Hello Once More,

You haven’t forgotten who I was, right? I haven’t forgotten about you, figuring out your name, or anything. It’s just that I haven’t been able to write to you for about a week or so. I’ve been too drained of energy to do much of anything, really. I kind of find it funny that sitting around all day listening to people drone on about needless things drains one’s energy immediately.

Most days I had to be in meetings that sometimes started at four or five in the morning and stay all the way until two in the morning at the company.

I just don’t understand. Why were the producers THAT worried about the filming of the drama? Is it actually a bad storyline? Are they second guessing about casting me as the second lead? Were the meetings actually necessary? I highly doubt that they were, but I guess it’s of no use to question it now.

We did, however, work together on our scripts whenever there were breaks in between, which helped a lot. During those times, Siwon tried his best to help me. He actually tried his best to stay by my side during this entire week. I think it was so that I didn’t have a break down due to the stressful atmosphere. But he doesn’t know that this stress is nothing compared to what I endured in the past. He doesn’t need to know that though, because then it will just cause worthless questions and worry. I’m glad that he at least tried to help me, and had thought about me. Even if it was just a little bit.

I say he “tried” because after the second day of meetings, Heechul came to visit him at times. Actually, it was almost all the time that he was around. When we went home after a long day of meeting after meeting, Heechul was there.  When we remembered to eat, Heechul was there. When we came out of our second or third meeting, he was definitely there. When I began to laugh with Siwon and felt like I could talk to him or crack a joke, he appeared. Whatever time it was, the man never failed to appear. He most certainly enjoyed appearing when I was starting to get close with my roommate. Soon enough, I gave up and distanced myself, but that didn’t even stop Heechul from coming.

While Siwon was taking care of entertaining his guest, I befriended the other leads working with us. IU is probably the one that I’m the closest to out of all of them. We actually hit it off pretty quickly. She’s a really sweet girl. At first, I wondered how well she would be able to pull of the second lead’s personality until we practiced our parts. I bet that she found it hard to be like that. Then again, I wonder about her at times—especially when she helps Yoona with playing pranks on the other people.

When we wanted to talk about something other than work, there was a time when she began to talk about Changmin. I wonder how IU (or Ji Eun, since she asked me to call her that) could feel like that man is her perfect match. They’re so different, and I really thought her perfect match was the famous guy from Big Bang. However, the girl supposedly has a huge crush on Changmin, and wishes that he could possibly see the way she feels about him. She doesn’t really mind if he returns her feelings or not, she just wants him to know about her feelings so that she doesn’t have to pretend anymore.

At the moment, the two are really good friends, which is extremely cute. There were a couple of times when the man actually came to visit her. Because of the fact that other people were around, he was awkward and couldn’t say much to her. But she was beaming like a miniature sun that it was hard to even look at her, she was that bright.

I should talk to Changmin about his thoughts about her sometime in the future when I have a chance. It’s the least I could do for Ji Eun.

The lead for the drama, Yoona, is pretty amazing as well. She’s also a sweetheart. But there are times when she can be a little tricky.

The incident that made us first start socializing together was when she tied my shoelaces together without me knowing. I was talking to someone else who was also a rookie actor when the girl asked me if I wanted to go with her to get a coffee. Since coffee had become my best friend, I agreed to go with. Unexpectedly, I took a step and fell flat on my face. Right as I had done so, Heechul and Siwon were walking our way. When Heechul caught sight of my fall, he began to laugh the hardest. Even Ji Eun had to snort at my little mistake as she helped me up.

I can’t deny the fact that it was extremely funny. I smile even now when I think about it. However, I’d rather that Heechul didn’t see it. I don’t know why I’m like this, because he’s actually a pretty interesting person. If he wasn’t always attached to Siwon, I’d be friends with him and spend time with him. Why do I have such a problem with him being connected at the hip with Siwon? I just don’t get it…

Maybe…No! No, no, no, and NO! I can’t think like that! I will not think about that! Not one bit!

…

Aside from Yoona’s prankster ways, she’s a pretty cool person. Since she is Ji Eun’s sunbae, the girls were exchanging polite words when I first met them. But now, they’re really close and include me on everything that they do. It’s pretty fun, being able to get along with my co-workers that is. I really enjoy it.

From the time spent with my two new friends, I found out that Yoona has a boyfriend, but he’s not from the company. I’m not even sure if he’s part of another company or has a completely different profession. I learned that Ji Eun has all of the men swooning over her, and she doesn’t like it. Supposedly I was one of the few who didn’t swoon over either of them from the first time we met. They also found it pretty cool that they felt so comfortable around me. Is that odd that they felt comfortable enough to say their secrets after such a short time? I wasn’t able to do that for them, but maybe at some point I’d be able to.

Maybe I should ask them about their thoughts as to why I feel so angry at Siwon and Heechul for being so close all the time…

But I fear that they might give me the answer that I don’t want to hear or think about, so maybe I won’t.

…

Well, I’m anticipating good things to happen during this drama. My colleagues are amazing, and I’ve been able to fit in pretty easily. The first day of filming will begin in a few minutes and it’s slightly nerve-wracking. When we were practicing, I realized how well Yoona and Ji Eun can act. I felt so inferior to them that I didn’t know what to do with myself. Truthfully, the two complimented my acting, but I felt like they were just being nice. I feel like my skills are nowhere close to theirs.

Siwon was too busy to ever say any constructive criticism whenever I needed it. He was always too busy—he still is. Here we are now on the first day of filming, and he’s going around conversing with everyone. Everyone but me.

That’s alright, though. I’ll just stick to Ji Eun, Yoona, and the others. He’s just someone who shares a room with me. I can’t get too attached.

I think I might be too tired, that’s probably the reason as to why it’s affecting me.

Anyways, filming is starting, so I can’t write any longer. I would like to write more, but I can’t. And I’m a little too frazzled to get actual thoughts out. I’ll take my leave now, so wish me luck!

~I Think I Might Like Him…~