time all of us wanted to be with the baby and slep in his room. "Daddy don't want to cook breakfast for us." She pouts.
"Mommy, i'm hungry." Baby love said.
"And daddy keeps on tickling us." Marty said.
"Yah!" Jagiya said while holding Maru's feeding bottle which made the two girls giggle.
"I know, I heard the both of you squealing." I said. "Go out now and eat." I add. "Give me Maru so that you can eat breakfast jagiya."
"Let's just put him in his crib jagiya." He said and go out while carrying Maru.
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"Behave while me and mommy are away." Jagiya said, talking to his girls. We drop them off to the villa before heading to Incheon Airport.
"Yes daddy." They said in unison.
"Look after Maru okay?" He said and they nod. "See you after 3 days." 3 DAYS? I was dumbfounded for a moment, i thought we will be back tonight.
"3 days?" He look at me with a grin on his face.
"Yes 3 days jagiya." He smiles. "Let's go." I kiss my 3 kids goodbye and tell them that I love them so much.
I'm reading a book while waiting for the plane to take off, jagiya is beside me busy rummaging his bag looking for something, sighing and clicking his tongue once in a while. I stare at him in silence, he's like baby love and Marty whining quietly when something didn't go well on what they plan. He suddenly smile and grab something in his bag, I don't see what it is but I feel he relaxed a lot.
"Finally found what you're looking for?"
"Yes!" He smiles. "Did you see it?" He adds, closing his bag.
"No!" I shake my head. "What's that?"
"Nothing."
"Okay."
I'ts much more colder here in Jeju compare to Seoul, so when we arrive in our house I immediately go to our bedroom and sleep, I let jagiya do his thing, he said he need to do something important. For me any kind of traveling is exhausting so when my body lay on the bed I dozed-off.
It's dawn when I wake up, stretching my body a couple of times before I realized i'm alone in the bedroom. Well, i'm used to it, I take a quick shower before I haunt for my husband around the house.
"Baby love are you sure, you and Marty put it back in my bag?"
"Yes daddy, we put everything in your bag before we leave earlier."
"Daddy can't find it."
"Daddy check your wallet, I ask Marty to put the small papers in your wallet."
"Wait." Jagiya said and grab his wallet, checking every piece of paper, he smiles when he spot a small envelope and open it.
"Got it." He said again to baby love.
"Okay daddy." He turn around and he saw me standing at the corner, he smile at me while stretching his arms wide open. I half run towards him and he hugs me tightly, never letting me go. he nuzzle the top of my head and kiss it.
"Mommy's awake."
"Mommy!" Both my girls shouts.
"Be good okay." Jagiya said. "And thank you for the letter."
"Welcome daddy."
"Welcome daddyyyyyyyyy" Marty butted in.
"Eat dinner now okay."
"Okay! Bye daddy! Bye mommy." They said.
"Bye! I love you both, kiss Maru for me." I said and kiss jagiya's chest.
"Mommy bye!" Baby love ended the call.
"I thought you found earlier what you're looking for?"
"Yes! But i'm looking for something else."
"What?"
"Nothing!" He shakes his head. "I'm hungry jagiya."
"Changing the topic rises my curiosity." I arched my brow and go to the kitchen.
"I'm not hiding anything from you Carla."
"Whatever Seunghyun."
"I'm telling the truth Carla."
"In no time I will find that out Seunghyun."
"I love you Carla." He shouts, walking towards the bedroom while clutching his bag.
"I love you too Seunghyun." I shout back. I really don't have time to think about that because i'm also hungry.
While i'm cooking, jagiya is sitting in one of the bar stool doing something in my laptop. I peek and saw that he's transferring pictures from his phone to the laptop. I saw one of the pictures of him and the boys, in YGE with different poses, goofing in front of the camera. I saw again that bracelet and suddenly remember the day I discover something.
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FLASHBACK
My head is pounding, I didn't know where the hell I am because the surrounding is unfamiliar, I roam my eyes around and I know this is not my hotel room. I turn to the other side of the bed and found Tabi sleeping peacefully, waist up, snoring a little bit. What a sight! How I wish I can wake up every morning with him by my side but I know that won't happen because in two days time I will go back to Manila, my heart constricts once again. Yes! this fairy tale moment will go to an end, I hope it will be forever but who am I kidding? I know this is all just a past time for him and eventually he will forget about me.
I sigh and stare at the ceiling, closing my eyes to prevent my tears to stream down my cheeks, I'm a fan, Yes! I admit but it's not a joke to be one. Investing feelings for him not knowing the outcome of it. Risking every damn feeling you have to a person who didn't even know that you exist in this world, it's like putting all your money in a bet you didn't know if you will win or not or in this case loving a person like him with all your heart. It's like a one sided love, Wait! it's a one sided love right?
My chest feels pain like i'm about to lose someone which I never had, my head hurts a lot. I think I should stop thinking, whatever happens I need to prepare for it, why did I fall to a guy like him? I turn my head to his direction and smile bitterly, I slightly tap my forehead, it's not his fault that I fall for him, its me who choose who to fall in love with. I sigh and slowly get off the bed not wanting him to wake up, he need some sleep becase his work is so demanding.
WAIT! Why do I feel like so sore down there? I look again at him and think, we didn't have right? I really can't remember anything except the girl he's flirting with last night in the bar. I scoff and walk towards the bathroom but stop again, where the hell is the bathroom? 2 doors and a sliding glass door. The sliding door is for the balcony while the other one is for the bedroom door so I bet the last one is for the bathroom. My jaw drop when I saw how big and spacious the bathroom is then I encounter another door, it's for the walk in closet.
After washing my face and brushing my teeth with a blue toothbrush because I bet the baby pink one is his, I make my way back to the bedroom but something caught my eyes, the silver and blue bracelet. I grab and look at it for a long time, my vision is a little blurred so I walk towards the balcony and put it directly in sunlight, I suddenly drop it once my eyes caught the red dot on one of the strings.
Holy Sh!t! I blurted aloud, my eyes widen and whipped my head to the bed. Thank God he's still asleep. I pick it up again and stare at it, even though i'm still drunk i'm 1 MILLION PERCENT SURE that this is the bracelet I bought for him, unless another fan bought the same kind of bracelet for him.
I put it back where I found it and went outside of the bedroom to contain my feels, my fan girl mode strikes again. I smile from ear to ear, so happy right now, I even jump and hug myself feeling giddy but stop right away because I suddenly feel dizzy.
END OF FLASHBACK
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"My wife is spacing out again." Jagiya chcukles and tug me closer to him.
"I'm just looking what you're doing."
"I'm just transferring the pictures to your laptop." He smiles.
"Okay." I said.
"Are you done cooking? I'm hungry." He whines. "Your husband is hungry."
"5 more minutes." I said and wiggle out of his embrace.
After dinner we decided to just stay in the mini bar since we can't go to the balcony because its so cold. He's busy surfing the net while i'm busy exchanging text with Glaiza, they wanted to bring Baby love and Marty to Gummy's birthday tomorrow night, I almost forgot that she's 5 months pregnant and we all can't wait to find out the gender of the baby. I glance at my husband and just stare at him.
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FLASHBACK
I'm staring at the floor to ceiling window trying to calm myself down. I'm dizzy, about to puke, giddy and happy to the nth power. Gosh! He's wearing the bracelet, the ing bracelet I bought for him. Damn! I jerk when someone hugs me, I smile inwardly and face him.
I turns out this is 'OUR' house, I almost somersault and do the cha-cha when I heard from his mouth the word 'OUR'. He tugs me towards the bedroom because we will re-enact what we do last night or this early morning or whatever time it is and did he mention that I agree to stay here for another two weeks? I should really not drink too much.
"You know what." He said and sit on the edge of the bed." I wake up early this morning and found you in between my legs, my weapon."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"And you know what?" He smiles. "You let me these twins." He said and squeeze both my peaks.
"I really don't know what you're talking about." I sigh and sit on his lap, both legs dangling either side of him.
"You really don't remember huh?" I nod in response. "If we make love now, will you remember?" I nod and smile. "Then what are you waiting for? Make me yours." He smiles. YOURS. . . . YES YOU ARE MINE.
I give everything and anything that moment, not just my body but my whole self. Investing again my feelings for him, offering to him what can I give. My feelings for him are beyond truth. I love him wholeheartedly even though I know I will suffer in the end so I will just love him silently and I won't regret this, all of this. Days and even weeks have passed, I get a glimpse of his real personality, I get to know him on the personal level. Yes! He's lovable, charming, bingu, childish, cool, hot, y, talented and everything you can think of and each passing moment my love deepens for him not because his the idol I love to watch but because of him as a normal person.
"Don't stop please." He said. I'm on top of him, riding, swiveling my hips. "Look at me." I stare and continue to grind. I come closer to him and kiss his face, he smiles and sigh.
"Why?"
"Nothing." He smile again. "I just realized something and now i'm very sure about it."
"About what?"
"It's a secret." He said and I stop. He clicks his tongue and turn around in a split second, now i'm underneath him.
"Yah!" I protest.
"Just make love to me Carla." He kiss me and start to move slowly. I love you... I want to say those words but I don't have the courage. I just smile and kiss him back, I know by making love to this man, I can express my love for him.
END OF FLASHBACK
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"Jagiya" I snap from daydreaming and turn to see my husband then his lips captured mine. He chuckles and bit my lower lip.
"Spacing out again or having thoughts with me in that head of yours." He smiles.
"I'm just wondering what would be the gender of Gummy and Paolo's first child." I lied.
"Mouth." I comply and he pop a spoonful of tiramisu in my mouth.
"Why are we here?"
"Because this is our house."
"I know." I scowl. "I mean what's the occasion?"
"Nothing." He said. "Mommy and Daddy day off remember?"
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FLASHBACK
"How can I sleep if you keep staring at me?" I said. Even though my eyes are close I can still feel him, staring.
"Deal with it." He say, I don't want to see his eye, I might go crazy if I found him looking at me. "I want to see those beautiful eyes of yours staring back at me."
"No!"
"Carla!" He warns.
"NO!" I said and pout. I hear him chuckle and feel his lips on my nose. I slowly open my eyes and stare back at him.
"Hi"
"Why?" I ask, he didn't respond instead he just melts me by staring at me lovingly. I think!
He caress my cheeks and suddenly his lips are on mine, moving slowly, it once in a while, tasting the combination of our mouths. He slowly crawl on top of me, crashing my body by his weight, I really don't care, all I want is him. He lift both my legs slowly and wrap it around his waist, I can feel his arousal poking my inner thighs, if he only knew how much I want him, how much I like him and how much I love him for sure he will run away because he will think i'm crazy. We're both panting when we stop kissing, still staring. I smile when my eyes landed on his swollen lips I caress it and plant a kiss.
"You're hypnotizing me with that stare." I said weakly.
"You had me under your spell, what are you doing to me?"
"Stop staring." I cover his eyes and breathe a load of air.
"Damn it!" He yank my hand and pinned it above my head. "Just kiss me Carla."
The kiss was passionate, slow and full of unsaid emotions. For me its full of love but everyone who is inlove feels that way right? Everything the one you love do or say feels like heaven to you, that's what i'm feeling right now. He said he's under my spell but it's the other way around, it feels good and at the same time my heart breaks because this could end anytime.
My train of thoughts vanish when I feel his invades me, the slowness of his movements and the way we make love right now makes my heart flutter, make it skip a beat. I don't think I can say to him the I LOVE YOU word, so I will keep it to myself for a while or I will leave him a letter and tell him everything about my feelings and the bracelet when I go back to Manila, that's a good idea, I will do that.
"Don't think about anything or someone else." He said. "As long as we're together I want you to just think about us, just us Carla."
"Us?" I almost choke. US
"YES US." He kiss me tenderly. "ME AND YOU."
END OF FLASHBACK
===================================================================================================================
It's all the same routine the next day, we just stay inside the house doing this and that, cleaning the kids' room and the entire house, it feels like not the Mommy and Daddy day off. I expect something romantic or sweet from my husband but my instincts failed me.
"Are we going home tomorrow?" I ask.
"Yup, why? Do you want to stay longer?" He ask back and I shake my head. "Just tell me, I can asks Manager Lee to re-booked our flight."
"No need" I said. "I already miss the kids." I look at him and start to eat grilled fish we bought this morning.
"They're fine, don't worry about them"
"I know."
"After dinner I will tell you something jagiya."
"What?"
"Stop asking." He smiles. "After dinner okay?" I just nod and continue to eat.
After dinner I take a quick shower then call my kids before I haunt for my husband, he's in our bedroom, freshly showered, standing beside our bed while holding something behind his back. I walk towards him and stretch my neck to see what he's hiding behind him.
"No peeking jagiya." He said while wiggling his finger.
"What's that?" I ask. "You're hiding something behind your back."
"Secret."
"Seunghyun!"
"Carla!"
"What's that?" I arched my brow.
"Go sit on the bed." He demands. "Now! I have something to give you."
"What?"
"Stop asking. Now sit." I scowl at him but comply. I crawl up on the bed and sit, he follows me and settle himself beside me, hugging me with a stupid grin on his face. "I have a surprise for you." He said. "Close your eyes jagiya."
"No!"
"Don't be so stubborn, just close your eyes." He clicks his tongue and bite my shoulder.
"Fine! Ouch." I whine. I wiggle from his bite and slap his shoulder lightly.
"Close your eyes." He stare at me, actually his death glare. I immediately close my eyes and in a split second his lips are on mine. "I love you."
"I love you too! Stop kissing me before I demand for ." I hiss.
"By all means jagiya." He chuckles. "I love having with you." He said in a hoarse voice.My eyes are still close he keeps kissing my eyes and nose repeatedly and I melt at his simple gestures. "Now I want you to listen to my story okay and don't open your eyes."
"It's your fault if I dozed-off."
"I promise you this story is interesting." He kiss me one more time in the nose and he start to talk.
===================================================================================================================
FLASHBACK (T.O.P's POV)
Me and the boys are in the dressing room located at the backstage of an awards night, we will be performing later in front of the top actors and actresses of South Korea. My hands are sweaty and i'm a bit nervous, I want to slap myself because by now I shouldn't be feeling this kind of stuffs, i'm doing this job for more than 3 years now but my heart is about to jump off my chest.
"I need a watch or a bracelet to wear." I said and look at Eun ji noona who is busy checking Jiyong's outfit.
"The accessories are over there Seung hyun-ah." Noona points to the other table, I walk towards there and haunt something that I could wear for the show. Something that will boost my energy, something that will give me luck. Lucky charm to put it in a simple word.
"Hyung what's that?" I saw Manager Lee holding 5 bags.
"Fan letters and gifts." He simply said.
"Can I have mine?" He handed me one of the bags and I go to the corner of the dressing room, emptying one of the table and dump everything in it. It's mostly letters, I read a couple of them then put it all in the bag once more, I will read them later when we go back to the dorm.
"Hyung are you nervous?" Youngbae said, grinning from ear to ear. I just nod and smile at him. "Don't be." He said again and tap my shoulder. I check the gifts one by one, then I grab one small box and shake it. I open and found a blue and silver bracelet and a small card.
To: T.O.P
I hope you like it
From:
Your future wife.
I chuckle as I read it over and over again. FROM YOUR FUTURE WIFE? I sigh and smile again, FUTURE WIFE.... FUTURE WIFE.... MY FUTURE WIFE is sitting in the audience waiting for my performance, she's one of the most popular actress here and abroad and I love her dearly. YES, SHE IS MY FUTURE WIFE AND I'M SURE ABOUT THAT.
I grab the silver and blue bracelet, staring at it for a long period of time then I wear it not thinking twice. The moment I saw that bracelet, I like it instantly, I slip it on my right hand and wear it throughout the performance until we went back to the dorm while the box is still in my bag and I put the card in my wallet. I don't know but I want to keep it, I want to read it over and over again, I want to see and hold the card every minute of each passing day.
END OF FLASHBACK
===================================================================================================================
My hearts leaps out of my body, he's referring to the bracelet I gave him. I slowly open my eyes and turn to face him, his glaring at me, his stare makes a hole in my head.
"Did I tell you to open your eyes?" He said in a deadly tone. I shake my head and stare back at him. "Then what are you waiting for, close your eyes again Carla."
"I can listen to your story even if my eyes are open."
"I don't care." He said. "NOW. CLOSE. YOUR. EYES."
"Fine!" I sigh and comply, i'm still shaking, does he know about the bracelet? But he still didn't confront me, well to be honest with all of you, he receive a lot of letters and gifts everyday so it means that he can't trace who send him what and where did it came from. RIGHT?
"Don't open it until I say so." He's voice is clipped and cold.
"Just give me your gift." I said, I must keep it cool I don't want him to know about the bracelet.
"I really like that bracelet jagiya." He said. "How I wished I knew who gave that."
"You receive a ton of letters and gifts every single day."
"I know." He sighs and give me a chaste kiss in my lips. GOOD HE IS STILL CLUELESS.
"I have a story for you."
"About what?"
"About my secret." He said and I arched my brow. "Do you want to hear it?"
"Yes but you have to kiss me first." I said and he kiss me.
==================================================================================================================
FLASHBACK (T.O.P'S POV)
Nobody knows that I return to Seoul for just a day, our schedule is so hectic especially now that we're debuting in Japan, most of the time we stay there so I spend less time to be with my girlfriend. So now I will surprise her for our 100th day, I made a reservation to a restaurant for us and just to assure her that we're still good. I bought a ring for her, I purchase it last week and I know she will like it.
"Thank you." She smiles as she examines the ring on her finger. "It's beautiful."
"Welcome."
"I thought you forgot about this day."
"How can I forgot such an important day like this?" I smile and pour wine in her glass. "Let's eat and celebrate."
"I wish you can stay for the night." She look at me.
"I want to but you know I can't, I have work tomorrow."
"I know and I understand." She grab something in her bag and gave it to me. "Here." I open it and smile. "Wear it."
"Thank you." I grab the bracelet and put it on my left wrist.
"Right." She said. "I want you to put that bracelet on your right wrist." I comply and transfer it to my other hand.
"It's beautiful." I smile at her and stare at her gift.
"Remove the other bracelet." She said. "I don't want to see you wear that bracelet."
"What? Are you serious? We've already discuss about it."
"Just remove it."
"Fine" I sigh and even though it's against my will I remove it and put it on my pocket.
"Give me that." She said again. "I'll throw it."
"You don't need to throw it, it's a gift from a fan i'll just keep it."
"Good! I'll just go to the restroom."
I sigh and grab again the blue and silver bracelet. 5 minutes didn't even passed by but I feel incomplete again. I will just endure it for my girlfriend, I will wear it some other time or maybe just keep it in the box, I know she's jealous about the bracelet maybe just by not wearing it will be the best thing for us. While i'm waiting for her inside the VIP lounge of the restaurant I spotted a girl enter and walk towards a table. She pouts and sigh, she seem to be in a bad mood. I find her interesting, I keep staring at her, watching her every move, she's all by herself I wonder what happen to her.
The dinner date is almost finish and we had a petty quarrel but I know it will be fix in no time, I want to give her a ride back to her house but I need to hurry up because I have to catch a flight bound to Japan.
"Don't be mad okay?" I said and caress her shoulders, combing her hair using my fingers.
"I'm sorry." She hugs me.
"Don't be." I kiss her forehead and smile. "I'll see you next week."
"Okay bye." She kiss my lips. "I love you." And she leave. I glance back where the girl is sitting she's still there, drinking. I only see her left profile but I know she's beautiful even though she's not smiling.
"Seung hyun let's go." Manager Lee said. He grab my bag and ushered me discreetly out of the restaurant then ride at the company van.
"Hyung, tell the waiter to give this to that girl." I point and hand a piece of paper.
"Who is she?"
"She help me a while ago." I smile. The waiter hand her the paper and she read it, she roam her head around the restaurant but not in my direction. Even though the date didn't go well, she made my night complete.
Please don't frown, you're too beautiful to pout and
scowl. Thank you for completing my night,
you turn my bad night to a good one.
END OF FLASHBACK
================================================================================================================
I open my eyes and look at him, he covered my eyes with his left hand and slipped something on my right wrist. He is smiling when he remove his hand on my eyes and wiggle his right hand then point at mine. He kiss my lips tenderly and I almost choke because of emotions that swarming inside me.
"I finally found the girl that gave me the bracelet with card and letters with TO MY FUTURE HUSBAND and YOUR FUTURE WIFE on it. It was you jagiya." He smiles.
"Me?" I act innocently.
"Don't act like that. Soju and Marty found everything in your old stuffs."
"I thought i'm doing a good job hiding that secret of mine."
"Well you're not." He tucks his tongue out. "And you know what, I didn't realized that I fell in love with you in front of my girlfriend."
"What?" I want to somersault. "Say what?"
"The girl in my story that's you." He said.
"What?" He grab something under the pillow and show it to me.
"I'm the one who gave you the letter." He said he's holding a piece of paper, the piece of paper I receive a long time ago. I keep it because that short letter made my day after finding out that my boyfriend is cheating on me.
"I told you, you love me even before you know me." I chuckle and kiss him.
"Look who's talking." He shot back. "I ask the company where you bought the bracelet to fix it but they said it will snap off again in no time so I ask them if they can made the exact bracelet for us."
"It's pretty." I smile.
"Even the three kids have the same as ours." He smile back ."I love you so much." He captured my lips and slowly lie me down on the bed. "I'm so thankful that I met you."
"Me too." I caress his cheeks and smile. "I love you too." I said and he consume me again, making love to me like it was our first, making it as one. "How did you know?" I ask suddenly, making him to stop moving on top of me.
"About what?"
"About this?" I wiggle my right wrist.
"Kids." He simply said. "They found it, in our house, in Manila." He chuckles. "Stop talking and just make love to me." He said and crushed his lips on mine and start to move.
The next morning, I wake up and stare at my husband sleeping beside me. I just admire him, chuckle once in a while recalling what happen last night. He already know about the bracelet, I raise my right hand and wiggle the blue and silver bracelet. I slowly lean to him then kiss him in the forehead then slowly got out of the bed to make breakfast but found something on the bedside side table. I grab it and went to the bathroom and lock myself inside.
"Hi! Good morning." He wrap his arms around my waist and my neck. "Did you sleep well last night jagiya?"
"How can I sleep when you're all over me last night?" I scoff.
"Your monthly period is about to come so I just want to waste no time because I can't make love to you for one whole week." He kiss my cheeks and bite my earlobe.
"Stop making me wet." I hiss and turn to face him.
"I love to make you wet and sticky and sweaty and ." He look me straight in the eyes, flirting with me, hypnotizing me.
"Stop!"
"Let's go back to bed. Please"
"Fine!" I smile. "Carry me." He chuckles and grab my making me squeal. "Wrap your legs around my waist jagiya." I comply and he walk towards the bedroom.
"Mommy, Daddy." We both heard Soju and Marty shouting and banging the main door. I look at him and he sighs.
"Why did I let them follow us?" He whines and put me down. "Let's continue this tonight jagiya." He kiss my lips and open the door, the two girls jump towards him while Suengri and Daesung are behind them. Martha is carrying Maru while waving at me.
"Here" Martha said and I carry Maru.
"Thank you for bringing the kids here." Jagiya said.
"No problem hyung." Daesung said.
"We will be back later, we'll roam around first okay. Bye" Maknae said and the three of them leave.
"Carry Maru, i'll cook breakfast." I said.
"You read my letter?" His eyes are wide while staring at the envelope on top of the table. "Don't read it jagiya, i'm warning you." He said while carrying Maru.
"I already did." I smile. "Now leave me alone, take care of the kids while I cook."
"I wish I throw that letter before." He said and walk towards the living room, putting Maru down to his crib then plays with Soju and Marty.
I shake my head and smile. I can't ask for more. I can't ask for more blessings because i'm going to be a greedy person. The four of them are enough for me not to mention our families and friends who support us from day 1, they are my life, my everything and I will do my best to protect them. To be a good mom to my 3 kids and a good and faithful wife to my husband, this is my story, my whirlwind story. I know it's not perfect nor close to perfect but i'm happy, really happy. I smile and look at my family. My husband and kids. Fate brought me and jagiya together and i'm thankful for that. YES WE ARE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER, WE LIVE IN THIS EARTH TO BE TOGETHER.
===============================================================================================================
T.O.P'S REPLY LETTER TO CARLA
To my future wife
Yes you read it right I calL you MY FUTURE WIFE. Happy now? I don't know why i'm calling you that but every time I read your previous letters it makes me feel giddy and it makes me blush. I don't know what did you do to me but I feel happy and complete just by thinking about you. Weird right? But I would like to point out some things if you may.
First, I don't like you to be as hard as a stone when we meet. I want you to be yourself, your real you. I want to know more about the girl who calls me her 'future husband'. Second, feel free to call me oppa or jagiya like what you said on your second letter. It really doesn't matter to me but you have to make a promise that you won't call another man oppa or jagiya. Arasso?
Thank you for believing in my talent, for supporting me from a far. I really do hope that I can meet you in person in the near future. Are you okay? I mean your recent letter made me worry, you will find another man that is much better than that ex boyfriend of yours, he's not worth of your time and love. Please don't cry and yes you are forgiven, i'm still interested in meeting you even though you cheated on me.
10 kids? You want 10 kids from me? What can I say? Let's talk about this issue in the future when we see each other okay? Just keep sending me letters, you really made my day complete and make my worries and bad energy go away. Hope to see you soon. Take care. By the way, I don't think you're crazy.
One last thing, yes the bracelet that i'm wearing is the one you gave me. Thank you it became my lucky charm. I think YOU ARE MY LUCKY CHARM and not the bracelet.
Your future husband
END
THANK YOU EVERYONE.... I CAN'T BELIEVE THE STORY IS COMPLETE... I HOPE YOU LIKE THE ENDING AND SORRY THE LAST CHAPTER IS LONG
THANK YOU TO ALL THE READERS, SUBSCRIBERS. TO ALL THE COMMENTS AND UPVOTES.
FOR THE LAST TIME I WILL PROMOTE MY OTHER STORIES
HERE'S THE LINKS:
THANK YOU TO MY NEW FOUND FRIEND, IF IT WASN'T FOR HER I WON'T BE ABLE TO WRITE TORN BETWEEN HIM AND HER
DREAM
AND TOMORROW I WILL POST CHAPTER 1 OF LOVE AND HATE RELATIONSHIP
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