LightDonghae

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Donghae smiled softly as he and Hyukjae were walking back to the classroom while the older hold his hand, but he had this bittersweet feeling inside of his heart. He knew that he should be happy. He should be happy for Hyukjae for having such a beautiful girlfriend, he should be happy for him because Hyukjae was happy.

Yet, he could. As more as he talk to himself that everything was good the more he believed that it was not. How could it be? Hyukjae had a girlfriend. His Hyukkie.

“Now … Don’t be so down anymore okay?” Hyukjae asked and Donghae saw that they already stood in front of his classroom. Lessons would start in one minute. He just nodded. “Okay.” Hyuk ruffled through his hair one more time, then he walked to his own room.

Donghae entered the classroom and could feel Kyuhyun’s and Henry’s stares on his back. But he decided to ignore them for a while. He needed time to think.

His friends had been right. He, Lee Donghae, was in love with his best friend. He knew that now. As soon as he had said it out loud this morning he knew that it was true. He hadn’t been so sure before, because he thought that it only was a little crush and because he thought that he was supposed to like girls.

But he liked Hyukjae.

… and Hyukjae had a girlfriend!

Donghae wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. Just… getting rid of his anger and his disappointment and screaming to the whole world that Hyukjae was supposed to be his. Wasn’t he?

Donghae bit his lower lip and stared at the table in front of him. The teacher had long entered and the lesson already started, but Donghae wasn’t aware of that.

Donghae had been right with his fear all the time. There was a girl in Hyukjae’s life which needed a lot of Hyuks time and attention and the more she got the less was left for Donghae. Donghae hated how he felt. He felt like he was interchangeable. Just like that.

He sniffed. Donghae doesn’t wanted that love. He never asked for it and he never was prepared for it to came. She simply took him by surprise and now he had to live with it.

With all its pain and all its disadvantages.

He wanted to bang his head against the table. He not only hated himself for falling in love with Hyukjae, but he hated this girl also. He hated how she penetrated into his life, how she claimed him as hers. She had no right to do so!

Not in his eyes.

“Lee Donghae!” Donghae looked up surprised. He met the concerned eyes of his teacher. “Do you want to go to the nurse room? You look really pale.” “Yes, sir.” Donghae stood up, took the paper from the teacher and left for the nurse room.

Only one nurse was there as he entered and she looked at him with her beautiful smile. “What can I do for you?” she asked in her sweet friendly voice.

“I just need to rest a bit… I guess.” He said silently and she nodded. She took the paper from Donghaes hand and guided him to one of the beds. He lay down and closed his eyes. The darkness and the silence was comfortable.

But it doesn’t lasted long until images of Hyukjaes face entered his thoughts. And then images of them together. Donghae opened his eyes fast. He doesn’t wanted to see it.

But it seemed like he really needed some rest, because he fell deeper and deeper into slumber as he stared at the ceiling, trying not to see them together. Because Hyukjae was his.  

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(c) dolphinqueenKya