I was asked to stay in the kitchen by Mr. Cha. NamJoon and Ho Seok’s argument had come to a standstill. Neither of them had proven anything. Yes, NamJoon could answer questions about me but he didn’t have time to put into any type of relationship. Ho Seok had time to work at his studio and be head security at the company but his careless efforts to truly care for someone whole was questionable.

            By the end, Jin and Mr. Cha and I were the only ones. It was odd, sitting were YoonGi normally sat with Jin across from me. He sat straight up, shoulders squared and hands folded on the table. Mr. Cha at the head of the table, it was like looking into the future of Jin. Not much different in stance.

            “Sam.” Mr. Cha spoke with a sigh. My heart jumped and I looked his way, but didn’t make eye contact. “My sons are very important to me, and I know you know this.”  I nodded. “But you have grown important to them, and though at first, I did not see it, I now know why.” He turned to me and I felt his eyes on me. “Jin said it was ridiculous to think; just coincidence. But after seeing the way that TaeHyung and Jeung Guk have attached themselves to you, I see it.”

NamJoon

            The deal was simple! Whoever she picked, would be the one who married her. Not whoever slept with her first. He’s always trying to take shortcuts and get things the easy way! I’m happy she said no to him and I’m happy he got caught. I’m happy Jin and Father exsposed his selfishness to her and the family.

            I know my short comings are nothing I can make excuses for, but I can actually care for her. Get to know her whole heartedly and be there for her later… If there will ever be a later for us. There has to be! This is only temporary. After Jin gets married, things will be less hectic and I can be with her.

Ho Seok

            Narcissistic? Selfish? I am everything any girl would want! I have a dance studio, money, fashion sense, the big brotherly figure! And all I want is for Sam to say she wants me back. That she’ll marry me and be with me when time comes. What’s so selfish about that? Her past is nothing to me if it doesn’t involve me!

            This is ridiculous. The first girl I actually want to stick around is “too good” for me. Nonsense.

Samuel

            Things weren’t the same. The next day, Ho Seok left early without a word. NamJoon stayed for breakfast but followed his father and two older brothers to the company after breakfast. Jimin and Tae were to go in later, since they were still learning the ropes. Just Kook and I were going to be home, and he still wasn’t feeling well. Mr. Cha busted Kook for his stash of sweets.

            Jimin was now put in charge of himself, Tae and Kook, so he was supposed to schedule Kook’s dentist appointment. I offered but Jimin said he wanted to take care of his little brothers for once. I was just worried that he would get overwhelmed in his beginning stages of work.

            It was around 1pm, Kook was cuddled up on the couch in a blanket like a burrito and I was on the other couch. We were watching a movie about a werewolf child. It was pretty good. Kook had taken some muscle relaxers and was sound asleep on the couch.

            His breaths were even and soothing, I found myself staring for a little while. Must be an easy life here, knowing this is your place in the world and all. He has brothers to help teach him, and a father to help support him.

            I began to miss my own family at this point. The first time in a long time I felt lonely, in the sense of homesickness. Having the guys around felt like all was well.

            I went to my room, and grabbed my cell phone. It seemed like so long ago I needed to use it. I hadn’t called my parents in god knows how long. I wonder if they were worried… Or dealing with my brother. I sat on my bed and went into my contacts. House Phone; and pressed call. Each ring I felt more and more guilty.

            “Hello?” It was my brother, James. I couldn’t say anything; my mouth was just open. “Hello?” he asked again. Then he hung up. I dropped my phone and began to sob.

            I rolled off the bed and was sitting on the ground with my knees up to my chest.

            “Noona?” I heard Kook at the door and looked up to see him still wrapped in his blanket but in my door way. I wiped my face and blinked to focus my eyes back but they didn’t. “Are you okay?” he asked and I stood quickly, straightening out my clothes.

            “I’m okay.” I wiped my eyes again and kept blinking over and over.  Why didn’t the blur go?

            “Are you sure?” I nodded but he didn’t look convinced.

            “Are you hungry? Do you want more medicine?” he was just watching me try to get myself together.

            “Are your eyes okay?” I moved around him towards the kitchen. “You keep blinking; they look a little red too.” I turned to go into the kitchen and ran into the door frame of the kitchen; head first. “Sam!” Kook came over, dropping his blanket behind him. I felt my forehead, no blood which was good. “Forgot were the kitchen was?” he asked.

            “I wasn’t paying attention, that’s all.” Kook went back to grab his blanket but just threw it over the couch and came into the kitchen with me. He sat the island counters while I went through the fridge.             

            “I heard you crying…” he said low, I paused for a second but continued to pick out something to make for the hungry growing boy. “Is everything okay? I know it may seem like things are going to hell, but it not that bad.” I started to make kimbap with some instant rice.

            “I’m okay, I just… miss my family back home.”

            “That’s understandable. I don’t know what I would do if I left home right now.” I just smiled at him, knowing well that Jin and YoonGi would find him before he could get very far. It kind of make me smile to myself.

            Kook was watching me closely as I struggled to roll the rice with all the ingredients. I felt a hand over mine and saw Kook taking over for me. He rolled it perfectly, and handed it to me to cut. Just before I put the first slice in he grabbed my wrist with the knife in it.

            “What are you doing?” he said, I was shocked and didn’t know what he was talking about. “Sam, you almost cut your finger off!” he took the knife from me and pulled me into the light of the window in the kitchen. He was looking into my eyes but I didn’t look directly in his eyes. “I’m calling YoonGi.”

            “What? Why?” I asked looking at him, making eye contact.

            “Your eyes aren’t dilating fast enough, so you can’t focus.”

            “Kook, I’m fine. Seriously.” He took my face in his hands and looked into my eyes and I squinted to focus on him.

            “You ran into a wall, and almost cut your fingers off. How long have you been hiding this?” I didn’t answer. “It’s from when you hit your head right?” I nodded. He sighed and let go of me.

            “It just started though, maybe a few weeks ago.”

            “All you need is corrective surgery.” He said it so flawlessly. “We all go it, well Jin-hyung, YoonGi-hyung, NamJoon-hyung, and now Sam-Noona.” We both huffed a laugh and he finished cutting the rolls.

            We sat on the couch together as he ate, I wasn’t focusing on what was happening on the TV much. Things were just getting way too complicated at this point. Mr. Cha wants me to stay with his sons, but I don’t know if I can stay. It felt like my presence was tearing Ho Seok and NamJoon apart, then with everyone else in the middle, who was to get hurt? I looked at Kook, his barely noticeable scar from the first nights I met them.

            “Kook?”

            “Yeah?”

            “What happened that night? The night that you had to get stiches over your eye?” he stopped and was recalling the memory.

            “Ho Seok and NamJoon were fighting, and I came in at the wrong time.” It was quiet for a moment. “Ho Seok tried to walk away but NamJoon stopped him, and the first this Ho Seok did was swing at hyung. I stepped in-between and took the punch for NamJoon. Ho Seok was wearing a ring that day… and that’s how I got my bad boy scar.”

            “Why did you step in?”     

            “Because I thought if I stepped it they would see that I was around and stop. Normally that’s how things go, well here anyways.” I was quiet. Things seemed so hazy now for some reason. What was said? I could barely remember why they would be fighting, but I knew it was because of me. I felt down and kind of a lost cause.