Chapter Six; Its Okay Even If It Hurts.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay. I love her, that’s enough, so it’s okay.”

Dongwoon repeated to himself as he though it was some kind of mantra that could make his heart aches less.
He was looking at you who was in the arms of another man.
He wished so hard and was ready to give up everything to be in that man’s place.

Dongwoon’s stupid.
That’s what all his friends say to him.
How could he not be when he’s head over heels in love with a woman that could never be his.
Blame his age or maybe his stubbornness but he could not stop loving you.

You are a woman five years his senior and of all the people he could love, he chose to love you.
It’s sad. He’s promising. Dongwoon was an eye candy for all the women in the university.
He could probably get any girl he wants with his attractive and unique facial features but he refused.
He only wants you and you only.

He’s been told countless times that he should get over you, that crushes are supposed to last this long but he insist.
He keeps saying that there’s no one else for him but you.

This is stupid considering how you are in a serious relationship with your boyfriend of three years.
He knew that fact well, that you weren’t available for him and yet he doesn’t stop trying to reach out to you.

You ahd always thought of Dongwoon as junior whom you treasure and whom you could rely on.
Not aware of how long it had been that he’s been longing for you.
What more of the tears he shed every single night when he couldn’t sleep and think of only you.

He doesn’t know what’s wrong or what he could do to make things better.
He always ask himself, is he hurting you by loving you so that’s why you don’t spare a thought for his feelings?
Or is this a punishment for him to have loved you too much?
He doesn’t have any answers to those questions but he knows it well himself that he would do anything for you.

That even if he had to give up everything, he would.
That even if it could hurt him down to his bone, it doesn’t matter.
Even if it continues to hurting he would tolerate it, he would endure it.
Just as long as you could be his, it’s okay even if he hurts.
Hurting is the least, he doesn’t care about pain.
He just needs you.
Seeing you far from him is the worst pain that he could experience.

“ Dongwoon-ah, stop this. Move on.”

His friend, Kikwang, tried to advise him in hopes that maybe this time he would heed it.
But it was obvious that he was just gonna let his feelings take the best of him.

The saddest part of this story isn’t about how Dongwoon would sacrifice for you but it was the fact that there was once when you were attracted to him and that you even attempt to tell him that you had liked him.
But you didn’t.
And Dongwoon, not knowing all these, didn’t say anything.

You moved on, to your current boyfriend of course and there is Dongwoon, still in the past.
What would it be like if you did told him that once?