What followed that day was a series of fallen tears and desperate pleas.

It had been so hard for Suzy to accept the truth but she knew so well that her countless tears and endless crying won't change Ji Eun's fate. Soo Ri went to her room to ease her suffocated heart, because she wanted to act in front of them bravely, although behind her facade, was a pained heart of a mother. She already considered Ji Eun as her very own daughter and knowing that she'll leave in a few days breaks her heart so much.

After a long while, Suzy and Ji Eun finally emptied their sad soul through their tears. Their tears stopped, but their sadness became worse.

"I'm sorry, Suzy." Ji Eun brushed the girl's hair when tears fell from her eyes again.

"It's okay. That's your fate, Ji Eun. We cannot do anything about it."

"I know...and it hurts."

"Why would it be so complicated..." Suzy muttered. "I mean, you going away for good is painful but forgetting you completely? That's...that's preposterous..."

Ji eun pursed her lips as she tried to organize what the younger one had just said. Yes, she admitted to herself that she's afraid of what might happen. "I know...I didn't have an idea that leaving this world is so complicated."

Suzy was staring at the vast ceiling of their room. It was plain and dull. And Suzy tried to imagine that after three days, her memories about Ji Eun will be just like that. Empty. 

The girl then sat up on her bed and averted her gaze to Ji Eun who was looking down, obvious that she's having a hard time processing her emotions.

"I don't want to forget you, Ji Eun." Suzy mumbled as tears flowed from her eyes once again. "I don't want to..."

"Oh Suzy," Ji Eun felt her lips tremble as they both embraced each other.

Suzy hugged her so tight, wishing that the strength in her arms will be enough to not let Ji Eun slip away. But deep within her heart, she knew that it wasn't and will never be enough.

~:~

Luhan sat on his bed as he idly plucked the strings of his guitar. Although the lights weren't , slivers of sunlight peeked through the wide picture window, kissing his room's carpeted floor.

Then, his phone rang. It was his mom.

"Hey mom," the boy greeted.

"Sweetie?"

"Yes?"

"We just arrived here at the airport."

"Great! Do you want me to pick you guys up?"

"No need," she replied with her gentle voice. "Have you already prepared your passport?"

Luhan nodded although he was just talking with her through the phone. "Yeah,"

"Alright," she answered. "I already talked to our relatives in California. They're excited to see you!"

Hearing the excitement in her tone, Luhan unkowingly smiled. "Me too, mom. When we'll be leaving?"

"Tomorrow,"

Luhan nodded. He's used to the fact that they only spend limited time at home because of business. Athough it sometimes saddens Luhan, he chose to honor his parents. Little did he know that Mr. and Mrs. Xi were very proud of him. 

A week ago, they told him that they will spend a vacation for one month in California to catch up with his cousins that he hasn't seen for a year which greatly favored Luhan since he missed them so much because of the fact that he spent most of his childhood with them.

"Alright," he replied, "see you later."

"Bye, sweetie. I love you."

"Love you too, mom."

After ending the call, Luhan laid himself on his bed and stared at the vast ceiling with longing in his eyes. He then scanned his phone and studied his picture with Ji Eun. It had been days since he last saw her and Luhan can't deny the fact that his heart is becoming more hollow as the silence between the both of them grew. He desperately wanted to make everything right, of course. Yet every time he tries to talk to her, Ji Eun runs away before he could even approach her. And now, it's Spring Break and Luhan doesn't even have an idea how he will be able to fix the burned bridge between them, not to mention the fact that he'll be away for a month.

As he let himself get lost in the ocean of his anxious thoughts, one of the maids knocked on his door.

"Yeah?" He opened.

"Sir, there's someone looking for you outside."

"Oh," he frowned, "who?"

"She said she's Lee Ji Eun."

Hearing the maid's answer, Luhan scrunched his brow. "W--wait, what? Did I hear that right? Lee Ji Eun?"

"Yes sir," she nodded, "Lee Ji Eun."

After confirming her reply, Luhan didn't take a minute to take that in and quickly dashed downstairs as he felt a sudden rush of blood in his veins.

"Where's she?"

"Your visitor's outside, sir." One of the maids, who was wiping the window, informed.

"Alright,"

After running towards the door, Luhan suddenly stopped upon his tracks and took a deep breath. He doesn't have any idea what to say but he didn't care. All he wanted to do that time was to see Ji Eun once again; and her eyes that glimmered with joy.

Mustering some courage, Luhan walked straight towards the gate and felt the wild beat of his heart when he finally saw her, standing in front of the gate in a modest floral dress. Oh how he missed this kind of view.

Sensing his presence, Ji Eun met his eyes, noticing how the look in his eyes was mixture of sadness and hope at the same time. Although the pain was still vivid, Ji Eun tried to plaster a smile.

"Hey," he greeted. Nervousness was evident in his tone.

"Luhan," she replied along with a nod.

He felt his heart softened after hearing once again his name from her own voice.

"W--what brought you here?" He stuttered, trying to find the right words to say. "Would you like to go inside?"

"No no," She vehemently shook her head. "This will be just quick."

"Oh..." Luhan mumbled as disappointment flooded his eyes. "How did you get here?"

"Suzy knows your address." She replied. "I'm with my aunt."

Luhan nodded and saw a parked car that has a few distance away from them. 

Silence followed afterward because neither of them doesn't know what to say. Luhan tried to rummage through his mind to think of proper words to say while Ji Eun fumbled in translating her thoughts into words. She doesn't have any idea how she would be able to explain everything to him.

"So uh..." He cleared his throat. "How are you?"

"I'm doing great." She replied and pursed her lips.

Frustrated at the awkwardness that engulfed the both of them, Luhan sighed. "Look, Ji Eun. I--I'm sorry...for everything...for what happened...I'm so sor--"

"Luhan, it's alright." She smiled which flustered the boy. "I forgive you."

Although he heard the assurance in her voice, Luhan felt even worse.

"Yeah, I can't deny the fact that what you did hurt me." She explained. "I wanted to be mad--no, I wanted to be angry at you."

Luhan looked down as he felt shame flooded his very being.

"But I realized," she continued, "being angry at you forever won't get me nowhere. It'll actually poison me if I let it be rooted in my heart you know...so yeah, don't worry. It's alright."

Ji Eun chuckled at her statement although her eyes brimmed with tears. "Actually I'm here to thank you also."

"Thank me? Why?"

"For being a part of my journey," she smiled, "you taught me a lot, really."

Luhan gave her a questioning look yet decided to not push her any further although curiosity filled him up.

"I'm going away, you see." 

"Away? Where?"

Ji Eun sighed. "It's hard to explain, Luhan."

Just before Luhan could formulate his question, she reached for his hand and put something on his palm. He then took a deep breath after realizing that it was the flower clip that he had given her for her birthday.

"Why are you giving this back to me, Ji Eun?"

"I don't know..." she mumbled. "Maybe because I don't want to cling on memories once I go away."

Ji Eun saw the hurt in his eyes after releasing her statement.

Luhan looked up, trying to fight his tears. "And here I am hoping that we could start over again..."

"I'm sorry, Luhan but--"

"Look, I love you, Ji Eun. I mean it." He said as his vision started to become blurry. "Yes, I've been a fool. But I want you to know that what I've said to you, is true."

"I know." She smiled. "I could see it in your eyes."

Hearing her reply, Luhan pursed his lips at the sight of sincerity written on her curled lips. 

"But Luhan...we cannot start over." She mumbled. "And to be honest, even if I don't go, I won't choose to start over."

And that what triggered his tears to fall from his eyes.

"Look," she explained, "this heart of mine still have a lot to learn..."

Seeing the hurt in his eyes, Ji Eun took a deep breath and wrapped her arms around him. Although she could still feel the pain, Ji Eun knew that Luhan will always have a room in her heart. For he was the boy she first fancied.

Neither of them knew how long it took them to embrace and when they finally let go, Luhan tried to smile despite the pain. 

"Keep this, please." He pleaded as he gave back the flower clip. "It's a gift. And gifts aren't meant to be taken back to its giver."

Although Ji Eun wanted to protest, she knew that he has a point so just as he said, she kept it.

"Well, I have to go..." She said. "Thank you for everything, Luhan, really. I uh...I hope you'll have a wonderful journey ahead."

"Why do you say goodbye as if we're not gonna see each other anymore..." Luhan tried to chuckle despite his crumbling heart.

*Yes* Ji Eun thought. *That's true*

Then, without further ado, Ji Eun smiled for the last time and walked away. She knew how painful it was for Luhan yet she told herself to not worry...becase when she finally leaves this world, memories about her will be erased in his mind.

~:~

That night, Ji Eun went to the terrace to have a time for herself. The sky that was once painted with puffs of clouds was now conquered by a vast cape of black complimented with stars that looked like twinkling little coins from afar. 

She was checking her phone's gallery. Most of them were pictures of her along with Soo Ri, Suzy, and Chanyeol.

Seeing how Chanyeol rarely smiles at all, Ji Eun chuckled, remembering every time she spent with her including the moments when they both argued and pissed each other off. Although it wasn't a something good to keep as a memory, Ji Eun chose to cherish it. Because slowly, as time passed, Ji Eun considered that no matter how good or bad the day was, she'll cherish it, because what mattered to her was the fact that she faced that day with Chanyeol.

Then, Ji Eun sighed as she remembered what's happening lately. Chanyeol rarely talked to her anymore. At first, she was okay with that yet as time passed by, she noticed that something was off. He acted so differently towards her now. It's as if there wasn't a string of bond between them. The way he pushes her away felt as if there weren't any strings of attachment that existed between the two of them. And Ji Eun admits that it hurts her to see him that way. Because of all the people that she wanted to be okay with before she go, was Chanyeol. 

She had become so fond of him that Ji Eun doesn't have any idea how she will be able to face each day without his presence beside her. Just the thought of it made Ji Eun sick.

The more she reminisced, the more she realized that she misses Chanyeol so she dialled his number with hopes that he will answer it although he hasn't picked up any of her calls these past few days.

It rang for a while and Ji Eun waited, hopeful. Yet no one answered.

She called a lot of times, yet not one call of hers was answered.

And Ji Eun felt a new pain in her heart as she realized that there's no possibity that Chanyeol will answer her call. 

Greetings!
I'm so sorry it's been a while. *cries* But I'm back now...and I'll try to update as soon as I can since this story is about to be completed anyway... *coughs* 
Thank you, readers, really. It amazed me that there are still a lot of you who are willing to wait for this story to be finished.
Also, I made a new story by the way. Chanyeol's the lead. (As always...hehe.)
I hope you guys check it out! It'll be just a short story. :) 
Again, thank you so much and have a blessed day!

Heretofore (A Chanyeol Fanfic) by FindingSunshine

love,

FindingSunshine