He was on a run. He was trying to escape. Key had a past Amber had no thought of imagining. As she read the diary that Key kept for so long, despite the short list of entries he made, she was able to glue the pieces of the puzzle all together. The way Key didn't trust just anyone, the way Key seem to avoid talking about his family. It was something he doesn't want to talk about in the first place. He lost his mother so early and had to face everyone's criticism on what had happened. The only question left is what will happen to them now?

Amber had been reading Key's diary for the longest time she can remember. She hasn't been going out that much since she opened the said item. She goes out for a while but doesn't stay out too much. She'd go to her store, eat out for a little and go straight home. Once again, she's got used of not having anyone around. She no longer sought for Myungsoo's presence though at times she'd unconsciously call out his name when she's eating. Also, she doesn't answer the lad's calls or messages.

--------------

It's a Thursday afternoon and Amber has been lying on her couch, she's giggling quietly by herself. She's reading the diary again and was on the part where Key made doodles under the entry when Eunjung gave him chocolates. He made random doodles of flowers, chocolates and cartoons. Amber noticed that Key had an artistic side to him though he doesn't show it. A door bell soon followed.

Amber walked towards the door and peeked throught the eye hole only to find that it was Myungsoo.

"Drat." She said under her breath. 

Before opening the door, she went for the diary and hid it somewhere safe. She didn't want Myungsoo to see it in any way possible. She hid it beside some enyclopedias she had near the television to disguise it from the guy's vision.

-------------

"You sure answered the door after quite a long time."

"Sorry.. I was listening to music. I didn't hear you ringing."

The lad casually walked in and sat on the sofa placed on the center of the living room.

"Hey Myungsoo.."

"Hey.. How have you been Amber? It's been a while."

"Yeah.. So, what brings you here?"

Myungsoo looked at Amber with a little puzzled and  hurt look on his face. "You make it sound as if you don't want me around?"

"Ahh.. No. It's not like that. I mean, what's up? Is something up that made you pass by so unprecented, that's all. You could've texted or called me that you're arriving. I could've at least prepared some food or something."

"Well, I just figured that a surprise visit is better.."

"I see. I'll just heat up some spaghetti. Want some?"

"Yeah, sure."

----------------

Amber and Myungsoo had a silent meal on eating up the spaghetti. It was an awkward air that was worse than when they first met. Myungsoo would take little glances on Amber and smile faintly on seeing some sauce mess up the girl's face. He'd motion to reach out to wipe the sauce off of Amber's cheek but the girl would seem to read his mind and wipe it by herself. 

"You've been acting weird lately.." 

"Me? Am I? I don't really think I've been acting weird. I.. I'm just tired lately."

"It doesn't seem that way Amber.. You look preoccupied with something. I can't tell what it really is, but I feel something's up."

"You think too much Myungsoo, I'm fine.."

--------------

Myungsoo was doubtful of Amber's statements. He really feels that something is up. Like what he said, he can't tell on what it is but at the bottom of his gut he just knows. The look on Amber's eyes was that of a woman who was going through something. A look which reflected deep thoughts on a matter. Myungsoo didn't like it. It seemed as if it was something that was pulling Amber away from him.

"You know, I'm really curious of something.."

"What is it?"

"Remember the day that we had lunch with Nana?"

"Yeah. It was a few weeks ago, right?"

"Yeah. I was kind of surprised that when I came back after from buying something for Nana, you left all so suddenly.."

"Ah, well I ughh. There was an emergency that came up at my store. I had to fix a few things because apparently one of my staff called in sick and no one was going to look after the store. I filled in for her. Didn't you receive my message?"

"Well, I did. But, well we were supposed to have coffee that day, didn't you have another staff to fill in? I mean.. you are the boss,you shouldn't be bothered by minor things.."

"I keep a close eye on my business. I think you should know that.."

"Well, yeah. Did Nana say anything to you when I left?"

"Nothing.. She just talked about how you and all of your friends were in high school, that's all."

"Really? I mean.. Did she tell you anything that'll make you mad at me?"

Amber was starting to get a little annoyed at Myungsoo. He seemed like a kid asking such petty questions.

"No. What's with all the questions Myungsoo? You're not the type that asks and snoops too much.."

"I just feel Nana said something. You wouldn't leave if she didn't say anything.."

"Look, she didn't okay? Get over it."

Amber turned around to head to her room but suddenly Myungsoo grabbed her on the arm and planted his lips on the girl real good. Amber's eyes widened by the lad's actions. She was completely taken aback, she didn't like what Myungsoo was doing one bit. She started smacking Myungsoo but instead he stuck his lips tighter. Amber had no choice but to push him away and slap Myungsoo on the face. She was crying.

"What's up with you?!" She shouted.

"Amber, I'm.."

"Get out! Please.. I don't know what words I'll say if you don't get out now."

Myungsoo walked towards Amber but the girl warned her.

"If you ever want to see me again, you'll step out of my place right now. I'm telling you Myungsoo.. I'm serious."

Myungsoo bowed an apologetic one and left. Amber had tears on her eyes. She felt a little betrayed because she never imagined that Myungsoo would do that to her.

------------

Truth is, Amber lied. Nana did tell her something but it wasn't about Myungsoo. It was about Key.

"I talked to him a few days ago to cancel the wedding. We talked for quite a long time actually. You know what he said? He said that he doesn't want to push through with the marriage anymore. He said that he can't make a mistake one after the other. I wasn't sure what he was talking about but afterwhich he mentioned something. He said that he can no longer keep on breaking someone's heart. He said that his stupidity got the best of him. He didn't say anything but I noticed he was looking at a picture of you he had on his desk. That's when I realized that my speculations were right. Key is indeed inlove with you. I saw it Amber.. In his eyes, he loves you too much. I think he even loves you more than he loves himself. I know I'm not in the position to say this, but don't hate on Key, Amber. Believe me, he loves you."

Nana's words were the words that made Amber leave. She was on a crisis that moment. She had Myungsoo on her side but inside, she sought for Key.. The entirety of her being wanted him back.

-------------

It's been two days and Amber looked at the calendar. She heaved a deep sigh. It was already a Sunday. She's already forgiven Myungsoo for the entire incident they had the other day, she kind of missed the boy a little bit. He was annoying but Amber finds him cute as hell as well,  especially when he does unconscious aegyo.

She texted Myungsoo.. "Want to come over for lunch?"

She didn't expect anything but it would be nice if they could make up for lost time. 

In just a few minutes past noon, Myungsoo came. Amber opened the door and Myungsoo was obviously crying.

"Amber.. I.."

"No need to cry, come in."

The two had a casual lunch. They had started talking and Myungsoo liked knowing that Amber was no longer mad at him. They hanged out at the living room after eating and shared laughs.

"Uhmm, Amber?"

"Yeah? What is it?"

"Well, I was wondering if you'd like to watch my final performance tonight? Tonight is the last showing, so I thought it would be best for you to see it."

Amber's eyes widened with the Myungsoo's offer. "Tonight? Really? Tonight is your last performance?" The boy nodded.

Amber thought for some time. She sighed and agreed to watch Myungsoo's performance.

Myungsoo couldn't really leap for joy on Amber agreeing to watch him. He felt a hesitation on Amber's yes.

"I'll just take a bath and change.. I think it'll be good for us to eat dinner early out and just share a drink later tonight. What do you think?"

"Yeah.. I think that's great."

Amber left in a few to take a bath. Myungsoo smiled and shook off the thought. He felt a little bored a few minutes after and started to look around Amber's set of books. He noticed however one that seemed a little out of place since it looked quite torn. He took it out and realized it was a notebook. He quickly passed by each page and noticed a note inserted in the middle. He took it out. It was folded neatly. He felt it was wrong to open it but thinking Amber wouldn't mind, he opened it anyway.

---------------------

"Sorry, I took quite a long time."

"No, it's okay. Let's go?"

Amber nodded.

The two headed for the kimchi stew place they always go to. It's been two weeks since they last came and it was refreshing to be back. On a personal note, Amber felt happy to be back. She hasn't had a full meal in a while since she's been reading Key's diary for so long.

"It's really great to be back.." Amber said.

They ate the kimchi happily but Amber noticed Myungsoo was quiet. She just thought that he might be nervous because she's watching.

"We've still got time don't we?" Myungsoo asked.

"Well, your show doesn't start until 8:00pm right? I presume call time is 7:00pm.. So, yeah.. We've got plenty of time."

"Okay.. Do you mind going somewhere?"

"No, anywhere is fine."

Myungsoo then held Amber's hand. The girl didn't let go seeming it would seem like a good consolation for the argument they had. What surprised Amber though was Myungsoo brought her to the restaurant they first had a "date". She asked what they were doing there but Myungsoo didn't reply anything else besides the fact that he just likes it. Soon after, they went to a park and played a little of basketball. Amber still got her moves which definitely surprised Myungsoo. It was almost dusk when they finished and both were clad in sweat and wet clothes.

"Can we go to your store first and buy clothes before we head to the theater?" Myungsoo asked. Amber just nodded in agreement.

----------

The two changed their clothes. It was a little past 6:30pm and Amber asked whether Myungsoo was already late for call time. The lad said no. The two of them then rode in a cab since the theater was quite far.

"You better perform well tonight, okay?"

"Of course.."

Myungsoo felt it was still early so he brought Amber to his sanctuary. Amber didn't want to but Myungsoo insisted. It was the place where he asked whether he could court Amber or not. He took out his guitar and sang a song.  Amber was surprised by his actions. She just listened carefully.

"That was relaxing wasn't it?. Let's go."

They rode back in the cab to finally head for the theater. It was a little past 7:00pm and Amber grew worried for Myungsoo. What Amber noticed though that they weren't going anywhere near the theater where Myungsoo will be performing, REALLY far off route.

"Where are we going?" Amber asked. The lad didn't answer. Later on the trip Amber realized that they were going to Han River.. She looked at Myungsoo and the lad just smiled back at her. 

A few minutes later they arrived at one end of the Han River. 

"Myungsoo.."

"I think it was just proper that I brought you to all the places we shared great memories at..You know? I was happy that I can let someone into my sanctuary without having doubts. I'll definitely miss us going there."

Amber was on the verge of tears. "But, how did you?"

"It's no longer necessary how I knew about it." Myungsoo then looked at Amber.

"This is enough as an answer for me. I love you Amber. But if I force myself into you? We'll just be making a fools out of ourselves. I know you don't want to hurt me in any way possible. But I can't bear the thought of you losing the person that made you truly happy because of a decision you think would be right at the situation. I can't bear the thought of you choosing me just because you felt it was the right thing. I want to receive it because you truly feel like it. (Sigh) Looks like I lost. I guess this is goodbye, isn't it?"

Amber cried and hugged unto Myungsoo. "Find a girl that will love you in ways that I can't.. You deserve better Myungsoo.. You don't deserve a girl like me. I'm sorry. and Thank you.. Thank you so much."

Amber let go of the hug, kissed Myungsoo on the cheek and started running off. Myungsoo started crying when he knew that Amber can no longer hear him.

---------------

Amber ran.. She ran as fast as she can. She owed Myungsoo everything she was doing right at that moment..It was in Key's letter. She doesn't know how Myungsoo saw it but he definitely read Key's letter for Amber. 

"August 2013
Ambeo-yah? I guess you've already read my diary after halmeoni gave it to you. You must be thinking why only a letter? Why not tell you everything in person.? To be honest, it's because I can't. I can't because I'm scared. I'm scared that if I face you now, I might drive you away because I know that I've hurt you deeply. I'm a coward aren't I? After eomma's death, I felt rejected. I felt unwanted especially by appa. I was in pain. I didn't want to trust anyone that's why I started closing people off. I hated my appa for being irrational and letting his emotions take over him but in the end, I turned out to be like him. I drove you away. I drove the one person I felt that is the one for me. I was stupid. It was a foolish thing to do. That's also one of the reasons why I can't meet you.. I'm scared that you might see me as a changed person. I'm scared to lose you Amber. I'm scared for you to leave me. Every night, after you left the company there's not a day I wouldn't think of you. Then I thought, who am I to stop you? I'm a bastard that broke your heart so you deserve better but I can't bear the thought of it. I know this may seem a little out of the blue but on the 23rd of September, I'll be waiting at the bridge near Han River at 7:00pm. I'll wait for you until 8:00pm Amber. I hope you give me at least one last chance to explain everything. No matter what it takes, I need to see you that day. I love you Amber, I've always been, always will."

Amber ran and ran some more. She was starting to run out of breath but she can't stop. It's only a few minutes before 8:00pm. Tears are now running down on her cheeks faster because she can't bear the thought of losing Key forever. Myungsoo must've felt the pain she held. She didn't want to hurt Myungsoo so she agreed to see his performance but after realizing, she just can't. Losing Key may be the biggest mistake she'll ever make in her life.

She stopped in the middle of the bridge by the Han River amidst the dancing lights. She turned and looked around.

.....................

It was him.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay, I take it back. THIS is the longest chapter I've ever written. I wanted to make it up to my subscribers since it's been like forever since I last posted chapter 40.  
This chapter, I myself was on the verge while writing this. Myungsoo's sacrifice, have you ever done that for someone you cared for so much? Aghh.. The next one.. Stay tuned bbs! THANK YOU SO MUCH.