Minwoo's P.O.V.


We were sitting in the restaurant not far away from the campus. It wasn't so crowded today, even though there was quite a bit of people. It was okay with me, it wasn't like we couldn't talk normally and on the other hand, I could show off a bit. It wasn't like people didn't notice we're dating by now, but there was quite a bit of them that were still surprised seeing us together. I was satisfied, but I could clearly tell Jaejoong wasn't. He seemed to be extremely uncomfortable and it hurt me to see that, but I shrugged it off and just kept smiling at him. We sat in silence, eating. He was doing his best not to look at me, while I kept staring at him.

"Is it okay?" I asked finally.

"Hm?" he asked, barely paying attention to me.

"The food. Do you like it?"

"It's fine." He said simply. He hesitated for a moment, then looked up. "Yours?"

I couldn't believe he actually asked me something. Even as simple and as meaningless as that it made me grin like a crazy fangirl who got noticed by her crush.

"Oh yeah, it's great." I nodded enthusiastically. He gave a small nod and looked back at his plate, continuing to eat. Silence followed once again.

I knew he was busying himself in order not to look at me nor at the people around us that were still occasionally giving us looks. I didn't pay attention to them whatsoever, I only wanted to pay attention to him. He was the one that interested me, no one else. I wondered why he still couldn't get that. Wasn't I clear enough already? Wasn't everything I did ever since I started running after him enough to make him change his opinion about me?

He finished eating and put his utensils down, then rested one of his hands on the table, using the other one to rest his chin on it. I smiled at him as he finally looked at me.

"Minwoo..." he started. I smiled even more. "Why are you doing this?"

"This what?" I asked back, frowning a bit as it seemed like we're going back to square one. I was getting a bit tired of explaining something as simple as that. Ever since we started going out he kept questioning me more then while I was only chasing him.

"This... running after me." He said sadly.


Jaejoong's P.O.V.


I didn't know what I was doing anymore. He confused me beyond everything. I waited. Ever since we started dating I waited for him to do something that would show me his true side. The one I knew so well, the one I expected for him to show once he felt comfortable enough. I hated myself for doing that, but I couldn't let go, I couldn't let myself become his. I didn't trust him one bit, I wanted him to fail, to not be able to take it anymore, to explode. That way I'd know I wasn't wrong. That way I'd be able to leave him and not look back. I never even once thought I might be wrong.

So, as much as it hurt me to keep questioning him, to keep questioning myself, I couldn't stop myself from asking. I was a mess and he was a cause of it all.

He watched me, his smile slowly turning into a deeper frown. He looked different and suddenly, I was afraid that I didn't know him at all. How many faces do you have Minwoo? Who are you?

"You still don't know?" he asked. I didn't say a thing. "You still don't trust me?" he continued.

"I've never seen you like this." I admitted. "And it scares me." I couldn't really hide anymore. I mean, what's the point?

"You're afraid of me?" He asked then, quite shocked.

"No, that's not what I meant." I replied quickly, looking away and noticing all the people staring at us again. I sighed, shaking my head. That's when I felt his hand on top of mine.

"You have nothing to be afraid of Jae." He said softly. I didn't look at him, instead I looked down. You have no idea how much it hurts Minwoo. I shook my head a bit.

"You're still not willing to take that risk." He added. "But you're not risking anything, trust me." I kept silent. He chuckled sadly. "Oh yeah, you can't do that yet." I looked at him.

"I don't understand you. I don't know... I just..." I shook my head, pulling my hand away from him. He looked at me sadly.

"It's alright. I understand." He nodded, then shut up.

We sat in silence again, but he wasn't looking at me. I looked back down, then up at him, watching him for a moment, before he finally looked back at me.

"I think I should go now, neh?" he gave me a small smile. I didn't say anything. He stood up and left, stopping by the bar that was nearby and obviously paying for our dinner.

He didn't even look at me before he walked out of the restaurant. I don't know him. I don't know him at all. But how can he be the cause of my pain?


Eric's P.O.V.


I walked into my room and stopped by the door as I looked at Yunho, a bit surprised to see him there. His afternoon coffee with Junjin were an every day ritual. Therefore, I was usually the one to come back to the room first - well, ever since I stopped going to the music department to watch Yoochun compose. But that's beside the point. I don't want to think about it. Finished story... right?

"Well... it's nice to see you too, Eric." Yunho said sarcastically, but a bit too cheerfully. I must've looked really surprised.

"What are you doing here?" I blurted out, walking over to the chair and putting my bag down.

"I live here." That smartass.

"I meant, aren't you suppose to be drinking coffee and be all over Junjin?" I rolled my eyes, making dumb facial expressions along with kissing sounds.

"Jealous?" Yunho laughed.

"Of course." I teased. It felt good, I haven't been talking to Yunho like this for ages. It was weird that thought crossed my mind at that moment. I missed those old times terribly. I wasn't the same person anyway and I knew it must have hurt Yunho and my other friends to see me like this. To see what I turned into these past couple of weeks. It's been awhile too. I frowned.

"I'm sorry, Yunho." I said suddenly. I could see his cheerful smile dropping as well at my words and he stood up from his bed and started walking over to me.

"What for?" he asked softly and I couldn't help but smile at my best friend. My best friend who has always been there for me, whenever I needed him. I never realized just how much I loved him, how much I appreciated his friendship. He was more then a friend, he was my brother. Truly special. If it wasn't for him I would still be all alone and desperate. It wasn't like I wasn't, but still, he made everything a lot better with just being there to watch me cry, to hold me and comfort me. He didn't even need words. We didn't even need words, he understood me, just like I understood him and just his presence was enough. I needed nothing more.

"For everything." I said as I already embraced him. "I was a jerk lately. And you kept up with me."

"Yeah, well, I have to." He chuckled. "You know it's not allowed to change roommates in the middle of the year without a good enough reason." I playfully hit him, letting a chuckle escape my lips. "Hey, you're laughing!" he exclaimed happily.

"I'm not laughing you jerk." I pulled away quickly and glared at him.

"Hey, I heard that, it was a chuckle. And I'm not a jerk, you... you... crybaby!" he replied quickly.

I gasped, widening my eyes dramatically.

"I'm not..." I started, thinking of what to say.

"Yeah, well, how do you call a person that whines and cries because they miss their dog?"

"You! I wasn't crying... and she's not a dog, she's my Marshy!" I cried out loud, pointing at him accusingly.

"Yeah, yeah... okay... dork." He chuckled, hugging me again. I smiled behind his back. "Wanna call her now?" he asked. I nodded, pulling away to look at him, making the saddest face I could, all together with the pout. He turned around to grab the phone. I grinned again, until he turned back around and handed me the phone.

It felt good. It felt extremely good. Maybe things will come back to normal.


Yoochun's P.O.V.


I opened the door. Jaejoong still hasn't come back, but I saw Hyesung earlier and he told me he went out with Minwoo. It was slightly weird to think Jae finally gave into Minwoo's charm, but I was glad nonetheless. He deserved to be happy, after everything that happened. And unlike him, I believed Minwoo is a good guy, I believed he won't hurt him.

However, what I didn't expect when I opened the door was to find my brother standing in front of me.

"Jin?" I questioned, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

"Hey Chun. Can I come in?" he asked. I moved from the door, opening it more and letting him slip in. He was always so... gracious. Unlike me. I don't know. We really looked nothing alike. And it never really bothered me. Just his behavior towards me did.

"What's up?" I asked, sitting on my bed and looking at him as he took a seat across from me.

"We need to talk." He replied. I raised my eyebrows, still not getting why he decided to visit me all of the sudden.

"Okay. What about?" I asked immediately. I was curious.

"About you and your... currently non-existent love life." He replied. I smirked. So, this is about Eric? I didn't say anything, just looked away. "What do you think you're doing?"


Junjin's P.O.V.


He quickly looked back at me, sending me a little glare. Obviously, he didn't find it suitable for me to ask him that. I couldn't blame him. Afterall, I did cause this all mess he was going through. They both are going through. All because I was selfish and inconsiderate.

"I-I'm sorry... I didn't..." I started quickly, afraid he might be mad at me now.

"You have no right to ask me that." He said coldly.

"I know, I'm sorry, I didn't want to say it like that... I wasn't thinking..." I apologized.

"You're right, you weren't thinking." Yoochun nodded. "You never think. All my life, you never once thought how I felt about something." He said. Every word hurt me. Only then I realized how much I must've hurt him. It took me so long to realize what I was doing. It took me so long to realize that I didn't want to do anything of that. And most of all it made me realize that I did in fact love him. He's my little brother. It might be late, but now I want to take care of his and protect him. It's not late... or is it?

"I'm sorry Chun." I said sadly. "I'm sorry about everything. I always gave you a hard time, didn't I?" I continued. He didn't say anything, he wasn't even looking at me. "And I went overboard this time."

I expected some kind of reply, but none came. I sighed.

"I don't know what to do about it now... except apologize." I added, truly not knowing what I should do to make him forgive me for everything.

"It's alright... I-I always understood you." He did? "I never said anything, I just wanted you to be happy. So, I put up with it all. You're my hyung Jin." Another pang of guilt clawed at my heart and I quickly moved over to his bed and pulled him into a hug.

"Jin..." he said, obviously taken aback with my sudden expressing of affection. We never hugged, never talked like this, never 'bonded' as brothers.

"I'm so sorry, Chun. I really am. I was so selfish and I never even thought about you and your feelings. About what you wanted, what you needed." I said, tightening my hold on him. He hugged me back hesitantly. We stayed like that for a long moment until he finally pulled away.

"It's alright, it's in the past now." He smiled a bit, sadly. "You're still my brother and we're alright now. I want us to be closer... is that okay?" he asked, like a little kid. I remembered when we were little, how he always wanted to be around me, how he looked up at me, how he wanted to be just like me. He had the same expression back then, that hopeful expression, wanting to be around me, to be a part of my life. I was his hyung. However, I never acted like one. And I needed to change that and change it quickly.

"Of course." I smiled broadly. "I want us to be closer too. I want us to finally be like true brothers. I want to be there for you whenever you need me... even when you don't." I chuckled. He grinned happily. I've never seen him like that, this was the first time he grinned at me. He was so happy, for the first time I didn't disappoint him, I showed my love towards him, I showed that I care. And I wanted to keep that grin on his face. I'll never make you suffer again, my little bro.

He didn't reply, instead he pulled me into another hug. He was already a grown up man, but he acted like such a child. He was so vulnerable and now it seemed like I took advantage of it. The thing with Eric bugged me so much, now more then ever. He deserved anything but what I did to him. To Eric as well.

"I need to talk to you, Chun. I'm serious." I said, still hugging him. I felt him stiffen slightly in my arms.

"About..." he choked on his own words. I was afraid he might start crying. But I couldn't just stop there.

"About Eric." I finished for him. I heard a sob. "Yoochun?" I asked, looking down at his face, but he hid it in my shoulder. I realized he was crying.

He never was the one to cry out loud. Ever since he was a baby. You could rarely hear him cry hard, loud and... hysterical. He rarely cried and even when he did it was faint... since he grew up I've never ever seen him cry. I knew he was keeping it all in him. Or if he did cry he was hiding, doing it away from everyone else. I knew he wasn't ashamed to cry, he just wasn't that kind of person. I also knew he did it like that because he didn't want to burden anyone. He never was a burden to anyone.

"Yoochun?" I asked again, more soothingly as I rubbed his back. He sobbed slightly louder and it truly was heart-wrenching. I let him cry for a moment.

"What am I going to do hyung?" he asked, finally calming down a bit. "I don't know what to do..."

"Chun... he loves you." I replied calmly, looking at him sadly.

"He doesn't... he can't love me anymore." He shook his head. "He gave up on me... I know he did."

"How?" I asked, confused. How could he be so sure?

"He just doesn't... I know." He replied firmly. "It hurts so much hyung, it hurts." He sobbed again, swallowing hard, obviously trying to stop himself from doing so. "I love him so much." He whispered.

"I don't believe that. He loves you. He's a wreck without you." I shook my head in return, quickly, wanting to make him believe, wanting to make him stop hurting himself.

"No..."

"Yes, just talk to him." I said. "What do you have to lose?" I asked then. He looked at me again.


Yoochun's P.O.V.


What do I have to lose? He was absolutely right. What did I have to lose? Absolutely nothing.