“Have we met?” Kyuhyun’s eyes are full of wonder, and Jongwoon has to look away.

“No,” he says, after missing a beat or two, because another one would cause Kyuhyun confusion, and then unwanted suspicion and Jongwoon couldn’t have that. He smiles a little and shakes his head, “I don’t think so.”

“Me name’s Cho Kyuhyun,” Kyuhyun introduces himself, offering his hand to Jongwoon.

“Kim Jongwoon,” Jongwoon answers, taking Kyuhyun’s hand.

“Nice to meet you, Jongwoon-ssi.”

“Nice to meet you, too…” Jongwoon answers, and maybe, if Kyuhyun looked long enough, he’ll see that beautiful smile falter as Jongwoon knew he has to live like this forever. He promised his sister and he didn’t want his parents to hurt Kyuhyun. “… Kyuhyun-ssi.”

“Forever, huh,” Jongwoon mutters, opening the door to their mansion and for what feels like already a thousand years, he doesn’t feel afraid. He doesn’t feel threatened and he doesn’t feel like he needs to explain what he’s done for the day. He opens the door to their house, not because that’s the place he wants to be, but because that’s the only place he can be at that time.

He can still see everyone’s eyes and he can still feel their judgment burn on his skin.

Surprisingly, it doesn’t kill him as much as Kyuhyun’s do.

He closes his tired eyes for a moment and doesn’t even feel surprised when his parents came out of nowhere when he opened his eyes. Sometimes, he wonders if his parents could may be a witch and a wizard, though of course, if they are, they should have found Kyuhyun before now.

Jongwoon is tired.

“Jongwoon,” Mr. Kim starts.

“I’m tired,” Jongwoon interrupts his father, and he knows it might be disrespectful but he is really, really tired. The last thing he wants to do is talk to anybody and explain, and the only thing he wishes to do at that moment is to sleep, hoping that when he is sleeping, everything will disappear even only for a while. Everything will be okay even only for a few hours.

“Jongwoon, listen,” his father doesn’t give up easily.

Jongwoon pauses at the staircase but doesn’t face his father.

“You’re mother’s condition… It’s getting worst,” Jongwoon can hear the sadness in his father’s voice, the longing and the pain, but for how long is he supposed to hear every damn person’s agony? How long is he supposed to accept everything? He loves his father, Jongwoon can say that and he can prove that, but sometimes, it’s just too much.

Sometimes, he wants to give up.

But then, he’ll remember his sister’s face and he’ll be reminded that all his sister’s life, pain is the only thing that reminded Hyesung she was alive.

“What do you want me to do?”

It’s not an ultimatum, but a question.

“Can you…” For the first time ever since this all began, there’s a dilemma in his father’s tone, a questioning of his own logic whether what he is asking his son, his only child alive, is right or wrong. “Can you be Hyesung, even only this once? I’m begging you, Jongwoon… Not for me, for your mother!”

Jongwoon can feel his heart clenched, whether physically or not, he doesn’t know anymore.

“What about me, Dad?!” Jongwoon faces his father again and sees tears in his father’s eyes, oblivious of the tears on his own eyes. “What about me?! What am I supposed to do? My own condition’s getting worst, too, and you know what, Dad? I don’t know when I’ll be able to take this, all of this, any longer! I don’t know when I’ll suddenly snap and stop and lose everything that made me hold on to this life, supposedly my life, and just fade!”

“I love Mom…” Jongwoon falls down to his knees, his body giving up on him. “I love her, Dad, and I love you, too… I love Hyesung-noona and I love Kyuhyun… But why do I always end up getting hurt? Why do I always end up giving everything, my all… and then being left all alone?”

“It’s tiring, Dad,” Jongwoon cries painfully, covering his face and willing the tears to stop. “It’s so tiring and I really don’t know what to do anymore… I don’t… I don’t know what to do anymore. I know you love Hyesung-noona so much. I know that, Dad. And it’s okay. It’s really okay, but Hyesung-noona is gone… She is gone… Hyesung-noona is gone…”

“I’m here…”

A choke, a lonely sob, and it’s almost unheard.

The silence besides Jongwoon’s painful sobs swallowing the mansion like a gigantic black hole is deafening, excruciating and full of anguish, and nothing can be heard until just like a magical entity, his mother appeared beside him, and with eyes filled with yearning and love, she pulled Jongwoon in her arms.

Jongwoon’s eyes widened and he looked up to look at her mother’s face. He isn’t dressed as Hyesung and he is pretty sure that this conversation started because his father told him that his mother’s condition is getting worst, so why?

His mother smiled at him, endearingly, and there are also tears in her eyes and she kissed Jongwoon’s forehead and whispered to him, “My son, what happened?”

That’s the first time…

And Jongwoon can’t hold it any longer, can’t pretend that everything’s fine any longer, can’t take it any longer as he let himself be held by his mother tightly, as he let himself succumb to his parents’ arms. He cries like a little child, the little boy he was never given the chance to be, and he tries to let go of all the pain and heartaches his impaired heart is dealing with.

“She’s recovering,” the psychologist tells Jongwoon and his father. “She’s recovering faster and faster every second in the last few hours than she did for the last three years. I don’t know the exact reason, probably something medicine can’t explain, but she recognizes you, now, Jongwoon.”

“What about Hyesung? Does she know Hyesung is gone?”

“Yes,” she tells Mr. Kim, “and she’s dealing with it slowly. She’s learning to accept the thing that brought her in this state three years ago, because of Jongwoon. She knows Jongwoon needs him.”

“Did she,” Jongwoon hesitates, “Did my mother tell you that?”

“She did,” the psychologist smiles at Jongwoon. “She loves you. She’s been trying so hard to recognize you as her son, to remember every detail that she forgot about you.”

A/N:

A hint of what could have happened to Kyuhyun...

What happened to Kyuhyun?