On Dec. 31st, eomma sent a car to pick me up. I only had couple of days left, and as much as I wanted to spend my last days with my ex-husband-current-boyfriend, since he was busy with the schedules, I decided to go home and stay there before leaving back to US. Plus, appa promised to buy me a new house and a car, so staying home for four days before leaving wasn't a bad bargain for a house and a car.

            I think what shocked my parents the most was my appearance every morning at the breakfast table. I guess they weren't used to seeing me eat in the morning. It was a habit I picked up from Himchan. Though at first I only prepared his meals and got ready to go to work, after couple of months, I found myself sitting facing him, eating breakfast together. And now, morning coffee and breakfast was a must-have for me.

            When being at home, I tried to avoid every arguable topic with appa as much as I could. Therefore, we never had a conversation... simply because we didn't know what to talk about. There were very awkward 'hi's around the house when we ran into each other, and other than that, things were very quiet between Appa and me.

            Thursday was my last day of work under Alex oppa. I knew he was happy when he found out that Himchan and I divorced, but knowing that we were still together threw him off. He avoided me when he found out about us, and finally talked to me on the last day of work.

"What time are you leaving on Saturday?" he asked and I told him the time. "Who's gonna take you to the airport?"

"Do-young is. Why?"

"No reason. I thought," he moved closer and whispered, "Himchan would"

"No..." I said, letting out a sigh. Yeah, it would have been great if I had the chance to see him one last time before leaving Korea, but we both knew how busy he was.

"What about your parents?"

"I've been living with them ever since the 31st. I bet Appa's busy but I don't know what eomma will do."

"You want to see him, don't you?" he asked reading my tone, and I nodded. "Wish, there were so many times I wanted you to think of me the way you're thinking of him right now. You have no idea how happy I was when I first saw you six months ago... And how furious I was after I found out that you're married - not to just anyone, but to one of the hottest idols. I knew I couldn't compete with that. And for the second time, I backed away without even trying..." said Alex oppa and I looked at him. "What I'm trying to say is..." he sighed, not knowing what exactly to say. "Don't try to hold yourself back when you know what you want. Go for it. Hold on to it. The world might hate you, but if it makes you happy, don't think of others.