Chapter 32

Siwon’s pov

I realized I'm blessed... very blessed to have my girls, but somehow I still feel incomplete...

~two days before~

JungHoon hyung will be home tomorrow after taking three days off to Hongkong. Three days ago, after my fight with Kyuhyun, I let hyung take his leave which I promised him. He deserves his time off with his boyfriend. I don’t  want my sad love story effects him, he’s in the early stage of his deep love, so I don’t want him to be infected by my broken heart virus. Just let me deal with my own breaking heart and sorrow by myself.

Now, it’s almost 5pm, my last meeting of the day, actually there is one last presentation that I should attend to, but I don’t think my brain can process more information. It’s too hard for me to concentrate at the moment.

I felt my mobile phone vibrated, I glanced at the caller ID, Donghae hyung.

“Hello, hyung... what a coincidence, I was just thinking about you.” I answered his call without thinking much.

:”Aaaaw, really? Did you miss me already?” He squealed. It was always easy to make him happy. Actually, he just called me a few hours ago, to remind me to have lunch, how was it possible that I already miss him by now.

“Of course... hahaha. What’s up, hyung?” I asked him while I was giving a signal to Gina who was poking her head in my door, to coming in, and let her put the documents I needed in my briefcase.

:”Siwon-ah, let’s have dinner together, I missed you, you know...”

“Hyung, mianhae... but I’m beat... I just want to go home quickly.” I made up an excuse, yeah... I’m not in the mood to do anything.

: ”Come on, Siwon... it’s just dinner. You eat dinner, don’t you? Besides, immo is not home, I know you won’t be eating alone.”

“But, hyung~ “

: “Come on... my nieces will arrive tomorrow, right? After tomorrow, you definitely won’t have time to spare for me. They’re your #1.” I bet that Donghae Hyung is now pouting while saying that to me.

“Hahaha...No, hyung, they’re not my #1”

: “Really? D-does that mean... I’m your #1, Siwon-ah?” he said enthusiastically.

“No, hyung, the number one is my mom hahaha...”

: “Yaaah~~!”

“Hahaha... Arasso arasso... don’t worry, guy #3. Donghae hyung is my #3 man.”

: “Hahaha...gomawo Siwon-ah. So, we’re on for dinner, tonight?”

“Promise me, hyung... only dinner, ne?” I said giving up.

: “Ne... just dinner. Hyukie just landed a couple of hours ago, so he must be tired, too.”

“Okay, hyung. Usual place?”

: “No...No... I'm sorry, but my Hyukie doesn’t really like it in that expensive restaurant you like, hahaha... I’ll text you the address. See you at six? We’ll have coffee first if you’re still not hungry. You know what, hyung really miss you, Siwon-ah.” I know he’s worried for me, during the times when my mom went to New York to get the girls, and JungHoon hyung in Hongkong, Donghae hyung would call me to check on me..just to remind me to eat or know if I already ate or not. I don’t know how many times he would call me in a day.

“Ne, hyung. I’ll tell Daebin hyung, so he doesn’t have to come with me to the house.”

: “Okay then. See you, Siwon-ah...”

~*~*~

Only dinner huh? Bullsh*t... sigh... even though I’ve already given them thousands of reasons, Eunhae couple succeeded dragging me to a karaoke. Looking at their lovey-dovey actions earlier really made my eyes sore... and that was in a place full of bright lights, moreover now, in a karaoke room, with dim lights, my eyes are really going to have severe iritations.

After they crazily sang fast beat songs and danced to 'Oppa Oppa' which I don’t really have any idea where and when they practiced such weird but-cute dance moves, Donghae hyung throws himself on the sofa, right next to me, “Siwon-ah, let’s have fun... let's sing...” he said while wrapping his hand around my shoulder, when Hyukjae still busy choosing the next song.

“No, thanks, hyung. I’m not in the mood to sing.” I replied him while sipping my juice, which doesn’t taste like the apple juice I ordered, 'What kind of juice is this? eew...'

“Yah! Not in the mood? Again? Are you a robot!?” he said pushing me forward a bit from my seat and his hands were like trying to find something on my back, “Tell me where’s your switch, I want to reset your boring mood” he pretended to be angry at me.

I just chuckled, putting my juice, that was almost spilt, on the table, “Hyung, you both singing are enough. I’m entertained enough just by seeing you both so hyped up...” Donghae just smiled at me and ruffled my hair. 

"So, how's Kyuhyun?" He suddenly asked.

"Hae hyung, please just drop it, I don't want talk about him tonight, you said that you want me to have fun tonight." I lowered my head, 'I miss you too much, Kyu... but I know nothing about you now, I desperately  want run to you now and hold you in my arms, but I must give you time to mend. Baby, I'm waiting for you to call me... to let me explain about my Sheila.'

“Okay okay... I'm sorry." Donghae hyung's patted my head. "By the way, Siwon-ah..." He changed the subject, "You didn’t eat earlier, what about ordering something to eat now?” he asked me with a worried face. 

“It’s okay hyung, not that hungry... maybe later.”

Suddenly Hyukjae holered, “Hae, do you remember our song? The one when you were upset with me? Hahaha, wanna listen to it again?”

“Which time, Hyukie?” replied Donghae hyung.

“Oh yeah... I forgot, you were upset or cranky so many times in just the few months we were together...” Hyukjae chuckled, Donghae just stick out his tongue in reply and blushed.

“Well, the time when we were in Dubai, but I didn’t get to take you to Al-Burj hotel, to see the aquarium... remember?” Hyukjae reminding him, grinning and winking to Donghae hyung.

“Oh yeah... I remember... But YAAH!! Why didn’t we go to see the aquarium, instead rally to the desert while we were in Dubai, Hyukie? The aquarium is really great." He turned his head to me, "Oh, you've been go there too last year, the aquarium is really great, right Siwon-ah?” Hae hyung looked at me with his puppy eyes.

I scratched my not-so-itchy-head, “Mmm... yeah, it’s great.”

“What’s with the tone? You saw the aquarium, right? The fish were beautiful, right?”Donghae hyung's eyes widened.

“Yeah, it was beautiful... But well, the truth is, I don’t know hyung, I had only three hours in Dubai that time, and I just happen to pass the aquarium on my way to meet my client for lunch at Al-Burj’s restaurant." I tried to smile wide, hoping Donghae hyung won’t shout at me... I really don’t know why my hyung really likes those  fishy things.

“Wuaaah!!! Unbelievable!! You two are just the same... no respect for those priceless fish.” Donghae hyung said shaking his head.

“Priceless fish? But I ate them...” I murmered.

Suddenly Donghae hyung gave me a smack on my head, I think he heard what I murmured earlier, “Yaaaahhh~~~!”

"Ouchhh... hyung~~~"

Hyukjae burst out laughing, then continued, “Alright then, confirmed, the next song is the song I sang for Hae when he got crancky with me because of those fiiiiiiiiiish...” Donghae hyung pouted, crossed his arms on his chest and resting his body on the couch.

Hyukjae pressed the 'play' button on the remote, and grab the mic in front of him. I was curious of what kind of song Hyukjae used to coax a cranky Donghae hyung... it must’ve been a great song to have made him melt at that time... and just discussing it awhile ago, he still shows that he was still upset about it.

“Okay, I'll start now... this is for you, my lovely Hae...” and Hyukjae started singing...

Cracks of my broken heart

Maybe we need just a little more time

Time that can heal what's been on your mind

You can find what we lost before it all slips away

We need time to mend from the mistakes I've made

God only knows what a heart can survive

So many tears from all the pain in our lives

And where else could we go after all we've been through

I still believe my life is right here with you 

So just hold on

And it won’t take long

I hope that you can love me

When the pain is gone

I don't want us to fall through the cracks of a broken heart

Don't want us to fall through the cracks of your broken heart 

There's a light that can burn

It exists in the heart

You can feel it when you know love is true

If you could try to be strong

And keep the light burning long

It took a lifetime but I found it in you

Hold on

And it wont take long

I hope that you can love me

When the pain is gone

I don't want us to fall through the cracks of a broken heart

Don't want us to fall through the cracks of your broken heart

[Hyukjae’s voice when he is singing this song, here is the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRBAjvq2qJ8

or you can search: ‘Eunhyuk Cracks of my broken heart’ on youtube] 

~present~

JungHoon hyung and I were in the car on our way to the office. It’s almost 10 am. If it weren’t for that important meeting, which cannot be substituted, I wouldn’t even think of going to the office. Not just because my head is still hurting, but more to not having the heart seeing Sheila’s teary eyes when she knew I wouldn’t be able to spend the day with her. It shows how much she missed me. The same with Bella, who was really upset knowing that I have to go to the office... she said that my face was still pale and that I should still be in bed.

Unconsciously, I smiled, remembering both of my girls... They threatened me if I don’t get home before 6pm, they will fire me as their dad... both pouting their cute lips, I think they learned that pouty lips from Sungmin Hyung.

“Siwon, why are you smiling to yourself?” JungHoon hyung startled me, then handing me a food container. I raised my eyebrow, “I know it’s over for breakfast time, but I figured your stomach should be filled with something, Siwon.” He said again.

“Just thinking of the girls, hyung. I want to spend my time with them actually... By the way, you made my breakfast and lunch since yesterday. Did my mother put you up to this?” I said opening the container lid 'steamed chicken rice, carrots and brocolies'.

“Mmm... sort of like that...” he replied randomly.

“So healthy... this is SO not you, hyung. But you made this?” I asked him while puting a spoonful of rice in my mouth, and chewing it slowly.

“Uh...oh... no no... I don’t know who made it, I was just told to bring it.”

“Just told to bring it, hyung?” I was curious, then putting the brocoli into my mouth.

“Yup, it was prepared already, so I just brought it for you.”

"Who told you, I mean to bring this food..."

"Just eat it, will you, Siwon-ah?" He looked away.

“Oh, okay..” I scooped some more of the steamed chicken rice... why am I not feeling nausea? I just remembered, “Hyung, actually, why did you bring me breakfast and lunch? And you know what, hyung... the weird part is that I ate the food without feeling nausea and throwing it up again. So weird...”  I tilted my head and looked at my food again.

"Mmm... I brought it for you cause mmm... Oh, you know... just to thank you, for giving me days off... and pocket money?" He just shrugged.

"You brought it, okay, I get that... but who made it?" I asked him again.

"I told you already... I don't know" He was scratching his nose.

"Here here... drink this." JungHoon hyung handed the glass of juice because I was a bit choking on my food, then give it back to him, putting the carrot into my mouth,  "I'll ask Kim-jibsa then." I said iritatedly.

“Huh...? W-whatever...” He drank my juice.

“Hyuuuung~ why you did you drink my juice...?” I whined.

"I'm just a bit curious... Well, I admit, it taste refreshing, isn't it?" He said chuckling without guilt. 

"Hyung, you can ask Kim-jibsa to prepare two glasses, don't drink mine..." I protested.

He didn't answer me, he was just mumbling randomly, I heard him saying something like 'As if I could... you just don't know who made it for you.'

~*~*~

~4pm at the meeting room, Choi’s Tower~

"Thank you so much for agreeing to this deal, Mr. Kangin, it would be my pleasure to work with you." I said smiling and shaking Mr. Kangin's hand. He is the owner of a very prestigous and big contractor in South Korea, ELF Engineering & Constructions Ltd., and now has sealed a deal with our company in building our lastest project, a hospital.

"Well, you are more eager and persistent compared to your father in this kind of matters, I didn't get any profit this time." Mr. Kangin commented while rubbing his chin with his left hand while the other hand was still shaking mine.

"Hahaha... come on,  Sir... it's not that you didn't get any profits, but you didn't get much, not like your profits in our previous projects." I said pating his arm with my left hand.

Eventualy he smiled, "Mr. Choi, it appears that you know what you're doing in this project, you are an expert hahaha... and I can understand your reason building this hospital for the people in need, so I will see to it that our team will do our best according to your specifications."

"Hahaha... thank you, Mr. Kangin, I know I can count on you. I'll introduce you to doctor Leeteuk, who's going to be the head of this hospital you're building, he'll fill you in for more details for the finishing process." I continued on while walking with him to the elevator. "He wanted to be involved directly, he wants everything to be perfect and comfortable for the patients."

"He is a great doctor, I bet. I can't wait to meet him. Hahaha... but is he bald and fat?" He asked seriously.

I laughed ot loud, "Well, the last time I met him, he still has his hair and his built was still okay, Mr. Kangin."

"Hahaha... glad to hear that. I'm boring of talking to my bald and fat doctor..." He joked while stepping inside the elevator with his team. 

"Hahaha... don't worry, you will like him. Well, see you next time, Mr. Kangin. And thank you." I continued smiling and bowed to him. 

"Ne, Mr. Choi. Gamsahamnida" He replied and bowed to me before the elevator door closes.

~*~*~

I walked back to my office, Gina greeted me and asked, "Everything went well, Director Choi?"

"Ne, Gina-ssi." Also nodding in response to her, "Please gather my things, I want to go home."

"Yes, Sir. I bet you wanted to spend time with your daughters, don't you, Director Choi?" Of course she knows about my girls, she was the one handling my mom's and the girls' arrival from New York, cause that time JungHoon hyung was still in Hongkong, but luckily he was able to pick them up at the airport that night.

Gina was still putting the documents that I need to bring home in my briefcase, while I was lying down on the couch, my hands on my forehead and closed my eyes, "Are you feeling okay, Director Choi?" She asked me, while still continuing her work.

"Yes, Gina-ssi. I'm fine. But when you're done, can you please call in the clinic doctor, I think I need some IV for my shots, I don't want to have it at home in front of the girls."

"Ne, director Choi." Gina sounded hurrying so she can call the doctor, very noisy. "Please excuse me, Director Choi." And that was the last thing I heard she said something before she went out the door. Then, silence. And in silence, I don't know why, but somehow the lyrics from the song Hyukjae sang two days ago was still lingering in my mind... I felt a pang in my heart... ...

#Maybe we need just a little more time, Time that can heal what's been on your mind, You can find what we lost before it all slips away, We need time to mend from the mistakes I've made.#

‘Please make sure... make sure that you don't need a lot of time to mend, because I haven’t much time, babyKyu...’

#God only knows what a heart can survive, So many tears from all the pain in our lives, And where else could we go after all we've been through, I still believe my life is right here with you.#

‘Of course we can survive, and I do want to spend the time I have left in your arms, my love'

# So just hold on, And it won’t take long, I hope that you can love me, When the pain is gone, I don't want us to fall through the cracks of a broken heart, Don't want us to fall through the cracks of your broken heart.#

‘I love you... please don’t broke your heart because of the mistakes I’ve made, and yes... baby, please hold on.'

# There's a light that can burn, It exists in the heart, You can feel it when you know love is true, If you could try to be strong, And keep the light burning long, It took a lifetime but I found it in you.#

‘Baby... I know I'm being selfish, but please try to be strong, for me... for us. I’ve been waiting for you, and yes, it took a lifetime to finally find it in you and realize it, it was you all along.’

# Hold on, And it wont take long, I hope that you can love me, When the pain is gone, I don't want us to fall through the cracks of a broken heart, Don't want us to fall through the cracks of your broken heart#

‘Just look beyond me, and you know you will find my love for you.  Baby, I know I shouldn't be doing this, I know that I can't love you, my love will make you go through more pain, I know... But even though I know, I can't do anything, I can only think of you. If I close my two eyes, or open them again, I can only think of you. The memory I can't erase for one second, I just think of you. So baby, you know this life doesn't last forever, please just believe and love me... Hold on my hand... I really hope the pain I caused you will be gone soon, but don’t take too long... Because I really haven't much time, and I really need you by my side. I don't want us to fall through the cracks of our broken heart.’