The room was designed unexpectedly comfy, the whole room radiated relaxation, and the knob in my throat lightened a bit. The room had a bit of an coffee crème color, with brown accents on the furniture. The mahogany wooden desk and the light brown leather couch and work chair fit exactly with the wall decorations. I noticed the only person in the room was Lee So Man, Yumi must have finished already.

My thoughts were interrupted by So Man who walked over to a canteen plate with coffee and cake on it. “Coffee or Tea?” I walked to the plate and answered, “English blend tea please, with milk.” When So Man had poured the drinks I took the cups from him and walked back to the couch, placing my cup in front of me, and his on the opposite side of the table. He slowly sat down and picked up his cup, he took a sip and looked at me. “So, I heard you want to try composing?” I stared at him, forgetting the tea I was holding. “How did you know?” He smiled, “Well, the last years we have been keeping close contact with other companies. Mainly for the benefit of the Hallyu wave.” The last part definitely held the tone which made clear that if he didn’t need to, he would never consider such close contact with his competitors. He continued, “Last week I was suddenly contacted by an unknown number. I had an spare moment, and I picked up.” He took another sip, “I couldn’t have been more surprised by the caller.” He eyed me over his coffee, “Are you close with B.A.P? Or actually, Bang Yongguk?”

“Huh?” I stuttered, “Well, I, I have met them a few times. And we talked a bit.” Lee So Man didn’t seem to notice my uneasiness, “It isn’t a bad thing, contact and friendship with other groups can be handy. What do you think about composing?” I smiled, “I would love that.” I finally remembered my tea and took a sip, it was cold. “Well it’s settled then, I’ll call TS ent, and tell them you will come there to practice with Bang Yonguk.” I gulped, the tea went the wrong way, and I coughed for a while. “What do you mean?” Lee So Man looked at me, just as surprised as I was, “You didn’t think I would let you just figure something out on your own did you? You need someone to teach and help you.” I continued to look at him, still not understanding. Lee So Man continued to his desk, “Bang proposed it himself, and since you already know him it’s even better.” Still a bit off the world I barely noticed myself agreeing, and leaving the room again.

I regained self-consciousness when I found myself in an unknown empty hallway, I decided to try a few doors in hopes of finding something known. As I walked through the unknown corridors I recollected my thoughts. The next few months Yongguk would help me with composing, and I would practically live at the TS company instead of my own. Somehow instead of being happy I was worried, I was finally able to be honest with myself. Yes, I had developed feelings for him. And yes, I know it was impossible, I would always stay just a fan to him, and with a lot of luck I would become a real friend, but that was also the limit. And now faith had played it like this, how was I going to handle this. I sighed, I had always been a bad liar, and an even worse secret keeper. If I would spend so much time with him it was inevitable that I would fall even deeper.

I had reached the end of the hallway, and I recognized the recording rooms. Without thinking I entered the empty room in front of me and locked the door behind me. I leaned against the wall, and tried to calm my thoughts and worries. I would have to make the best of it. This was strictly a chance given to me to improve my composing skills. I sighed, and slipped down, until I sat at the floor with my back against the wall, my head in my hands, covering my eyes. “I have to lock my heart up. He won’t answer your feelings. Don’t be an idiot.” I tried to convince myself, without success, because when I only thought about the next day, my heart already warmed up, and quickened it’s beat. I sighed again, and again, every breath calming down my mind. If it was impossible to stop this feeling, I was going to enjoy it by myself. I was going to stay by his side, and I would enjoy every moment I was able to see his smile, to hear his voice. I would hide my feelings deep down and I would not give in to my feelings.

Feeling stronger as I had made up my mind I lifted myself from the floor, and walked to the keyboard. I placed my fingers on the keys and the music flowed right out of my mind. The sweet tones filled the room, and the lines formed in my mind. “Why? I have received so much love. The warmth is always surrounding me, but it never fills me. My heart keeps longing for your love, your warmth. But you keep looking the other way. You only see someone else, never looking at the real me.”

~~~~

*Hatchu!* I sneezed. Himchan teased, “someone must be talking about you” as he walked by. I ignored him, anxiously eying my phone, what the hell took her so long to replay? I threw my phone on the couch as I walked to the kitchen to grab a drink. Just as reached for a glass I heard my phone vibrate and ring. The glass slipped and crashed on the floor, cursing I ran to pick up the call. “Yongguk.” Was my short reply to the caller as I picked up the call. I paced back to the kitchen to clean up the mess I had made. A nervous voice was heard on the other side of the line. I couldn’t decipher the words being said. I calmed down a bit, wiping the glass pieces together, “Sorry?” I could hear the person on the other line sigh. “Annyeon hasseo Yonguk sunbae, with Lian, from HANA.” My heart sank, it wasn’t her. “Annyeong Lian, please talk comfortably. How are you doing?” “Thank you, I am doing fine. I wanted to thank you for talking to Mr Lee. I got permission to try composing for my individual activities.” I stared at the phone, I didn’t talk to him. My eyes drifted to Zelo, he winked at me. “Ah, that, it’s no problem Lian.” There fell an awkward silence, and I waited for Lian to talk again. Why had she called me? “Well I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.” “Huh? What do you mean?” Lian seemed just as surprised by my reaction, “Didn’t you know? Lee So Man said I would be training with you, you know as your student?” Her last words seemed hesitant. I shot a death glare at the back of Zelo, he shivered and looked over his shoulder, with an guilty expression. “Ah, of course how could I forget. I’ll see you tomorrow then. I am sorry but I’ll have to go now. See you tomorrow” A soft Bye was heard from the other side of the phone and I hung up.

“Yah Zelo!” He turned around and we stood nose to nose, how could you manage stuff like this behind my back?” Zelo grinned evilly. “I ‘accidentally’ overheard your conversation with Lian. You practically promised to be her teacher, so I took care of it, so you would keep your promise. Really hyung,” the maknae sighed, “Don’t make promises with girls if you can’t keep them. What sort of a gentleman are you?” The maknae scolded me. “Since you have a relationship with the devil you forgot about all our other friends except your members.” I just stood there, shocked about the words from the tall boy. Though he was taller I had always seen him as a dongseng, and this made me realize, maybe he was wiser then I had given him credit for. Zelo paced away, muttering something about homework. I felt an hand placed on my shoulder, “Don’t take it too much to the heart, but I do agree with him.” Himchan kneed my shoulder comforting, “Don’t forget about your own dreams because of a girl. Just leave her for now, and concentrate on Zelo and Jongup, they need you. And so does Lian.” He grinned, “If you think it’s a pain to teach her, I’ll gladly take you place.” I shook of his hand. “Don’t even think about it, she won’t fall for your looks or smile.” I walked to the door, but turned around in the opening holding the door open. “Thanks Himchan, you’re right.”

~~~***~~~

Did you like the chapter?

Has anyone picked up the hints and figured out who Yongguk’s girlfriend is?

I never planned to make this story so long… But soon we will reach our !

xD love you my readers

Please leave a comment!