Chapter 50

"Yuri." Eunchae whispered, as she open the door but there was no answer. This was the 5th cabin she had come upon. The first three cabin had been locked, the second one had been occupied by a family who told her they didn't know any Yuri. Eunchae was about to give up when she spotted this 5th cabin. Something about it had drawn her there. Eunchae had been surprised to find the cabin not locked and there was a fire still burining in the fireplace. Eunchae didn't have to search the cabin because she could feel Yuri's presence in this cabin. Yuri had been here but now she wasn't so where could she have gone? Eunchae didn't want to go out and search for her, afraid that she would miss Yuri when she returned so Eunchae made herself comfortable on the mini sofa in front of the fire. She would wait for Yuri. She didn't want to go outside when it was much more comfortable inside. She just hope that Yuri would return soon. She wanted to get this over and done with fast. She had a husband to go home too, and she didn't want to be away any longer then necessary, "Damnit Yuri! Why couldn't you just leave like you said you would, then I wouldn't have anything to worry about?!" Eunchae shouted in furstration.

"Yuri, what are you doing here?" Yunho asked, surprised. Yuri pushed away from Yunho and scrambled to her feet. She didn't know what to say to Yunho. She had tried to run from him but he had found her. Now, what was she to say to him? This wasn't supposed to happen. If only she had fought the urge to see him. She had been trying to fight her emotions but today, when she was strolling in the forest, she had seen them, the pinic. Oh, how she wished she was there to join them. She had rented one of the cabin and had been hiding in it since she and Eunchae had switch places. She should have left this place. Should have left Seoul but she had nowhere to go and the feeling of being so far away from Yunho was so painful she just couldn't do it. She had thought that if she stay and be careful then there wouldn't be any problems but now, there was a problem. Yunho had found her. Damn, she shouldn't have given into her urges!

These past few days were so horrible that she couldn't sleep properly. Just closing her eyes would bring images of Yunho to her mind. She tried to fight her emotions but it was so damn hard! So, every night, she would hide behind the big canopy tree that grew in front of Yunho's cabin, hoping to catch a glimpsed of Yunho and when she saw him, she had to fight the urge to run to him and hug him. She had been hiding in the forest this afternoon. She had thought it was safe until Taeyeon and Changmin had appear but luckily, they hadn't seen her hidding behind the bushes. She had seen Taeyeon and Changmin kissing and it made her miss Yunho so much. She had gone back to the cabin and had cried in front of the fire for the rest of the evening. When she was through crying, the urge to see Yunho was so strong she had to see him. She had only wanted to see him, just one glimpsed and then she would leave but when she saw him outside, she couldn't leave. She thought she was safe behind the tree, that he wouldn't see her but when she felt something crawling up her legs, a lizard, afraid, she had tried to shake the lizard off and didn't realise that her movement had causes the high grass to shake with her and when she realize it was too late, she heard Yunho's voice and then he had started towards her, causing her to retreat back into the forest.

Yuri had reach the stream and was panicking. She didn't know where to run. She had to find a place to hide. That was when she notice a big tree trunk lying on the ground and quickly ran behind it, hoping it would conceal her. Yuri had to hold her breath when she heard Yunho approach. She slowly raised her head to peek at him to see him looking around and when he turn towards her direction she had quickly lowered her head. She could hear the pounding of her heart. It was so loud she thought Yunho would hear it, too. Wanting to be as far away from Yunho as possible, Yuri had slowly tried to crawl away from her hidding place but her knee had landed on a branch and had causes it to snap. Yuri was so afraid she held her breath and prayed that Yunho hadn't heard the branch snap. When she didn't hear any movement beyond the tree trunk, she slowly lifted her head to see, only Yunho had suddenly jump over the trunk and landed right in front of her face. Yuri was taken by surprised that she didn't have time to run or think. She was paralyzed by surprised and Yunho was just as surprised as she was.

"Yuri, what are you doing out here? Hang on. What were you doing behind the tree? And how the hell did you leave the house without me seeing?" Yunho asked, confused "I climb out of the window." Yuri replied, the only thing she could come up with, "You what?!" Yunho cried, shock and surprised, "I climb out of the window. Yunho Oppa, don't be upset. I needed some fresh air and wanted to have some time alone to think. I knew you wouldn't allow me to wonder off alone in the forest by myself so I decided to climb through the window." Yuri said, still not turning to face him, afraid to look at him, afraid that she wouldn't be able to restrain herself from holding him, "You climb out of the window?! I can't believe this! Do you know how dangerous that was?! No, I guess you didn't think of that! I don't understand you anymore Yuri! How could you do something that stupid?! What if you fell?! What if you hurtled yourself?!" Yunho cried, clenching his hands into a fist, "Oppa, your overreacting. The window wasn't that far from the ground so I wouldn't have hurtled myself." Yuri said, hearing the anger and concern in Yunho's voice.

"It doens't matter if the window wasn't high up! What could you have been thinking, climbing through the window and entering the forest all alone and at this hour?! Do you know how dangerous the forest is, especially this dark?! You could have trip, fallen! Someone or some anmial could have attacked you! Yuri! God, how could you do something this foolish?! Did you not think of how I would feel if I found you gone and not know where you are?! For Chist sake, Yuri, just thinking about you lying injured hopelessy on the ground and not being there to help you, its...its frightening!" Yunho cried, with pain. Yuri bit her bottom lips as tears filled her eyes. She could feel the pain in Yunho's voice and she wanted to run to him and hold him, to tell him how much she loved him but she forced herself not, too. She couldn't allow herself to give into her emotions. She had to think for him. She had to be strong. She had manage this far so she had to continue. She couldn'/t turn back on the choice she had chosen.

Yuri felt the pain and anger rised inside her heart. She wanted to be with this man, to love and protect him, to bring him happiness but it wasn't possible. Her health was preventing her from doing what she so much wanted. It had forced her away from the man she love, forced her to do the unthinkable, forced her to step aside and let another women share her husbands bed. Even if that women was her sister. It was still too painful to accept but she couldn't complain. After all, this was the only way to protect Yunho. The only thing she knew would save him from suffering but it hurts like hell and if she had to suffer and go through hell just to bring happiness to the one she love then so be it! She rather be the one suffering then to see Yunho suffer.

"Yuri, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scream at you but what you did was foolish. I love you and don't want anything to happen to you. I just want you to be safe. You do understand, don't you?" Yunho asked, as he pulled her into his arms. Yuri lean against Yunho and closed her eyes. Oh, how she missed his touch. Its been so long. She wanted to stay in his embrace but Eunchae's face appeared before her, forcing her to remember the choice she had made. Yuri could feel anger and pain she had been bottling up for the past few days squeezing at her heart. Unable to control her emotions no longer, it exploaded, "Oppa, you can't protect me forever! You can't watch over me twenty-four seven! You know with my condition that I would eventually die! What does it matter if I fall and break my neck?! Either way, I'm going to die! Today! Tomorrow! So what?! Death is knocking at my door and we both know we can't stop it! I'm so damn tired of this waiting! I'm so damn tired of going to bed and thinking if I had still be here tomorrow! I'm so tired Oppa! I don't want to go through each day like this! I'm not afraid of death! I'm afraid of what my death will do to you! I'm afraid that you won't be able to survive, afraid because I know how much it will kill you when I die! I don't want to see you in pain! I don't want to leave you with those pains! I just wish that you didn't love me so much!" Yuri cried, pulling away from Yunho.

"Yuri, please don't say those words?! I love you and I want to protect you! I know that your health is unpredictable but you can't give up! If you give up, it would be like giving up on us! You would be giving away our hopes! I can't bear it if something or anything happens to you! I just want to be with you, to fight this fight with you so don't push me away! Don't hold back on me! All I'm asking from you is that you let me fight with you, to be with you for as long as possible! A day, a minute! As long as we are together! Please don't take this away from me?! Its the only thing I ask of you! I just want to love and protect you til death do us part! Did you not say those words?! How can you forget those vows we spoke of?! A day and a life as long as I'm with you, nothing else matters!" Yunho cried, pulling Yuri back into his arms.

Yuri hadn't wanted to say those harsh words but she had been unable to control her emotions and it was too late to pull back what she had spoken. Hope? There was no hope. It was useless now. Their battle had failed. They had been defeated. Fighting was pointless now so no use in holding on. It was time to accept the truth but she couldn't tell him the truth because she knew that it would shatter him. Yuri wished that he didn't love her that deeply. If he didn't love her that much, it would make things much easier. Much easier for the both of them. In a couple of days, she would leave this world and he wouldn't know it. She prayed that he would never find out the truth, 'Please god?! Spare him the heartache! Let me suffer for him!' Yuri cried silently to herself.

"Oppa, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me?" Yuri cried into his chest, "Yuri, just promise me you won't do anything this foolish again. No more climbing through windows. If you want to be alone to think, all you have to do is tell me and I will give you the space you need but you have to tell me where you are so that I know your safe." Yunho said, her hair. Yuri took in a deep breath. Yunho didn't realize that she was apologizing for what she was about to do. What she had already done. If he knew, he would be devasted but she knew he would never know. It pained her but it was for the best, "Come on, let's go back before the steaks burn. That's if their not already burnt." Yunho said, holding her hands. Yuri bit her bottom lips. She couldn't go back with him, "Oppa, I want to stay here for a while. Please, I want to be alone for a moment to clear my mind." Yunho hesitated. He didn't want to leave her out here alone but he had promised to give her space when she asked for it, "Okay but don't take too long. If you don't come back in eighty minutes I will come for you." Yunho said, smiling at her. He hug her and kissed her on the forehead. Letting go, he slowly moved away from her. Yuri watch him as he walked away from her, "I love you Oppa!" Yuri cried out, after him. Yunho stopped and turn back to face her, "I love you too, Yuri! Eighty minutes and if I don't see you by then, I will come for you! Don't take too long Yuri, because I will miss you! I'm already missing you!" Yunho cried back, and blew her a kiss and then turn to leave, "Goodbye Oppa. I will miss you, too." Yuri whispered, to his back.