*Hello! I'm back after a tiring week, so an update for you guys. This is a really short myungjong version of a part from my own written novel that I'm still writing. If luckily I finish it by the first half of next year, I'll post the original long version here. And I fought my cold and tonsilitis well so I'm back with singing my fave kpop songs.

*And yeah, Sungjong's a girl here. Just imagine him having long black hair, sigh, so pretty it hurts. Anyways, enjoy!

“Finally.”

She felt her head throbbing from pain.

As she tried to change into a sitting position, she felt the burning sensation below her chest, but she managed to sit so.

She remained with her eyes closed, trying to just listen to whatever sounds reach her. There was the ticking of a wall clock. There was the chirping of birds nearby. She was listening hard, wanting to hear her mother’s voice; even a soft whisper would make her feel alleviated.

But there was none.

“Open your eyes lost soul. No one would hurt you here. Trust me.”

Trust me.

Those words sounds so nice at the moment. She needs someone she can lean on. She needs someone who can make her understand the situation that fell upon her.

“I need to know where I am. Where is my Mom? I need to see her. I need to know if she’s alright.”

“You won’t be able to see her if you don’t try to see where you are.”

She got the point of whoever she was with at the very hour. All she needs to do is open her eyes. Open it and see for herself.

Gradually, she lifted open her seem to be heavy eyelids.

“There…”

“Who are you?”

Sungjong’s eyes stuck on the image of a man who was wearing black suit at the moment. He has thick eyeliner on top of his lids, which suited his small eyes and pale skin. She tried to dig into her memory if she know anything about this strange man at the end of her cream-colored bed, but no info entered her seem to be shaken head.

“Do not worry. You aren’t dead.”

“Thank God…”

“But… you aren’t alive either.”

“What?! Impossible! If I am not alive, then why do I still feel the pain from the accident?”

“You feel yourself. You’re still connected to your body. You can see me. But I am the only one who can see you, no more else. Oh, also those who are like you.”

Sungjong listened, but no words seem clear to her. She felt that every words rumbled in her head, just like she is suffering from dyslexia, but she was not.

“You weren’t supposed to die yet. But this accident occurred, getting the life out of your mortal body. If you were in your body right now, you’ll be covered with cuts and bruises and you won’t be able to talk to me right now.”

“So if that’s the case, I’m really dead! But how can that be?”

“No you are not. You don’t believe me? Seriously, what’s wrong with souls like you? If you don’t believe it, then believe whatever you want, but that won’t change a single thing.”

“No… who are you anyways.”

“I have no true name actually. Just call me, the deliverer. But I am neither good nor bad. I’m both. I was stuck here on this earth, given the task of getting the spirits and deliver them towards the sky, or to the deeps of the underworld. As long as I do the deed, I live.”

“But… you are not death?”                                          

“Of course I am not?! How could you compare this face with that strange man? I’m not even sure myself if what’s that thing’s gender. I know you have not met him. Remember this, he gets those who die on their end, and I just deliver. And also, I’ve got wings, look.”

Two black huge wings came out from the back of the man who is now in a standing position. Sungjong felt dumbfounded, mesmerized. But, one thing bothered him.

“Why do you have… black wings? Aren’t they supposed to be white?”

“White wings are for angels. Those with shining halos. I am not one of them. Have you forgotten what I said? I am not good to be accepted up there, nor bad to be accepted down there. That’s what they said to me.”

“Who?”

“No need to know anymore. “

#

Days passed. Nothing new. Nothing, to look forward, especially with an emotion you feel while you are in the situation without assurance of solidity and future.

“Just stay here. I have more works to do. Other souls are waiting for the deliverer.”

“Um… take care.”

His both brows rose with perplexed look. It has been many times since he explained who he was, but the girl with him acts as if he is a normal human with no distinction.

It might be irritating for others who may perhaps be in his place, but for him, he honestly finds it amusing.

“Hey, have you heard me clear, take care okay?”

“You really haven’t digested it totally. I am, the deliverer, not a human like you before you ended up with me here. I do not feel pain. I am not endangered. I -”

“But you still have a heart, and that’s called emotional frailty. I think, it is not impossible you might experience one, any time soon. I actually heard it beating two days ago when I asked you and approached you after refusing to answer me right?”

“That is totally hilarious. I gotta go. Behave while I’m away.”

“Yes sir Fraven!”

The image of Sungjong, standing in front of him with her right hand saluting him, is really quite a show to him. It is the first time he mingled longer than usual with a spirit. And the first one is truly different.

His wings were already out from their veiled posts in his back, but he is not flapping it yet. They remained still on his back.

In his eyes is a glint of delight.

“What did you just call me?”

“Sir Fraven. Why? Oh, okay, I’m sorry then. I won’t call you names anym-”

“No, I actually liked it. But, why that?”

“It is short for, ‘from heaven.’ Liked it? Honestly, it suits you. I really do believe it go well with you.”

“Why do you say so? I’m a fallen angel. I had committed mistake that made me kept out up there. I am not-”

“Everyone commit mistakes, even me! You are once a man like me, and that is not inevitable. It still sounds good for you, because you are from heaven, literally.”

The deliverer just smirked with what he heard. Sungjong was right, it truly suits him. He literally came from heaven. He did not only came from up above, he fell from it.

“And because you are good.”

The last words seem to strike him. He is not sure at all if he was doing well, or if it was the other way. It was the first time someone commenced him because he had done something good, as how Sungjong see it.

He did not care to answer, for he doesn’t know what will slip out from his mouth either. He just flew swiftly out the crystal window, promptly waned from the smiling girl’s sight.

In her heart, even though she knows she was miles and miles away from their house on earth, she truthfully felt she was home.

It’s as if, she is now safe and sound.

“Hey wait! Look, over there! See? It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“You’re right…it is really beautiful.”

While he is gazing at the rainbow rounded with mist, Sungjong steals some looks from him. She was amused to see the amazement in his eyes, as if it is his first time to see something this astonishing.

“I do not know if I’ll laugh or be bewildered, but may I ask? Is this your first time to see a rainbow?”

“No.”

“Then why-”

“But it’s my first time to stop, and be amazed at this wonder from Him for a few seconds,” and he looked back at Sungjong who was also looking at him, thus, they ended up looking at each other’s eyes.

After a few seconds, they both turned their heads back to look at the rainbow starting to die away. She felt shy, for the first time during her spirit life. In her mind, she is shouting repeatedly, I do not have a crush on this guy!

“That’s what you get for being too busy… hahaha!” she laughed nervously, trying to break down the profound atmosphere.

“Maybe. Or maybe, I just don’t want to be attached in this earth, or else I’ll gonna miss all this beauty.”

“Huh? Why? You’ll change work?”

“No… I mean I am not sure. There is no permanent here… I may have worked for decades in this job, but I may just be surprised one time… I’ll have to forget about this. Just like when angels enter heaven. It’s like, brainwashing.”

“Oh… so it’s like when you become an angel, you get amnesia! Interesting. But I’ll give you an advice, if it’s okay with you.”

“Go on. You started talking, you end it.”

Sungjong raised an eyebrow in disbelief, before continuing.

“Okay, okay. I got it. I just want to tell you that…”

Silence. Even a pin drop can be heard, if there was at the moment.

“…if you have the chance to enjoy what you have and what’s around you, give time to it and be happy that you have it. That’s all!”

“I guess, it will not last forever, like what’s with us. You need to return. It is time. And by the way, I lied. My name’s Myungsoo.”

One word and Sungjong woke up panting like no other.

She’s totally back.

#

She misses those days her family was as solid as the bricks of stones on their house, that stood the test of time but remain as intact like years before.

If only those days could return again.

Sungjong knows, both her parents still love each other, it’s just that, anger took in-charge of them for a while. Her father might do all things to fix the crooked part of the picture, but the crease still remains.

The midnight seems darker, despite of all the glistening stars that are visible. Beside a large telescope, Sungjong is sitting on the still damp grasses due to the morning dew. Staring at the sky, she can’t help herself from crying and reminiscing the time she had with Myungsoo beside her.

Though, there is nothing she can do but accept the fact that the life destined for her is on earth, while that of the man she is thinking about is in the middle of death and life.

She closed her eyes, and started letting her emotions spill out.

This is all Sungjong can do to heal her heartbreak.

“I want to speak right at this moment, and I know you are listening to me… you are beside me.

It seems to me, everything I underwent just happened yesterday. We we’re happy with each other’s company. We do not think about what might happen the next day, or in every sunrise.

All we know was, we we’re contented to be together, and that’s the only important feeling while we’re living in one world, no one could interfere. 

But it’s true; to dream of a happy ending is one of the impossibilities in the life of the living. Truly, impossible.

You will meet someone. You will fall for that special one. You’ll believe. You’ll trust. But, in the end, you’ll still cry. Maybe, this is my fate, I cannot run away from.

The last words from yours still resonate inside my head.

When you told me, that you are happy that you met someone like me…

…that you’ll miss me by your side…

…that even we’ll go on with the path we are destined to take, you don’t have anything you’ll regret from…

…that you will stand as my guardian…

But I guess, I just need to accept the fact that we cannot live together in this lifetime.

When I reached the time that I am the one scheduled to meet death, I’ll gladly accept it.

Why?

Because I know that’s the time I’ll have the chance to let you hold my hand once again.

There is so much more I want to tell you, and I know letting the wind hear and carry my message towards you, is not adequate. What I know is, three words might take over the insufficiency.

I love you.”

Fraven, or Myungsoo; the deliverer, or the fallen angel, his impact on her life will remain to touch her until her last breath.

As she let herself fall into bed, she felt the flowing of the wind, making her black hair go with its stream.

And she went into a deep sleep, thinking he was beside her.

“Do not lose that sweet smile… I’ll always be here.”

Feathers as dark as the midnight sky filled her white bed.

*I'm excited for the MAMA awards and other year-end award shows and the performances, it still saddens me that 2ne1 wouldn't be on the stage again. I miss my queens. Let's express our love for our idols and respect all the other fandoms. I'm in many fandoms, being a blackjack, inner circle, say a, inspirit, angel, baby, vip, melody, shawol, and many more, so I know the feeling of seeing fanwars. And it only hurts our idols and us, no one's a winner after all.

*Let's just enjoy the music and support the artists. Thumbs up if you agree. d(^_^)

#myungjong.forever