Jongin’s POV

The moment I regretted my decision, she was already swinging lifelessly in mid-air.

She was just hanging there, raven black hair falling limply over her face and her frail body clothed with the blue hanbok I gave her when we were children.

It was as if she was a ghost, filled with so much sadness and anger that she came to haunt me as soon as she died.

But she wasn’t.

She was just a poor, pitiful girl who lived her life loving me and ended her life still loving me.

Sometimes, in the darkness of the night, she would come to me in my dreams.

Her large eyes would hold so much grief, and her silky hair would flow down her back like mournful tears. Every time she spoke, her voice came out like a melancholic song.

And every time, she would only say one thing to me before disappearing into the darkness.

“My lord, don’t you remember the promise you made to me?”

“Your highness.”

I snapped out of my daze as a worried voice interrupted my train of thoughts.

I turned my head slowly around and saw Chansung standing before me, his handsome face pulled down into a concerned frown.

“Your highness, are you okay?”

I blinked once, and felt wetness on my cheeks. It was then that I realized there were tears streaming down my eyes.

“I’m fine.” I quickly wiped those damned tears away and regained my composure. “What is it that you want?”

“Your highness, it really is time you go and pay respect to your mother’s grave.”

I scowled.

“I’m not in the mood today, Chansung.” I folded my hands behind me and turned my back on him. “Maybe another day.”

“Your highness!” Chansung sounded stressed, “You must set an example to the people of this country! The late emperor would not approve of your behaviour right now!”

“Hah.” I was starting to feel angry towards Chansung whom I had regarded as a hyung for all my life, “What do you know about my father?”

Chansung’s frown deepened.  “I know that he was an admirable man. My father who served him told me so.”

“Oh?” I scoffed, “And this…admirable man would leave my mother to rot to death locked up in her pavilion?”

Chansung sighed.

“That was because she committed a wrongdoing, your highness. As much as you love your mother, what she did was wrong-“

“-Oh, don’t get me wrong, Chansung.” My eyes was hard as anger burned my heart, “I don’t love her.”

Confliction flashed past Chansung’s eyes.

“Yes, you heard me right.” I paced to and fro in front of Chansung, “How could I love the woman who beat me and cursed me and damned me so many times until I became afraid of myself? No, I couldn’t love a mother like that.”

Chansung’s eyes softened.

“Your highness-“

“-I’m not done talking yet, Chansung.” I interrupted Chansung’s words harshly, “Do you know how hard I had to work just to climb to this position? Me, the exiled concubine’s son. How could I have become the emperor at the end of the day? Ridiculous, isn’t it?”

Chansung pressed his lips together into a frown as I began laughing hysterically.

But I couldn't care less if I seemed crazy to him right now. In fact, I do feel crazy.

I mean, what sane man would be able to have a conversation with a dead concubine in the middle of the day?

It felt so real. But at the same time, it felt so fake.

“I had to either kill or frame my brothers, Chansung.” I continued to speak fearlessly, “My precious step brothers who used to mock me are now all underneath my feet. And I, Kim Jongin, is now the great emperor of Korea. How ironic.”