Hyorin's POV

I am really nervous..I have contacted my mom's brother here. Yes, I am sure he knows where my mom is. She has never contacted me in years until I found my uncle address here. He lives in Haarlem, one of the largest city in the Netherlands. I called him early in the morning, he was surprised when he heard that I came here to find my mother. The last time I contacted him was 2 years ago. That was when I really wanted to listen to my mother's voice but my uncle said he was not in Holland at that time. 

I told Jonghyun about everything when we were on the aeroplane. Last night was really something between me and Jonghyun. Right? What was I thinking when I hugged him?

He is taking shower now. Everyhthing has become so awkward. We have been acting awkwardly since we woke up this morning. I remember how our position looked like when we woke up this morning. I am sitting on the sofa in our hotel room while waiting for him. I think I have become slightly comfortable to live with Jonghyun. We look like brother and sister, I guess.

"hmm" Jonghyun cleared his throat while he was walking out of toilet.

"Hyorin" he called me.

"Yeah?" I looked at him who is wearing nothing but a towel.

"Last night..." he stops..

"Last night, waeyo?" I asked.

"I..I am sorry If I did something that was not supposed to be done" I am getting confused now.

"huh? you did something?" 

"Well..you know, we, you..I mean I am sorry about last night, I was drunk" then he grabs his clothes and went back to the loo.

Okay..I started to think about something that he was not supposed to do last night..he hugged me and that's it, right..Ah whatever...I don't wanna make things complicated now. 

Jonghyun's POV

We just arrived at Haarlem where her uncle lives. I hope she is ready to meet her mom. Thank god our driver knows the road so well. He even suggested some places we should visit before we go back to amsterdam.

We are heading to her uncle's house now. Her uncle said he will tell Hyorin everything when we come to his house today. He has not told Hyorin where her mother is. Could it be....

Andwae, her mom couldn't be dead...Hyorin said she got a letter from her mom, three years ago. It is so fishy.....

When we came to his house, we found her uncle and his family standing outside their house to welcome us. They have such a lovely family. So her uncle named uncle Gerard has two little daughter and one beautiful wife. Is this their first time to meet Hyorin?

"I never know I have such a beautiful grown up niece...I hope you don't mind with our little house, Hyorin"

"No..no..Uncle, I am really happy I finally could meet you here" they are speaking in english..then Uncle Gerard stares at me.

"Oh..this is Kim Jonghyun, my friend who accompanies me during my stay here" WHAT?! a friend...? I thought she wanted to introduce me to her uncle as her boyfriend..? Damnit I have to introduce myself, don't I?

"Hello sir, I am Hyorin's friend" I smiled and we are all walking to his living room.

he has a small homey libing room. it's really comfortable with 2 brown sofa and I saw some classic paintings. I am sure he has a great taste of art.

"Hmmm..Hyorin..I think what I wanted to tell you now is really important for you. I know Your father and your mom were separated long time ago...I was really angry when I heard my only sister was dumped by an Asian guy...but then She went back here, to my house, crying and thing's changed after" Uncle Gerard started a serious conversation with her. I am sitting next to Hyorin on the sofa in front of her uncle's seat.

"I have a feeling the news that you wanted to tell me is a bad news.."

"I am glad you became a healthy smart girl. I am glad you tried to find my address while you couldn't even get any news from your mother..I think you are mature enough to know this story..."

"Uncle, please don't make me confused.." her voice cracks.

"Your mom, my only sister has mental problem since she left you and your father...When she came back here crying, I thought she was just depressed but then she acted really weird. Day by day, I saw her laughing then suddenly screaming and crying..I brought her to a psychiatrist..." 

"Do you mean she became abnormal now?" she asked.

"In this case, yes...She was first diagnosed with posttraumatic stress disorder because of her loss. You know she couldn't even contact you anymore at that time. Your father didn't even contact us anymore. Then..doctor said she needs to be hospitalised. and me, as her only family agreed to let her stay in the hospital"

No...it can't be..I see a tear is running down Hyorin's face. She....almost sobs..

"Then after 2 years she was being hospitalized, she never recovered since then...If you are ready to meet her, I can bring you to her homecare and you can meet her there..But you have to know that she still has this psychotic disorders and she can't live her normal life anymore...that's why, your father has been keeping this story from you. he knows you will be mad if he is the one who told you this" 

"But I received a letter from her, few years back" she argued.

'You can hate me now..that's a letter from me..I decided to write you a letter because your mother started to talk about her daughter again...she remembers your name and even she spoke korean language.." Oh god...what kind of news is this?

Why the hell she has this kind of life? She started to cry really hard now. I move closer to her and comfort her.

"Hajima Hyorin-ah...don't cry..sssshh, she might be recovered after seeing you..hmm?" I tried to motivate her.

"I am really sorry for being a bad uncle Hyorin..but this is all for you..we all wanted you to be ready when you heard all this..I am really sorry"

She then shed her tears and said "I wanna meet her today" 

= = = = = = = = = = = = = =

We are in Albert and Van Huut, home health care in Haarlem. Her mom moved here three years ago when she became a bit better. Hyorin didn't even make any conversation when we were on our way here.

"Are you sure with this?" I asked her when we came inside the home care.

"I am not even sure with my life anymore, Jonghyun" Those words hurt me...How could you do this to her god? 

"We can see her now, Hyorin" that's what Uncle Gerard said after he met some of the nurse.

She slowly move her feet and follow her uncle steps. I don't know why but I feel my heart beats really fast. I am scared she won't be strong enough to see her mother...

"Marien.." her uncle slowly opens the door while Hyorin stops her steps.

"Ooooh Gerard - - - - - " I heard lady's voice from inside. It must be her mom speaking in Dutch language.

I approached Hyorin who stands in the middle of the corridor. Her uncle keeps the door opens and Hyorin doesn't want to show her face yet.

"You will be alright" and I hold her hands. I wanna give her some of my strength too. She started to walk again and I brought her to go to inside her mother's room.

"Marien..you have a new visitor today..." Uncle Gerard start to speak in English again, her mom looks confused. She is sitting on the chair in front of the window. I can see her clean gray eyes, her pointed nose and the freckles on her face. She looks like Hyorin. She is a beautiful lady...

"It's Hyorin, Marien...." Uncle Gerard introduced Hyorin to her mother.

"Hyorin....? Is she your new student, Gerard? I like her name..Nice to meet you young lady" that's what her mother said.

Lord....She couldn't remember her daughter..

"Oh..You are not alone, miss..? he must be your boyfriend!" She recognized me who stands beside Hyorin. I still hold her hand. She even holds my hand back tightly.

"Umma...." I am shocked when I heard Hyorin speaks in Korean. I can see that her mom was stunned because Hyorin called her Umma.

This is the most tragical moment I have ever witnessed in my life.

"Umma....? it's me..It's Hyorin, Umma.." Hyorin released her hand from mine. Then she approached her mom. Her mom turned her face to Uncle Gerard.

"Gerard..why is she acting like this? Gerard, why don't you bring me the fresh flowers today? I really want to smell some fresh flowers" 

"Hyorin..I think she needs time to recognize you..We'll talk to the nurse about this..Please don't force her" 

"My Marien..I am sorry about her. Oh shame on me! I forgot to bring you the flowers. I will bring them tomorrow morning hmm?" he talks nicely to her.

All of sudden, Hyorin started to walk out of the room and run. I think she really needs her time. What is it now, God...? I left the room and go to the toilet. I can't see this anymore. I can't see her struggling like this.

Hyorin's POV

To know the fact that you missed your mother, the fact that she became mentally ill then she doesn't even recognize you anymore is actually a good reason to die...I walked out of the room to the garden in front of this home care. 

My only mother doesn't recognize me after separated for 8 years..What did I do wrong god?

I am sitting on the bench at the park, thinking what should I do next? Leave her? or should I stay here beside her? I am really confused. I can't believe I came here just to listen to this nasty story. 

All of sudden...

"YA! What the hell are you doing here?" Jonghyun's voice came.

I look at him who is standing right in front of me. Now what GOD!!! I shed my tears and smile to him.

"Well..I think I need a fresh air...What are you doing here?" He then sits beside me.

"Just checking if you are still alive..haha" 

"Let's go home..." I said.

"What? are you serious?" he asked and turn his face to me.

"I'll tell uncle Gerard now...call our driver, I wanna go back and sleep" I left him.

I can't be here anymore...I need my time to think about all this and to accept this...