This feels like a never-ending cycle.

Every time I moved away from Jongin, he would close in the gap I created with a determined step.

It was almost as if he was…desperate.

Desperate to close in that gap created from the many years of separation, hatred and…love.

“Stop it!” I finally cried out as Jongin attempted once again to close in that gap between us, “Stop stepping in every time I move away!”

“Soyoung?” Jongin widened his eyes, “What’s wrong?”

I cringed as Jongin stared at me with hurt curiosity written all over his handsome face, and my heart twanged painfully as I mustered my courage to say the very words I thought I would never be able to say.

“I don’t love you anymore, my lord.” I spelled out each word slowly, as if scared that Jongin would not be able to understand, “I love someone else.”

I watched as Jongin’s face fell, and there was a moment of silence before Jongin let out a short laugh.

“Right.” Jongin nodded his head, “You love someone else. Right. I see.”

“S-So…” I bit my lips as I backed away from him even further, “P-please stop coming to find me, I…I really can’t see you anymore.”

“My dear Soyoung,” Jongin sighed, heaving out a long, uneven breath, “I thought I told you already that I don’t believe it when you say you love another man. I know you better than yourself, you will never love-“

“-No.” I cut Jongin off his words as I kept my distance, “You don’t know me at all.”

Jongin paused for a bit at my sudden declaration, then, a short, amused laugh escaped his lips.

“Why, of course I know you, Soyoung!” Jongin shook his head as if I was sprouting nonsense, “We were married for how many years already?”

“Even so, you still don’t know me. You never took the chance to know me better, you were always tempted away by all these other gorgeous woman around you. I was just one of your many concubines.”

“Soyoung…” Jongin trailed off, the confidence in his eyes melting away into sadness, “I know your personality and interests by heart. How could you say such a cruel thing to me?”

“Then tell me.” I challenged Jongin, “Tell me who I am.”

A small smirk appeared on Jongin’s face as he tilted his head and gazed into my eyes.

“You’re a beautiful flower, my dear Soyoung.” Jongin said huskily, “You’re gentle, sweet, fragile…and as beautiful and fragrant as a flower blossoming in the morning sun.”

I felt a dull thud of nauseousness hit me straight in the chest, and I stared back into Jongin’s confident gaze as sadness swept inside of me.

“You’re wrong.” I whispered as I watched that confidence of his fading away into confusion, “I’m not a flower.”

“Then what are you?” Jongin frowned, visibly displeased at my rejection of his description of me, “What else can you be if you’re not a flower?”

“I am, my lord,” I spoke with an unwavering voice, “A warrior.”

~~~

Pit pat. Pit pat. Pit pat.

I blinked as three drops of rain fell onto my eyelids, and I shut my eyes and let the droplets slide down my cheeks.

After declaring myself a warrior, I ran away from Jongin, without waiting to hear of his opinions about my new found identity.

“A warrior, huh?” I laughed dryly to myself as more raindrops began falling from the sky, “Am I really a warrior?”

Biting my lips, I had a sudden feeling of emptiness.

Everything I worked and lived so hard for was starting to peel off its vibrant colours and show its bare face to me.

The deadly Exo M, whom I thought was powerful, was in fact just a bunch of cowards.

Kim Jongin, whom I thought understood me better than anyone, saw only the artificial side of me during our past years as a married couple.

And I, who had been living my whole life as a delicate flower, was actually struggling this whole time to push myself into the case of a warrior.

Everything seemed so artificial…yet real at the same time to me.

It was as if I didn’t know what to think anymore.

“…but…you….no….”

My eyes perked up as a distant voice caught my attention, and dragging myself out of my own little world of thoughts, I wandered over to where the source of the noise came from.

*Sehun…?*

My eyes lit up as I saw from behind a bush, Sehun and Warrior Yonghwa talking in a hushed tone; though I could just barely hear their conversation through the leaves.

“Why did you abandon mum?” My eyes widened as I heard the hurt in Sehun’s tone, “Did you know the pain she’s been through because of you? People had been laughing at her, calling her a widow and a . Did you know that?”

Warrior Yonghwa showed no expressions as he stood there in that military pose of his, and he said nothing as he stared at Sehun so intently it seemed like he was going to burn a hole through Sehun’s face.

“Yah! Ahjussi!” Sehun snapped as Warrior Yonghwa made no response, “Answer me! Just why did you abandon-“

“-Call me dad.”

Sehun froze, and a conflicted expression made its way upon Sehun’s face.

“D-dad…?” Sehun finally let out an absurd laugh, “You want me to call you…dad?”

“You’re my son, aren’t you?” Warrior Yonghwa replied Sehun calmly, “Then it’s normal that you should