"Micha open the door." Minki yelled from outside her dorm room. It has been three days since she locked herself in. And three days since Seoul Sports revealed her relationship with Hyesung. Once they did this fans started to speak up, showing proof shots and spreading rumors about her. One of the main items that proved they were in a relationship was the fact she wore his HatsOn jacket during the Haha Show. The other was a picture taken when she had dinner with Hyesung. Although she was wearing a mask and sitting beside him outside as he smoked a cigeratte they were alone. The follow up shot was of him holding her hand as he threw away the cigeratte and smiling at her. No other members of Shinhwa was there so they couldn't use the group outing excuse. Since the article dropped she has gained a certian amount of hate and demands to explain herself.

When she didn't answer on the first day fans started to make up rumors. They used Hyomin as a base and said Lily was a former bully herself and ran the school. Another rumor was that she paid her way into being an idol when it became under speculation of coming from a wealthy background. The most recent rumor hurt her the most, they turned her to look like a for dating Hyesung, making her out to seem as if she schemed her way to get him. She used the sofa cushion to cover her ears when Minki banged louder. Peanut barked at him, like she did everytime someone seemed to make too much noise at the door. Micha sighed, she walked to the door. Ready to just give into her twin. "Micha, are you there?" She froze at Hyesung's voice. She didn't know he was outside as well. 'What do I do?' She asked herself and looked down to the ground. Feeling unable to have the right to talk to him. "Micha, we need to talk." Hyesung said, not angry or in need like Minki's voice. He was calm, trying to make her not frightened.

Micha shook her head and slowly sat herself on the floor. "I am sorry." She whispered, vision starting to blur with tears. She kept shaking his head everytime he assured her through the door that everything was ok. That he was going to make it all better. 'Causing people problems again.' A voice rang through her head. Micha gripped her hands to her chest and tried to shake off the thought. 'It would have been better if you never appeared into their lives.' The voice rang again. Micha cried to herself when she realized she was hearing her own thoughts. She couldn't see past the fact that if she tried harder to explain to Hyesung that she wasn't meant to be with him. That she was a toxic being. He wouldn't be dragged down from being connected to her.

"Micha, I will come back tomorrow. Please open the door then." Hyesung said, sounding defeated. Micha shook her head, 'I can't' she told herself. There was a pause and she thought they were gone for the night. "I love you. Don't forget that." Hyesung said in a low voice, now there was footsteps to tell her the two men were gone. Micha tried to smile to herself, force herself to think that he was still with her out of love. 'What if it is because he has to now. Now that you already ruined his image.' Her inner voice said. Micha had a sharp intake of breath, she didn't think of this. What if he was now in a way forced to continue this? What if in reality he wanted to end their relationship now that it was revealed? What if he wanted to end it the second he was alone with her?

Micha sat in silence. She couldn't even bring herself to cry from these thoughts. They seemed to realistic. 'It is like with father.' She told herself, having been through something similar. "When will he end it?" She asked herself, thinking she should allow herself to talk with Hyesung. So he wouldn't be dragged down anymore. 'I need to help him. I should make a statement that we are simiply friends. I can buy my own HatsOn jacket and make up reasons for the other items.' She told herself. Her brain running quickly with ideas as she came up with what she saw as the perfect plan. "I just don't--No, I never should have been with him. I put him through more then enough." She told herself and smiled sadly.

'It is finally ending.' She told herself, tears welling up in her eyes. She would be lying to herself if she said she didn't imagine them lasting longer. That she might have him by her side for life. "But I can't have someone to love." She said, sad that the statement was proving true. She stood up and went into the kitchen. She opened the fridge and grabbed an apple and knife. She made her way back to the sofa and the televison. Following her new ritual. She ate the cut and ate the fruit silently as a rerun of Grandpas Over Flowers played. She feel asleep to the sound of the men happily laughing and enjoying themselves.

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She woke up to the sound of a knock at the door. Micha glanced at the clock, it read nine am and she couldn't think of anyone who would free at this time of day. She sat up and stared at the door, waiting for whoever it was to speak up. The knock came again. Micha slowly walked to the door. Trying not to make a sound as she went to the hallway's camera. To see who it was. "Micha." The voice spoke up, finally. Micha's eyes widened. She knew the voice but the chances of him coming to see her were slim to none. Micha looked at the camera to confirm her thoughts. She went into shock when she found she was right. "Father." She said, pressing the button to the microphone so he could hear her. Her voice sounded rougher than it did yesterday. "May I come in?" He asked.

Micha stepped back and went to the door. Letting her father into her dorm. As he stepped in he was the first family member to come inside of it, making her wonder why she never had Minki over. "Your home is cleaner than I imagined." He said, looking around then sitting on the sofa. Micha locked the door behind him and went into the living room. She stood awkwardly, glancing around to see if anything was out of place. And try to think of why he was here. "Father, I am sorry." She said quickly and bowed. "I didn't mean to bring down your name." She said, not looking up from the bow. "Sit." He said, Micha straightened herself and went to sit on the floor across from him.

"I heard of your recent incident." Her father said, Micha nodded slowly, glancing at her hands as her palms began to sweat. "What are you going to do to fix it?" He asked. Micha professionaly told him her plan she came up with last night, as if she was pitching something at a business meeting. When he stayed silent, not giving his approval she worried that she missed a step. "Would you be happy with the outcome of that plan?" He asked. Micha stayed still, not expecting him to ask about her happiness. "It is for the best." She whispered, sounding more like herself. When her father sighed she looked up at him, "Is that wrong? He would be better off and I can carry all the blame. That is the best outcome." She said, sterness rising in her tone.

"Micha, that way of thinking only hurts both parties in the end." Her father said. Micha frowned looked back at her hands. Even if that might be true it still seemed like the best option to her. "I can tell what you are thinking. You were always an open book for me." Her father said to himself, Micha made no movement. "I made the mistake you are about to make. I pushed away someone I love dearly because I felt it was for the best." He said, a touch of sadness began present in his voice. Making Micha look up to him, wondering who could possibly make her father feel upset. 'Was it an old lover?' She wondered. "Why did you push her away?" She asked, not sure if it was ok to but still wanting to. Her father stared at her before answering. "Because she was hurting infront of me. I wanted her to find happiness, even if it meant I couldn't be there to see her find it." He said, "So I turned myself into stone when I pushed her away. I didn't want her to know I was as hurt as she was when I sent her away." He said. 'Was he always this way?' Micha wondered.

Hearing this she was now seeing her father in a new light. He seemed less powerful then before. As if he was losing whatever caused him to seem strong. "What did you do afterwards? If you hated your choice then you must have tried to change it." Micha asked slowly. "I did try. But I lost the right to show her I was trying, so I settled on watching her. Making sure she got what she wanted and was able to search for what could make her happy." He said, shrugging when he finished. "I could do that..." Micha said in a whisper. Her father shook his head, "But will you be able to face him years after you hurt him? I still can't do it to the person I pushed away and it has been over fifteen years since then." Her father said. Hearing this struck Micha, if someone who seemed so strong could say this. What did this mean for her? Who couldn't go a week without feeling hurt by something. "Why are you telling me this?" She asked, willing herself not to cry.

"A group of people came to our home. Asking to see me. They had your album, a stack of letters from your fans and magazines you featured in. They said they were your friends, and started to tell me how happy you seemed to be as an idol and how you seemed to have lost your way now." He said, chuckling at some joke to himself. "They asked me to speak to you. Saying I had a higher chance of talking with you. Why? I don't know." He finished. Micha smiled and felt herself ready to cry. She couldn't have imagined that there were people actually willing to stand beside her. "Why would they think that?" She asked, when he said he didn't know she shook her head. Reminding herself to ask whoever went.

"But why did you come? You could have ignored them." She asked, playing with the hem of her shirt. "Because I felt I should try to talk to the person I pushed away." Her father answered. Micha froze, slowlying looking up at. "Micha, I am sorry. I should have tried other opitions and not just what seemed like the only one." He said, lowering his head to her. "I don't want for you to become like me. You share enough similar qualites as me, but sharing that path of life. Isn't an option." He continued. Micha bit her lower lip as she choked a cry. "Sit up. It's ok." She stammerd, wiping her eyes from his apology. When he sat up he didn't seem as cold as before to her. He seemed like something else now that the wall was gone from him. 'Lonely.' She concluded, wondering if people saw her like this as well. "Can you help me then? What can I do?" She asked, shyly. Not used to being like this with her father before. Him telling her personnal thoughts or her doing the same.