A/N: to sooyoung-shidae, so sorry for posting this so late! i didn't manage to see your request >< next time, just post on the fic's comments part okay? :3 thanks for requesting!

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Dear Diary, 

I'm heartbroken, again. Just seeing KyuHyun oppa together with SeoHyun makes me upset. Now he spends so much time with her, he doesn't even talk to me.. It hurts.

I know, forcing myself on SiWon oppa isn't nice to him nor good to me.. I thought that I could change my feelings since KyuHyun oppa was already dating SeoHyun.. Yes, they may have broken up already but SeoHyunnie tells me that she still loves him.

SiWon oppa, I'm sorry for what I did. This isn't true love on my part, and here I am forcing myself to love you and making you think that we are really a real couple when I don't even love you as that kind.. I only love you as a brother. Oppa, please forgive me. 

Jinjja, my heart hurts, alot.

I guess I should stop writing here, I have to put on more makeup because I cried.. Time to go out with SiWon oppa.

-SooYoungie.

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Dear Diary,

I know I'm too old and matured to write a diary (damn i've said this many times.) but I can't keep my thoughts all to myself. Perhaps sharing it to some random book will be good..

You see, I think I've never told you this before.

I love this junior in my school, she's pretty, tall, funny, cute.. Too much to describe on this whole diary. So she and I were best friends, until one day she went out with SiWon hyung, my other sunbae. She captures many hearts of many guys, But she dated only one, SiWon. 

My heart hurts a lot, I thought that she knew I loved her, if blushing infront of her, shivering from her touches and staring at her, drawing her portrait when she sleeps doesn't make it obvious.. I really love her. I know I'm a little too young to talk about love but I'm sure of this! And you know, to forget her, I did a stupid thing.

I dated my junior (also her best friend.), SeoHyun.

SeoHyun's smart, pretty, soft, gentle. She's a perfect girl, but the thing is that, I don't even love her at all. I only love her as a junior because she's caring and she listens to people all the time. I don't know what got into my head but here I am, hurting more than ever. I thought that dating SeoHyun would help me forget SooYoung and continue with life, but this girl.. She really captured my whole heart, I fell hard for her.

So I broke up with SeoHyun. She knows that I love her best friend too, so she totally understands. She was heartbroken too, but shortly after she found YongHwa.SooYoung's still with SiWon, I can't change that fact right?

SooYoung ah, why are you so dumb?! Can't you see that I love you so much that I'm so crazy for you now?! And yes, now I'm avoiding her and stuff because.. I saw her kissing SiWon hyung at the locker area. Something I didn't want to see in my whole life, but just now, I saw SiWon holding her by that petite waist of her's and pulling her in for a kiss. I may sound like a ert now but I really want to be the one to do that.. and maybe go further with her..

Aish. But it's my fault, actually. So you see, I'm a shy boy. I don't express my feelings well and obviously I don't have the freaking guts to just confess to her. So when I had the courage to confess to her that day, it got drained out when she said she accepted SiWon. I had no choice but to accept it too.

SooYoung, here's my heartfelt thoughts..

I really hope that you'll know I love you, but you already have SiWon. He's so much better than me, and he protects you so much better. I know that I won't have a chance to show you my love openly since you already have hyung, but I just want you to know that I'll always love you.

As long as you're happy, I'm happy. As long as I can at least protect you a little, I want you to keep smiling.

Because I love you.

-KyuHyun.

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Dear Diary,

so this is it. I left SiWon oppa with a heart which was broken. I didn't expect myself to break down when I saw KyuHyun walking with SeoHyun home last night, I was with SiWon oppa so he calmed me down and I had to stop myself from fooling around.

Why am I stopping myself from loving someone else? Why am I forcing myself to love someone else?

Yes, I broke up with SiWon oppa. It hurts me to see him cry when he left, but I told him that he deserved a girl better than me. I'm really sorry, SiWon oppa. But he says that we can still be best friends, so I hope that he'll always stay like that.

As for seokyu. (i made that name for them.) I wish them the best..

-SooYoung.

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The bell rang as students ran out of their classrooms to leave the school. KyuHyun waited outside SooYoung's classroom for a while, but he didn't expect to see SiWon alone.

"Hyung, you look.. bad." He said as SiWon gave him a weak smile.

"What happened?" KyuHyun asked again as SiWon walked with him to the school's park.

"KyuHyun ah.. I-I broke up with SooYoung."

"Wae?!" KyuHyun shouted as he looked at SiWon unbelievably.

"She initiated the break up."He said sadly as KyuHyun comforted SiWon. Just as KyuHyun was about to leave SiWon, he saw SooYoung.

His heart thumped faster than usual as he looked at her, walking down the aisle. He looked back to see SiWon's sad face as SiWon watched SooYoung walk past too. KyuHyun felt akward, he couldn't let his hyung get a heartbreak like that. He left SiWon alone as he ran towards SooYoung, holding her by the wrist.

"Choi SooYoung. You're coming with me."He said angrily as he dragged SooYoung into the empty indoor basketball court. He pulled SooYoung to the center as she pushed his hand away.

"What do you want?!" She asked angrily as she remembered him and SeoHyun being together. It made her blood boil.

"Yah, you broke up with SiWon Hyung and now you're shouting at me?!" He shouted as SooYoung looked at him in shock. KyuHyun had never shout at her like this before.

"K-Kyuhyun.."

"Enough. Go talk to SiWon, he's really upset."He said softly yet with a tinge of anger in it. Slowly, he walked away. He felt his heart break when he saw tears form in her eyes when he shouted at her.

"You don't understand what I'm going through!" She shouted as she stood there limply. KyuHyun stopped dead in his tracks. He couldn't understand why she broke up with SiWon, why she always had to make him go so crazy over her, why he made her so upset when he saw her being mushy with SiWon.

He walked back to her angrily as he went close to her.

"Choi SooYoung, as far as I know, SiWon is the best man in the world who can give you love and he loves you so much he's willing to go do anything for you and yet you broke up with him! do you know how sad he is?!Do you understand how he feels?! I don't understand why you're like that, being so selfless and stuff. It's stupid and you know, I can't take it!"

"AND DO YOU KNOW THAT I DON'T LOVE SIWON OPPA AT ALL AND THE ONE I ALWAYS LOVED WAS YOU?! DO YOU KNOW HOW HURT I WAS WHEN I SAW YOU WITH SEOHYUN?! DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND?!" She shouted as tears came out of her eyes. KyuHyun stood there, dazed as he looked at SooYoung in her eyes. KyuHyun didn't say anything at all, he just kept quiet. He couldn't believe what he just heart.

"I-I'm sorry for what I said, I have to go now.." She said as she walked away unsteadily, wiping her tears at the same time. KyuHyun stayed rooted to his spot.

"SooYoung.." He called out as he heard SooYoung continuous footsteps out of the basketball court.

"Saranghae.." He said softly as he thought. Why should he stop himself from showering her with his love openly too? Why was he being so angry?

"SooYoung!" He shouted as he turned around and ran towards SooYoung, hugging her tightly from the back.

"Don't leave me, please." He said as SooYoung tried to free herself from him.

"KyuHyun, you don't understand me-"

"Then I'm asking you know, do you understand my feelings for you?! Why I dated SeoHyun, why I tried to avoid you?! It was to forget you because you, Choi SooYoung, already left a big imprint in my heart! I love you too much, it hurts to see you with SiWon hyung." He said as he let a tear go off freely from his eye. SooYoung stopped struggling as she held onto KyuHyun's hands which encircled her waist.

"SooYoung, I'm sorry." He said softly as he turned SooYoung around to face him.

"I-I shouldn't have let you wait.. I fell in love with you even before you dated hyung.. You know.. I'm a shy guy, I-I don't dare to express my feelings, especially my love.. for you."He said as he cupped SooYoung's face gently. She smiled softly as KyuHyun gazed at her.

"Me too, oppa.."She said as KyuHyun smiled and pulled her in for a hug. "I love you."He said as SooYoung hugged him back. They pulled away from each other after some time, until SooYoung tiptoed and kissed him gently on the lips. He was taken aback.

"Oppa, Aren't you going to ask the question you wanted to ask before?" She asked softly as KyuHyun looked at her. He was still shy.

"SooYoung.. W-Will you.. be my girl-f-f-f-fri-" He stuttered as SooYoung giggled a little.

She kissed his lips softly but with little pressure this time. She couldn't wait for him to say finish the word "girlfriend."

"Yes." She said as KyuHyun blushed and hugged her tightly.

"Th-Then I'll see you at.. the changing rooms.." He said softly into her ear as she blushed, punching him using her palms.

"Yah, what's that supposed to mean?" She asked softly as he smirked at her.

"You know, everytime I see you, you just make me so.. hard." He said as SooYoung blushed.

"So what about the changing room?" She asked seductively as KyuHyun blushed a little upon his ert thoughts.

"Uhm.. We could get on with some stuff.." He said as SooYoung giggled a little.

"y kyu. When you just want some hands on, you don't stutter."

SooYoung said as she put her hands on his shoulders as he put his hands on her waist.

"Fine." She whispered as she grabbed her bag. Just as she thought KyuHyun would follow behind her, he had already sped off- to the changing room.

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y kyu here! ><