[November 2011]

Turn around, jump, he does everything according to the choreography, but maybe because his movement lack something, he has to repeat it again and again. He’s tired but he didn’t say anything because he doesn’t think he can. He’s a rookie, in fact he can’t even be called a rookie yet because he still hasn’t debut yet.

“Sharp. Be sharp!” Jong In turns around to see Moon Gyu and the forever busy Sparkle behind him. He stands up and hugs them right away. They don’t know how glad he is to see them right now. When it came to Eun Mi, he hugged her tighter than the others, though he’s not as close to Eun Mi as Moon Gyu is but he was close to Kyu Wan, Eun Mi would be the girl version of Kyu Wan, telling her every hardship he’s having right now. Slowly, Eun Mi taps his back to give him support, the only thing he needed and the only thing she can give right now.

“I think when we debut one day, we will have a lot of antis because EXO really likes hugging. All of them just hug us whenever they want to!” Hyori said being annoying, but not as annoying as Chanyeol is.

“Noona, come back!! Come back!! Don’t turn yourself into Chan Yeol!!” Jong In said to Hyori, shaking her body roughly. Jong In doesn’t call Chan Yeol ‘hyung’.

“You… call me noona… but you don’t… call Chan Yeol… hyung?” Hyori try to speak while still being shaken by Jong In. She doesn’t mind if that makes him release his tense, because he needs to smile or laugh instead of putting all the stress in his head.

“What happen to the nice Lee Hyori? What happen to her? What kind of medicine did you took?” Jong In start smiling while shaking Hyori’s body.

“We don’t even know where that girl went to. She even calls me weird these days, I think Chan Yeol infected her in more ways than we can ever imagine,” Eun Mi said.

“Noona… come back!”

“Yah, stop it! I’m getting dizzy!” Hyori finally push Jong In’s hands off her when she’s getting dizzy. She was trying to stand straight when she finally ended up falling hard on the floor because of the dizziness. She shook her head, ‘the things I do to cheer my boys up’. She’s happy though, to see Jong In smiling again.

Jong In look to Moon Gyu and Jongyun who are busy talking, the two best friend that came on set to visit him ended up talking to each other instead of saying anything to him. He walks towards them and push himself in between them. He is so happy to meet the two of them that he doesn’t even care about the annoyed look they’re giving him.

“Chingu-ya, do you know how much I love you?” Jong In said to both of them. Both of them make a disgusted face and push his head backwards at the same time.

“Of course you wouldn’t know because you guys are stupid.” Jong In said smiling towards them. Jongyun elbowed him playfully on his stomach and Jong In just smile at both of them. He is ‘Kai’ now but it would be really nice if Moon Gyu and Jongyun would be one of the few people that won’t call him by that name. Even Sehun is getting used to his new name. He still need friends who can call him by his real name.

“So how long have you been recording?” Hyuna asks handing him a bottle of water.

“I don’t remember but after I finish today’s recording, I still have recording tomorrow. The other members will join me tomorrow,” Jong In said.

“Oppa, good luck for your recording. Even without my good luck wish, I know you can do it, because you’re Kim Jong In!” Min Yoong told Jong In, saying the words she always hears from Eun Mi when Eun Mi wants to give encouragement to other people. Eun Mi just laugh at how Min Yoong follow her words. ‘You can do it because you’re you’, doesn’t it gives you a lot of strength? No one can do it better than yourselves because it’s you. Those are the words Kyu Wan always say to her.

“Jong In-ah, Kyu Wan hyung is still supporting you, and he is waiting until he hears about your debut, so do your best. Remember, no one can do it better than you because it’s you! You can do it because you’re Kim Jong In!” All six of them chant on the last sentence to give him the supports he needed and all of them group hugged him before leaving the shooting location.

“So… tell me how do you feel after visiting Jong In at the shooting location?” Eun Mi asks when they are all in the company’s van.

“I won’t lie, I feel a bit jealous because you know, I might be standing at his place if I didn’t injure myself. But, I feel kind of relieved, seeing Jong In who never feels tired when he’s practicing is tired during the shooting, it must have been really hard. If I decided to go on with the debut even with my injury, I think I won’t be able to stand on stage again after that. I wanted to tell him to rest just now, but it’s only the beginning, the road won’t be that easy, I just hope that they will all take care of themselves no matter how hard it will be. I will still support them and be here when they need someone to lean on,” Moon Gyu said to Eun Mi. Eun Mi smile hearing his answer, this young boy is all grown up, she thought to herself.

“I’m worried… I’m worried about his health; I’m worried about everyone’s health. Like Moon Gyu said, Jong In never feels tired during practice because he’s doing what he enjoys the most, but when I see him feeling very tired just now, seeing the pale face and the sleepy eyes, I try so hard to control my facial expression so that I don’t look worried. Because, showing him how worried I am would only make him feel weak. I need to be strong to keep him strong,” Jongyun said. Eun Mi wanted her to say more, she hasn’t been that expressive these days, she keeps a lot of things inside. They all know, but she doesn’t seem to know that they know. They all know she miss Luhan but ever since their name was decided, Luhan name has never once come out from those lips.

“I honestly just feel happy for them. Isn’t this all the path we’ve chosen? They ought to know what they have to go through, so I’m not worried,” Hyori said and Hyuna nodded her head agreeing to it.

“Me? I need to say something too? I don’t know…” Min Yoong said as her eyes grew bigger, surprised that she too needs to say something. Eun Mi swears that Min Yoong is really the female version of Do Kyung Soo by how her eyes grew bigger. Maybe Min Yoong too have a lot of white eyes.

“I’m not jealous and I’m not worried. Sure, the road they’ve chosen won’t be easy, but that’s life. Every single road chosen would be hard, there’s nothing easy about living, if it is, then you’re not living. When we decided to enter the company, we all already know what kind of life is waiting for us, but none of us decided to leave, that means we all are ready to walk through it. But they can only walk through the roads with friends by their side, so I’ll be there for them whenever they need me to. Let’s all support them, ok?” Eun Mi said. She thinks of the chances Kyu Wan let go of, why he did that is still unknown to her but she knows he must have choose what’s best for him. She thinks of Jun Myeon and Kris and the responsibility they carry as the leader, as the pillar of support for the other members and only one word is crave in her heart and mind for them, “good luck!”

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Seriously though, let's all wish good luck to them and to ourselves.

Good luck to ourselves and whatever we are going to go through

Our studies, our life, good luck to it!

No one can do it better than you because it's you.

"YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE LEE JONGYUN",

"YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE LEE HYORI",

"YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE JEONG HYUNA",

"YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE PARK MIN YOONG"

AND

"YOU CAN DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE HAN EUN MI" 

The greatest gift you can give to yourself is to have faith in yourself in living your life. If your plan doesn't work, don't change your plan, change your ways in achieving it. 

To my girls, each of us are going through a hard time right now, pat your back and tell yourself, "you can do it!" 

I love you girls!! Never forget that!! [Don't cringe please]